Ok, I'm kind of losing it. I had lost about 16 pounds and now I've gained most or possibly all of it back. I really thought I had this weight thing licked back when I lost 110 pounds and totally changed my life. Pregnancy changed it right back, and my son is two but I still don't have it together. I was counting calories and it was working (because it always does) but I was miserable. I'm starting to get really really ANGRY that I have to count calories. I know that doesn't mean I should stop doing it, but I think if I'm ever going to have any kind of happiness I'm going to have to do things differently. I've tried the "intuitive eating" thing before and I just couldn't get it together. I always felt like my intuition was telling me to eat a big bag of Doritos and chase it with about six chocolate chip cookies. Obviously that wasn't my REAL intuition. I've never, my entire life, been seriously in touch with my body. No, I take that back. When I was in decent shape in 2007 and I was taking those nice long 10-mile runs and training for a half marathon, I was in touch with my body. But only during the runs and while I was training. I would come back from a long run and drink chocolate milk because my body wanted it. I didn't care how many calories it had -- it was what my body wanted and needed. It's so rare for me to eat or drink something for the real reason I'm supposed to eat or drink -- for nourishment!

I'm starting to ramble, so I'll cut this short. My new radical plan is simply this: even if it takes me a hundred years, I'm going to get in touch with my body and eat for the right reasons. I'm getting rid of my ticker and all my spreadsheets telling me every little pound I've lost and how far I am from my goal weight. I'm not going to weigh myself until some time in September, and then maybe only once a month after that. This could be a big mistake, or it could be the best thing I've ever done. I kind of feel like I HAVE to do it this way now.

It sounds like you're saying what you really need is a plan that maintains your mental health while allowing weight loss (and maintenance of weight loss!) I think that sounds wonderful.
Calorie counting sent me right off the rails - I know it works for so many people here but it was mental poison for me. I worked out a modified version of Dr. Furman's Eat to Live for my own plan. There's very little counting involved since everything you eat is very healthy. Some things like nuts have limited portions but still, no calorie counting. I love it, it tuned me in to my real hunger (raw veggie time!) versus emotional eating (don't want raw veggies, want junk but there's none in the house, so eat the veggies or get over it another way). It really reinforced the "food is fuel" mindset in a way that calorie counting didn't for me, since you can incorporate junk into a purely calorie-counting plan. If 100% of what you eat is super-high-quality body fuel, it's easier to be intuitive about hunger.
This is just my 0.02 - good luck with your search!

Thank you for your response, Jay!

I've heard of the Furman plan but don't know much about it (which is odd, because I've read and tried pretty much everything out there!) Isn't it a vegetarian plan? If so, that would be fine with me because I'm a vegetarian! What I'm worried about right now is doing anything that feels like a plan. I just want to take some time to get in touch with what my body wants and needs (more needs than wants, but if I deprive myself of things I want I'll go wacko and completely freak out). Counting calories never made me that crazy in the past -- only eliminating something completely from my diet made me nuts (except for meat -- I've had no problem getting rid of that). I'll look into Eat to Live and see if I want to use the information for my nutrition -- I've heard only good things about it.

Lisa

For me - it's a FINE LINE between apathy and obsession. I have spread sheets of goals and historical data, and I weigh myself every day. I count all calories and exercise 6 days a week. I have gone the route of "only weighing once a month" and scrapping the calorie counting because I couldn't handle it anymore. All it does for me is take my focus off the ultimate goal.

The one thing I know - is keeping track of your food and exercising works. It works faster for some than others. Me...I'm lucky to loose a pound a week BUT in this last 12 months I've lost 50lbs. Stay off the scale if it's hard on your sanity, but keep working a reliable plan.

I think you hit the nail on the head when you said you have to get "in touch" with your body again! That's really what this is all about. I used to be in great shape, I ran 4-6 miles a day and felt great. Now, after 3 kids, I'm realizing that I have totally lost touch with myself. I'm tired all the time from carrying about 70 pounds of excess weight and I feel like my life is spiraling out of control. When I weighed 130lbs I wouldn't have ever understood how one's weight could make that happen, but now I do... I think that if you make a concerted effort to do what is best for your body... what's best for the rest of your life will start to come more clearly into focus. Just my opinion but I think you have the right attitude. Sometimes things don't work out the way you want until you get so frustrated you make dramatic changes... sounds like you are on the right path. Good Luck!

I don't count calories. I do exercise. I don't weigh myself every day. I try to make healthier food choices, but indulge once a week or less. I have made progress on my goals, but not as fast as others. I do have my sanity, or at least most of it.