I have seen several threads here from fellow low-carbers who ate something or a few things that were not appropriate for their level of diet. It is always distressing to see others wondering if they have completely messed up. I have been there myself. Sometimes it can lead to total abandonment of the diet. However, I am in the middle of re-reading Living the Low Carb Life and found something for everyone to consider.
"Take the word cheat out our your vocabulary. Cheating implies lying or dishonesty. It's much more empowering to think about the low-carb lifestyle in terms of being strict and not so strict."
If you are telling us what you are eating then you are not being dishonest. You still have to be accountable to yourself and any weight loss buddies you have about what you are eating. You still input all your food into any food tracker that you use. You still have to remember certain foods will not help you get to goal.
Even the terms on plan and off plan are better for your mind set than saying cheating. I usually refer to those times as falling off the wagon.
So, we should all focus on changing our vocabulary and attitude toward eating.
If anyone thinks they are cheating and refer to their cheating here in the forums, I do not have a problem with that. How we feel as individuals is strictly up to each of us.
I think ban may be a harsh word, and a place we don't want to go, but I agree that we should challenge ourselves and others to be less stressed over glitches and imperfections in our plans. Expecting progress rather than perfection, is generally the biggest difference between those who succeed and those who fail.
Kaplods you are awesome. Yeah, ban is strong but once I realized that it was too late to change the header. Maybe moratorium.
We should all think about how we view ourselves and the things we say about ourselves. We should change our attitude about how we deal with everyday life and the challenges we all must face living imperfectly in an imperfect world.
I think this is a very sensible idea! Because, really, vocabulary does shape how we conceptualize who we are and what we're doing, and changing the vocabulary you use can genuinely make an impact on your success.
I was really struck by this when I read the Weightwatchers Handbook - they are really sensible about this stuff. Going around saying "I'll never eat another doughnut", or "I will always go to the gym on a Saturday" can really help reinforce feelings of failure if you AREN'T perfect. I'd never thought about it until I read their chapter on the subject, but it really struck a chord with me - because I can be pretty all-or-nothing about any endeavour in my life, so if I screw up or let myself down, then often I just think "sod it, I'm a failure. I'm not playing this game any more." and let things snowball - rather than thinking "okay, why did this happen, and how can I make sure that this situation doesn't arise again?", and getting back on the damn horse.
Similarly, I do agree that cheating is a misleading term, and that it reflects a mindset that isn't neccesarily helpful. I feel the same way about the rather religious language that's often associated with trying to lose weight - talking in terms of 'sinning' and 'virtuousness' and so forth. I just don't think it's a helpful paradigm because it undermines YOU as the central authority and motivator behind your weightloss plan. This isn't something that is being done to you, or something you can cheat on - this is you, changing your body and your life. You're not abiding by some kind of external moral code, or doing a test that someone else is making you endure - you're the one in control.
If you choose to eat a potato/drink a glass of wine/whatever*, then you aren't cheating, imho - you're making a choice, in the knowledge that it isn't helping you achieve your longterm goals. If you let this snowball (or, in WW terminology, let a lapse become a RElapse, and then, heaven forfend, a total COLlapse) then it's a problem - but if it's a one-off thing, then I say it's not worth weeping and wailing and gnashing teeth over. Just get back on the damn horse.
Ask yourself whether it's really more important to enjoy this treat than it is to lose weight this week, and if it is (and sometimes it is, you know), then consciously give yourself permission. I mean, it's not like the Diet Police are going to come and get you! You're deviating from the quickest path to weightloss, but you're not actually cheating, imho.
(That said - if you've successfully lost a shedload of weight, and feel that this terminology IS useful to you - well, more power to your elbow, and shut the **** up, Fay!)
*I did both this weekend, incidentally - the wine I don't regret, but the potato I do.
Last edited by broadabroad; 03-17-2008 at 03:20 AM.
Great Thread! I'm profoundly affected by the mind-body connection & have made the switch from the negative impact word "cheating" - to the thought of being "off-plan." I'm now working on OWNING my choices too Fay . . . I Posted this awhile back and thought those here interested in this topic/mindset may benefit from Kae's take:
Also was inspired over @ Livin'LaVidaLowCarb - Jimmy Moore interviewed Kae Whang from Season 4 of TBLoser? I thought this part was really pertinent for me:
KW: "On my MySpace page, I put up my mottos, which are: Make it simple! It can be VERY overwhelming that you have to lose 30 to 100 pounds and thinking that you have to do SO much exercise and eat boring food. STOP!
Take it ONE day at a time, or even ONE moment at a time. Think about what you want to do TODAY. What is going on NOW? And the simple part is that all you have to say is, YES or NO. Will I make myself feel good and workout? YES or NO? Is that piece of food worth eating? YES or NO? If I eat it, will I work it off in the gym? YES or NO? Am I going to live my life with fullness? YES or NO? Am I happy? YES or NO?
MAKE A CHOICE and OWN IT (never regretting your decisions). Choose one or the other, do NOT go to the gray area where you start thinking too much (like I said before) and let all that negative noise will play with your mind and take up too much valuable time.
FORGIVE yourself and LET GO of the past. The more you embrace life and enjoy this journey, the more motivated you are to keep going. That is what I’ve learned--to be positive and get back on your feet if you fallen.
FOCUS on your goal, and why you are doing it. Remind yourself that YOU ARE WORTH IT, and that you DESERVE the BEST! You must love and respect yourself to live life to the fullest. Like attracts like, so if you are feeling great, great things will be attracted to you (and the same with the opposite).
YOU CHOOSE how your life is, by choosing how you are going to react to it. Don’t be a victim. It takes you no where and it only takes up valuable time. No more excuses. Just do it. And passionately know that it will come true! Be active. AND LOVE LIFE!"
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Bottom line here is....when you "cheat" on your eating plan...you are only "cheating" 1 person...YOU!!
"You Can Not Change What You Refuse To Acknowledge"
A Moratorium On The Word Cheating Here
yet with the title 
