Big

I have been struggling lately. Just eating crap, crap and more crap...........and it doesn't help me feel any better, just makes it worse........So why do I do this?????? Very scary to do things that you think your doing to make you feel better and instead it makes you feel worse.......

Anyways, I just wanted to come "clean" so to speak.

Sassy_chick: my feelings exactly. Alcoholics probably say the same thing. After every binge, my face looks 10 times fatter to me in the mirror ... it all becomes distorted by guilt and fear, yet I can only resolve to be good for a few days and then the binges return.

I've been really on a downward turn ever since mid December.
Today, after dinner I had:
14 slices light wheat bread = 640
4 slices turkey ham = 100
4 slices provolone cheese = 280
1.5 cup skim ricotta cheese = 400
apple 80
tomato sauce 60
~1600