Hello, everyone! I'm a new de-lurker who is just a posting machine now that I know how supportive this site is! One of my biggest surprises after the long haul of losing about 65 pounds, was that underneath, I still looked like me! I know, this sounds pretty silly, but it's true. Somewhere in my head, I guess I thought that the Magic Bluebirds from Disney would fly down after I lost weight, and I would be "Beautiful". Like, my shoulders would no longer be a bit broad for my frame, my lower belly would not have a "blip" in it, the cellulte around my knees would spontaneoulsy diasppear, because I had become A Thin Person. Now, I'm working really hard to love the uniqueness of my body, and to rejoice in the health benefits and new mobility that I have achieved for myself. But, I am still caught by suprise sometimes that being thin has nothing to do with obtaining unrealistic perfection! I am healthy, loved, and emotionally much more comfortable with myself. But, sometimes, I still wish for those Bluebirds...... -anyone else fighting the Myth?

Circebee! We love delurkers and especially love the ones who post a lot (because then they get us thinking!) Great post! I think we all have fantasies of what life after goal will be like and most of them turn out to be ... fantasies. Trust me, that Magic Bluebirds figured into a lot of my dreams too. (the ones about effortless maintenance and no more eating issues, among others)

We're still the same people, with the same issues, likes, dislikes, and problems etc -- just in a different, smaller containers.

Congratulations on your weight loss and more importantly, your outlook on how it's changed (and not changed) your life. C'mon and post with us in the Living Maintenance forum so we can get to know you.

Thanks, Meg!
Oh, yes, the "How easy it will be once I am thin" fantasy. Well, let me tell you, I'm still waiting for THOSE Magic Bluebirds to show up. If you see them, send them on over! I promise to pass them on when I'm done with them-ha!

This reminded me of a blog post that I read a bit ago...check out this post over at Shapely Prose.

Haha! I felt the same way the first time I lost weight. I was convinced my hip bones were really fat deposits. I wondered why I didn't have a perfectly flat stomach, or a thinner waist.

We can only lose weight, we can't change our body build, that's what I learned. This time I'm appreciating my body's natural shape...

circebee - Love the avatar by the way. It reminds me of a series of books I read as a kid, called Catwings.

Thanks, Cats tongue! My Avitar is a painting by Stephanie Pui-Min Law, a fabulous artist who specializes in fairies, beasties, and mythical themes. I actually have a tattoo of one of her fox spirit paintings. And also, thanks Sidhe, for that link- what a rockin' post of personal power! Whoo hoo!

Oh, I wish I could have some magical bluebirds...

Circebee, Congratulations on your weightloss!

My experience was a little different. During the loss I was just so amazed at how different I looked. Mine was more of the OMG that's me in a mirror or storefront window moments. Then year two hit. I was in even better shape, much less bodyfat but for some reason skepticism set in. I became much more critical of my body. That fat deposit above the knee you referred to in the message, check. I got that too. One of the things I noticed is that I look a little more (ahem) mature in the face now. There isn't as much fat to fill in the wrinkles.

But oh, it is so worth it. I think I have my bluebird moments when I hit the dressing rooms and find that I can actually wear attractive clothes again. once the rose colored glasses came off, I do see that I still look like "me" but it is much healthier and overall happier version of me.

I thought those "magic bluebirds" would also make me instantly happier and more confident, more likable and probably more intelligent as well.

It didn't happen. Well, not overnight, but bit by bit I am working on those issues individually.

Like Meg said, we are wholly the same people, just smaller.

No magic *poof* you're perfect. Just like there was no magice pill to *poof* make you thinner.

But it is so great that you recognize what you DO have; like health and love (and thinness). Instead of holding out for unattainable perfection.

And a big WELCOME as well!!

Ha, it's kind of a combination for me. I am very surprised by some of the changes in my body - my slender upper arms, my cheekbones, my small upper torso. I am also very familiar with MY shape - my big left saddlebag (bigger on the left leg than the right - STILL), my curving belly, my short waist (which makes me look dumpy in some clothes - STILL). I'm just a smaller verison of how I have always looked. But still, a SMALLER version! I rue the things that will never change, but overall I am tremendously happy with my body post weight loss!

Yup! I completely understand!

I did get my thin face back, but the double tummy roll thing stayed (got smaller thankfully.) I've always known that I would never have a bikini body (we're built for child birth in my family), but still you secretly wish that things might be different.

Then again, my whole goal was to lose weight for health, so I can't complain too much. I do feel like my lifestyle changes have made me a healthier person. I no longer have HBP and I have a world more of energy. This is what I try to focus on when I'm not feeling too great about how my body looks.

I am a little different. I think i finally look like me. When i looked in the mirror at my fat face, i saw me. But when i looked at a picture of my fat face and body....who was that person??? I didn't recognize her. I don't think i ever really reconciled with myself that i was fat. Probably since i refused to get in front of the camera anymore. There aren't that many pictures of me fat. Now, i love getting my picture taken. I love the "old" me. She's still a work in progress....but she's the girl i remember from before. I still have my trouble areas...my flabby belly, my jiggly thighs, my fat rolls over my jeans if they're too snug...but it all looks much better than it used to.

I've had a sort of different experience. Having been fat since childhood, I was honestly convinced that I had a 'round face' and 'round shoulders' and that kind of things. I don't know if it's the consequence of losing weight or, all that simply, of going deeper into adult age, but for some time, I've felt like I was 'not me'. Mirror, mirror, who is that woman with square jaws and cheeks that are not round at all, on the contrary? Did I always have nice square shoulders all ready to welcome and display some more muscle? And wait, I do have high cheekbones? Wow!

On the other hand, some things haven't changed and probably won't. I guess my lower body will always be that of a woman ready to carry 20 children into this world thanks to her solid, large hips.

Kery, I had a similar experience to you. When I look at old childhood pictures, I look like a normal child but not stick skinny like a lot of the girls. I was convinced I was chubby (and my thin mother helped me believe that) and dieted from the age of 11 on. Until my first child, I was normal/thin through extreme dieting and exercising, but always thought I was fat. So when I really did become fat, It just re-enforced my own self-image of a short, but big boned woman, naturally heavy. I just got fatter for nearly 20 years.

Sometime in the last six and a half years of maintenance, I realized I really am small. Yes, I still have broad shoulders and a big rib cage and no waist, but I am a small person. Not birdlike like my mother, but under neath the fat and the misconceptions I found a strong, petite woman. Although I still turn around to see who is standing behind me when someone else calls me petite!

Mel

I'm going to de-lurk on a de-lurker's thread!

I wish my attitude about the lack of "Magic Bluebirds" were as healthy as the rest of yours. I've been 210 at my heaviest and 108 at my thinnest, and at every point, I've realized I still look the same. Parts of me look horrific after losing weight. The only real aesthetic benefit is that I look better with clothes, but without, it's a trainwreck. My chest looks worse than ever.

On the bright side, I guess it's a lot easier to run a marathon without packing an extra 80 lbs.