[forestroad]

I just realized I haven't started a thread in ages. Warning, I am about to get my Stuart Smalley on so if you are a jaded cynic, turn back now!

So, I'm "at goal" but I still battle this eating disorder mentality where I think if I could just lose 5 more lbs, I'd love my body (some people think like this and it has nothing to do with ED but mine stems from an old ED). I know that if I lost those 5lbs, I'd just start the same thought process over and not be happy till I'd lost 5 more, and could see myself getting very unhealthy that way.

My body seems to naturally like it between 130-135; I think this is just a good weight for me and I am really fighting the urge to go lower, bc I do know that 125 would just turn into 118 and so on and I'd never be happy.

So now that I'm here, I'm trying to arrive at "happy" differently, by accepting all parts of me. I store my essential body fat in my love handles and my lower abdomen and upper thighs, and the thing about "essential body fat" is that obviously you never lose it because you need it to survive. So I have these parts of my body that are not conventionally attractive, and I am striving to embrace them as just as beautiful as the rest of me. I don't think I'm more beautiful than anyone else, just that I am as beautiful and deserving and worthy as the next person. And obviously weight loss isn't going to make my complexion better or my teeth whiter or my hair prettier.

I'm grateful for what I do have, and realize that I walk through this world with a lot of privilege. Whether or not I fit some standard definition of "pretty", I'm still beautiful, I'm still really lucky, and I'm still me. And I can appreciate my self worth without having to believe I'm conventionally attractive, and I don't have to ascribe to conventional notions of beauty, either.

What parts of yourself are you working on accepting, because you can't (or don't want to) change them through weight loss?

[possiblesuccess]

I don't think that there is anyhing physically that I am working on at this point. I'm just trying to be more confident in myself. I always thought that I would be more confident after I lost weight. But I am learning that I need to be confident no matter how much I weigh. I've kind of noticed that in order for me to be successful in the things happening in my life right now, I have to be confident. If I want to do well in my training at work right now, I have to be confident that I can do well. If I want to improve my social life, I need to have the confidence to go out and meet new people and make new friends. And the biggest thing, is that in order to lose this weight for good, I need to believe that I can do it.

[redliss7]

Yeah, I don't really have a problem with anything because its too big per se. Granted, I'm not always pleased with my shoulders; however, that's a function of frame and weightloss will only make them push out. I just kind of want to reach a healthy bmi weight because I've never been there before. I'm actually pretty pleased with all of my body. Especially because my body fat percentage is spot on and pretty low for what its worth. I just really want the number. lol....that and to be toward the bottom of the median for my rowing team weight wise.lol.

[amaniesa]

I love the sentiment of this thread. I think having a strong image of my body makes me want to eat the healthy foods and exercise. It makes me think that my body (inside and out) is worth the extra effort. eating junk is no longer as attractive to me becuase I know it's crap, and my body (my heart, my organs etc) are worth way more than that.

As far as particular body parts, I have always disliked the size of my legs, but they're becoming stronger and I that makes me feel good.