It makes me feel really low in every sense when I get desperate when bingeing and eat horrible things. Such as a tin of cold, uncooked kidney beans. Or ketchup, squirted on a plate, with a fork. I won't go on, I'll make myself look terrible. That was a moment of real desperation and it is NOT good for your self esteem to find yourself doing a thing like that. Makes me feel a whole lot of shame.
Does anyone else do things like this?
The problem is I try and keep binge food (potentially just about any food!) out the house, to keep temptation at bay, but the risk is I end up doing things like this It just proves binges are not enjoyable, there is no pleasaure in eating things like that. Why am I LIKE this?
xxx
there was a time, about a year and a half ago when I would do that. I understand how you feel. I would mix sugar with flour and a little water and eat it. I have actually binged on anything back then. For me, it was more about the stuffing.. eating and just not stopping. I felt really alone after those binges.
You aren't alone! I have eaten cans of corn, green beans, garbanzo beans (because that was all I had when i felt the urge to binge). I have also just stuffed my face with just about every random thing you could think of (never plain condiments but most anything else).
Are you stressed, what were you feeling thinking around the time of the binge? I notice my triggers sometimes and sometimes a binge just happens, or an insatiable hunger. Asking yourself "why" is the first step to recognizing what is going on. *hugs* I know how miserable binging can make you feel both physically and mentally. Try to pin down what is going on. Also, what I have done is to make sure that I ALWAYS have bags of frozen veggies in the freezer, if you put them in a bowl in the microwave for a few minutes they are pretty well cooked and low in calories. Also, frozen fruit is a nice treat. Kidney beans aren't terrible for you but are a little high in carbs.
I have also eaten a tin of garbanzo beans, aaaagh! It was a few years ago. When I was a teenager I ate food out the bin a few times even!! That is really really bad isn't it? As you say, Amygdala, it is just about stuffing yourself, no pleasure in eating it.
Yeah, I suppose when i feel lonely and empty it is worst I don't know why I am like this. I wish I wasn't.
Although I do not consider myself a binger (based on the definitions I've seen and the experiences I've read about), just a perpetual overeater with some disordered eating habits, I know that you are not alone in doing the behaviors you've described. I remember on another forum some poster admitted to eating a frozen pizza on the way home from the grocery store (yes, the pizza was still frozen).
Although, as I mentioned, I don't binge, I do often have to keep trigger foods out of the house to avoid eating them, and when I really, really want something, I'll start eating foods that wouldn't traditionally tempt me. Then, I get angry that I've wasted my calories on that food when I could have had something I really wanted.
Oh yeah, frozen pizza, i've done that. That was a mistake. For one thing it gave me awful tummy ache, and another, my sister found out- not just that I'd eaten it, but frozen. That was humiliating. I don't think there is much could shock me, I've done it all just about.
xxx
I am so sorry you feel this way. I just hope that you know that you are just as worthy as anyone else of every thing a person could deserve. I hope you are not punishing yourself for feelings of inadequacy by overstuffing yourself with food. I am just going off of my own experiences, because I know I do things like this when I am feeling down on myself. I saw someone on here one time kept a journal of their binges. They wrote down what they ate, how much, and what was happening right before the binge. I know if I am feeling lonely I sometimes want to feel that feeling of being really full, so I can feel something like comfort, even if it is just discomfort. I hope you feel better, and remember that you can always come here for support.
I've eaten cans of uncooked ravioli before.. NOT pleasurable at all and oh so embarrassing.. I dont know why I just didnt cook it but there you have it. I know so weird.. I hope that makes you feel better.. you are defiantly NOT alone.
Been there, done that and had the indigestion, upset stomach and the sadness that went with it. I thought food was my friend. Take back the power JoseLo. You can do this. I did. If you are dealing with other emotional issues at the same time, pick your battle and deal with one at a time until you have a handle on it. Lots of lovely support here.
JoseLo, most of us have probably done things we are ashamed of concerning food. I think the first thing is to learn what emotions trigger your binges and work on those emotions. Something is making you feel miserable, and you eat to compensate --and as a consequence feel even worse!
It may help to eat very low carb for some days so you reduce your cravings and think more clearly.
And if you are really feeling too bad, get counselling... You deserve to feel fine and to be in control of your life.
Visting these forums will help, you'll see!
Last edited by inglesita64; 06-09-2012 at 11:57 AM.
Oh no, it happened again tonight
I am waiting on counselling and group support referral from the dr but in the mean time still struggling. I don't even want to write it because if anyone sees and is cross at me
xxxx
I hope you get the help you need. I am sorry you struggle with food. I have had times where I had binges, but they seem to be better now, for the most part. There is hope. Just don't give up! Feel better.
I had a period in my 20s when I went on epic binges, but never in my life have I binged on foods I didn't love. However, my behaviour was disordered in other ways: I would spend the entire day taking the bus from one gourmet eatery to another (all planned out in advance) to pick up all my favourite foods, then eat the whole thing within about an hour in the evening.
I totally understand this.. :/
When I'm binging its litterally like "How can I get more calories in my mouth?" For instance I dont really enjoy chocolate... When I'm binging, if theres chocolate surup in the frige I'm pouring it in coffee, on bread, its pretty gross. Sometimes things will take to long to cook, and I'll eat them non heated (soup, frozen waffles, hot pockets...) My least favorite food is mapple surup. A few days ago I found myself SOAKING my waffles in surup and downing them hating evrey bite, but not being able to stop :/ I'm lactose intolerent, and I'll sit down and eat all the cheese/yougurt I can, and feel so gross and bloated, and STILL shove more down my throat.. I'll even eat something stale if I'm stressed out enough
Its bad if I decide to calculatre calories later.. I'm over like... "why? just why?"
I only conciously think "more calories" if I've been restricting lately... hope evreythings going alright in your life hon :/
~cheers and good luck
Have you tried to analyze what emotional state makes you want to do this? Understanding myself helped me quit bingeing --so far, at least. Try to be aware of how you feel before the binge...
Really Low
It just proves binges are not enjoyable, there is no pleasaure in eating things like that. Why am I LIKE this? 
