[Nebuchadnezzar]

Good old Blue Oyster Cult. Or...kinda.

So! Uhm, as a 300+ poundah, I wonder if anyone has this in common with me: absolute mirror fear. Its like I know by now I am huge. However, I can't stand being reminded of it. Does anyone else but me look in a mirror and cringe?

I go a step further: when I walk by a full length mirror to enter a room, closet or bathroom I have instinctively closed the eye congruent with the mirror as I pass it. One glance at my anatomy and my whole day could come crashing down like "Oh god oh god I'm fat..." Because I will have been having fun doing something and accidentally caught a glimpse of how I look. It's easy to forget you are twice to thrice the weight of all your friends while you are having a good time! Then someone asks for one of my custom cocktails, I get up with a grin and BAM...Oh god, is that me?

I can handle the shoulders up fine. Below that and I get triggered to bury my sudden morose feelings in foods. I see me every day. I feel it, I know the fat is there. But every time I am visually reminded, I just sink like the Titanic. Even I have done the "My face is rocking, but my body is a total Monet!" thing thought I hate the "such s pretty face" people. It bothers me a lot more lately because I am so eager to lose this mess, and my little weight loss (obviously) hasn't shown up anywhere yes. My friend Eddie calls me Jennifer Connelly Muppet, since she breaks a mirror in just about every movie she's in.

I can't be the only one rendered completely neurotic to the point of superstition by mirrors, can I?

[shannonmb]

I love that song.

And I also hate looking in the mirror. I have become very good at diverting my eyes if I have to walk past a mirror or window reflection. So good that it actually shocks me when I see myself. Pictures?? Ahhhh!

Lately I've been trying to make an effort to go ahead and look. I'm not fooling anyone but myself when I refuse to acknowledge what's going on -- and I'm so determined now to make it to goal that I am willing to literally stare the problem down, admit where I was, where I am, and just keep looking to see the changes as they happen. It is very hard, though. VERY hard!

[mmel3283]

I do the same exact thing...I avoid mirrors at all costs. I'll have a day where I feel good about myself...and then if I look in a full length mirror...it's shot.


Hopefully soon that will all change.

[JackieHollow]

I do the same thing!! There are actually no full length mirrors in my house at all. So no worries there.

We went to the zoo a couple weeks ago, and I was having a great time. Admiring my hottie husband (who has lost 80 lbs and still going) and sending him "that" look all day. Having fun and goofing off with my kids. Just a good time all around. Then... the glass door shot my image back at me, just like a mirror out of the blue. It CRUSHED my day. I felt absolutely horrible and disgusted the rest of the day.

[mmel3283]

Damn glass doors...I hate those...

[caryesings]

Mine was photographs. I think friends and family thought I was over-reacting but I honestly was sent into a tailspin when I'd see photos of myself at my highest weight (which I was at for 20 years so a whole segment of my life not recorded in pictures).

[Pacifica Bee]

OH yeah, I never looked in a full length mirror other than quick glances to make sure my clothes were on straight or whatever. Now I am constantly looking in the mirror and at reflections. I have "who is that.. oh its me!" moments which is awesome. Just this morning I was looking in the reflection of the sliding glass door and was thinking "that thing must be distorted" so I went to a mirror in the house and nope! That is the way I look now. The mirror repulsion will definitely go away as the weight comes off

[JackieHollow]

I'll be glad when I hit the spot where I can see my reflection and be surprised and HAPPY when I see my reflection. I've lost almost 40 lbs and see NO difference. I'm hiping within the next 40... I'll see something anyway.

[Nebuchadnezzar]

WOW.

Seems like every day I learn that more and more people have the same tics I have. I seriously thought I was insane. D8 This is why a fatty needs someone to relate to, you know?

I wonder if other people have to put a pillow over their belly when they sit down, too?!

*amazed*

[caryesings]

Originally Posted by Nebuchadnezzar

WOW.


I wonder if other people have to put a pillow over their belly when they sit down, too?!

A lot of people. I listed this one in a thread earlier this year about automatic behaviours many of us had because of fat and got a lot of agreement.

[Nebuchadnezzar]

I definitely hope to experience this. Like....super eager to. I dont like that I hate mirrors so much. Doesnt seem right.

[Deena52]

What I hated was dressing room mirrors. They were 10 times worse than regular mirrors. Add the horrible lighting in them and it was a total nightmare. Nothing like going in there with an armload of things to try on, hopeful that something might look decent, and every single one looking horrible on me. I would just sit down on the bench in there and cry.

And the worst was when I was under pressure to have to buy something dressy for an event like a family wedding, etc.....and each item I tried on looked even worse in the mirror than the one before it. And I was sweating and crying and starting to panic....and trying to figure out if there was any way I could get out of attending.

I remember buying this absolutely hideous pantsuit for my youngest sister's wedding back in 2006...because it was the only thing in the store that fit me half decently. Fit me but was just hideous. But I was desperate at that point.

But oh, you are going to love the mirror soon. My son's wedding in August...and was wearing a size 10 gown that looked absolutely fabulous in the mirror. Loved the mirror and loved the photos. You are going to love it....believe me. That alone is worth staying motivated and on plan for. No more being just fine and having a mirror or a family event send you into a tailspin and ruining your day...and your mood. Just keep reminding yourself of that.

deena