Hi Everyone

Today, I was chatting with my 14 year old who wants to lose a bit of weight. I was sharing with her how tough it is when you have as much to lose as I do. She asked me, "Mom, why don't you go back to 3FC?" Hmmmm.....smart girl! So, as I sit here typing, I'm also downloading the software for my new BodyMedia armband. I bought some yummy fresh veggies today and I'm ready to do this. I'm scared, but ready. I've been reading through the last few weeks of posts and this looks like an ideal place for me. I hope you all don't if I jump in. I recognize some of you and I'm looking forward to getting to know everyone else. I may not always have time to chat, but I'm committed to checking in each day and being supportive. Please feel free to give me a kick in the pants when waranted!

Hey everyone, thanks for all the support and shared experiences and wisdom. I think you're right and everything is getting to me with life and work pressure and everything and it was just not the day... Sigh. I didn't in fact descend into binge nation and lose myself for the weekend. Friday ended up being quite sensible actually, and I was soooo busy travelling over the weekend that there wasn't much time for food. I got home exhausted but somehow got suckered into making celebratory gluten-free banana bread muffins because "oh but we have these bananas that have turned nearly black and when life gives you overripe bananas, you just have to make banana bread." Sigh. They're about 170 calories a muffin which is fine but then I had two which took me to about 1800 calories for the day which is just a smidge under maintenance calories so le sigh on that. The scale is BARELY cooperating and dropped only 0.5lbs last week although I am still in the low 180s at 182, a weight I was BEGGING for just a couple of weeks ago so there is that.

JenJenAngel007: Yay on the interview!!! AND THE 2TEENS!!!!

LaurieDawn: It took a moment for me to realize who the Kitty Cat Dolls were... LOLOLOLOL I can't even with the censorship. I like to work out to that kind of music too- Britney, PCD, "old" Gaga, Ke$ha- that sort of thing and strangely enough emo post-grunge/Southern Rock stuff as well so I get what you're saying about music and it's magic powers. Yay on taking the 190s by storm!!! Go you!!!

Uber: The early 240s are coming for you. Just keep plugging away. I've been on plan (or better, calorie-wise) apart from 2 mild binge days and the scale isn't cooperating either. But we'll stick it out till we make it!

Ferafilia: I'm with you all the way on food and taste. It's not worth it to me choking down something I'm not enjoying- Hershey's chocolate and Reese's pieces, I'm talking to you! Vegetables are the only thing I make an extra effort with because they're good for me and I like to eat a lot in quantity and veggies help me do that. The challenge has been making them taste like something I want to enjoy and 5 years in, I'm finally winning.

Lotus: I'm sorry you're ill again. Life, busyness and the immunosuppressants are probably all tho do with it. Do you take vitamins or supplements? I've found they've really helped me a lot with allergies and my former propensity for catching every cold and stomach bug passing.

Slashni: Hang in there with Uber and I. Being stuck is a milion times better than regaining weight. We'll make it happen. Just stick with it. If losing weight was easy, then everyone would be in the Rockstar Superhero club like we are, but it's not, so we stay exclusive and special because we keep at it even though it's hard and frustrating at times and our histories, food issues and environmental factors are stacked against us. Or something. That's what I tell myself.

GirlyGirlSebas: Welcome back to 3FC! I think we've all had those "I need to get back on 3FC" moments, usually after falling way off where we used to be. Yay on being here. Looking forward to getting to know you. You know you can do this!

Alright everyone, have a wonderful day!

Good morning!

Toasted - Thank you for the welcome back. And, Congratulations on losing .5 for the week. I know it's not what you were hoping for, but it's still a success.

I need to remember that there will never be a perfect time to get on-plan. There will always be work stress, family stress, an upcoming event or just not feeling well. I stayed up too late last night and my butt is dragging this morning. My first thought was "Oh crap, I need to put on the armband and get going. But, it's Monday and it's going to be a stressful day at work and probably not the best day to start this." I can't do this to myself anymore. So, I'm starting.

Hope everyone has a great on-plan day!

Hi everyone!

Diane - Isn't it amazing how much people know about losing weight and how helpful they are about sharing all of their experience?

Laurie - I'm so glad your head's in a good place, regardless of what the scale does or doesn't say. While I was taking my hiatus I popped on and read something that you wrote for Uber - along the lines of why we get in these eating phases being an important question to ask, but sometimes it's more important to just get back on plan and then explore the whys of it all from a safer distance. Thank you so much for writing that. It really stuck with me and helped me get back on plan.

Toasted - I'm sorry you had a hard time with your intern. I work with younger people and... well... I get it. I do. I don't think the occasional flip out is a bad thing (keeps 'em on their toes), but I am sorry it ended up boomeranging back on you and making you feel bad.

Jenni - Congratulations on making it to the second round of interviews!!

Uber - The 240s suck. They just do. The 260s suck pretty hard as well. There are some decades that are prettier than others but I don't think either of us are in our happy fat place. I'm also getting squishy, droopy fat which is just depressing and just leaves me with this sense of... really? seriously, life? the cherry on top of my cake right now is some pretty gross looking inner thigh sag?

Mandy - I do that with the calorie bank as well. It's not something that comes naturally to me, but it does feel like a really responsible way of taking care of myself.

Lotus -

Rhonda - Hello! Welcome!

When it comes to eating I've been in this weird eat-whatever-I-want place. I haven't been binging and I don't quite know how to describe what was going on in terms of my relationship with food.

I'm back up to 268.2 and that could all very well be fat and not sodium or bloat. That's fine, though. I mean it's not great, but I'm not going to say "I gained 6lb in two weeks so **** it, I might as well gain another 24 just to call it even."

I'm glad to see that everyone is doing so well!

GirlyGirSebas: Yay on getting started today even though not feeling like it. It's those baby steps. I actually like my job but I have never woken up in the morning excited to go there. I'm always dragging in the morning. It's like a battle of wills to get up and get ready and go to work but I do it because I have to and I guess that's how it is right now with you and weight loss. Don't worry that you're not dancing with excitement killing it your first day. It's commitment more than motivation that is going to get you where you're going. You can do this. What's your plan of attack for the day/week?

martini: Thanks for understanding! I'm so sorry that you're having a rough time because of circumstances although I'm glad, you're discovering the love around you in spite of that, mixed blessings-stylee. Sometimes, it takes rough times to make us realize how blessed we are with the people around us and to show us what and who's really important. I'm glad you're back on plan and are so balanced about everything. Life happens, recovering and moving forward is what's important. SO yay Day 3! And here's to Day 4!

Okay people, I think maybe, just maybe my busy time might be slowing down a bit. Today was the shoot of our final script, the one whose issues I was dealing with in Friday's flip out and it went well... But now I'm exhausted and crashing from the lack of sleep and the go-go-go of this weekend. I'm still doing alright with food. Today is a fast days and I've been doing well at sticking to those even when the hunger monster in beating down the door. This is approach-to-TOM week which is when I'm usually insatiably hungry (for carbs) so I'm going to have to find some way to creatively deal with that in advance.

I hope you all are doing well today and wish everyone a perfect on plan day!

Wow. Busy 24 hours on here. Love it.

Rhonda - I remember you from when I was on here before with my old ID (konfyoozed - I think)! I came back, too, when I realized something needed to change, and how awesome this site is. Then I stumbled on this group and couldn't be happier with the support here. You picked a wonderful spot to land!

I am currently in the process of dealing with my completely off-track weekend. I made plans and rules and followed them for the most part, but I forgot to factor in all the yummy stuff that would be given to us (and left over from my own efforts) and, well, yesterday was kind of a bust. Anyway. Since I'm noticing a bit of a pattern with my weekends with all the various fall/winter holidays stuff coming up, Friday through Sunday are becoming a bit of "relaxed" affair when it comes to food. So, I think I might try 5:2 again, and have Monday (for recovery) and Thursday (to prepare) be "fast" days and keep Tuesday and Wednesday to a-bit-lower-than-normal calories, like 1200-1400 to make sure my weekends average out properly. I'm starting this today, so we shall see how it works.

Be back later, probably when 4pm rolls around and I want to gnaw on the furniture but can't eat until 7pm.

Good morning everybody.

So guess who FINALLY got a scale whoosh? 246!

So, I really really really feel good about this, not just because of the whoosh itself, but also because I had kind of a crappy weekend. I was pretty down on both Sat and Sun due to some family issues, and both days I really wanted to exercise, but never got free to do it. By the end of yesterday, I had the yucky skin crawling feeling that I get when I'm really stressed. But I had committed to staying on plan through the weekend no matter what and I did it. Last night, I was wearing my size 22 capris that were too small at the beginning of my journey. They're pretty loose now, but last night, I noticed that the crotch was hanging too low, and I thought "I MUST be losing weight...these pants are getting too big..." and TA-DA!

One more pound and I hit my mini-mini goal of 245 which is 40 lbs total lost (this go round, 50 down from my high weight of 295 back in 2009)

What was especially awesome was that yesterday I only ate food I REALLY liked. I made grits for my dad for breakfast, and it made me crave grits but normally I don't eat breakfast-- just coffee with milk. So I reheated the grits for lunch and it just HIT THE EXACT SPOT while being fully on plan. Then, for dinner, pizza! I don't like it all the time, but sometimes it's just so good. And voila, instead of being punished for eating food I like (which is what my weird brain tells me will happen) I whooshed down two!

Rhonda I remember you! Welcome back! As you can see, I've morphed from "3FC poster child of perfect weight loss" to struggling reloser. 3FC was a big part of my success last time around, and I'm SO HAPPY to have found this awesome group of supportive ladies. I feel like I'm always just on the verge of drowning, and one of them always comes to the rescue. I understand exactly what you mean about how hard it is to restart. But the only thing I can say is that the hardest part of restarting is having the courage to restart. All of us here have been exactly where you are and started out with uncourageous baby steps on a day that seemed like it might not be the best day. Happy that you are here!

Martini I so understand what you are saying about abandoning the things that you know can help you when the times get tough, as that is exactly what I do too. One thing that gave me some insight was when I read an article that posited that our self-control is actually a finite resource requiring a great deal of mental energy that we can use up, rather than a resource that like a muscle gains strength when it is flexed. This made a lot of sense to me. The more of my energy is going to worrying about things outside of weight loss, the less energy gets directed at weight loss. And you're right, why is it that the 240s and the 260s are so blah? I carry my weight in my belly and I've got a dreadful pannus (thanks a lot, 4 kids...) I'm dealing with this mentally by promising myself to get a consult about getting a tummy tuck when I get back to 180s-190s. I doubt I would ever do plastic surgery, but just telling myself that I could look into it helps me not worry about it in the here and now.

Toasted Hooray for staying on plan all weekend! Boo to black bananas that just need to be made into muffins... but no reason you can't incorporate into your day, if you plan. It is hard to work hard and barely see the scale move!!! But every week that you lose a little is a week well spent!

DianeOh my gosh, don't you just want to SLAP people sometimes! I remember last time around, after I'd lost about 80 pounds or so, this doctor that I worked with started trying to get me to come to his office to go on the HCG diet. I mean, really? First off, the HCG diet is pretty much of a quack thing as far as I know, and second, wasn't I actually demonstrating that I knew how to lose weight? Now that I think about it, he probably wanted me to do the HCG diet so that he could point to me and say to other people "look how well my expensive unproven therapy works..." What a jerk! Sorry that you're having a little trouble getting back on track. Myself anything that knocks me out of my groove makes it a bit harder to get back. One step at a time and you'll be past it.

Lotus Being so busy and exhausted and sick is really really hard!!!! But just keep checking back in. You are priming the pump and hopefully when things settle down for you a bit you'll hit your stride. In my own personal experience, the absolute hardest time to tackle weight loss is when I'm too busy with work. You are NOT GAINING, which means you're maintaining, which is something you should give yourself credit for. You may not be maintaining at the weight you want, but you are not resorting to an eating style that would make you gain. I call that good work!

Mandy Yup. Why would we park at a certain weight for ages and then see the scale drop by 2 or 3 overnight. That happens to me all the time! When you think about it, we don't EXACTLY weigh anything, it's always about a 3 pound range. In any case, yesterday, I practiced savoring each bite of my food! Trying to learn to eat Mandy-style!

Late check-in today, and I think I missed yesterday entirely. So much going on since my last post! I LOVE that!

First - Rhonda! I am thrilled that you are here. The last I remember, you were going from being a long-time work-at-home employee (for an insurance company?) to going back to a more traditional work structure. Hope you're loving it. And YAY for baby steps. It is that first cluster of days that is so hard. And you're here. Doing it. Even when you don't feel like it. As so many have said, that is the recipe for success.

UBER - It is so about time you got that much-deserved scale whoosh! And I love, love, love that your day was filled with perfect food. I always worry about sounding condescending when I say this, but please forgive me, for I can't help myself. I am so proud of you! You had so much patience going through all of this. I love that you have finally gotten the scale reward for it.

Martini - I am so glad you're back! And what Uber says makes so much sense to me. When things are hard, I, too, tend to abandon the things that make life better. I always wondered if it was self-punishment, a variation on the impulse to cut. But the self-control muscle seems to make more sense. Doing good things can be tiring. And - WOW - you are dealing with a tremendous amount of stress right now. The work situation imploding and family drama so intense that it resulted in police intervention? I am so impressed at the grace with which you're handling it all. And I love that you just accepted the gain (whether fat or a combination of many things) as part of life. It happens to even the most weight-conscious people on the planet. You're right. The key is to focus in and keep going.

Toasted - Great news from you too! Glad work is finally slowing down and that you didn't spend the weekend in bed eating. The scale cooperation thing -- that part isn't great. But I trust that it's just a matter of time until it starts moving appropriately. And thank you for saying the following:

Being stuck is a milion times better than regaining weight. We'll make it happen. Just stick with it. If losing weight was easy, then everyone would be in the Rockstar Superhero club like we are, but it's not, so we stay exclusive and special because we keep at it even though it's hard and frustrating at times and our histories, food issues and environmental factors are stacked against us. Or something. That's what I tell myself.

It was what I needed to hear today.

Mandy - I feel like I compliment you a lot, and it seems to be both fun and accurate, so I'll stick with it. I love that you acknowledge a blip off plan, then immediately plan on how to deal with it next time. I also love that you acknowledge that there are times when you want to chew the furniture. There are ways of making being on plan a delightful experience, but there's no denying that there are pieces of misery sprinkled in. I just know that being off plan has more misery than being on plan.

Jenni - I am dying to know how your interview went! You don't say when it's scheduled. And I hope that you have successfully fought off the sickness that was threatening.

Lotus - What a trio of challenges. Too much work, too much getting sick, and an autoimmune disorder. I'm totally with Uber, though. With that much going on, maintaining is a victory. A while ago, we had an extended discussion on this thread about whether we were "making excuses" during periods of time when we weren't actively losing weight. I fervently believe that there are times when we have more energy for this and times when we just don't. When I went up to 278 pounds (my highest weight ever), I literally spent three months where I scheduled 3 nights a week as all-nighters because I knew that I couldn't get through what I needed to get done unless I did it. There's never a perfect time to lose weight, but maintaining through challenging times contributed mightily to long-term success.

Diane - Getting back on track can be so hard. And yet, I reiterate Toasted's words that I re-posted above. It's pushing through the challenging times that make us the rock stars we are! And you, my friend, are unquestionably a rock star!

197.0. And not only was I perfectly on plan with food yesterday, but I threw in a 2.5 mile run on top of my heavy weight lifting. And the weight still went up 0.4 pounds. =/ And I just looked back at my log. I weighed 202.4 on October 1. Very slow progress this month. And I am still in the obese category by BMI, and will have to drop another 18 pounds before I dip into the "overweight" category and 48 before hitting "normal weight." Which maybe should discourage me, but not at all today, because...

I am in ONEDERLAND and have worked (not consistently, but persistently) 2.5 years to get here! I put on my size 16 black dress pants this morning, and discovered I couldn't keep the shirt tucked in because they were so loose. So, I bought size 14 black dress pants. I looked at the waist and thought it was impossibly tiny, but didn't have time to try it on, and it was the same brand and store I got my size 16 pants from. So, I bought them, having faith that I would fit into them soon if I didn't fit into them now. But, instead, I am wearing them. And there's a gap at the waist. I, too, have an unsightly pannus (thanks, 6 kids, including a C-section ;-) ), and I pair that with an extra large derriere, so I almost always have a gap. But the pants fit! As does the size 12 blazer that I am wearing. (And, actually, that's loose on everything but my bulky shoulders.) Plus, my scale tells me that I have 141 pounds of lean mass in my body. If that is accurate (and who knows, really?), if I maintain my muscle mass and drop another 22 pounds of fat, my body fat percentage will be 20%. According to the ACE Body Fat % chart, average is 25-31%, fitness is 21-24%, and athlete is 14-20%. I am also about ready to go to the gym to run 3.5 miles.

Am I fat? Sure. Do I really want to go down the scale more quickly? Absolutely. Could I be happy if I spent the rest of my life at this fitness level and size? Maybe. I honestly can't say. But I am going to do my very best to feel really good about it as long as I possibly can. And today, I feel great about it.

Rhonda...welcome. I am Jenni, new to this forum, but not new to weight loss....I am a regainer and have committed to this time being my last!

Lotusmama...so glad to hear from you!!!! I am glad you stopped by and you know what??? That is great to continue to stop by and keep on trying!!!

Toasted....you are insanely busy but staying on plan???? That is amazing!!! Great job I hope the scale moves for you really soon!

Martini...I missed you!!!! And I am glad you found some comfort in some people...it is always nice to have supporters especially in the dark times in our lives! We are here to support you too!!!

Mandy...I feel like you today. I changed my cheat day to Saturday that was a BIG mistake because Sunday is a high carb day and I can't control it...so I guess my cheat day is back to Sundays that away I go right to a low carb day. It is so hard finding the right ways but guess what??? We are here every day trying and that is what is important!!!!

Diane...I hope you have a great on plan week. It is really hard to get back into it after a vacation.....I am headed to Disney and about 3 weeks and I am dreading that!

Uber 246??????? HOLY bananas I think the monkey fairies paid you a visit! That is so awesome!!!!! I am hoping you make your mini goal this week

Laurie....Guess what???? The way I think of it is 6 pounds times 3 months would be 18 pounds down but 6 pounds added 6 pounds a month would be 18 pounds up...and I would rather go the 6 pounds down a month than the 6 pounds up....so even at times of slowness your still headed down which is AWESOME!!! And yay for the 14 pants!!!! I got mine on but not buttoned a while ago so I am almost ready to try them on again...but I am scared they are my only jeans I have so getting ready to go to Disney is scarey...now the capris were stretchy so the 14 capris I fit but now for the jeans....I should just put on my big girl pants (literally LOL) and go try them on again!

For me??? Well again I kind of blew it so Cheat meal is officially changed to Sunday...then I have NO excuses. I don't find out about that interview until Thursday so I am assuming it will be next week...I need to go find a suit.....I am thinking a thrift shop for that....I want to look really professional. I am cutting down my weigh ins or trying we will see how that goes I am holding off til Wednesday....the up downs get to me a little!

Hi all!

Well, I did go up a little over a pound. Whatever. That's ok, I had a feeling that might happen. But, I started out today knowing that I'm back on track. No more ignoring myfitnesspal, I am recording it all. I went to Spin, and it was good. I'm a little worried about Body Pump tomorrow because I just don't want to be as sore as I was last week. We shall see what happens!!!! I think I made it difficult now to make my end of year goal. But, it gives me something to work toward and hopefully I'll get closer. I'm not going to go into a tailspin though if I don't make it.

I went shopping this weekend to get some dress pants. I just couldn't bear to wear the really loose ones anymore. I felt so frumpy!! So, I really like the new ones. I had to buy one 18, but the other two styles were 16. I'll take it.

Rhonda!!! Welcome back! I missed you and I'm so glad you are back! You are so smart to just get started on it all. I could see looking at the next two months and thinking you could put it off until January, but you are getting right back into it. Good for you! You'll see some losses right away, I'll bet!

Jenni: You'll be fine at Disney. Even if you gain a little, or don't lose, just enjoy yourself and be proud of your accomplishments! You've earned a nice vacation!

Laurie: Wow, nice sizes you are fitting in now!!! Good for you! I absolutely love your attitude too. That's great! I am inspired by you!

Uber: You too had a nice loss! Wow! I am impressed, and with new sizes fitting... awesome!

Mandy: That sounds like a great plan. Well thought out. I think you'll do great.

Toasted: Glad things are going better for you. It happens to all of us that life just takes us totally off course. UGH!!

Martini: Yep, I understand the "eat whatever I want" place. I've been fighting to get out of that. It seems like after my vacation, I must have thought it was ok to have whatever/whenever! Just have to fight to get it back. And yes! Keep posting here!! We need you! (oh, you can do it for yourself, but really, it is about what we need... and we need you!)

Lotus: Good hearing from you, too!

Hey everybody, evening check in.

Had a good day. Amazing how finally seeing the scale move really motivated me. I would like to hit 245 as a mini-mini and then move on down to 240 which would be half of my regain gone. The end of October marks 5 months of being back in the saddle (most of the time.)

Here is what makes me put all of this in perspective: in 2009, I weighed 295. I had gained every single year for 15 straight years and never succeeded in losing more than about 10 lbs that I quickly gained back. Since June 2009, I've weighed less than 295 every single day, weighed less than 285 for all but a couple of months, weighed less than 275 for most of that time, weighed under 265 the majority of the time, and rocked it down in onederland for the better part of two years. I realize that the other possible scenario was that I would have kept going up at the rate of about 10 pounds a year. Right now, I would weigh 355. I would most likely have developed severe health problems (several were brewing back when I weighed 295) and I'd be even worse off than when I started when my fitness level was genuinely awful. In short, struggling to lose, trying to maintain, and even yo-yoing is all better than the alternative!!!

Laurie: You are rocking small sizes, you are hanging out under 200, you are fit and getting fitter, you are a weight loss rock star, and I also found what Toasted said to be very helpful! Just remember, every day that you try to stay on plan is a day that you do not weigh a pound more than 197.

Diane Why is it that it is so hard to get back from vacation? When I was coming back from my very off-plan vacation in August, I remember that Laurie suggested that I remind myself that it was hard but that I was just going to white-knuckle it through. You got this!

Jenni Thrift store sounds like a good plan, and you are going to be so glad to be 30 lbs lighter when you go for that interview.

Good morning!

Uber - Seems as though you are truly back on your path! And I love, love, love you pointing out that paying attention and working toward the goal--even if you backslid some--has prevented the gain that might otherwise have happened. You never went back to your pre-first loss fitness level. What was the term Toasted use? Superhero rock star! It's hard. And you are doing it. And with each passing day and passing challenge, you're figuring out better and better ways of doing it.

Diane - Getting back on the horse can be so hard. But accepting that we're not going to be perfect is, in my mind, the difference between success and failure. And you know what? I used to work out with my husband from time to time, and he pointed out once that I wasn't going deep enough with my lunges. So, I adjusted how I was doing them, and could not climb stairs the next day. Since then, I have never once felt guilty about dialing it back when I could sense that the next day, I would be in serious pain. If you need to dial it back a bit in Body Pump until you're more in the groove, I think that could be a good idea. Exercise is supposed to make us feel good!

Jenni - I LOVE thrift stores, and have always found my nicest clothing there. Lots of women donate really nice suits. When I really need something nice, I tend to go to the thrift stores in the swankier communities. So excited for your interview! And you're absolutely right about direction being far more important than speed. I know that, but it really helps to be reminded of it from time to time.

Jessica - Haven't heard from you in a while. Been thinking about you. Hope life is getting a bit less crazy, that the Verizon job is going well, and that things are still developing with J.

195.8. Down 1.2 from yesterday. Nice to get some scale movement. The ups and downs make me crazy, but this down is a new low. I'll definitely take it. And I have sort of a funny story.

I didn't actually get to the gym for a run yesterday, but I did do my 4.25 walk/run when I got home. Shortly after, my husband and I went out for dinner. When I stood up after dinner, I could barely stand. (I'm the worst at post-work-out stretching.) So, I told him he just had to deal with the fact that I needed to stretch. He started stretching with me, cuz he can be cool like that. The dining room had been completely empty, and I was bending over to stretch my quads. Later, my husband told me that a male employee had walked into the dining room, seen me bent over, and had stood there staring until he saw my husband looking at him, at which point he sort of ran away. Now, my little feminist heart hates that I enjoyed this. But dang it, I kinda did. It's nice to no longer be thought of as asexual. And I like that my husband got a reminder that other men might be attracted to me. Not that I'm belittling the whole "don't want to be objectified" thing. I don't want to be objectified. And I know that attention from men can be uncomfortable and even scary. That encounter was not, though. It was kinda funny and a little ego-boosting.

Laurie - Just typing your name feels like I'm catching up with an old friend.

So two things... First, I actually lean towards your interpretation of shutting out the good as being a variation of cutting. I really do wish it were my self-control muscle loosening up, but I think it's one of the parts of me I like the least that comes out when times get tough. The only thing I can do is be happy that the older I get and the more I learn, the less I see that side of myself.

Second, I cheered for you with your story of getting checked out. Yes, I understand the issues of objectification and I definitely get the whole male attention being strange and scary, BUT I also get how important it is to feel seen and valued. I'm glad you had that.

Uber - I also realize how much I missed typing in your name.

What you tell yourself about exploring a tummy tuck when you get into the 180s even though you don't think you ever would go through with it - that's exactly what I needed to hear. There's something incredibly validating about being able to say, "I sure don't like this but I'll deal with it later because there are bigger fish to fry at the moment." Thank you so much for that.

The woosh is very good news. Scale love is a very good thing.

Toasted - I love how you're looking ahead to see what kind of hurdles you're going to be facing and then planning on how to deal with them in advance, but my goodness. I read the kind of days you have and think about tyrannies of little things. You've got some impressive juggling skills.

Mandy - I look at what you're doing a lot like how I see what Toasted was saying. You have your life and you want to live it in a way that's healthy and balanced so you try and strategize and figure out what works for you.

Diane - I'm so glad you're buying new clothes and not accepting that feeling of frumpiness!

Jenni - Ooohhh!!!! Suit shopping for the interview!!! I've missed so much in the past few weeks! Did you mention what kind of job it was that you're applying for or are we simply to assume that it's super awesome and something you're a perfect fit for?

I was on plan-ish today. Breakfast and lunch were completely on point. I went out for dinner and had a reasonable meal, but it did include noodles and a few greasy items. I definitely didn't go over 1,800 calories for the day so it's not a net calorie issue, but the noodles and grease triggered some unexpected cravings. Now I'm stuck at home living with these stupid cravings when I'd rather be focused on things other than food. Nothing for it but to go to bed.

I'll talk more about the position tomorrow. So yes the sore throat body aches headaches finally turned into something and I haven't been this sick in a LONG time....woke up to it coming out all ends....I know TMI...but I hope it goes away soon!!!!!

Okay. So.

The fasting thing yesterday? Big. Fat. Fail. (Hey, kinda like how I'm feeling about myself today! Go figure.) I made the mistake of trying to fast without putting away all of the Halloween stuff, so every time I walked by the basket of candy, or the container of cookies I made, I had my fingers in there. Every time I stuffed the sugar in my face I told myself THIS IS THE LAST ONE. And every time it was a lie.

At least until dinner. And I made a super yummy dinner. Probably too heavy, I didn't measure anything because yesterday was a lost cause at that point and I just wanted something yummy that wasn't full of sugar. I chunked up some turkey smoke sausage (cut it into quarter-round pieces), along with diced onions and peppers, and threw that on top of what was basically a smallish cheese quesadilla. Two tortillas with a thin layer of cheese between them (to make it more sturdy as a crust, you see) topped with the sausage, onion and peppers mixture, and then pepper-jack cheese sprinkled on top of that to hold it all together. IT WAS GOOD. Super sodium heavy with the tortillas, the sausage, and the cheese, but it was also filling, and I managed to stop eating everything in sight after that.

Today, I'm doing better. I'll try to make today a fast day, to make up for yesterday *not* being a fast day. I've planned eggs, yogurt, and whole wheat toast as dinner, since it's small and easy and I'm just cooking for me tonight.

Hubby has a date I am going to tease him relentlessly about it for days. He's up in Indy for a newbie church leader thing and afterwards he's getting dinner at some cajun place with a friend from back when he was a camp counselor in the area. This friend just happens to be a pretty, single, female. I keep thinking this is where I should be a jealous wife or something.

Maybe today I'm failing at the wife thing as spectacularly as I failed yesterday at the fast thing.

Oh well. Life goes on. I'll do better at wife-ing tomorrow.

I'm going to go e-shop for ellipticals now.