Hello everyone,

My name is Belkis, and I've been labeled as obese since I was about 12 years old (I'm almost 21 now). I currently weigh 215 lbs, the heaviest I've ever been At the moment, I have gained weight because I have no job, I stay at home babysitting my boyfriend's toddler siblings, and all I do is eat. I have this obsession with food! If I'm bored, I eat. If I go out, I want to eat. I'm desperate to lose weight, and the total I'd like to lose, at least is 70 pounds, which would put me at 145. If anyone would like to connect as support buddies, or even offer me advice as to how I should go about this and stick with it for the long term, I'd really appreciate it. I have no support system whatsoever, so this is my last hope. Thanks for reading!

I am right here with you, I just joined today and I also am looking for any and all the support that I can get. I am 26 years old, I have 4 sons ages 8,6,4, and 2 mo. and I too am also at my heaviest. I was at 206.8 and have made it to 196 lbs within a week, but I yo-yo so often and easily that I can no longer be proud of myself for a 10 lb. weight loss, due to just believing it'll be back up soon.. I lose and gain weight very easily and quickly sometimes I can lose 5 lbs. in a day and gain 6 the next.. I am tired of starting diets, losing weight, gaining it, giving up and quiting just to try and start over again. I want to stick to it for once no matter how slow the weight comes off, I just don't want it to come back! I also do not work and stay at home, I too love food lol and do know exactly how you feel. We're not to far off in starting weights and/or goal weights. I need to lose 66 more lbs. to reach my goal weight. And I too am without any support whatsoever and desperately seek it. And I think we'd make great support buddies if you up for it?

Hey Vanessa It's nice to hear someone understands. I'm constantly around others who truly dont understand my situation lol. I'm also tired of starting diets, and shooting back up! Then again, it's my fault for eating so much.

I'm definitely up for being fitness buddies. It's important to surround yourself with people who understand you and won't be quick to judge. How have you lost weight so far??

Hello to you. I am currently going through the same thing only i just had a baby 4 months ago and gained about 70 pounds I weigh 217 right now the biggest i've ever been in my life and i'm looking to lose about 80 pounds but i don't even know where to start. I moved away from my family and friends and ended up moving where my boyfriend is from around his family and friends who i don't know too well and now i stay home with my daughter....I need help and support but don't really have that so i was coming here to see if i could find that. We can do this though, i just know it. All we need to do is put in some hard work and dedication. Now where did my motivation go....haha only kidding. i'm used to working out with a buddy and now that i have no one....i'm not really sure how i'm going to find the motivation to start. Good luck to you!

Hi!
I don't know if I have any answers as I am in the same boat as all of you but I can offer all I know and all the support I can give.
Take Care.

Welcome Belkis, and everyone else!

You've all come to a good place if it's support you need. There are so many people here, at so many different stages of the journey, that no matter what happens along the way or what obstacles you face, there'll be someone else who knows just how you're feeling and can offer advice. Have a poke around the various forums, and jump in when something interests you.

Now, advice to start with: Belkis, you've just said yourself you're obsessed with food. Work out why! Of course, that's easier said than done, but if you focus on why you're obsessed and overeating for a little while, you'll learn a lot about what's going on in both your mind and your body. A lot of people here keep food diaries, because they help in all sorts of ways. For a start, you need to know exactly what you're eating in order to change it, but also you can write down how you're feeling when you want to eat, and work out what your triggers are and so on.

Vnessarene: have you come across the idea of water weight yet? When you lose five pounds in a day and gain six the next, that's not fat, it's just water, and food inside your digestive tract. Our bodies retain water for all sorts of necessary and important reasons, and if you stress about it you'll drive yourself mad. You can weigh yourself as much or as little as you like, but don't set any store by the fluctuations over the course of a day. First thing in the morning before breakfast is a good weight to count, because the weight of the food and drink you consume is going to make the scale numbers go all over the place.

And finally, Stephlarr05 - though this is applicable for us all - when you're lacking motivation, think about where you want to be in a year's time. Time will pass whether you're making healthy changes or not, so why wait and waste the time being unhappy with your body?

Welcome again, and good luck to you all!

Welcome to all the new members here! 3FC is an amazing support network and has helped me so many times with advice, motivation and just friendship.

Now, Brid here ^ has given you some brilliant advice. Belkis, if you think your food obsession is a serious problem that is going to stand in the way of you getting yourself to a healthy weight, it would be a good idea to consider a therapy such as CBT to help you get to the root cause of it. Brid hit the nail on the head regarding food and emotional triggers.

Vnessarene, Brid was right here too. It is physically impossible to gain 6lbs of fat overnight, as you would have had to have consumed tens of thousands of calories worth of food, which even most very overweight people aren't in the habit of. Bear in mind that to lose 1lb of fat, you must burn 3500 calories. So it's going to be water retention, undigested food and waste that will make your scale tip so suddenly. Mostly water.

To everyone, the most obvious thing to advise you to do is to restructure the things you eat and to start an exercise regime.
As for the word 'diet', diets don't work. We break diets, cheat on them and even if we lose weight on them, we'll put it back on afterwards because the essence of the idea of a diet is being temporary. Just eating restrictions until you lose the weight, then going back to normal eating.
What you want to do is to make a permanent, healthy change to what you're eating. Educate yourselves on nutrition, what foods are beneficial and detrimental to your health. Learn why refined and processed foods like sugar and white flour products are bad for you and that wholegrains are good. See it as a revolution to reclaim your health for good.

As for the exercise, it can be brilliant fun and take many forms. For example, lots of people have discovered Zumba is a fun and effective way to get a workout. But I have two left feet and can't dance to save my life - I prefer running and boxercise.

Your lifestyle change will be uniquely what works for you. Some people experiment with different ways to go about it until they find ways that suit them. I'm on a wholefoods, mostly organic diet and I g running and boxing regularly. Someone else might do zumba and a paleo diet. But whatever you decide to do, there will always be people here at 3FC ready to support you.

Hey! You have came to the right place the best thing so far with starting that I have learned was just STAY BUSY with something. I am a beginner at this as well. So far I have learned if you are really just sitting and doing nothing I will definitely eat only because im bored. Its really hard when you have no support. I know exactly where you're coming from, I've been big for as long as I can remember. I just came down from being 300lbs. Just start in little steps and make sure you incorporate SOME activity in your daily routine no matter what it is. Everybody is different but I found that I do not eat as much after some type of physical activity. I am still struggling with my food obsession as well. I LOVE food! I also try to find the healthiest things that I like and eat those throughout the day. Try to incorporate more healthy fresh foods into your daily eating.

Thank you everyone for participating in my thread Brid & Marchmallow, thanks for your advice! My emotions also play a role in my eating, because it also makes me feel happy. Unfortunately, I don't have the means to go to CBT, but I'm going to try my hardest to eat healthier. It's very true that diets are temporary, it's time to think of this as a permanent lifestyle change..

Steph: Congrats on the baby I understand how you feel about the weight. I always told myself I would NEVER pass 200, and it happened. Anyway, good luck to you as well! Feel free to let me know how it goes for you!!

Pixel: Thank you! I'm def. going to try and incorporate healthier foods into my daily eating, and congrats on losing weight