Today is a bad day for me. I staid home and ate. It's only 11 and already I've stuffed my face and I'm not even going to try to stop.

Good Morning,

Its a lovely morning so far, at least there's some blue in the sky.

Sassy ohhh the first day back is a killer..... but once your there it gets better.

Spoz I hate days like that.... do you think TOM is coming and that could be the trigger?

Nothing new from me... just plodding along

Have a great day ladies

SO SO TIRED...i should stay up but my head is hurting and i really want to lay back down!!! ok lata

Monday *bleh

LOL.. did I mention I don't like weekends ending? I'm sure I'm not the only one.

I spent the entire weekend cooking.. made two kinds of chicken (one in crockpot, one marinated), a huge pot of brown rice, barley-mushroom soup, and then weighed and portioned it all out... all tucked in the freezer now. Got groceries, did all the laundry, cleared out some more clothes that don't fit anymore, watched a movie & played on here a bit. Also heard from a very very dear friend last night... who is not doing so well (been in hospital for 7 weeks with pneumonia - he has pancreatic cancer). I was relieved to hear from him. He had access to a computer & chatted with hub and I for a bit.

Off to work for me. Keep at it, everyone! One day at a time... even one hour at a time, if need be. For an hour we are in control.

*hugs to everyone

I'm still feeling incredibly bad.. I just keep breaking down randomly and usually I dread therapy but today I really think I need it. So I'm off to therapy and I hope I feel even the slightest bit better tonight/tomorrow.. I dont think I can stand it much longer.

Hey Judo so sorry to hear about your friend
Your doing great with your WL WTG!! Cooking ahead of time sure does help, good for you !!

Spoz hope you have a good session sweetie.

Mom, get some rest

Off to get my DD to bring her to the doc....cold/allergies??? we'll see.

Mornin, chickies!

It was a real downer weekend, with a few bright spots, like going to see our friend Drew and visiting my aunt and uncle. Money is tight this month and we wouldn't have been able to make that trip if Drew hadn't offered to buy gas for us before we made the trip back home.

Anyway, the worry has been making me want food I shouldn't have. And I ran out of some of my supplements and have been forgetting to take others. I really feel the difference. All in all, it's been a struggle. Still, I'm fighting the good fight. I lost 0.5 pounds last week.

Time with Uncle G is getting increasingly stressful as his Alzheimer's progresses. Every conversation is the same. He talks about the techniques he used when he was working in the lab, how he held off retirement until he was 72, that people need to eat more slowly and they'll lose weight. He brings up those topics very single conversation. I can only imagine how my aunt must feel having the same conversations every day.

She seems especially sensitive to the weight loss tip. It doesn't matter that he won't remember, she keeps trying to tell him that eating more slowly is only one tool, for countering one type of eating problem and that not everybody with weight problems has the same issue.

Fortunately, the weekend ended on a real high note. Dinner at Sweet Tomatoes that I didn't over-indulge in and 40 minutes in the pool at Mom's house.

At the end of my workout I realized how much I really did enjoy the mental benefits of exercise. I didn't take any music with me that time, so for the first 20 minutes or so, my brain was centered on the money problems and my fears of the future... that's a-whole-nother story really... but then something clicked and I stopped thinking altogether... I mean, it was a bit like dreaming, where thoughts skimmed over the surface of my mind, snippets of songs, noticing the way the light in the pool looked or the way my body made the water in the whole pool swell and ebb... I came out of it feeling pretty content.

Thank all the powers that payday is not far off. At least rent and power will be covered.

Because you are such wonderful people, I want to share with you what I worry about. Maybe if I give the fears voice, they'll stop bothering me...

I'm afraid that I might not get my four-year degree. The best I could do with my degree at that point would be a job at a day-care or preschool which wouldn't pay enough, I'm afraid.

I'm afraid that if I do get my bachelors, I won't make a good teacher. Mostly, I worry about my temper, even though I rarely lose it, but if I do lose it, I could make some huge mistakes that would be difficult to recover from. (No, I don't think I'd hit a child - I'm more worried about saying something inappropriate.)

I'm afraid that it won't matter what job I have in the future, jobs and pay are both going to be so low and taxes so high that we'll be struggling just to survive. I'm worried about the direction our economy has been going the past 35 years and that the system will have to completely break down before it can be replaced with something more stable.

I'm worried that there are really fundamental needs, like vision correction, clothes, and nutrition that just wouldn't get met without the assistance of my extended family, and at 40, that's a very uncomfortable situation. I'm worried that I will always be needy, and ashamed that I am needy now.

Okay, I've worked myself up quite enough. I feel like crying, so I must have really touched on the issue with me. Thanks everyone for bearing with my while I treat a post on a message board like my blog.

spoz, i've had days like that. it feels awful. I hope your therapy session can help.

sassy, i hope you start to feel better as you get back into the normal routine! I think it's hard to go back even after a weekend, let alone a vacation!

Judo, props on getting so much accomplished this weekend! I tend to get pretty lazy when I know I have larger chunks of free time. Sorry to hear about your friend, but it's nice that you got to chat.

Tera, the economy stinks and it seems like no jobs pay enough. I'm very scared about the direction things are going. I'm sure you can finish your degree, and teachers are in high demand, so try not to worry too much - focus on the here and now.

I overslept this morning, kept hitting the snooze - and yes, I have to physically get out of bed to do that, but I did it anyway. I just couldn't deal with getting up today. Ugh, monday!

Thanks for the kind words ladies.

Terra, I have many of the same worries right now. I hate feeling needy and wonder if I'll ever feel anything but that. I have tax class tomorrow and I'm not prepared, nor do I have the energy to prepare for it. I want to quit b/c I just feel so ran down and lousy all the time, but I hate to give up the opportunity for a part time job during tax season with the economy the way it is.

I'm just tired and want to escape.

Hugs to all who are struggling right now, it seems to be several of us.

Terra I can so relate. I worry about my Degree, I mean right now I'm only doing a diploma and I'm really trying my best to get back into it and give it my whole and re introduce myself to being around people, but I really worry about what I'll do if I get onto my degree and what happens after. will I ever get a job? Will I cope?

Also my Grandma had very bad Alzheimer's too - it can be very frustrating to see your relations like that, but thankfully it doesn't hurt them

I'm doing okay today. New project so I've alot of work to do and just don't know where to begin... I'm feeling much much better about my weight loss, I don't care about the scale anymore I just feel so enthusiastic about the gym and getting my body into shape and challenging myself I've aso developed a really strange phobia that I'm getting a lazy eye. It's totally stupid and illogic but it's really scaring me.

Sassy here's hoping you have that nice quiet night and your day looks brighter!

Hope big hugs to you, I hope today has been a better one for you too

And Buddly - where are ya? Hope you're doing good so far this week and I hope you're doing ok.

And Leenie thanks for all of those hugs yesterday! You're a star

BIG to my 3FC crew!

Of course I'm not the only one who worries about finances or the future. Thank you, ladies for standing with me, for helping me recognize that these are legitimate fears I'm facing.

Yesterday as I was doing homework it occured to me that I was not making sense worrying about the kind of teacher I'll be. I'm sure to have better days and worse days, just like I do with getting healthier and working through classes. As long as I have many more better days than worse days, things will go fine - I just need to take the work as it comes and not stress about the big picture.

Sassy, sorry things suck at work. Call center employees are often treated like slaves. The corporation does whatever makes a profit and the people who are really in charge seem unknowledgeable and/or uncaring about what goes on in the lower ranks. (This is my experience at least.)

Aren't you glad you're not your manager/supervisor?

So... current events. Yesterday, I was on plan all the way. I miss my mom, though. She was supposed to have gotten back from Germany yesterday afternoon, but due to a series of flight connection mishaps, she hasn't returned yet.

Tomorrow's my birthday and I'm breaking with the recent tradition (4 years or so) of a family dinner "out" on the weekend. I'm going to ask for build-your-own-burrito night with strawberry shortcake for dessert!

Happy Tuesday, Chicks! It's a Brand New Day! (Uh oh, flashing back to Dr. Horrible again.)

Good morning everyone

I'm still around and actually yesterday and today haven't been to bad so far. I just have to get moving and get some housework done as its a bit of a disaster here. At least the sun is out and its beautiful outside, if I had any sense I'd go out for a walk. At least I have a healthy veggie full stir fry planned for dinner. Picked up all the veggies yesterday, looking forward to that.

Lauren I'm glad to see you are feeling a little better today

Tera I have major fears about the future and job security as well (not mine hubby's) I'm finding I can't watch the news anymore as it just upsets me with the what ifs. I do read our local paper and of course there are the headlines on the net so I'm not completely in the dark. But if I get overloaded with the bad outlooks I start to wonder what the point of everything is and I start looking down a very wrong path and I honestly don't want to go there. I'm finding that if I hang on things usually have a way of working themselves out and we weather through.
And Happy Birthday tomorrow in case I don't get back (I have a dentist appt tomorrow) and that build your own burrito and strawberry shortcake sounds wonderful!

Hope I hope you are feeling better Sounds like you need a good sleep and a day of nothing. How are your puppies? Bet they miss you being gone all day.

Sassy did you survive the night? I don't know how you can manage doing the graveyard thing long term. I did the 10-6 shift for a bit and found it really hard and that was for only three nights a week!

Judo doing better now that its Tuesday? I woke up thinking it was Thursday what a shock when the reality hit!! And good for you on your planning and pre-cooking. A lot of work but boy I'm sure its a huge help and makes everything easier later on.

Iris hows today going?

Leenie, Cathy, mom and everyone else

well have a great day everyone and I hope the rest of the week is good to you.
Take care,
K