I want to eat an indefinite amount of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. I want to buy a bag, and dive in. I imagine I would eat the whole bag (it's happened before). I don't just want one. That would not curb this kind of craving. I'm craving as many as I can stuff into my mouth. Not just the taste, but the fullness.

I want to fit into an old pair of pants that are waiting for me in my dresser. I want to fit into old shirts and sweaters that are waiting for me in a storage bin in my closet. Easily accessible.

So how do I reconcile these two desires? It's not possible. So I have to go through my day and hope and pray that the desire to eat innumerable amounts of Peanut Butter Cups doesn't take over the desire to wear old clothes. I think that this is why this is so hard-conflicting desires. I can't have both. Not in the way that I want them.

Just wanted to let you know that I'm struggling with the same feelings. I want to stand in front of the cookie jar and eat every single one of them in there. But I also want my measurements to go down the next time I weigh-in with my trainer. Both cannot happen. It feels like two different personalities inside my head. One saying, "Eat the freaking cookies!" and the other saying, "Stay on plan, the rewards are better!"

I don't have any advice or an answer. I just wanted to say you're not the only one with those feelings! And I'm giving you virtual support! You absolutely can fight off the PB cup desire -- I know it because I can fight off the cookie desire!

Thanks! I know you can do it too! Sometimes I think you need someone else to believe in you before you can believe in yourself...I appreciate the support.

I want to eat a whole bag of Cheetos, my biggest weakness! Sometimes I cave in, sometimes I don't. As long as the times I don't outnumber the times I do I consider myself on the right path. I'm not looking to be perfect - I'm looking to get consistently better. I'm not a saint, but I'm not a martyr either. Sometimes instant gratification wins over slow results.... we're human don't beat yourself over it.

I feel like a hypocrite giving advice, but SOMETIMES I feel like I get it right.

It really helps me to think about how I am feeling when I am craving something. Just take the time to notice the feeling: sad, lonely, whatever. This doesn't mean I don't still binge, but sometimes I don't. Don't think that it will stop you, don't do it because you think it might, just do it. Awareness is the first step.

The other thing I try to do is to really enjoy every bite when I binge. It is weird, but even the most rich food doesn't seem to have much taste after the first few bites. sometimes if I am aware of the taste and then the lack there of, it helps me stop. If I am no longer enjoying the blissful taste and experience, why am I continuing?

I hope this helps. Like I said--I feel like the blind leading the blind, but maybe we can all get there together...

My roommate recently bought these amazing oatmeal peanutbutter sandwhich cookie things.... she convinced me to try justttt one, which turned into two.

That was two days ago and they're still all I can think about. I keep having visions of myself, frothing at the mouth like a rabid dog, trying insanely to break into her bedroom just to eat those stupid cookies....

I don't think junkfood and me will ever peacefully coexist. It's all or nothing for me unfortunately .

But really, what will I get if I give in and eat that junk food? I'll have the momentary satisfaction that I get while I eat it. And then when I look down and see the empty box I'll realize that I consumed the entire bloody thing the guilt will set in. And then I'll feel weak, like I have no self control.

OR I can resist temptation and feel proud that I was strong enough, and had enough self control. And then one day soon I'll fit into my skinny jeans, and something tells me those peanut butter cookies will never taste as good as fitting into those jeans will feel!!

We can doooo this

I go through the same things, and sadly, when the - ice cream, it is for me - craving hits it overrides the desire to be slim and wear nice clothes

It totally is the blind leading the blind! thanks for the advice and support, everyone! I have actually tried to identify feelings before a binge--there don't seem to be any there. Maybe that's the issue? No feelings? I don't know. Anyway, I'm safe for today (although I suppose I shouldn't speak too soon). But I had to go to the grocery store to pick up some coffee, and I was really hungry while I was there, which we all know ups the danger zone! But I didn't buy anything unplanned, so that's good.

I want to just keep eating everything in the house until I have a place to live next month, a job so I can support my daughter and just generally stop hating myself. sigh. ok sorry kinda down. I feel down overwhelmed right now - even to sad to eat the stupid cupcakes with the ugly blue icing in the pantry. Really binged yesterday and haven't quite recovered emotionally. Full though, gonna have some diet soda and sit on the couch and reflect.

Thanks for this thread - my skinny jeans that i no longer fit in are stuffed into the back of my dresser but this made me remember how much I want to be able to zip them up again, and how my binges are making that desire impossible.

I'm glad it helped whispers! It helped me too. I thought of you guys and the thread while I was at the store yesterday, not buying peanut butter cups.

I don't understand people that are perfectly happy eating just one (insert yummy food here). I just don't get it. Why would you only want one of something so delicious? Whats wrong with you?!?!

Actually I have noticed the phenomenon that KarenLee mentioned. 1st bite of a rich dessert, extraordinary, 2nd bite wonderful, 3rd bite great, 4th bite good, 5th bite OK and so on. So I call it my 2 bite rule--after that it all goes downhill.

I can so relate to this problem. I know it doesn't taste as good several bites in as the first couple bites. It's as if we think if we keep eating it we'll get back to that first orgasmic bliss of those first bites. Even when we are stuffed to the gills.

I have to constantly fight with myself with this duel personality everytime I go to the store-
it's on sale, I should get it today.
Why, you'll just eat it. You don't need the calories.
but it will taste so good
you don't need it, it will just attach to your hips

If I'm good I can leave the store without a bag or two. If I'm not then I have to fight the temptations until it's all gone.

Does it make you feel better that at least you aren't alone in this? It does for me.

Sarah in MD

I had the same thoughts today but about a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos lol. I'm going on my third week without a binge and I'm paying close attention to not eating the foods that trigger me to eat more and more. I truly feel like I'm addicted to the bad chemicals and crap that go into snacks and junk food. As I stay away from them their pull on me becomes less and less but like a freakin' drug addict I do occasionally have dreams about donuts and stuff and I feel cravings for it sometimes. It's sick and frightening how hooked I can be on food but I've decided to take it one day at a time and just laugh as much as I can because seriously, DONUT DREAMS?!

My new plan to fake it until I make it. I am asking myself "what would a normal person do?" Normal people don't obsess about food like I have been doing.

I wonder: do normal people have a nearly orgasmic experience of that first few bites? Do you think us bingers just get TOO much of a rush from it? Not that we shouldn't enjoy food, but I really act like addict---I get all excited, I feel totally euphoric (sp?) and get totally pumped before I even have the first bite! I have food fantasies, I daydream about what I could pig out on as soon as I am alone.

I get such a rush like I have a wonderful secret and it is all mine mine mine!!

Crazy, huh?
KL