My brain has totally fritzed out.

Monday to Thursday next week my mother's coming to stay.

1 day we'll have lunch and dinner at home.
2 days we'll have just dinner.
The last day will be lunch at a mall, I'll be on my own again for dinner.

I do not, upon any circumstances, discuss my food, my body, my diet with her. Delightful lady, very fond of her but if she gets wind of my weightloss, she will never, ever shut up about it, every phone call she'll be asking and asking me, trying to make every last bit of me hers. Yea, I have issues....... nope, can't quite go there tonight.

Anyway, I'm struggling to think of food to have in for her.
Breakfast's ok, I can have my oats, she's happy with toast.

The other meals:
She can't eat anything with too much veggies in, because of her very old digestion.
She can't eat too much at a time, for the same reason.

I generally eat tons of veggies but happy not to force them on her.
I'm not eating dairy or bread at the moment, I find my fluid retention problem is better if I don't.

I'm calorie counting, up to about 1500 a day but choose not to eat processed carbs, too much fat, sugar, dairy or red meat.

Like I say, my brain has fritzed, I don't want her to eat food that will disagree with her; I don't want to be open about my dieting; I don't want to blow my diet.

Ye wonderworkers - can anyone help me with some dishes? I always cook from scratch, I'm happy with anything you could suggest.

Thankyou.

Meal ideas --
1. Lunch -- soup and sandwich: you can make a nice soup with beans in it for you both, and offer up cut up sandwiches on a plate at the same time. You don't have to have any and she can have what she likes.
2. Dinner 1 -- vegetarian chili, made with kidney beans tomatoes and seasonings. Not too spicy! Well cooked for her digestion. If kidney beans are too indigestible, try brown lentils instead. Offer her toast on the side.
3. Dinner 2 -- roast chicken and mashed potatoes and veggies; well cooked veggies. No gravy. Healthy mashed potatoes made with yogort or skim milk (just a bit) to loosen them up. OR baked potatoes. You can put salsa on yours for a tasty fat-free alternative to butter.
4. Dinner 3 -- baked fish in a parchment paper pouch, with veggies baked in the same pouch. Brown rice on the side, or couscous with veggies in it.
5. Watch out for calorie bombs at the mall!
Desserts: fruit salads, home-made rice pudding made with sweetner/no-fat milk (for her)
If you break down the meals and serve things separately i.e. chicken plus veg plus potatoes, you can pick and choose what you can eat, and so can she.
Good luck!
Kira

Kiramira.. you nailed this one!
I had no idea how to help but you have wonderful ideas.
Ailidh, i understand not sharing. It's ok to keep this to yourself. Enjoy your time with Mom

remember you can always tell a white lie. if you feel self-conscious eating your regular food. eg. i am cutting out certain foods because i am having 'digestion' problems at the suggestion of naturopath/m.d., etc.

I've SO been there! The key is to cook healthily without announcing a dietary plan! Cooking techniques, choices, and breaking things down let everyone eat happily without making an announcement to the world.
Kira

Lunches: homemade soup (turkey with veggies, chicken and brown rice)
quick stir fry with chicken breast and minimal veggies for her, extra for you
scrambled eggs with low carb wraps and fruit
fruit salad and yogurt

Dinners: baked chicken breasts, veggie side, baked potato
chili with beans and ground chicken, toast on the side
tuna melts and home fries with veggie side...

Hmmm... that's about all I got right now

I'm sitting here working on an outline for my book and I should have tons of ideas for you but many have already been suggested.

I just have one suggestion, enjoy the time with her. cherish every moment. I am missing my mother horribly right now. I did not think that writing a healthy cookbook would bring back such grief, but food and family traditions are really tied together.....can't write more...eyes are leaking

Enjoy your visit

Another vote for soups/stews....

Have you considered asking your mum what she would like to eat?

"Oh, just anything you like dear. I don't want to be trouble....."

Grrrrrrrr! I do not like when folks do that to me! Must be frustrating!

Ommlettes, made separately. Toss thousands of vege's into yours, and whatever she wants into hers.

Thanks for all the good ideas, and Couch - you must've known I'm just about to set off to fetch her!

You've had many great suggestions and I have nothing to add on that front. But, I do recommend just acting like it's no big deal to eat healthy. And, if she asks, you can tell here that it's cheaper to prepare and eat healthier whole foods than to buy the processed foods. Let her think it's mostly about economics and not weight loss.

I miss my Mom, too.

I miss my Mom tremendously.

Ailidh - Your post reminded me of daily meals with Mom. Our foods were polar opposites. Hers was lots of carbs and sweet things with few veggies/mine was few carbs and lots of veggies. Her portions were extremely small and my veggie portions were huge. She was also on coumadin so that posed further restrictions veggie-wise.

What worked for me was as Kira suggested: meats/poultry/fish with separate sides. Beans/lentils did not agree with her tummy. I found zucchini (made in one of those zip n steam bags) to be one of the best veggies for her digestive system.

Sandwiches at lunch worked (deli chick/turkey breast or ham). I had mine on a whole wheat pita and she had hers on her favorite scala (white) bread. Thinly sliced tomatoes and lettuce leaves on the side to put in the sandwich (I would put a lot in mine).

Dinner was usually baked chicken/fish or grilled on the Foreman chicken breasts, boneless pork chops, fish with some kind of veggie and sometimes a salad. Get her favorite salad dressing (probably NOT diet).

Good luck and enjoy your visit.

Thankyou for all your great suggestions.
The week went well.
Every day we ate out at lunch, and I had plain meat or a jacket potato and salad. Some days she joined me, other days she had deep fried scampi and fries. Hey, she's made it to 88.5.
At home we had
one dinner of lean meat and salad. I added some Brie to her plate and said it was 'a protein platter'. I passed on the Brie and had a ton more salad.
one dinner it was smoked haddock in milk. An old family favourite. Hers was in milk with butter and brown bread; mine was in soy milk with loads of peas and corn.
one dinner was chicken in ultra light mayo on home made flatbread
one dinner was pasta with the remaining cold meats and a few veggies stirred in.

The good news is that, not only were the meals fine and my diet went undetected (she didn't notice the 30lbs lost since I last saw her, is that good or bad lol?!) but, because I'd come across the phrase 'martyr mommy' a few weeks ago, I think it may have been on 3fc somewhere, I was able to really stand outside her constant, gentle, self-effacing martyr murmurings, rather than feel guilty about them, as I have usually done for 50+ years. So we had a really good week! yay!