Morning ladies,

I never did make it back in to post again. I spent a lot of time yesterday at the computer. I got started on a Shutterfly photobook because I have wanted to do one for quite some time and my time was running out on a free book. It took several hours but I am excited to see the final product. Very fun!

I did spent time out in the barn yesterday. Time for the spring cleaning and reorganization. I took three dogs out with me and they had a blast. They were very good girls in that they run and played but did not run off or go down towards the road. Poor Dukie though; he was in the back yard and he wanted to be out with the girls too. But can't trust him not to get into trouble yet.

About the discussion about perimenopause. My doctor told me a few years ago that perimeno can last up to 10 years. She specializes in studying the effects of menopause. She said it usually starts with the gain of a few pounds that seems to come from nowhere (i.e. weight gain when you're eating as you had done before the gain); it goes to belly fat; and your cholesterol goes up. I've had all three of those. She also said that a low/good carb diet with lots of veggies, whole grains and lean proteins is the best way to fight the weight gain and the belly fat. But I was not pleased to hear that I had perimenopause especially when I don't think I'm old enough for that!

I'm going to post this now as my computer is acting wonky. I promise I will do replies!

to all!

Back for replies:

Carol - Our relatives probably know each other! I am so glad to see that your foot is on the mend and you are able to exercise. Trolly run here we come!

Georgia - Hope your visit with your parents is tolerable. Good luck with house hunting. You have a great attitude! I love cobb salads!

Debi - Are you feeling better still today? Hope so. Graduation sounds like a good milestone goal!

Barb - You've been having a hard time with the youngin's and sleep. Poor things! I have trouble with the dogs so I'm of no help for kids! I am so excited for you to be so close to your big milestone. While working on my photobook, I found pictures of our little gathering in Oklahoma several years ago. You have changed a lot!

That's it for now. Later.........

Hello all...just a quick drop in!

I hate to admit, I'm still in a funk. Used my "no-weigh" pass Saturday, although I did weigh - just didn't record it - and I was up 4 lbs. I knew I would be up and was all determined to get back on track and have it off for WI this weekend. Instead, we went to dinner after a ton of frustrating shopping and doing yard work and ate WAY more than I should have. Then Sunday was a baby shower at the in-laws and, you guessed it, more of the same. I've just been out of control all weekend and I'm unhappy with myself. This does not improve my mood - so why the heck do I do it!?!

Anyway, trying again. Of course, I have to eat out again tonight. And no, I don't have a choice, but I'm minding my p's and q's today and will have the grilled chicken on pita tonight and water - no beer! (My group will be ordering a pitcher - I will abstain!)

Nothing else to report.

Oh! gramie asked how old I am...45...and yes..it is old enough for at least perimenopause, but I refuse to admit it!

Gotta run everyone.

Mornin' !
Results are in!

Hello my girlies, thought I had better drop in here before you all forget who I am. LOL!

Weight is in a holding pattern right now. I did drop the seven lbs, but have just maintained since then.. I really should go and make a new ticker. I haven't had one since they took our old ones off. To lazy to mess with it.

Well ladies, I had my last period when I was 48, it never did bother me too much except for the hot flashes. I would whip that cover on and off me a zillion times at night. My Dh would cover me up and tuck the cover in when he found me uncovered. I told him to stop doing that and he said I would take cold if not, No way. Anybody that hot can't possibly take a cold! LOL!

I know I have missed welcoming some of our newbies, sorry about that. Welcome to our thread. I read more than I post lately.

Now to catch you up with the morgellon story. My relative has not found anyone yet to help her get rid of these things. You would not believe what a bunch of inconsiderate boobs are in the medical profession. (sorry, don't mean to offend anyone here). they treat her as if she is totally crazy instead of coming up with a real sloution. they have as much as told her it is all in her head. You can see the places on her that are like bites and sores from these things, are they blind or just stupid. there must be an answer to this problem. I just keep praying that someone will discover what they are and where they come from. I call them super bugs, although I am not sure if you could classify them as a bug or some kind of worm. EWWW! TMI. Sorry!

I will try to get in here more often, but right now it is hard to keep all of the balls in the air. My main concern is for this elderly lady that is such a wonderful Christain woman. I see her suffering and it breaks my heart. She was always such a joy to be around and I can see her spirit being broken. If you pray please say a small one for her.

Until later, Ruth

I am feeling fine today. Sure didnt like that bug!!!!
Not alot going on here today...got the bed stripped and back together. Tuna salad made for hubby and going to start dinner soon.I am totally OP today!! Feels good and I plan on walking after dinner even if it is cool. I will just bundle up.
teri- you are studying for the CPA exam right? May I ask which way you are doing the review.My daughter is leaning towards the book and self displine version. She doesnt want to go to class and drive 4 hours each way every weekend. She doesnt think she would do the online version to well so its the old fashion way book and paper. I told her to take a month or 6 weeks before she hits it. Do you actually study 25 hours a week?? She said that is what they suggest.
Heather- i will record my mins and i WILL be exercising!!

Ruth_ that illness sounds horrible..i did some reading on it.

lilion _ i was up 4lbs on sat and it sucks!! I think facing it was good for me!! I hope you get feeling better fast!!

carol_ hi and hope your having a great day!!

penny_ hi girl I missed my pm this morning!

barb_ how are you? hope you didnt get the bug!

All this menopause talk - I had not one symptom except my periods stopping. About a year after that I got kinda teary for a few months - a little pill helped for the time. I was 44 - my doc had already told me it would be early for me since I wasn't able to have children. I hope you all fly right through it too.

I'm back. Like trouble that won't go away.

I FINALLY made it to the fitness center. Sheesh, it feels like forever since I was there what with the dog walking and all. I did 15 minutes on the treadmill, 20 minutes on the elliptical and a few of the weight machines. I felt great.

DH had a wonderful dinner ready of turkey kielbasa and sauerkraut. YUM-O! We haven't had that in a long time. Paired with a salad and it was a very filling meal.

Debi - Good to see that you're feeling better. I've heard of a couple people having the type A influenza. Doesn't sound pretty. I am doing the book and self-study route for the CPA exam. I couldn't do the sitting in class every night and then all day on the weekends for a Becker review course. I bought a new set of study materials by Wiley and then bought Bisk and Becker used sets on Ebay. I also got the Wiley software to help with study questions. If I study a hour in the morning, an hour at lunch, and then an hour at night, plus a little more on the weekends, yep I'm getting in about 25 hours of study. I haven't been that diligent all the time but I will be now that I'm to within a month of my next exam. Its CRAM time! Nothing like added stress.

Carol - I take a little pill to help with some of the menopause emotions. Or maybe its so I'll just look at DH and walk away when he's being an idiot. Wonder which excuse came first?

Ruth - You are an amazing woman. And we miss you when you're quiet.

Lilion - Maybe you need more spring weather to get out of your funk. Or is it because of work overload? Maybe a smack or two? Snap out of it girl and get that scale headed back in the direction you want. Have you been doing the IM?

Angela - How was your day today? Get things worked out with your mom?

Annieoh - Gosh, I didn't welcome you to the group! Welcome! Sorry about that. Great job on joining the Y and getting in your workouts. Sorry to hear about your job and having to look for another one. That is happening so much these days. What kind of work do you do?

Sue - Have you started your new job yet? Or is it on 3/16 that you start?

I hear thunder rumbling in the distance. I think I am caught up on replies so I better get this posted before I lose it. (And get back to studying! )

teri_ is the wiley as expensive as the becker?? i about fell over when she told me how expensive it is!!! I didnt think you could buy used..because of changing laws?? I will mention it to her.
I can truly say tonight is the 1st time in a few weeks i am going to bed hungry. I even had a night time snack,calories are a perfect 1300. I am taking my drs advice and trying a lower number and see if i can jumpstart my weight loss again. I had been doing 14-1500 since jan last year. I have noticed my puffiness seems to be gone tonight.
hugs to all im heading to bed!!

Hi Ladies!

I had full intentions of getting back last night to catch up but as usual time got away from me. Now I am laying in bed with the laptop watching (video baby monitor) my son jump in and out of his bed. I think he's about tuckered out..he's covering himself up with his blankets. Yep...still having sleep issues around here. We are in a rough phase cause if he doesn't get a nap he's grouchy and goes to sleep easily...but if he naps he's not as grouchy but then won't go to bed...which makes me grouch. So either way someone is grouchy. I keep telling myself it's a phase that will pass.

Terri - YAY for the fitness center workout and YAY to DH for making a nice, healthy dinner. When I arrived home tonight after working my butt off at the gym for nearly 2 hours DH had Mac n Cheese with bacon and breadsticks from Pizza Hut! I made a healthy taco salad.

DG - I avoided the tummy bug..thankfully. I don't know about you, but I kinda like feeling a little hungry at bedtime. I'm sitting here thinking I'm hungry but also telling myself I've had plenty and my bod can just let go of more fat. Hopefully changing things up a tad will help you out.

Lilion - That's a good question...WHY do you do it!?!? Only you can answer it....I know you are strong and you can and will do this. You can make those healthy choiced and still have a good time! Yes...you can.

Ruth - Heya! Good to see you! Good job on the loss and maintaining...it's much better than gaining..right!? I sure do hope they find someone to help your relative!

Carol - My doc warned me I'm a likely candidate for early menopause as well...due to my reproductive challenges. I'm just 38 so I guess I have a few years. I wasn't sure what he meant by "early". I'm so glad I was able to give you a little inspiration to get your w/o in the other day. Anytime you have trouble getting motivated just think of me there rooting you on!

HELLO to everyone else! I'm being lazy and not going to back to the last thread...I read it all but don't have the energy to reply to it all. I still luv ya'll!

G'night.

I sit here again and Barb, I've been asking myself the question again. WHY do I eat stuff that's bad for me when I have choices? I wish I knew, I really do. The fact is, I hit points where I don't care - at the time - but then later I feel awful about it, so I do care! But then feeling bad about it makes me discouraged and then I don't care again. I know lots of people do this. Years ago, I'd have said about someone doing like I've been doing, "Get your head out of whatever body part it's stuck up and get in gear woman!" But I say that to myself - I really do - and yet I screw up again.

I did better tonight. I didn't have the chicken pita, I had Souvlaki and a small greek salad and substuted veggies for the fries. I should have skipped the pita bread, but I didn't. I should have skipped the beer - but I only had one and frankly ladies, I needed a drink.

I plan - really - on getting up and getting on the Infernal Machine. Terri, I skipped it last week, but had been doing it before. I figure that's key to getting back on track.

I know I'm whining...I'm just in such a funk and I really want to get out of it. I go from feeling pretty okay to yelling at my kid to being so tense I think I'm going to scream to teary to fine again. But mostly I'm just kind of tense and blue...just in a rotten mood. My DH has always thought I was...not "high-strung" exactly...but "easily excitable" and kind of moody. Personally, I always thought I was pretty easy going...so clearly he doesn't know what he's talking about. But this long-term witchy mood just really isn't the norm for me. I want to sit and eat cookies and watch Lifetime movies until my brain dribbles out of my head. Then run away from home. Without my brain.

Okay...that sounds worse than it is...I'm just in a funk. Guess I need to kick my own butt and get over it, huh?

Ruth! Glad to see you back! I feel so sorry for your friend. When I looked up that condition it did say on a number of sites that many doctors don't recognise it as a real illness and think it's psychosomatic. How sad for your friend! I hope she finds someone to listen and help her.

Gotta run...it's late and I should try to get some sleep. Maybe a good work-out - provided I get my butt out of bed in time - will improve my mood.

Okay, I'm back again. After this, I am going to bed.

Lilion - Yes, dear, you have to drag yourself out of this funk and not let it drag you down even more. I did that to myself last week (or maybe longer) where I let my self-esteem become a puddle on the floor. You're the one doing it to yourself as I was the one who took myself down that road of misery. And I don't know why I do that either. Maybe I will never have the answer and I'm not sure I care to know why. As long as I don't let myself do that again.

My boss gave me an analogy that was kind of right on. She said that my hanging on to all the anxiety of what could happen was holding me back and hurting me - its like an old couple that goes to live in Miami because they want to live there so badly but when they get there, they think that the crime is so bad that they just stay inside all the time. There they are living what they wanted but they aren't living.

I've sucked my self-esteem back up off the floor and you can kick the funk the **** out of your way!

Debi - Wiley is very reasonably priced compared to Becker. My theory is that I used Wiley only for the audit section and I scored a 60 and needed 75. I count that as pretty darn close considering how long its been since I studied auditing. So, if I could get that close with Wiley, then I figured getting used Becker and Bisk would help be a boost.

BarbPA - So are you watching him on your laptop? LOL. Not to insult your DH but that dinner didn't even sound good. Hmm, seems like he's ****-bent on defying your efforts. that one day, he'll figure it out and want to do better for himself. Or you get tired and hit him with a board.

Okay, the dogs are snoozing and I'm off to bed. We're having a thunderstorm so they better sleep all night.

Confession time for me...

I'm at Starbucks right now (no Internet at my parents' home, all known as The Dark Ages). I had lovely vegetables for lunch and dinner today, lean ground turkey, etc. My parents have always eaten healthfully (obsessively so, but that's a tale for another day), so I knew I'd be supported with meal choices at their place. But here I am at Starbucks, after having breezed through McDonalds for a Quarter Pounder with cheese, and now have a Starbucks nonfat Grande Capuccino and a slice of their Lemon Poundcake. Why did I make my choices? Because when I'm on approach, there's nothing that will stop me from what I'm intent on having, but the moment I've demolished all that, I regret my choices.

I bought the burger and the pound cake because I was angry, because I was having a perfectly lovely time with my mother today (that's rare!) and she reminded me that my 25th anniversary is this month, but she doesn't know I'm being forced to get a divorce. I ate it because I haven't been sleeping well for the past two weeks and I'm exhausted and don't think clearly when I'm tired and I eat to get more energy. I chose the burger because I was feeling empty inside and lonely and wanted the feeling to go away, because it's too overwhelming to remain in that state.

I'm worried about having to move near my parents. There's tons of fast food around here. I don't feel equipped at times to face my mindless choices. Somehow I'm going to get through all this current drama and I know I'm going to be okay, but I don't want to continue to weigh 300+ lbs through it all.

My new little GoWearFit device tells me that without exercise I burn an average of 2600 calories every day. I usually eat between 1800 and 2100 calories. (Today was an anomaly; I ate 2155 calories.) My weekly calorie deficit that's indicated should be leading me to a 1 lb/wk loss, but I'm just not losing weight, and haven't for quite some time. I exercise, regularly. I should be losing more.

I'm frustrated, but still determined to find out what's going on. Maybe I'm not eating enough. I don't know. It's time to talk to my doctor again, or an endocrinologist.

Okay, that's enough moping! I have things to do! There are some really cute houses available in town. I can't believe I'm moving back to my hometown. It has never been on my list of things to do. We'll see how things go. I've lived overseas for the last 11 years. It'll be an adventure to see how I can fit into my original community again.

Georgia

My blog: http://half-the-woman.blogspot.com/

First and foremost -

Georgia I've read a few of your other posts elsewhere and see how much you are going thru. I'm a bit embarassed to be in such a funk myself - I'm quite sure I wouldn't be handling your current challenges as well as you. It's quite impressive the way you analyzed your feelings and why you made the choices you did - even if you did do so while eating pound cake. It does sound like you should be losing, given your calories and exercise, and perhaps you've hit a plateau - horrible things. I hope you find a great little house!

Terri Thanks for the much-needed . I'm quite aware I need to get out of this funk and I'm the only one who can do it. I actually am thinking I may need a good physical. I'm just dragging lately. Between not sleeping well, the overwhelming work-load that I just can't seem to get a hold of, and being sick a week ago, which I'm not sure I'm over yet...I'm still just exhausted, as is my husband...the lovely menopause epiphany, and just being plain old TIRED of this ridiculous Missouri weather, I'm just in the dumps. I think you were right a couple of posts ago - I need spring already! ~Today it's 70, tomorrow 30, it's a wonder half the people in the state aren't sick~

I didn't work out today. I didn't get up on time. I have to be up no later than 5:45 in order to get on the IM, but it was every bit of 6 and then I was so tired I nearly fell asleep drinking my coffee. DH did fall asleep and I made him go back to bed - the exhaustion isn't just me. So I just did some good stretches and got in the shower. The stretches were more than I had done for a bit. I'll try again later to WO.

I do have healthy food for today and I'll at least work on that!

And now...back to the backlog.