Hi Stephy and WELCOME!!
You had that wake up call, huh? It sounds like you've had a bunch of changes lately and they can really wreak havoc on any kind of good eating regimen we're on. Add lactose intolerance and gluten allergy (is that what it is), and things DO get more difficult.
My advice is to first, take a deep breath. You can do this. Okay, you can let the breath out now.
Second, if you are like many of us, you are overwhelmed by all the things you think you should be doing and can't possibly see how to fit them all in. If that's the case, my advice is twofold: commit to doing something about your weight AND take baby-steps to get there.
I didn't get my wake up call until much after you did. I knew what I was supposed to do, but didn't see how *I* could do it. I started by bringing my lunch and snacks to work and watching portions. For a month, that was it. That was enough!
I started also trying to "move more," but that meant that if I had a question for hubby I would walk upstairs and ask him, rather than yelling up.
Later I was able to add more to the plan, but that was enough to start.
I also mentioned commitment. A lot of people talk about motivation -- and that's great to get you going, but, let's face it, sometimes we really lack in motivation. So, make the commitment that YOU are worth this change. Commit to finding a plan that works for you and your life. Be flexible if the plan stops working as well as you like.
Above all, commitment means that when you screw up and eat what you don't want to or eat too much (and it will happen) that you forgive yourself, figure out WHY you did it, and get back on the wagon!
So, what sounds like good baby steps to you??