I am hopeless!!

I make myself these promises that 'today is a new day'. That 'as of now I am back on track.'

In reality...I can't even make it 24hrs!!!

I am really starting to wonder if I actually can 'do this.' Because right now I see myself as nothing but a failure as far as dieting goes!

I keep losing control! I keep letting myself down!

Why am I finding it so hard? I managed for over six months! I've lost 30kgs! Why can't I finish the job??



Ok...hissy fit is over!



Tomorrow IS a new day!!

Tomorrow WILL be the new start!

I CAN do this!!!

I WILL do this!

I HAVE TO!!!


Mum will be calling me from Perth on Wednesday, I want to ask her to bring home some size 16 clothes (my 18's are starting to feel loose now). I'd like to be close to fitting into some 16's. I reckon that will give me that push that I need to get going again! But if I keep going the way I am then I am going to have 16's collecting dust while I struggle to squeeze into my 18's!

Thankyou ladies, for trying to keep me going in the right direction. Ultimately only I can do that...but it is a comfort knowing you are all behind me. We are all behind each other. And I know I haven't been much support lately, but I am there, right behind you all too.

I am going to head off to bed now. I had to do overtime at work this evening to help cover a shift, I am buggered and need a good nights sleep!

I'll be back tomorrow...with a positive post!!!

Now Lindor - I don't know about a failure, but maybe a drama queen (I'm teasing you)! According to your signature you've lost 4kg in the last 4 weeks - explain to me the *I can't do this, it's too hard*, and where it fits with such a fantastic achievement.

You're having a hideous, unsettling week - and you know, that 30kg down the track, you certainly can lose weight. Now calm down, and stop putting pressure on yourself to DO this, and DO that - good grief! I would love to fit into a Size 18 :-)

You're right Ani! I gotta look at the complete picture. Funny! It kinda motivates me too.

I was in a bad way last night...sorry to dump it all here!

And one more contributing factor that I haven't mentioned...one that has my brain totally frizzled...

...A guy I like has really been showing an 'interest' in me lately. I've not allowed that sort of thing for a very, very long time. I am totally confused as to what I want? It goes back to that 'I don't like being noticed' thing. It also reminds me that I don't want to be alone for ever!

Gah!! Too much!!!

My apologies...back to diet and weight-loss talk!

Have a good day everyone

Funny how you just happened to forget to mention this guy, Lindor :-). Are you interested in him, or just flattered … and is this doing your head in? I laughed when I read that, because it reminds me of me in a way - I can talk for hours about 'stuff', but when it comes to emotional vulnerability … it's worse than pulling hen's teeth.

How's today been? Are you feeling better?

Britt, how are you travelling? You'll get there, especially if you relax a little bit and allow it to happen.

leeny I want to know how you lost 60kg - how long it has taken you and how hard you found it. It's inspiring stuff! Your idea of writing down goals is great – I'm going to do it and see how I go.

Good to hear from you Gale, and glad to hear that you've dropped a couple of kilos.

:-)
Ani

I never forgot to mention him...I just didn't mention him

I'm not good at showing much emotion either...and my head gets in the way of my heart

It's too much!!! How do teenagers do it so often and make it look so easy???


Anyway!

Had a better day diet-wise today. Ate a little better, with a little more control? Actually, that might have been because I slept the afternoon away. Didn't get much sleep last night

Other than that...not much to report tonight.

Talk to you tomorrow I no doubt

I won't even attempt to give you any sane thoughts about the 'rules of attraction' - not with my track record. But it must feel nice, and I think you're having secret thoughts about this guy :-). You did sound a little more calm in your last post, so that's all good.

I'm having a fairly good week. My main goal this week is to walk for an hour every day and see how I feel with that. Well first of all I have to reach that goal, and see if it makes a difference to my energy levels and stamina.

:-)
Ani

Hi girls,

Thanks for thinking of my Ani!

Lindor, you little hottie you....DONT BEAT YOURSELF UP! Ani is right - you have lost 34kgs! If only I was near the 70's mark! You have done an AMAZING job so far...and 4 kgs in the last 4 weeks is right on track, so stop right now, jump back on the wagon before it disappears into the sunset and relax!

Ani, Im doing fine - been back on track since my last post. Have been walking 30mins everyday with Carter - did 45 mins today. Its hard cause he starts getting fussy about that time, so no real way to walk longer. Might have to start getting on the treadmill in the evenings after he goes to bed. Anyway, food-wise, doing great...havent weighed in a while, so not really sure where Im at, but I FEEL thinner (with 60kgs to lose, Im sure I cant notice a kg or two! haha)....I can guarantee that walking an hour everyday WILL make a difference...to your energy levels and your metabolism! Have fun!

Anyway, all good here. I did gain back my 3kgs when I weighed last week, so that was depressing, but also enough to kick my butt into gear again. I wont make my first goal of 10kgs lost by end of Sep, so will have to revisit that. Ani, I make small 10kg goals - 1st one is a massage, 2nd one a day at the spa, etc...

Looking forward to my "junk meal" - not sure what Im going to have. Dont want to derail everything, but want to eat something Ive been craving, so will have to think about it...

Have a good ngiht girls!

Britt
xxxx

Oh! I missed a couple of posts:

Gale, congrats! Its always such a great feeling knowing that youre doing something right...

Ani, despite my weight, I actually learned the right way to eat and stuff (I just dont do it!)...Im not usually one to get caught up in the fads - the only reason that I actually went with the shakes was for the convenience because of having an 8-month old, where cooking is really not that easy to do. The ingredients of the shakes are totally balanced and I will probably revisit them once I wean Carter once and for all (in about 4 months), if even for one meal, because I was really satisifed and it taught me to break my addictions to certain foods. We'll see when we get there. Ive always been an "all or nothing" person when it comes to losing weight...maybe thats why I am where I am?!? Anyway, like Leeny said, you DO have great and wise things to say, but I wanted to clarify why I was on the shakes...

Leeny, oh yum is all I have to say! And I am jealous that you have a walking buddy. As much as I love my son, hes not really a good distraction while we are walking unfortunately. I bring my ipod, but cant really get into the music since I have to listen out for cars (what is it about Australia that they cant put paths in residential areas?!? Im from CA, so I guess Im used to having a sidewalk wherever I go..). Ah well...better than going completely by myself I guess...

Ok, really, last post for the night.

Britt

So, I've just spoken to Mum (now in Perth)...asked her to get some size 16's for me

Her first question was 'how's the weight?' Huh!!!



Had a reasonable day diet-wise. Missed lunch, so was starving when I got home at 3pm. I had a big-ish feed then, but haven't felt a need to eat dinner, so haven't eaten since about 4pm!!!

Ani, yes, I think I have calmed down a bit since I spat the dummy the other day. Everything is getting on top of me...but I think I see a break coming soon. With Mum almost home now I think I can start to wind down a bit. As much as she infuriates me at times, I have to admit she can be a huge help! She can take her dog back and look after her own place. She can help me with my packing, she can help by taking my dogs when I have people come by to view the place. It is going to be a great weight off my shoulders!

Anyway, good luck with the walks! They are bound to help! I'd love to be able to walk some of the walks you have in Perth!

Britt, I know losing 30kgs is a great achievement, but it is really frustrating that the last 20kgs is soooo hard!! I am not beating myself up as much as it might appear...I am just really frustrated that I am struggling with it just now.

I'm not about to give up though!!

You, too, are sounding very determined! I can see you doing this! The start is always tricky. It is hard to find a routine that works for you, but once you do, you are halfway there!

Well, I need to hit the sack!

'Night all

Hey can a little old Kiwi join in and be an honourary Aussie?
I've been mucking around with my weight for 6 months and really need to get back on track and would love the support.
Oh dear I just looked at my signature from last time I was here and just worked out that I've put on 5 kilos since then...that sucks.
I lost 13 kgs with Jenny Craigs last year and I'm right back where I started from.
I really need to kick myself up the butt and get into gear again.

Hey Chaarli, welcome aboard :-). I've found the women in here to be really kind and supportive, and I've been here around four weeks or so. What are your plans for losing weight this time around?

Congratulations for coming back to do it all again - I don't consider that to be failure in anyone's eyes. I think it's a place we have all been … lost some weight and put it back on again (and then some). It's a real learning thing - to be able to find the key to what works individually to help us lose that weight and keep it off.

Lindor, why does your mum emphasise your weight so much? Does she nag you about it? It sounds like it annoys you - but don't let it get you down too much, because you're the one who will get all the benefits from this - nobody else.

Have a great day everyone. It's raining here again today - so I'm going to need some extra motivation to go for that one-hour walk today.

:-)
Ani

Lindor, just had to say....EVERY TIME I talk to my Mom on the phone, shes like, "hows the diet going?" Ugh. I feel your annoyance! Hahah....Cant wait for the day to say that Ive lost 30kgs though and back in a size 16! What a joyous day that will be! I kinda dont want to tell her my progress at all so that she can be a little surprised when she sees me in Jan, so I just keep saying, "Good. Its going fine." Hahah

Welcome Chaarli (is that how you spell your name? If so, thats very different and cool! )! Youll enjoy it here!

Well, ladies, braved the scales this morning and lost 2kgs in the last 4 days, so at least water weight is coming off. Carter is crawling now so Im on my toes ALL day long with him...his favorite thing is electric cords at the moment. Wonderful. Ok, best be going. Have a great day everyone!

Britt

Hey all

Well I have lost the plot well and truly this time. What is it about me that i can be fantastic for about a month and then all it takes is about a week and the weight i managed to lose is back I suppose i am good at maintaining that way but just a bit premature.

Lindor, I agree, the last kilos are the hardest to lose. I think because we feel sooo much better and of course looking better, we forget the big picture...why we started in the beginning. I just have to think that this is day 1 again and i only have 20kgs to lose and not 80kg as i once did..ugh...

I am definitely an emotional eater. My eldest son is going on a school camp for 2 weeks. Off the gladstone, mackay, cairns and the reef etc. He will have an amazing time and an experience of a lifetime but me....well i am worried sick about him going. He is my "special" boy and has difficulties with lots of things. I know they have lots of help going and the break for me is much needed also but i just am worried sick about him. I know that sounds silly but all you mums out there will know what i am on about.
So consequently, food is my comfort...AGAIN...Had to cook goodies yesterday for the camp. I made a caramel slice, choc chip muffins, nutty biscuits and a date loaf for their morning teas. Yum...yes i licked the bowls, spoons etc etc. Just downed 2 pieces of date loaf(i made an extra one to keep at home...why????)

Sorry to dump, but i know you ladies are just great listeners I will get back on track by evening meal as i feel bloated and yuk. My neighbour just came over and asked me to join her for a walk. I declined...don't even want to do that today. Poor ol me...i will be fine soon. He leaves tommorow morning so after some tears it is time to get back on track.

Hope everyone else is doing better than me.xxxleeny

Chaarli is a nickname, my real name is Luise,and yes it is spelt like that.
This time around I'm going to do WW but I still have some Jenny food so I'm going to do a combo of the two.
I love Jenny cause you don't have to think about what you are eating but it is not cheap and when I was doing it last year I was working and now I'm not so I'm going to do the best that I can.
I really just need to plan to stick to something. I keep flip floppping around.
I get really cross with myself because I walk heaps so the weight should just fall off me but I keep on eating so badly.
Now that it is getting warmer here it is getting easier to get out and walk and to drink my water, that is my big downfall.
I just need to make a plan and stick to it.
We have great WW frozen meals and desserts here so I think I will try to use those if I can.

Talking of ready made meals, and welcome to the gang Luise, for the brief stint of being single, I was purchasing ready made diet meals for a while, and lost 10kgs. Silly me then got a live in boy friend and the weight piled on again.

But for me it was the easiest way to lose weight. Not good if you have a family to feed, but great if you are single.