Advice please: boyfriend got another girl pregnant

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  • Time to walk away.

    You are too young for this kinda baby mama drama. Live the life you always wanted, don't settle!!!! TRUST ME.
  • Quote: 50% of pregnancies occur when the couple is using a form of contraception, usually the Pill or condoms. It's not actually "highly likely" that it was unprotected sex.
    I think it's *highly likely* you are wrong!
  • It is bad that he got someone pregnant, but I would be SERIOUSLY upset if he slept with someone else. pregnancy or not. You have to do what is right for you but I wuold be gone.
  • Quote:
    Does anyone have any advice? I don’t know if I should leave him so he can go be with his baby and try at a relationship with the mother, or stay because we’ve always been together? He says he wants to be with me and is scared about being a parent with a woman he barely knows. I just don’t know what to do. I don’t know how I’ll be able to deal with this woman being a part of his life now if I stay. I know I’ll love his baby because it’s a part of him, but I’m so scared and embarrassed and hurt.
    Who cares about his fears!!!
    You are your first priority. No one will treat you better than you treat yourself. Part of treating yourself well is not allowing others to treat you badly.

    What will you gain from remaining in this relationship?!
    You didn't create a baby with another man, so why should you play stepmom to a child conceived during your relationship with him?

    Do you really want to waste the best years of your life putting up with drama and heartache caused by someone who doesn't love you and has no clue of what love is?

    How much do you think you're worth?
    How would you like to be treated?
    Is he treating you in a way that you want to be treated?
    Do you believe that you'll find someone better?
    What are your standards/requirements for your significant other?
    Is your boyfriend meeting them?

    Only you know what to do. Trust in the abundance of the universe and know you're worth. A man who knows that you're smart, beautiful, and capable, and who treats you with kindness and respect will come along. Your boyfriend is not that guy.
  • Quote: I think it's *highly likely* you are wrong!
    If you read her next post, it's pretty clear that this was a typo. What I'm guessing she meant to say was that 5% of women on birth control become pregnant which is actually a conservative estimate, because most of the studies of birth control find that 5% of women using birth control correctly (as directed) will become pregnant. Not counted in the number, are the couples who did not follow the directions given by their doctor (on prescription meds) or on the birth control packaging (for otc products). For example women who missed pills occasionally, or couples who used outdated or improperly stored condoms were not counted in that 5%.

    Some methods of birth control do have much higher failure rates, but overall 5% is conservative. The failure rate is also much higher in some groups of people (for example education, income, and age are all factors that increase the likelihood of an unplanned pregnancy, with or withour birth control).
  • thank you, everyone, for your advice and comments. i havent been in a really chatty mood lately, but i have read each and every one of your comments... thank you so much.