Like many of us, I've struggled with my weight all my life. I'm forty now. Not taking into account some short spans of a thinner self, I've been overweight since my childhood. Actually, now I'm obese, not just overweight anymore.
I think the main difficulty is exactly the fact that I've always been like that. I have almost nothing to look back to, no place to return to. I have to make something new, which feels like an impossibility. When I dream I could be different, a deeper self dictates that I shall not. All the past failures present themselves as proof that it can't be done.
Yet, I can't give up. That's why I've turned to this forum, hoping that the support of others will help.
As you can see from my name, I'm from Greece. English is not my mother tongue, so I guess that sometimes what I write sounds awkward to a native speaker.
Hi Niki, and welcome aboard! Your English is very, very good, way better than my Greek! I know what you mean, I don't have a skinny former self to go back to either. Actually, when I look at photos of myself in my teens, I was smaller than now, but I was ALWAYS told that I was fat, since age 8 or 9. But creating a new self is a little scary too... I came back to this site after a break, and I'm looking forward to sharing the journey with others, maybe that will make it a little less scary? Good luck!
Thanks everybody for your warm welcome. It feels good to be part of a community where people are struggling to achieve the same goal. It's also inspiring to see that other people are doing soooo well. Amazing!
We have a 40 something forum if you would like to check it out.
Your English is GREAT!
I understand the trepidation about the reinvention of self. For all my life, I never exercised, was never athletic, I always focused on my intellectual side. But then I unleashed this inner athlete that I never knew I had. I believe you can make your dreams come true.
I know what you mean when you say you focused on your intellectual side. I did the same. Maybe I did this in order to counterbalance my poor looks, who knows? When other girls bought clothes and make up, I bought books and records. Anyway, this part of myself I am satisfied with, whatever the reasons that made me turn to intellectual pursuits.
It's very encouraging to see that other people who are struggling on the same issues have made such progress. Thanks for sharing that with me.
Hi Niki,
welcome to 3FC. there are so many of us in the same boat!
I am 50 and I am still trying to figure out who I am, or who I want to be.
This is a great place to find support though and don't worry about your English. you're doing fine
hope to see you here again soon!
Hi, Niki. I'm new to this site too. From what you wrote it sounds as if you place all your self worth on your looks, and that is being very unfair to yourself! I know you are more than that. The weight is just one thing you need to work on to help yourself become healthier and happier. Everyone has things they need to work on! You are lucky yours is something you can change. And think of it like this: all your past attempts at losing weight were not failures; they were merely practice.
I have to create a new self
I know what you mean, I don't have a skinny former self to go back to either. Actually, when I look at photos of myself in my teens, I was smaller than now, but I was ALWAYS told that I was fat, since age 8 or 9. But creating a new self is a little scary too... I came back to this site after a break, and I'm looking forward to sharing the journey with others, maybe that will make it a little less scary? Good luck! 
