I have been dieting for about 2 1/2 weeks now. I lost 9 pounds but gained 3 after a weekend break and lost another pound yesterday. I'm slacking big time. I know what I want but I just don't have the motivation like i did in the beginning. I tried doing my exercise video but could only do half of it. I'm tired and feeling lazy. I want to lose weight and look really good but it's so hard for me to get out of the "break" mode. I would love any suggestions/comments/"put downs". Any type of encouragement would help. Thanks.

I know exactly how you feel! I felt the same way last year about this time. You have to want it for yourself. No one can make you lose the weight. For me, it was the fact that I wanted to live a long healthy life and watch my children grow up and have kids. Maybe you can write down the reasons you want to lose weight. Hang it someplace that you can see it daily.

Remember, you didnt gain it all overnight, so its not going to come off easily.

You can do it! Whenever you feel discouraged, just come here to post. There's tons of support here!

Stop thinking of every day as a 'diet'. Seriously. Think of every single day as a way to reward your own body by getting healthier.

Don't keep crap in the house. NEVER reward yourself with 'food'. There are no 'break' days. Just every day - each day one step closer to the healthy you that you CAN be.

It's all up to you - and you CAN do this. There is no quick fix, no way to still eat what you want to and lose the weight you want to lose. You must eat less and move more - and THAT is what you will come to love. YOU can do this - YOU are in the driver's seat.

No excuses. It isn't 'easy', but it doesn't have to be a daily struggle. YOU can control what goes in your mouth - no one else. YOU can be your own reward - you really, really can.

Heather

hi tkglen

you doing great, you lost 7 lb in less than 3 weeks :c arrot:
keep up the good work.
i work 6 days a week, i also find it hard to go home and exercise instead of spending time with my daughter or my husband...it's much easier to be lazy but all i'm thinking about know is that one day i'm gonna be able to wear shorts, skirts..to go shopping for swiming suits...to wear a cute tank top without showing off my belly....and the list can go on....
i also like to read succes stories of people they have lost a lot of weight...and i try to think that i can do it...we all can...
so please...don't give up...WE CAN DO THIS
MICHELLE

OK... well, you were warned! You need to come to terms with this. You need to realize that you're not going to lose all the weight you have to lose in a couple of weeks or even a couple of months. You have to know that you can't go back to your old eating habits and expect not to gain.

As Meg said, "If you want it, you'll find a way. If you don't, you'll find an excuse."

What is it going to be?

Some things to think about:
- It does not get easier as you get older and/or heavier. Many 3FC members know this.
- Commitment can't come and go every weekend. That's not commitment, that's a hobby.
- Enthusiasm goes away, and motivation isn't always going to be there. That's when commitment comes through. And when commitment seems weak, discipline ("just do it") will sometimes save the day.

Good luck! Please don't quit!

Jay

Wow! I am totally impressed with the advice and suggestions from all of you! I clicked on this thread because I too am starting to feel less committed to myself. I blew it big time this weekend and unfortunately gained. But coming here and reading all these words of wisdom has really helped me to see a little more clearly! Thank you!

This happens to EVERYONE.

First, are you on a DIET, or did you make a lifestyle change? You can go on and off a diet, no problem...but once you've made a lifestyle change, you've got habits to go on.

You're at the hardest part. They say forming a new habit takes 21 days...including an exercise habit! So you've gotten past the part where momentum and excitement can take you, without quite reaching the part where it's a habit. Know that it is going to get easier to stick on plan the longer you do it, and the sooner you deviate from plan, the longer its going to take you to get into your groove.

Keep on trucking! Commit and decide to stick with it...you'll be so glad you did!

Jay, can I just say... you are so quotable! (It's wonderful!) Who needs Bartlett's when we have you?? Those two items right there really stuck out to me, those are very useful things to remember when struggling. Way to make a point in a concise, easy-to-understand statement (I just may have to start quoting you now. No more Confucius, just JayEll.)

Maybe I should change my user name to "Confuse-Us."

Jay

Judy, I thought the same thing! Thanks Jay. Well said.

tk, I noticed that you have "put downs" in your message. You won't get "put downs" here. Don't confuse the verbal spanking you've just gotten with a "put down".

It's hard! It's especially hard when you have one foot almost in the grave and the other on a banana peel like me. Also, post menopausal weight is harder to lose. Do it now.

It's hard to get back into the "habit" of exercising when you've had a couple of weeks off due to an injury. That's my challenge right now. Nobody put the food in my mouth to get me here but me. Nobody is stopping me from exercising. It is me!

You can do it. After all, isn't it all about you? It should be right now.

Great support coming in from everyone here, but reading JayEll's two bullets about commitment, and something struck a chord with me. When I hear the word commitment, it bring to mind marriage!

Now imagine a young couple, about to marry, and they vow to be committed to each other on the weekdays. Weekends are free times, when they aren't required to commit to one another. The idea is preposterous! (At least to most couples.)

Further, most people who are married (or who've been in long term relationships like I have) would probably agree that there are times when you just can't stand your SO. That's pretty normal, I've heard. But when you are in that moment when you just can't stand the other person, your commitment to them is why you stay in the relationship. It might not be as much fun, or as romantic, or as sexy as it once was... but it's real, and you've made a commitment to that person until the end.

I don't say these things to indicate that you're never supposed to splurge or indulge yourself with a piece of cake or whatever you wish... I think it's probably a good idea to do that from time to time. And I'm certainly not trying to call you out for having a difficult time hopping back on the wagon, tk, because it's very hard for me to do as well. I just found it helpful to think of my commitment to my new life in this new way. I'm as important as my SO, and therefore the promises and commitments that I make to myself should be as important as those I make to my SO.

I think you just have to accept that you're going to feel that way sometimes. If you know ahead of time that you will have days where you don't feel at all motivated or energetic, they're easier to deal with. But think positive: the next day will be better, and you'll be glad you didn't give up completely.

Well said Aero!!! I do believe that will help me out thinking about it like that!

thank you everyone for your support. i have been thinking about it all day. it is a commitment and do have to stick with it.

Not only does it not get easier, but the results you crave are not the same, the longer you put it off.

I think of every diet and attempt to lose weight I ever started - way back from the time I was in college and weighed what is now my goal weight (and i wanted to drop 10 lbs).

I'm now in my 40s. I was over 100 lbs overweight. I've lost a little over 60 lbs and I still have 35 or so to go before I hit my goal. I think back to when I weighed this much before at my mid 170s when I was 27. I didn't have the loose skin and the belly overlap that I have now. I could have dropped 30 lbs and my tummy would have tightend up and I would have looked a lot better. Or I could have kept at 135 from when I was in college, instead of leetting myself slide into .. this.

Now the weight I will have lost in my 40s, over 100 lbs, means that I'm going to have skin issues, stretch marks, and will probably wind up considering and spending money on plastic surgery (that will leave me with scars).

Had I stuck with it in my late 20's - before I developed the belly and the boobs - and had I remembered that this isn't just a diet, it's my life - I wouldn't be in this position now.

And while I think that after I reach my goal weight, surgery will be worth it for me (and I've done a lot of research and know what realistic results to expect are), I also am just a little pissed at myself that I'll wind up spending $5k or more on something that WASN'T NECESSARY if I'd just thought about what I was doing to my body.

I could do so much more with that $5k and with all the money I've wasted on food that I never really enjoyed anyway and that has put me into this position.

Is it worth it to have a momentary enjoyment of something .. before it becomes a huge burden later on? That's one of the things that clicked with me when I really decided to lose weight. I can eat 1/2 a can of Pringles now ... and enjoy it. But will that 15 minutes of enjoyment added to other 15 minute bursts of enjoyment be worth the realization that I weigh more than my husband and that I can't fit into any of my clothes and I feel awful and look worse?

For me ... no.

So it's something to think about every time you're tempted to give up, to say "to **** with it", to think "it's not working anyway".