My boss and I are fairly good friends, so I didn't think much when he said he wanted to tell me something that he considered a compliment, but to "please excuse me if it's not, but you know I'm still a boy." "I think X is jealous of you and your weight loss."
Apparently one of the other women that we work with has been noticing my weight and made some comments to him about it. Now, she's a bit over weight but far from being obese or anything, as far as I was concerned. She looks nice. Any whoo, she's been comparing herself to me and told my boss "Karen's lost a lot of weight! She looks better than me now!" My boss said her attitude was one of concern, like I had out done her at some important competition that I never knew existed.
Hmm, kind of sad for her to feel that way, but made me feel good none the less.
Isn't it amazing to discover how people react to the success of others?
"Concerned". Gotta love it. My best friend lost about 15 pounds. She was not overweight really, but was at the top of the range for her height. She stopped eating junk. Anyway, her BIL asked her husband if she "was well". GOD, they snipe when we're overweight and snipe when we lose weight.
Some people, like your co-worker, will just snipe at anything.
Too funny. Its kind of comforting to me, in a sick sort of way,ha ha to see other's insecurities come out as we lose weight. Seems like insecurities you never knew just come out of the wood work once you lose weight and they see you more confident.
Wow - it is so sad that so many women feel they need to compare themselves with one another - that their value or standing (or something else, not sure exactly what) might be diminished by someone else doing something great for themselves. It sounds like you have a great boss though. Congratulations that people are noticing!
Hi Christine, I remember you, saw your earlier post, glad you're still around!
I kind of knew that these things would happen, but I've also seen it doesn't have to do with weight. People will find something to talk about no matter what, but Nancy, you brought up something I hadn't thought of. This woman does work with a lot of men and I think she does have a hard time fitting with them at times. They may be giving her a hard time about it. You know...nudge, nudge, Karen can, why not you?
I wish we were close enough that I could say something to her, but considering she told a third person, I don't think it would be appropriate to bring it up. *sigh*
Last edited by cantforgetthis; 10-23-2006 at 12:42 AM.
I had a similar thing happen YEARS ago .. well ... more like the one that Christine mentioned ...
It was before I put on my biggest weight gain (lost that then have put it back on ... almost) but after I had my daughter and put on a few dozen pounds ... I used to walk into town every week to do the shopping etc and my friend had come around for a visit and said she had been asked by the lady on the corner (who I knew by sight .. you know the wave hello and how are you sort of thing) if I was ok ... my friend said why? Well .. said the woman .. I have heard she may have AIDS ... after all she is losing weight so quickly and is so pale.
OMG .. when I heard that I almost fell over the floor laughing!! I actually went down to the lady to tell her directly that Im as healthy as a horse .. in fact more so since I lost weight .... "its called exercise and good eating" I told her .. she was rather embarrassed ... just said she was concerned etc .. and after all I was so pale .... THATS BECAUSE I CANT SPEND A LOT OF TIME IN THE SUN you silly woman! My eyes are light sensitive and I cant be in the bright light for long so Im not in the sun long enough to get a good tan ... not to mention its bad for your skin anyway!
Its definitely rediculous to hear some people ... its like you cant win no matter what you do .. I think some people just like to bring others down to make themselves feel better about their own faults. Life is definitely too short to spend time worrying about those sorts of people ....
Great compliment tho Karen ... forget the negative aspect of it and wallow in the good part ... you sure do deserve it! Huggies
Karen, congrats on your nsv. Don't let what this woman said undermine your own self confidence. I'm glad you shared this. We all need to prepare ourselves for this kind of response. It is odd how people are competative in ways they keep to themselves. I'm certain it's just brought out her own insecurities. Poor thing. It's sad for her, but a great success for you. I understand your boss saying it's a "concern." It really wasn't an appropriate comment for her to make to a supervisor. (I work in an office of about 75 women and only 2 men) Just be sure to always cover you butt. It's silly to have to do that as you succeed, but we all need a work envirorment that's productive. on ALL kinds of people noticing. That in itself is way cool!
A few years ago, when I was 250, I got down to 199 and I can remember some people at work acting like that.
Also, I remembered this other unpleasant "side effect" from the weight loss...people treated me differently.
Now, I say it was unpleasant because I was the very same person at 250 that I was at 199.
I always dressed well, had my hair styled, wore make-up, etc. But, when I lost weight, suddenly people that never bothered with me before started talking to me. People that already talked to me were nicer. It was really obvious that people that knew me for years "liked me more".
I hate that. Thinking back on that, I get really angry. I did not feel better because I was more popular. It was more like I really saw what those people were.
The prejudice we experience is so hideously unfair.
Non Scale Victory .. for those things that let you know you are losing weight and getting healthier without the scale telling you so ... tying your shoes and being able to breathe through it ... getting a compliment on your loss ... fitting clothes that you grew out of ... just getting a workout completed .. or some exercise in your day no matter how much or little ..
Kind of cool but sad NSV
"I think X is jealous of you and your weight loss." 
on ALL kinds of people noticing. That in itself is way cool!
