I have a tendency to skip certain bad foods, but then allow myself to eat others. I do this when I'm trying to lose weight, which often results in me losing 3-4 pounds. Then, nothing. For example, I'll eat a dark chocolate bar in the morning because it isn't overly horrible for me calorie wise as well as an orange, then a sandwich in the afternoon but I'll add mayo and cheese...things like that. I always add minor things that won't make me gain horrendous amounts of weight, but will keep me from losing weight.

How do I resist those cravings? How do I keep from doing things like drinking soymilk at night and putting butter on a piece of wheat bread because it "won't kill me."

I'm tired of maintaining my weight, which results me in getting frustrated, and then gaining more weight than I started with. It's a vicious cycle I'd like to be rid of.

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Edit: I just realized that I misspelled the word 'too.' I tend to do that when I am tired. Sorry!

If losing weight is your goal, you need to be conscious of how many calories you consume each day. Even if you're eating only small amounts of those 'bad' foods, if you add all those up, and they could be preventing you from reaching your goal weight. You don't necessarily need to omit these foods from your diet, but just be aware that even small servings contain calories.

For me, even small amounts of junk food triggers bad habits (e.g. overeating, binging, ...). When I decided to lose weight I had to completely change my lifestyle, and the first thing to go was all the junk. I pretty much went cold turkey and stopped eating all the 'bad' stuff (junk food, soda/juice, fatty foods, fast food, high sodium, candy, fried foods, processed foods, ...). The first few weeks were really difficult, but after awhile I stopped craving those foods. Even now, nearly a year later I do want those foods anymore (they don't even taste the same). Just by changing my food I lost a lot of weight, and felt so much healthier.

In my experience, losing a significant amount of weight is a journey that requires a permanent lifestyle change. For me, if I want to keep the weight off I'll never be able to eat the way I used to, but I've found I prefer to eat healthy (it feels so much better). You just need to find the way that will work for you. This forum is a great place for information/support about nearly all diets. Good luck with your journey!

I agree a lot with what Gracie said.

Counting calories is essential to me. It's built in accountability and forced portion control. Once you start counting those calories, wanting to get the most from each and every precious one of them, your choices become much better. I urge you to start keeping a food journal. It's time VERY well spent.

I also find planning in advance the only way to go. Period. Eating healthy won't happen by accident. It has to be thoroughly mapped out and planned for. I always know what I'm eating for the day(s) ahead of time. I make a plan - and I stick to it. No veering. This way the work has been done. I don't have to start making these crucial decisions when I get hungry, in fact I don't GET hungry. I've got my meals/snacks all ready to go. My choices are better this way. I have to plan to have healthy foods or I won't have them. They're not going to magically appear.

How do you resist cravings? Well you DECIDE to do this (lose weight) once and for all and permanently. That's the first step. You decide to do this, you commit to do this and therefore you must be willing to do whatever's necessary to MAKE it happen. You've got to be willing to pass up on A in order to get B. You're an adult. You've got a craving - you deal with it. YOU DON'T HAVE TO GIVE INTO A CRAVING. Nothing terrible will happen to you if you pass up on some calorie laden (or over calorie budget) food. Nothing. It's more than okay to tell yourself no. That craving WILL pass. You want weight loss MORE, don't you? You've got to make your weight loss a PRIORITY. It has to be at the tippy top of your "to do" list. Always. You must be focused on it. Just like anything else that matters in your life. You've got a craving, you *want* something off plan -tough. Find something ELSE. Ride the craving out. You've got to make mature, reasonable, sensible and intelligent choices. Wanting for the sake of wanting is not relevant anymore. You're not a spoiled child. You must keep in mind what you want the most.

For me though, after a couple of difficult weeks, as I was incorporating these new healthy habits into my life, as I was getting accustomed to passing up this and eating that instead, while my cravings were still high, I just stuck with it - no matter what. I WORKED PAST THE INITIAL DISCOMFORT STAGE - and then my cravings GREATLY, if not totally diminished. It was nothing short of miraculous.

Like Gracie, I knew that I overate certain foods. I was done doing *this* the same way again and again and again, yet expecting a different result. No. How many times did I see this just wasn't going to work? So this time I did it differently. I banned many foods. Made them definite no's. That was the only way for me. The foods that I couldn't (or wouldn't) stop with once I got started - had to not be STARTED in the first place. This was there was no OVEReating them. It wasn't restrictive at all to me - it was freeing. I hated the feeling that certain foods held over me. Once I made them definite no's, they were no longer an option, they no longer called out to me.

I got rid of lots of food, cold turkey initially, but I therefore added in MUCH tastier, healthier and better for me foods. Got rid of this - but added in that! No deprivation. The deprivation comes from eating "those" foods and remaining fat.

Bottom line is it, really is a lifestyle change. For me it was a lifestyle overhaul. You want to be a trim, fit, slim, health minded person - than you've got to actually BE it. Take the steps required to get there. Read my signature in fact. You won't regret it a bit.

Stop the vicious cycle. Stop dieting and instead change your habits. Decide to "do this". And hang on. It's the most thrilling, fascinating, exciting, wonderful thing that you can imagine. Adhering to a healthy lifestyle is no burden, no hardship. It's a pleasure, a joy and a blessing. Give it some time and you'll see for yourself exactly what I mean. I'm certain of it.

This might help you break that habit. Don't tell yourself, "This won't kill me" or "It's not too bad." Instead say, "Everything counts."

That's how it is inside your body. Do you think your body didn't notice that mayonnaise? That dark chocolate bar?

Calorie counting is one way of making sure you stay on top of this. Most weight loss plans involve limiting certain favorite foods in some way. That may not mean never having them, but it certainly doesn't mean "whenever I feel like it."

Just remember to count whatever you eat.

Jay

This.

I mean, it really isn't too bad, is it? It's maintenance, and that's not too shabby . But ... maintenance isn't losing, either.

Jay really put it neatly and concisely. That's EXACTLY it. EVERYTHING counts and EVERYTHING MATTERS. Always. Your body is keeping an accurate journal even if you're not.

Wow...that is a poster in the making!

EVERYTHING counts.
EVERYTHING MATTERS.
Always.

Wow!

See Jay, look what you started . and at the same time -

That is EXACTLY it!!

I just want to add that I used the strategy of "not counting" things for YEARS...

You know where it got me? To 295 pounds.

When I think back on it, it was SO SILLY. WHAT was I thinking...?

The stuff I picked out of the pan after dinner was over, the stuff nobody saw me eat, the cake with frosting that I ate one bite at a time all day instead of settling down with a piece and enjoying it. Basically, I gave myself a pass on all that stuff because somehow I had convinced myself that it didn't count.

In the end, I had to do what Robin and Gracie said. I had to cut ALL of it out, and ride out the cravings, and then learn a whole new way to eat.

Frankly, it's much easier than spending all day every day strategizing every bite. Now it's simpler and it takes less of my time.

I read something in the book Overcoming Overeating, by David Kessler, which I highly recommend. He said that regarding food cravings, there is moment of vulnerability, where you fall into this "will I or won't I" mindset. "Should I eat it or not..."

He said, if you've gotten to that point, he said the craving becomes incredibly powerful and hard to resist. That's why the strategy of DECIDING what not to eat, and making a a firm rule seems to work well for a lot of people. Because if you enter into that self-negotiation you're always going to lose.

The good news is that learning how NOT to do it is easier than it might seem.

Yes, I've said this SO many times. Making them definite NO's, making those rules, deciding IN ADVANCE NOT to eat certain items, took away the decision making process, that "should I, shouldn't I" equation that ALWAYS led to disaster.

Oh and as far as the everything count/everything matters thing - this was one rule that's really helped with that one - NEVER EAT WHILE STANDING. It's a biggie. I've recently eased up on this one - mistakenly. It's time for me to bring that one back in and never let it go. Unbelievable how those calories can add up through picking. You can graze yourself fat - and for what? You don't even realize that you're doing it, that you're eating. NEVER EAT WHILE STANDING. Because everything counts and everything matter. Always.

I'd never thought about it that way...that my body is keeping an accurate journal even if I'm not.

I realize that I've had two very bad habits- one, doing the whole "bite here and a bite there" things, which is bad enough in itself. But I realized that if I go over my calories for the day, I just don't add it to my count for the day. I just say "Oh, I've gone over" and stop eating, but I don't keep myself accountable for what's already gone in. I know that it's because I'm to afraid to see the damage I've done.

But my body already sees the damage. And how can my mind be on board if I won't let myself see what I've really done?

I'm not really sure how to respond, because I think this is all really good advice. =) I think "everything counts and everything matters" is a great mantra.

What are so of the major foods that you all have decided to cut out?

Also, I've kept food journals before, but I'm not sure how I'm going to keep calories. I'm a college student and I've gotten a scholarship that pays for me to eat in the cafeteria. I've tried going online to look up the nutritional information...and sometimes they have it. But at other times, it's either not there at all, or it tells you that there are so many calories in a serving, but doesn't actually tell you what a serving size is. How do I keep the calories for that?

I'm going to go for a jog now. Motivation, motivation, motivation.

There is nothing that I have decided to cut out, but everything does get judged on "is it worth it?"

Is 42 calories worth it for my after lunch chocolate? Only if it is of high quality and is dark chocolate. Is 42 calories worth it to put mayo on my sandwich? No, not really, I dont really mind if it isnt there most of the time, unless I have perfectly ripe tomatoes in which case mayo is a must - so a couple times a year. Is 42 calories worth it for the bite of mac n cheese left on my kids plate that I swiped before putting her plate in the dishwasher? No.

If I did make a "cut out" list it would be situations (like no eating while standing, no swiping a cracker from the box before you put it away, no swiping from the kids plates etc. ) not foods. Other foods are evaluated on their merit. Some foods might not make the cut ever, but then it is because I have decided I would RATHER have something else, not that I have FORBIDDEN myself to have them.

FitDay is a good site for tracking calories. You can look up foods, and you can see calorie amounts for ounces, cups, pieces, slices... all depending on the food. It keeps track for you--you just have to enter the foods and amounts to the best of your ability. If you purchase the downloaded version you can customize your database with foods you often eat that aren't listed precisely.

No food is really off limits to me totally--but some foods can't live here.

Ice cream is a food that I don't keep in the house, but I will sometimes eat outside the house. It has to be good ice cream, too. I've gotten really picky about what is good enough to justify the calories.

For awhile I could not have Doritos in the house. After awhile I could buy a large bag and divide it up into 1-ounce servings using individual sandwich bags. That helped me control the intake.

Nuts are a hard food for me. They are in my house, and sometimes I have a problem with them. But I don't live alone--my SO likes them and has no problem. So... if I'm going to have some nuts, I count them out. Sounds a bit OCD, but not paying attention to how many nuts I was eating sure did help me gain weight...

Oh--I don't drink alcohol. That's been true since long before I became obese, so no problem there.

I'm allergic to clams and other mollusks, so no choice about that!

Jay

I was done being fat, super morbidly obese in fact, and was not going to take any more chances. I had tried the moderation route many, many times. It didn't work for me. I NEEDED TO SET MYSELF UP FOR SUCCESS. I needed my choices limited. If I had trouble overeating certain foods - well those were the ones that I needed eliminate. For me, that mean all sugar-y, flour-y foods.

It may seem drastic to some, but I NEEDED some drastic changes. My life was on the line after all. If you want extraordinary results, you must take extraordinary measures. That is my belief.

You need to assess for yourself which are you trigger foods, which foods cause you to have that shovel in your mouth feeling and do away with those.

Just last weekend, I had a splurge evening. It was my daughters' engagement party and I ate cookies, cake and what not. And this past week has been one of my worst ever since changing my lifestyle. So even though my trigger foods are not in my house, I've got that "looking to eat everything in sight" feeling going on. That's what happens to me when I eat sugar. Although I had been able to keep it in check - until this past week. So for me, it's time to re-assses. Once an addict, always an addict.

You've got to find your own way, decide what you think would and would not work for you, do some experimenting and be open to tweak things as need be.

As for your calorie counts in school, I would take Jay's fitday.com advice.