[Katbot24]

This past month I haven't gained anything, but I haven't lost much either.

I just end up sabotaging myself all the time, or school and work gets in the way of the gym and it's beginning to frustrate me. I feel like I will never get back into the swing of dieting. I'm disappointed with myself that in these past 4 months I haven't been able once to lose 10lbs in a month! I'm starting to cut myself some slack with my goals and saying "oh, I looked okay at 180lbs, which is still 16lbs over normal bmi. Maybe bmi doesn't apply to me" or "oh, I can just order my wedding dress two sizes smaller and lose the rest of the weight in the remaining 8 months, I'm sure it'll look good". I can't be firm with myself anymore and I don't know why. I've been stressed and sick a lot this month and I think that's eaten away at my motivation but I'm TERRIFIED.

I don't want to be a fat bride, I don't want to hate my wedding pictures, I don't want to choose 1 or 2 photos from 70 from my honeymoon to put on Facebook because my fat, ugly body is in the rest of them.

I'm sorry for the rant, I'm just hoping maybe verbalizing all this can help me re-motivate myself.

[valalltogether]

It's good that you haven't gained, but I understand your frustration with sitting still also. I tip my hat to you for going to school, working AND working on yourself all at once.

Maybe take a good hard look at what you're doing outside of school/work. Is it possible for you to wake up early and do a session in the morning? Remember that 15 minutes is better than nothing! I sometimes would forgo my whole gym session because it wasn't enough time for me to feel like it was worth it. Every little bit counts!!

Do what you gotta do to get motivated!! If negative is the way, maybe google "fat brides" pictures, lol!! MyFitnessPal forums have a lot of before/after success pictures just like here. Get back in the game!!

[Dreamer2012]

I'm under a lot of stress and pressure from my last year in college so I've devised a plan to just lose when I lose. I've stopped all goal weights and targets that I had set monthly. Now I'm just eating as best as I can, like always and getting a little bit of exercise in when I can. If I don't get any exercise in, I don't feel bad now. Sometimes there are more important things in life than a diet plan. At first I struggled to find the motivation to get back on track after I went back to college in September but finally at the end of October I was able to become motivated to try get back on track. I think it could have been down to changing up my plan and just losing when I lose.

In order to get yourself motivated, it takes different people different things. For yourself, I would think of your upcoming wedding. You don't want to look a certain way in your pictures. (Although I'm sure you will look stunning regardless of what weight you are! ) You don't want to only be able to pick a couple of photo's to show your friends. Think about these points that you are telling yourself and maybe reorganise your plan to something more manageable.

I went from around an hour and a half of exercise during the summer to a plan of 30 minutes on the weekdays and an hour on the weekends. Granted, some days I don't get the full time in. But like I explained, I don't feel guilty because 30 minutes is better than nothing. Heck! Even 10 or 15 minutes is better than nothing.

I was talking to a friend of mine last week about this and she was making a photo album for a friend of ours. There was a picture of me about two years ago when I would have been my highest weight of 154lbs. I thought it was the most disgusting picture of myself ever! But my friend told me not to see it like that but as motivation to keep on going! She suggested sticking it on the fridge. I didn't do it but I thought it was a good suggestion to get some motivation. And if I feel like I'm slipping, I might just have to look at pictures of me a year or two ago and see how far I've come.

[Mimi21]

Katbot24, everything you said pretty much sums up how I feel. Save for the fact that I'm not getting married (congrats by the way, I'm sure you will be a beautiful bride no matter what you weigh). I also get how writing your feelings down is a good way of getting the emotions out. I'm deeply frustrated because I've been been bouncing between 208 and 209 for weeks and I'm starting to feel like a failure.

For so long I've wanted to lose weight because I'll be comfortable and happier but I realized (thanks to a lot of therapy) that happiness isn't a destination. The truth is I'm not happy with me right now for reasons other than weight. I'm a very disorganized person who flits around through life for the most part. What I mean is that I'm seldom in the moment. I always think about tomorrow or the next moment because I see it as a chance to be happy THEN but never NOW. I'm also very dishonest with people about my feelings. I hardly ever tell people what bothers me and when they're being rude because I don't want to upset THEM. Talk about stupid. These things are another form of neglecting to take care of myself and part of the reason I turn to food but definitely not the only things.

I won't get into all of my issues but I can tell you that I've learned the most important thing is to learn to be kind to yourself. You have accomplished so much already. We look at our goal as the end but the real goal is to stay on track and to accept who and what we are. You've already done the hardest part which is to recognize something you feel you need to change about yourself in order to have a healthier and happier life. When you think of giving up, think of how far you've come and how you (and everyone who is losing weight) will be letting the people who we're supposed to take care of the most down: ourselves. If we aren't any good to ourselves, we can't truly be good to anyone else. Don't give ever give up on you!

[aka8941]

Katbot...our stats are identical. Yay stat sisters! Anyway, I've been in a rut too, and I've settled with looking "ok" for the past year or so. The thing is...until you make a conscious decision to be happier and to do things to take care of yourself, you probably won't. Getting in your exercise makes you do all of those other things BETTER. If you are working towards your goals, it shows in so many ways. Other people respond to it. They can see that you are a person that respects yourself so you are to be respected. Getting in your exercise and eating right makes you easier to be around because you LIKE yourself more.

Bottom line, if you keep going with it, you'll immediately begin to be a better employee, student, fiancee. And stop stressing about the wedding. Live in the moment, do what you can right now.

[GardenBurglar]

I know stalls are tough, but just think of how much healthier you are now than when you started. Plus, being able to say you have lost 27 pounds and been able to keep it off through stressful times is no small victory.

Stress sucks and is probably the biggest obstacle we face in this quest to become healthier versions of ourselves.

And sometimes the fastest way to get to goal is to take a break now and then.

I know that these days I have a hard time staying motivated if I concentrate too much on my appearance, but I can find motivation more readily if I focus on my health and overall wellbeing.