Where's your motivation?

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  • I think I left mine in a field somewhere last May

    I just want to ask...

    If you've been really really heavy in the past, but now you're a featherweight - and at the weight you are now, you're acceptable. You feel good about yourself because you can be perceived as "normal". You can shop in most shops, you look good in most clothes, you can run, hike, kickbox, lift, trampoline, swim etc etc for hours on end and love life. You wake up every morning thinking, "Bring on the day".

    So what makes you step out of your current comfort zone and push to take that last little bit off?

    Do you need to step out of your comfort zone? Is it worth it? Isn't it pretty good here already? Can you fit in the extra hour of cardio a day it would take to drop another 10, 14, 20lbs? Do you think you'd look better 20lbs lighter, or would you be all ribs and cheekbones?

    Ok, see from my tone I don't feel that need or that drive to be any thinner, even though I've put on about 7lbs since we got married. I still look good, my clothes still fit etc etc.

    But what is YOUR drive? What makes you refuse that dessert when you eat out? What makes you ask for the dressing on the side and refuse the bread? What makes you get your butt out of the door when it's SNOWING for a run?

    I want to understand what makes other people tick to lose that last little bit, because I don't know if I have it....

    Is the number on the scale really THAT important? If I was the size I am now and the scales said 154, then I'd probably be pretty happy, or maybe would try and get another 7lbs off perhaps. Some days I do feel a little puffy.

    So what's your motivation?
  • For me, part of it is my current age and the very likely fact that I will gain weight as I age further. I'm only 24 and I'd like to be at a weight where if I gain into my 30's and 40's I'll still feel happy with my figure. Losing weight is only going to get harder as time goes on, which is why I need to get as fit as I can now.

    Also, I'm finding the support of other people to be even more important than before. It is so easy to feel content with looking "good enough." I did gain back a significant amount of weight, but I joined up with some of the "Chicks up for a challenge" and that has kept me so motivated. Before, if I was tempted with dessert, I would feel I'm only disappointing myself. Now, I feel like I would be letting other people down as well.

    Maybe try varying your goals more? Before, my one goal was just "lose weight." Now, I'm focusing on a more specific diet as my goal. Succeeding with that motivates me to workout and as a result, I've seen 10 of the 15 pounds I gained go away (I haven't moved my ticker, but I'm 4.5 lbs. away).

    You've done well, and the fact that you DO feel happy is important. Just assess your priorities and I'm sure you'll find what will make you happiest. Motivation is important but some people do change their original goals and that can be ok too if you're happy and healthy.
  • 2frustrated: I often have the exact same thoughts. I recently admitted to my husband and my father-in-law that I think the reason I keep eating whatever I want is because I just don't feel bad about my body. I'm a 4/6, and while I could stand to lose 10-20 lbs and gain much more muscle tone -- I look halfway decent the way I am.

    I've gained about 5-7 lbs after my August wedding, and I want that gone and more! I looked great in my wedding dress, but a giant skirt hides a multitude of sins and -- to be honest -- my arms could have been a bit more sculpted!

    So, now I'm trying to figure out what will motivate me. I love the way I feel when I exercise and have recently re-committed myself to working out on a very consistent basis. This helps with the food choices because I don't want to negate all of my hard work by eating junk.

    I'm also trying to eat badly only when I really *want* bad foods and know I will enjoy them. For instance, yesterday, my husband wanted a cheeseburger for lunch -- I had turkey on a whole wheat tortilla instead, because I just didn't *want* the cheeseburger that badly. Sure, it would have been great, but it wasn't something that I was really craving.

    On the other hand, this weekend, I had Coldstone because I really wanted it, and I savored every bite. Now, I got a bigger size than I should have -- and this is something else to work on: how to limit my portions and make good choices about how MUCH I eat as well as what I eat.

    As for just plain ol' motivation: I am trying to focus on how good it will feel to succeed and actually lose weight, which is something that has never purposefully happened for me. My weight has always fluctuated within about 5-10 lbs., and I've never experienced the joy of seeing steady weight loss on the scale.

    I am so proud of myself for getting this far with my exercise and actually running 2 miles yesterday as part of C25K. I also want to be proud of myself for losing weight.

    In addition, I think it would be great to not worry so much about whether an outfit made me look chubby.
  • My motivation is my butt and legs. Okay, so it's quite superficial, but let me explain.

    All my adult life (from college on--and perhaps even in high school) I weighed around 160-165. I wore a size 12. I was more or less normal but wished I was more like my skinny friends.

    When I got married, I managed to get down to 155 but promptly put it back on and a few extra to go with it. There I stayed for several years. At one point, I must have been unhappy because I wrote down all my measurements and decided to go on a diet.

    And then I found out I was pregnant.

    I folded the measurement paper in my "what to expect when you're expecting" pregnancy book and proceeded to have baby #1. I know for a fact that I got up to 199 during that pregnancy. I do not know if I went higher--I may have blocked it out!!!

    Fast forward 4 years. I'm pregnant again. I pull out my "what to expect" book and voila! my measurement paper. I looked it over and said to myself, wow, I was unhappy THEN and I weigh the exact same NOW! Not good.

    At that point I made a decision. When I was done with this second (and last) pregnancy, I was going to go on a diet and lose weight and make all the goals I had written down on that measurement paper.

    Fast forward again. DS is born and weaned. I'm sick of looking at myself in the mirror. It is time to get on that diet. I do. I lose 40 post pregnancy pounds in about 6 months or less. I feel great. I exercise 3 times a week. I'm a bit skinny at 128, but I'm happy.

    Then life happened. Work got stressful. I had less time to exercise. I got lazy and complacent. I gained 10 or so pounds. I rationalized by thinking I had been too skinny so this is better. Life continued and the weight stayed more or less the same for about 4 years. Then work got even more stressful and I gained back all the rest.

    Finally it is August 2005. I quit my stressful job and decide I am going to lose weight again, but I have no real plan. I walk the dogs, but I'm enjoying myself. 4 months pass and I've actually gained weight rather than lose it! I devote myself to losing weight. I find 3FC. I walk many miles almost daily. I watch my fat and calories. I drop 15 pounds or so. I'm on my way!

    As I progress, I learn that I'm no longer dieting--I've changed my lifestyle for the better. I have good weeks and not so good weeks but I manage to drop over 30 pounds (until now). I am a size 6--nothing I EVER wore in high school or college.

    So there is where my motivation comes in. DH, DS, DD and I did a 5k walk/run a few weeks ago. Our photos were taken at the finish line. I was wearing shorts. I can tell that although I look good in clothes, I don't look so good in shorts and I can just imagine what a bathing suit would do!!! So, my motivation to continue losing is right there--lose a few pounds and HOPE they come from the derrier! If not, then the gym will have to be enlisted to at least try and shape these areas so they aren't so jiggly!

    But I do have to say that my motivation is not 100% perfect. I have weaknesses. I give in from time to time to my temptations. But as I look at it, as long as I don't GAIN weight, I can afford to have the chips and salsa at the Mexican restaurant, I can have a piece of bread and the steakhouse, I can order a dessert if I want it. BUT I cannot do it EVERY time. I believe in moderation. I do not overdo anything (including healthy food). I don't stuff myself and make myself feel miserable. I eat only foods that I like--I refuse to eat diet food that is yucky. What's the point in that? I believe that as I slowly progress toward my goal that I am putting in steps that will allow me to maintain my loss this time--strategies that will allow me my temptations without sabotaging all of my hard work.
  • Quote: What makes you get your butt out of the door when it's SNOWING for a run?
    Nothing, absolutely nothing

    Motivation generally? Well you say you don't think you have it but on re-reading your post I think you've answered your own question. You're happy with where you are, you like yourself, you feel good and you think you look good - I've seen some of your photos and I agree. Given how you feel then why on earth would you half kill yourself to get to some randomly plucked number on a ticker?

    My motivation? To feel like you do. To feel happy and healthy and to think I look good. I don't feel any of those things, I didn't at 135 and I sure as **** don't at 148. When I feel as good as you do I'll stop. No matter what it says on my ticker.
  • I think motivation is a bit overrated. But this is my take on things.

    When I was a dumb kid I worried about numbers on a scale.

    Gasp the horror of being 135 that kind of nonsense. And I had no clue about muscle development or fitness or whatever. But the whole try to be thin game got old and I decided I would just not worry about it.

    Fast forward to my 20s I settled in at about 155 got more active but not necessarily fit. Basically took a laize faire attitude.

    Fast forward to 30s kids like allison that 199 on the scale maybe worse I don't want to think about it and voila here I am now.

    For awhile I was just too darned busy with kids to worry. At 185 about 6 months after dd was born I though I can't stay like this. So I lost 10 and then I was happy. Now I have caught the fitness bug. I am down another 10 but I want to get all buffed out and superwomanish.

    Numbers on a scale are just numbers on a scale. I think they are a good reality check to make sure we are not super way off but I don't think they are the best way to measure progress.

    In your post you said if you were your same size at 154 you might try to get 7 lbs off.

    Why not make that 7lbs your next goal? Sounds like you are really close to being where you want to be. Its your body and it sounds like you are doing an awesome job with it. When you get there ask yourself if the numbers were different would you be satisfied. It is a good question I think

    Anyhow I know I am more than 7 away form my goal. I look down and my belly is smiling me there in the face so to speak. Butt and legs are fine but I am built like santa clause. I think when my belly shrinks I will relax a bit. But of course I had a belly at 135 (an itty bitty one of course but it was still there). But superwoman will have at least another 10lbs of muscle.
  • Since this past summer when I really realized that the change in my eating habits was causing me to lose weight, I became very motivated to improve it further with a healthy eating plan. I started watching a whole foods cooking show, went to the bookstore an bought a cookbook, and when I can, I now buy organic foods. The weight has continued to come off and I started to feel really healthy.

    At the end of February, I learned of 3FC and found the Featherweights forum and realized I could use it to become accountable for adding daily exercises to my weight loss plan. Now, I'm into my fourth week and I've become stronger by doing my floor exercises and I feel healthier when I breathe in and out from doing the minimally aerobic exercises. In the future, I hope to be able to increase to a cardio level of exercise.

    So the desire to eat healthy and exercise is what motivated me to lose the last 5 pounds of a 50 pound weight loss.

    Today, I learned by visiting these three sites that Blue to Blue recommended:

    - http://nutrition.about.com/library/b...tion_guide.htm
    - http://www.calorieking.com/tools/weight_maintenance.php
    - http://www.calorie-count.com/calories/calories-goal.php

    that at my current calorie intake level of a weekly average of 1,300, I will lose another 5 pounds in two months. Like Alison, I hope it's a lot in my thighs, a little bit in my butt, and like Hikerchick a little in my tummy.

    So, moving forward, I believe that the desire to have a better shape will be my main motivator.
  • Quote: But I do have to say that my motivation is not 100% perfect. I have weaknesses. I give in from time to time to my temptations. But as I look at it, as long as I don't GAIN weight, I can afford to have the chips and salsa at the Mexican restaurant, I can have a piece of bread and the steakhouse, I can order a dessert if I want it. BUT I cannot do it EVERY time. I believe in moderation. I do not overdo anything (including healthy food). I don't stuff myself and make myself feel miserable. I eat only foods that I like--I refuse to eat diet food that is yucky. What's the point in that? I believe that as I slowly progress toward my goal that I am putting in steps that will allow me to maintain my loss this time--strategies that will allow me my temptations without sabotaging all of my hard work.
    alinnell: I believe this will be my motivation! I agree completely with everything you have said -- I could not do it any better. YOU are my motivation!!
  • Quote: alinnell: I believe this will be my motivation! I agree completely with everything you have said -- I could not do it any better. YOU are my motivation!!
    Awwwww, thanks!
  • Thanks for all your replies chickies

    The jury's still out on whether I'm going to try extra hard or just go with the flow, although I think I'd like a few more pounds off, perhaps even those 7lbs that hikerchick suggested... Then I'd be back down to my "comfortable" weight of last year. Sounds like a better plan....
  • Hmmm ... such a thought provoking question. I've thought about this thread for quite a while now. I actually had a note written in notepad and erased it.

    I keep having these nebulous notions about ...
    the many facets of the term 'goal'
    weight? inches? percentages? size?
    the end is near
    what the heck is the end
    drat there will be no end
    I have proved that I'm a lousy maintainer
    actually it's much easier to gain and lose, gain and lose than to maintain
    I can't even decide if I have a last little bit
    I don't care if I get faster
    I would like to be more toned

    All in all, the best answer I could come up with is that we know we don't want to quit. We've learned alot. Maybe soon we'll learn something that gives us a new goal ???
  • Quote: the end is near
    what the heck is the end
    drat there will be no end
    I can't even decide if I have a last little bit
    I don't care if I get faster
    I would like to be more toned

    All in all, the best answer I could come up with is that we know we don't want to quit. We've learned alot. Maybe soon we'll learn something that gives us a new goal ???
    Yes
    Yes
    Yes
    Yes
    Yes
    and Yes

    Not quitting - maybe that is the best goal?
  • My motivation - I'm goal orientated so when I say that I will do something I will do it. I commited to myself to lose 6 stone/84lbs and I will do that. I do find that I am becoming more complacent with my exercise/eating these days though...
  • For me it's all about mood if am not in the right mood I just can't get started, then it's seeing the weight come down that keeps me going. If I get a week where nothing has come of I loose my motivation and reach for the chocolate. I hope that by joining here I will have another outlet for the frustration of seeing no results other than a chocolate bar.
  • My motivation is the fact that I threw away all of my fat clothes when I lost 50 pounds and I can't afford to buy all new clothes again also I want more than anything to stay in my size 8s! So I keep plugging along