I used the dollar signs because I'm moving back to AMERICA in exactly five weeks. I feel like simultaneously laughing, crying, puking and eating when I think about the move.

Proud to announce I went an entire week without binging, including a huge party weekend. I did have a couple donuts and a cookie after dinner last night, but I didn't keep going like I would if I were on a binge. Maybe that scratched whatever stupid tantrum-y "itch" I seem to get that triggers binges. My weight is up but it'll go down; salty food at the wedding + donuts and I haven't been getting enough sleep.

Wore an extremely naked dress to a farewell party for leaving English teachers on Saturday night, turned heads, received loads of compliments from people who never talk to me, ego +100000. For those long-time weekly chatters, it was the same dress I was babbling about for New Year's Eve. Completely backless halter with plunging/draped front neckline, animal print, very short.

Picture here, I'm on the right, and the other 2 are the same friends I spent New Year's Eve with: http://a2.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphot..._5496236_n.jpg

Hope everyone is doing well! I'm having a hard time caring about weight loss at this point; I'll be satisfied if I can keep maintaining and not gain a bunch in the coming weeks of nonstop busy.

You look great! And it sounds like you're doing pretty great! Sometimes other things in life have to take top priority - good luck keeping everything balanced during the next few weeks.

krampus I guess moving back must be kind of scary after so long away? But relieving as well? You look great in the pic, go you on the compliments!! And way to go on not binging!

Alright...so I'm trying, as I said, to be more active - if I fail it's because my mind has failed - seriously since starting this job, my weeks are something like this:

Wake up Monday. Go to work Monday - Friday. Calorie count til Friday evening. Eat relatively well during the weeks with a few more treat type things than I should. Busy most evenings either recovering from busy days at work or doing things with my art stuff in our new studio/gallery space.

Friday comes, I finish work, I drink. Most Fridays. I understand why people feel the need to have a drink to relax...and I am starting to worry about myself a little bit in that respect. In the past couple of weeks I've had friends tell me I'm different when I drink. I think it has to do with the fact I drink a whole lot less but it affects me way more than it used to. Also I've noticed that I'm way more self-conscious now that I'm smaller. Anyway, my boyfriend and a few other friends have commented that I sometimes get a bit obnoxious when I'm drinking - which is something I want to get out of right away, as that is just not me and I don't understand where it's coming from.

My goals by trying to be more active on here are also trying to gain accountability. I need to get back into losing. I really want to see a number under 60kg on the scale! I really want to continue losing and get down to my original goal! I also need to be eating better...I think the fact that I've figured out that if I count and stick to around 1400-1600 on weekdays and then basically eat whatever I want (within reason) on weekends and not count but still maintain has left me too content...and while I guess it's been a good balance and a nice break, I know I need to get back to doing this properly.

Exercise...I don't even know where to start. I haven't done anything in a good few weeks. I am so tired when I get home from work and I want to catch up on reading blogs and all the other stuff...and then by dinner I've done that and then after dinner it's basically bed.

Alright, sorry for the big unload!!

krampus, heyyyy!!! i can't believe you're leaving!! we must have one last party before you go... also, congrats on the non-bingeing! i know that is definitely a victory! lol.

rainbow, hey! aah, real jobs can suck sometimes, eheh... i don't drink to relieve the stress... i eat! ha! but i totally understand what you mean. it's a shame people are saying you "change" when you drink... maybe you should try switching to stuff that's lighter in alocohol contents? then you could still enjoy yourself but not get drunk enough to "switch"? good luck with that...

okay, firs of all, IT'S SO HOT HERE!!!! it's not even funny... it's really humid and hot, and there is no a/c at school... i'm dying. last week i was awol cuz i was having my traditional monthly migraine, but because of the heat, it made it morph into something even more horrible, that rendered me completely unable to work. or sit or stand, for that matter. good for my diet though, i barely ate anything for 3 days. lol. last weekend i've also been quite good, cuz i went to tokyo and i was really busy and basically didn't have time to eat. i also lost my wallet, which was less fun, and spent sunday running around because of it... urgh. well, it wasn't my "real" wallet, luckily, just a small one for clubbing, but it did have some important things in it that are gonna be a pain to replace. *sigh*

anyways, but yeah, scale was down a bit more this morning, so hopefully i can get this good trend going...

kawaiiGood to hear the scale is going down, that's good! Sorry your lost your wallet, things like that suck, replacing stuff can be a pain, hope it isn't too stressful for you. It's freezing here at the moment...I mean as freezing as I know since I guess in the scheme of things NZ weather is pretty tame... I think with the alcohol, the problem is that I start drinking and I know that I want to get at least tipsy...but I have a problem stopping when I'm tipsy, because generally it happens after 2 drinks, sometimes only one! And I'm still trying to drink low cal drinks like vodka with diet soda...urgh. I dunno. I know I get self deprecating when I'm drinking, but the abrasive/obnoxious thing is something I want to tame completely - I just make crass jokes and basically yell at people - not in an angry way, but just in a loud annoying controlling type of way. It is not me at all! I was going to say that eating is a better way to relieve stress but I guess neither is good...

Omg i wrote this huge reply to people and now its gone. Grrr!

Rainbow- i dont care what anyone says, its cold here. And yes, alcohol and food are not recommended stress relievers lol, but you know that already. I found that I drank more to have something to do in social situations and it was fairly easy to switch to just soft drinks, maybe thats an idea? then you get the same social support/stress relief without the drunkeness? Dunno

Kawaii- i am totally jealous of your weather! I would rather have it humid and hot than cold and damp LAme about your wallet, but good on you with the eating!

Krampus- you are looking so good! What will you do when you are back in the US? Will you do the same thing as you did before you left?

As for me, things are ticking over I guess. Had mock exams last week which i did suprisingly well in, and the feedback was generally good- "you need to know more stuff", "dont be so vague with your patients", "dont make things up in your psych reports" xD Lol. Managed to cope without eating too much but i have been over eating and under exercising a lot lately, so need to get back onto the bandwagon! Apart from that, being engaged is all good, people are still noticing which is always nice. Not a lot of wedding planning going on though xD

Icon It is cold! Today was freezing. I used the heater in my car on the way to work for the first time. OMG engaged congrats! How awesome! Glad to hear your mock exams went well. Thanks for the advice re drinking - but unfortunately I'm past the social crutch stage - I used to use it in that way, but now I know that I'm drinking purely for that little buzz and feeling of relaxation I get...the kind of carefree feeling. Eek, saying stuff like that freaks me out because I know it's not a good mindset when it comes to alcohol. Problem is, the only other thing I can think of that gives me similar are foods that are bad for me that taste good like pizza and cheeseburgers -_- fail.

Krampus - I Can't see your picture until I get home because work has that site blocked haha. But I'm sure you look amazing. Counting down the weeks before you head back to America, are you excited? I don't remember reading if that's something you wanted to do or if it was something you had to do, I've been kind of out of the loop for a few weeks.

Kawaii - I hate heat, I don't like the cold either. I like it when it's in between where your not sweating your balls off (not literally of course) and not freezing up like a popcycle. Ugh wallet losing and yay for scale being a bit down for today!

Rainbow - You and I are total opposite hehe, I try to be higher up in calories during the week because of my insanity workout and weekends I pretty much am trying to be in "starvation" mode as they call it to balance it out. You'll get back on a regular routine soon, trust me it took me 3 months of maintaining then my body shooting back up to 164 for me to say holy I need to get back into this!

Icon - LOL don't make things up on your psych reports. Too funny! You're engaged? Holy **** I've really been out of the loop congrats!

==

It's good to see the "old" gang back on weekly chat, haha it's been how long? the scale was back up to 159 this morning which is fine at least it's out of the 160's...and I don't blame it for being up after the Nutella I ate right before bed...bad bad bad. Pay day comes early this week and this week is only a 4 day work week do to Canada Day WOOT! Also i'm on week 2 of insanity! Bring it on, and on 5 days of training for C25K since me and sweets missed 2 days last week we're going to make up this week! Hmm I should also really go to the Part-time job I was fired from and collect my cheque sometime this week haha, it's just I have a routine and that goes out of my way and messes up my routine. Anyways happy monday ladies!

MiZ: Yah! I agree ...seeing everyone back on here gives me more motivation too!! LOL. Yay for Week 2!
Icon: Do you have a date set on when ya'll are getting married yet?
Kawaii: Yay for the scale being down. Ugh and no a/c in the school? I would dieee! I have to have my air conditoner especially in the humidity!
Rainbow: Sounds like you are one busy woman! I'm with you with wanting to lose more. My original goal was 125 while I have been maintaing between 129-132! It's driving me crazyyy!! I'm glad your back though because you always have something exciting going on and interesting to read about lol.
Krampus: I'm sure I've told you this a DOZEN times but you are BEAUTIFUL! Yaying for going a week without BINGING thats awesome!

Ok. So I'M about 2 go crazy! I have been bouncing between 129 and 132 for a month and a half now. And I self-sabotage like crazy once I get down to 129...WUTS WRONG WITH ME?? It's happened 3-4x this month!! Ugh so here I go again...Day 1 of NO binging. My life sucks! LOL.

But on a bright note tomorrow we are going to a waterpark and its just me and my hubbyy! I haven't got to spend time w/ him without the kids since my youngest son was born which was 10 months ago. I can't wait. Hope everyone enjoys their Monday! Today is 30DS day!

Hi to all the ladies in hot and humid to cold weather, tehe!

It's a new week and a new me. Why?

I ENTERED A 10K RACE!

Sorry, but I'm just really excited about this!! I've been running on and off for about 3 years but always found myself dropping off the bandwagon even though I enjoy it. So I thought "you know what? I'm just going to enter a race and then I have to train for it."

It's on the 14th August and I found myself a 10K novice training plan - If anyone is interested in reading it, you can click here =)

It's in 7 weeks, so I have to skip a week in the training programme but because I can run about 2.5 miles regardless of training I'm hoping I'll just catch up.

What really forced me into the decision was seeing some of the Goal threads in this forum, particularly Fat Pants's story on how she lost the weight due to entering a race and also Kendrab1223's before and after pics - she's the same height and in her before pics that's exactly my weight. I want to look as good as these ladies do one day!

Hey guys!

Guess what?

184 this morning!!!! I'm not obese anymore!

Hello, all!!

Riestrella: Good luck!

doubtingJulia: Way to go! That's excellent!!

Krampus: Wow, you look amazing!

Rainbow: Have you tried alternating your drinks with a glass of water? Might help reduce the obnoxiousness if you're drinking more slowly.

MiZ: I'm completely impressed you've managed to keep up with Insanity. Just wow.

JL: A waterpark sounds like a lot of fun. Have a good time!


As for me, late last night we got back from being out of town for the funeral. I'm up 2 lbs since Thursday, but down a little bit in inches and just generally am not letting it get to me. Food wasn't my top concern while away and frankly, walking around in size 10 jeans and dress, I looked great and felt great, so those two pounds really can't shake me right now. If they don't go away soon, however... lol.

Ferumbras: That's a very good attitude to take. I think every once in a while you have to stop and realise how far you've come, and realise that it's all about how you feel not about the number on the scale.

MiZ Insanity sounds...well..insane haha. I hope I get back into a routine soon!

JL I find it kind of amusing you think my life is exciting haha! I don't think it's very exciting...just too busy at the moment! Waterpark sounds like fun, I hope it's a blast!

Riestrella Woohoo a 10k race! That's awesome! And sounds like great motivation too!

doubtingJulia Yay for being not obese anymore!

Ferumbras I haven't tried it...I know I probably should. Or just realise that I'm already feeling the effects after one drink and maybe not drink so quickly. It's silly that I know the problem yet still can't quite stop it...I'm sorry for your loss, I guess I missed that in the last week's chat.

~So I'm at work...on my lunch break, and I need to go get something else to eat so I'm only on here briefly. I don't always get a break as I get pretty busy! But I thought I'd quickly check in here. Anyway, I am starving today. I always feel hungrier at work, maybe it's because I feel like I deserve snacks as treats for all the work that I'm doing? I'm not really sure.
TOnight I'm going to my parents for dinner, I'm making an effort to do that once a week as I'm just not seeing them enough anymore.
I also have the new episode of True Blood to watch at some point, so no spoilers please!
Urgh. I am craving chocolate. Going to work out my calories for the day so far and see what I can weasel in. Check in with you guys after work!

rainbow, yeah, nothing's good i guess... good luck with that! and hang in there with the cravings.... here, these days, it's kinda easy cuz, with this heat, i just don't want to eat!! lol.

Icon, ha! you do not want this weather, i promise you!! and well done on your tests! ooooh, you're engaged now?! congrats!!

Miz, i'm the same, but i deal a bit better with being cold than with being hot... my body actually shuts down when it's this hot... Nutella is bad, bad, bad!! don't keep it in your house!! lol.

JL, yah.. no aircon is insane! the japanese are ridiculously proud of their ability to "endure" stuff, especially when it's completely useless... aww, but you are so close to your goal weight now, so it must be that much harder to stay focused! hang in there! waterpark!!! sounds like heaven right now!! have fun with hubby

Riestrella, congrats on the race stuff! i could never do that, haha...

julia, congrats!

Ferumbras... lost inches is good! ignore that scale! it's probably just salt and stuff....

aaah, i'm so sleepy and hot today... it's just too hot here... 3 more hours and one class to go... i can do this!! can i??? today, scale said the same as yesterday, even though i didn't eat much, so i was a little bit miffed. still hopefully it'll go down tomorrow, since i was good