Our actions are what help us lose weight and keep it off, but it is our state of mind that gives us the energy to act. What do you do for yourself to cultivate inner peace?
I practice chi gong - this has been life saving for me. I generally do not enjoy exercise that I have to lie down to do like yoga and never stick with it. Chi gong is done standing up and I can wear anything and I don't need any mats or equipment to do it, therefore it gets done.
I practice mindful eating - even a little bit of food can be a very satisfying experience if I sit down and eat it slowly. I avoid sitting on the couch to eat, which used to be the site of much of my binge eating. Instead I sit at the table, I take extra care to use a pretty plate and arrange my food on the plate the way they would at a restaurant and use a pretty glass for my water. I put my fork down between each bite and avoid distractions like tv, computers, phones etc. Even if I'm conversing with someone I try to check in to the food between each bite.
I exercise every day - even if all I have time for is a walk to the grocery store I make the most of it. I put on my sneakers and take the long way to get there. I do enjoy going to the park for a more pleasant walk.
I stretch every day - twice a day preferably but definitely before I go to bed. It helps to calm my nerves.
I try to unplug for long stretches of time. This means setting my phone so that it doesn't beep every time I get emails, leaving my phone in my purse while I'm at home doing chores, and staying away from the computer. It's a struggle!
I would like to meditate but I'm no good at it. I get distracted. I was reading about transcedental meditation which sounds kind of awesome but is too expensive to go and get trained properly. Bummer.
Dogs. I think having dogs does more good for my state of mind than any other single thing.
On top of their furry, barky awesomeness, exercise helps. Even a simple walk can quiet my nerves. Kayaking is soothing and distracting. Running is zen.
I eat well, brush my teeth, pay attention to my general health, try to be nicer to myself in my head, wear chapstick, and clean my contacts regularly.
But mostly I have dogs and they get me closer to inner peace.
Music usually does it for me, i have bipolar depression and sometimes this can make me feel truly alive.
Thankfulness goes a long way, i need to practice it much, much more.
The success for my 100 lb loss was also due in part to mindful eating. i do not put anything in my mouth anymore w/o thinking about it (except for Fridays which is a free day for me) and i try to eat as slow as possible.
I exercise almost daily and wish it did more for me (it probably does more than i know..) but i have CFS/Fibro and it keeps my viral flares going but, i still do it
So interesting. I was thinking about this last night before bed. I my experience, the things/methods that work to give me inner peace sometimes fail when new stressors arise. I have found that to be a recent problem.
But previously, running for me really helped give me inner peace. Nothing clears my mind like a run. My favorite which I haven't done since pregnancy, there is a 5 mile trail near me and I would go early in the morning, so beautiful. Sometimes I have run by deer there, and the trail itself encircles a lake, sometimes I can see it from the trail sometimes I can't depending on where on the trail I am.
I also find music really helps when I cannot run at any given moment.
Lately I have been thinking a lot about inner peace and people that disrupt it. Even though I am a pretty assertive person, I find I still tend to feel obligated to communicate and keep in my life people that cause me stress.
I have been trying to practice walking away from situations/people etc which serve me no good. If I feel anxiety, frustration and negativity related to something, I am learning how to simply disengage and be done with it.
I wish I could run but my I have finicky injury that arises every time I strain myself too much. It's in my future though, maybe if I lose more weight it will become easier.
The disruption to inner peace are innevitable. Some people handle stress so well and I admire them so much. Some people are impenetrable when it comes to outside influences and I want to be more like that, I'm working on it. Fortunately in a way I have inlaws who stress me out a lot so I get lots of practice lol.
I know it sounds dumb to quote a movie that is a comedy but there was one scene in which Morgan Freeman's character was speaking to Lauren Graham's character and it has stuck with me long term. I'm not religious much but this totally makes sense to me. Here's the scene, it's very short. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ikes4yPulmI
Music, my pets, trying to remember and focus on good times/moments/experiences in my life.
Thank you so much for all the wonderful ideas. Lots to consider and try!
For inner peace I have period of time where I'll keep off the computer, and put my phone away. I also relax a lot to music. Sometimes I have to just sit quietly with my thoughts and really focus on good things in life. This is particular true when I'm having a bad day with depression. I'm not sure that counts as inner peace so much as fighting my inner self so I don't fall into a place where I think I'm worthless.
For inner peace I have period of time where I'll keep off the computer, and put my phone away. I also relax a lot to music. Sometimes I have to just sit quietly with my thoughts and really focus on good things in life. This is particular true when I'm having a bad day with depression. I'm not sure that counts as inner peace so much as fighting my inner self so I don't fall into a place where I think I'm worthless.
I think we all fight our inner selves a lot. Sometimes that's a good thing and sometimes it's a bad thing. But we all have to force ourselves to be still from time to time.
I've been hearing a lot about transcedental meditation, but it's too expensive for me to try it.
Wannabeskinny, you said you're bad at mediation, but that's not true! I work at a group home for teen girls with behavioral issues, and we practice and teach something called Dialectic Behavioral Therapy. At one of my trainings, our DBT instructor told us this story:
Two men enter a Buddhist temple and see 2 Buddhist monks there meditating. The two men join them in mediation and after an hour, one man turns to the other and says "I'm no good at this, of the whole hour we were in there, I was maybe able to focus for 2 minutes." One of the monks turns to the other and says "This is wonderful. In that hour, I was able to find 2 whole minutes of complete concentration and peace."
Meditation (or mindfulness, as we call it) is not about being able to perfectly focus on something for an hour. It's about living completely in the present, and doing your best not to let your thoughts stray. You're going to get distracted a hundred times over, but each time you have an errant thought, just notice it, acknowledge it, and return to what you were focusing on.
Mindfulness doesn't have to just be sitting and focusing on your breathing either. It can be listening to music, eating, taking a walk, etc. Just do your best to focus on one thing, and when other things come up in your mind, just let them go. It's seriously been so helpful for me to be able to slow my brain down
I would recommend looking into Mindfulness and DBT as a whole. They were created to help people with Borderline Personality Disorder, but there is not a single thing that DBT cannot improve, mental health wise.
Thanks Chelainabear, I'm definitely interested and I do practice mindfulness while I eat. It has been tremendously helpful to me, life changing in fact. But mindful meditation is very difficult, it feels like I'm wrestling with my mind the whole time. I end up feeling more frustrated than anything. I don't want to spend an hour just to get 2 minutes of complete concentration. That's why I'm attracted to transcendental meditation, but the price keeps it out of my reach.
Last edited by Palestrina; 01-05-2015 at 07:45 AM.
Thanks Chelainabear, I'm definitely interested and I do practice mindfulness while I eat. It has been tremendously helpful to me, life changing in fact. But mindful meditation is very difficult, it feels like I'm wrestling with my mind the whole time. I end up feeling more frustrated than anything. I don't want to spend an hour just to get 2 minutes of complete concentration. That's why I'm attracted to transcendental meditation, but the price keeps it out of my reach.
There are many, many ways to meditate.
People think you have to either sitting quietly in the lotus or chant for half an hour, that's NOT the only way to meditate. Walking meditation is perfectly possible, it's considered active meditation. Chi gong is active meditation as is tai chi. Anything that calms the mind and shuts the chatter down, without requiring intense concentration, can become meditation.
And honestly, I think being charged outrageous amounts to be taught to meditate, any method, is BS. Get a book from the library or Google it. There's tons of valid information out there. Also there's a lot of free downloadable guided meditations, which is probably one of the better ways for most people (Westerners, in particular) to start. One of my favorite sites to send beginners to is Quiet Mind Cafe: http://quietmindcafe.com/
Another place I like is Osho's website. Lots of free information and meditations, particularly touching on active/dynamic meditations that appeal more to Westerners. http://www.osho.com/ I loved his book "Meditation, the First and Last Freedom". I think it's one of the most approachable manuals for various meditation methods (as well as the whole philosophy behind meditation).
Here's a short extract on how to meditate (not sure this would qualify as TM):
"The instructions were reassuringly simple:
1. Sit comfortably. You don’t have to be cross-legged. Plop yourself in a chair, on a cushion, on the floor—wherever. Just make sure your spine is reasonably straight.
2. Feel the sensations of your breath as it goes in and out. Pick a spot: nostrils, chest, or gut. Focus your attention there and really try to feel the breath. If it helps to direct your attention, you can use a soft mental note, like “in” and “out.”
3. This one, according to all of the books I’d read, was the biggie. Whenever your attention wanders, just forgive yourself and gently come back to the breath."
I'm still trying to wrap my mind around how meditation, whose goal seems to be a state of mindlessness, can lead to improved mindfulness, which is really what I'm after. There's the concept of "mindfulness meditation," which seems to be about being starting with being mindful of breath and extending it to emotions, actions, etc.
People think you have to either sitting quietly in the lotus or chant for half an hour, that's NOT the only way to meditate. Walking meditation is perfectly possible, it's considered active meditation. Chi gong is active meditation as is tai chi. Anything that calms the mind and shuts the chatter down, without requiring intense concentration, can become meditation.
And honestly, I think being charged outrageous amounts to be taught to meditate, any method, is BS. Get a book from the library or Google it. There's tons of valid information out there. Also there's a lot of free downloadable guided meditations, which is probably one of the better ways for most people (Westerners, in particular) to start. One of my favorite sites to send beginners to is Quiet Mind Cafe: http://quietmindcafe.com/
Another place I like is Osho's website. Lots of free information and meditations, particularly touching on active/dynamic meditations that appeal more to Westerners. http://www.osho.com/ I loved his book "Meditation, the First and Last Freedom". I think it's one of the most approachable manuals for various meditation methods (as well as the whole philosophy behind meditation).
Thanks! I do practice chi gong daily and I do find it calming as well as energizing.
I'm very curious about TM just because of the claims it makes. And there are avid supporters of it like Jerry Seinfeld, Russel Brand, Ellen Degeneres and Russel Simmons.
Thanks! I do practice chi gong daily and I do find it calming as well as energizing.
I'm very curious about TM just because of the claims it makes. And there are avid supporters of it like Jerry Seinfeld, Russel Brand, Ellen Degeneres and Russel Simmons.
I look at it this way, that's the same social set that boasts a lot of people who belong to the church of Scientology.
I believe the Buddhist monks, the real Hindu gurus, the Zen masters. Meditation is about your relationship with yourself. You don't need anyone to tell you how to breath, right? Same thing.
Chi gong is FANTASTIC!! Now paying someone to teach you how to take THAT to advanced levels, yes, I can see paying for that! Perhaps maybe consider adding yoga or tai chi, as well. And try the guided meditations that give you something to listen to. Once you get the hang of those you can branch out. Seriously, the Osho book I recommended, it's like the only one anybody who wants to meditate needs. It's worth the read.
I'll tell you a trick about meditation, it's a lot like riding a bicycle. NOBODY can tell you what it feels like to have "caught" your balance, you just have to find it and once you've found it, you absolutely KNOW what it feels like. It becomes much easier to drop into that mental state (and it literally is a mental state, your brainwaves change) once you get comfortable with what you're ultimate goal is and you intuitively begin to understand how to more easily achieve that state. Over time and with practice you are able to stay in the state longer and longer. It's patience and practice, and most importantly, patience with yourself and trusting the process.
Inner Peace
