Hi guys. Yesterday went well calorie and exercise-wise. I'm not doing anything challenging or intense yet but at least I'm putting in the minutes. Work is work. I'm trying to wrap things up so that I don't have to take work with me when I go on vacation after Christmas. My office closes for 3 weeks at the end of every year and usually that still means work for me except with the dubious privilege of taking it on vacation with me and not having to come in but this year God willing should be different. For the first time since 2011, it actually seems possible that I might JUUUUST be able to relax and enjoy my vacation and just get to know myself and just vision and think about what I want to be doing and need to be doing over the next few years.

Diane: HAPPY BIRTHDAY IN AREARS!!!!! I hope you had THE BEST amazingly OFF-PLAN day surrounded by everything you love! I'm totally with you on being off-plan on a birthday! Heck if I'd know it was your birthday, I might have gone off-plan with you from here to celebrate as well. I love birthdays and truely believe reaching a new age is the most amazing gift because it's not guaranteed to anyone. Totally worthy of celebration in whatever way you like! Congratulations on making it through the past year and on your new age. I pray this year is filled with joy and peace and laughter and success and most importantly fulfillment of purpose for you!

LemonThyme: That darn comfort food that sucks us in- why does it have to be so good though!!! You had me at cheese and potatoes. I'm in awe of the fact that you can make your own swimsuits, cover ups and shorts!!!! That's amazing. I think shorts are challenging for all but the most childlike-ly boyish frames. I have the opposite problem to you in that I have no hips, but I have chunky thighs (a la #ThickThighsSaveLives) and I'm the apple-iest of apples, so shorts are always clinging and riding in the most unfortunate ways. I hope YOUR shorts pattern quest is successful and you're able to customize something for yourself that works.

Lillion: I'm thinking of you and your family today and sending prayers your FIL's way. I'm glad you're feeling less pneumonic (?) and that you're feeling more on track with everything. I've never had chocolate-covered pretzels before but I can imagine! That needs to be in my next amazon haul for sure!!!

Laurie: On the DH front, I hope things are better. Everyone is complex and carrying their own baggage and it's understandable, but it also sucks to have to always feel like you're on eggshells with someone you love. Maybe in a moment when things are going well and he's not in the midst of an insecurity crisis, you could let him know how his accusations make you feel. I know about insecurity crises and the associated fears that cause them and when I'm in the midst of one is not the best time to hit me with rational explanations. I need to dig myself out of the unworthiness and fear mindsets first, reason myself into equilibrium before receiving my truth bomb. #TLTMAS thank you for all the wonderful things you say about me... I don't always have an appreciative audience so it's lovely of you to say such things. What you said to Bookmark about feeling better just from doing the right things for your body no matter the weight, was so wise and so true. It's not always immediately the scale that gives affirmation but I know I feel better emotionally when I have a run of workout days or I accomplished my diet goals and I'm on track #BestAdviceEver


Okay guys, I have to get back to work. Yesterdays goals were all accomplished (oh the excitement!!! ) Wishing everyone a great weekend!

Goals for the Rest of Today
1.) Complete at least 30 minutes dedicated to exercise
2.) Hit 6000 steps
3.) Stay within 1500 calories

I hate when you have a non thinking moment and totally space - grabbed an avocado mindlessly for breakfast and couldn’t figure out why it was so darn hard to cut. Well imagine my surprise I picked the lightest green one to cut into - no sense wasting it. So I’ll be eating a crunchy unripened ‘Cado today. Believe me - those buggers have no taste at that stage. Truly a dumb moment for today!

Toasted: I have been sewing since I was about 7-8 but got more into apparel when I was in high school. I always wanted something different from the rest plus at a taller frame and to accommodate my butt (even then it was my unneccessary evil - the only good thing about the K-trash clan did for butts was make them acceptable these days). My mom taught me and I’m teaching my girl. So I’m going to order some twill and get on with it.

BTW make your own pretzels! They probably won’t ship because the chocolate in warm temps gets unstable. If you have a double boiler pan or a large bowl you can meet over a sauce pan you can make your own. Take chocolate or chocolate candy bark - melt in the top pan/bowl over boiling water. Once melted, work quick and dip pretzels. Lay on parchment paper to cool and harden. That’s it. If you like sprinkles or extra stuff on them you can drop those on them prior to set. Store in a tightly closed container.

Caveat: Sorry - can add to daily calories quickly!

Ili: good luck today. Will he be put under? Remember anesthetic takes forever to wear off in older people - as in they like to nap for some time thereafter.

Am: did not fast this am. Tomorrow is another day and I’ll do it then. I was up at 4 - too much to do. I have to pay the rest of the hotel today (ugh) and buy my fabric. Dawned on me I need to make a Christmas outfit for dd’s concert. She needs an age appropriate dress as she’s young and fits in juniors - she’s about my height right now and I’m not short and she’s not double digit in age yet. So I need to get crackalackin.

Man this avocado is horrible. Don’t do what I do! Happy day all.

Thanks everyone for the birthday wishes!

Lilion: Thinking about you and your family today and praying that all goes well!

Lemonthyme: Yep, nowhere near ready for Christmas here either. I am hoping to get a lot of stuff done this weekend, so I'm not thinking about it all the time. So much to do. Hope you get a lot of things done today!!

Toasted: Yeah, sometimes I forget to be thankful for my birthday. I don't mind getting older, but I'm not a huge fan of all of the attention on that day from those outside of my family. I know it probably sounds weird. but it makes me a little uncomfortable. Hope you also get stuff done so that you don't have to take it with you! Everyone deserves some rest and time off!!!

For me, not much to report. I had kind of a rough morning, so I didn't get to the gym. We're having to put one of our cats down today and while she had a long, happy life (21 years old), I felt sad. It is definitely time so that she doesn't have to suffer with pain, but still sad. It's ok, I am usually fine with this once it is done, but leading up to it is always tough.

Have a good weekend everyone!

The cookies won today! Ugh.

Well tomorrow I’ll deal with the fast and get on with it. Plus the cookies leave the house. A HUGE HELP.

I have yet to figure out dinner. Maybe grilled cheese for everyone. I don’t have cheese slices rather shredded by in the end it all works. It melts and life is good. I’ll split mine w my youngest then I get a taste and not the total calories.

All my baking is done for the week. There is one other recipe I’d love to try and that can wait even after the holidays. It’s an everyday type cookie so nothing fancy or seasonal. It just sounded good.

But we know what cookies do to me those evil little buggers.

Laurie: I hope things are better for you today and you and The hubs had a talk and have gotten that nonsense out of the daily conversation. If not, I do hope your weekend goes as well as can be and you stick to your food plan. How did your exercise and goals go for the day?

Toasted: where will your end of year time off travels take you? Ugh - work on vacation is always horrible! May it stay away from you.

Diane: sorry to hear about your old friend. I am not a huge pet person, but I know like anything else we get attached to their personalities and quirks and miss them when they are gone. Hang in there.

Lil: how’d he do? Best wishes for speedy recovery!

Bookmark: how is your plan working?

Happy evening all. Tomorrow will be spent cleaning - the freezer and basement. If only we can make a dent in it all. That’s my hope! Off to make the grilled cheese and get on with the evening. And put the cookies down and away and the diet goes on. Here it goes.

My best to you all!

Thanks for the welcome backs, everyone. I did not have a great week, food wise..though I did at least walk to work a couple of days. Tonight I was in full on binge mode. I'm not brave enough to go near the scale at the moment. I'm just feeling very tired (obviously weight and unhealthy habit related) and quite depressed. I'm just not in the mood for Christmas, for lots of reasons, and that kind of bums me out more. I'm hoping that I can get some quality rest in this weekend, anda bit of exercise, and some healthy meals...and no junk food! So I'm in better shape to face Monday. I feel like I barely made it through this week at work.

Hurdle one is going to be spending the day with my Mother tomorrow...she wants to take me out for lunch, and then do pizza with my niece and nephew for dinner. So I'd just like to publicly commit to ordering a salad or otherwise light dish at lunch, and trying to get home for my own dinner..

Book: I’m sorry you had a struggled filled week. I’ve been there too often too. What can I offer? Just make a small change each day, whether it’s adding more water, or a bit of exercise. As for today with your mum - how about you do a big salad and one slice of pizza? Drink water before you go to fill up a bit and then eat. I’m not one to turn down a good gooey pizza and I’m learning how to limit my number of slices, but there are ways that you can have a small slice and still be good.

Also, your scale may give you a good surprise. I’ve had those days where I just KNOW it will be high and it’s actually lower than I thought. Get a weigh in and a place to start from. I find it helps to weigh daily and to post my number here daily. Work slowly and don’t beat yourself up. I’m the great abacus as I loose a bit and then slide back up and then back down and my frustration follows. It is what it is and I’m learning to deal with it a bit better. I have been having some luck with intermittent fasting. And it helps that I’m not traveling and being responsible for what and when I eat. Maybe it’s something you can look at? I think toasted is doing IF this week for some days but not all. Maybe it would be a fit for you?

Hang in there - Christmas comes with all sorts of emotions. For me i generally make it stressful of late. I give myself all sorts of projects and then Go nuts hurrying. Maybe if I didn’t do that, I wouldn’t feel over burdened and over extended. But I seem to do it every year. And every time I grumble but I always enjoy what I do in the end and the smiles it brings.

Hello all!

AM: 226.0

I could eat all the cookies sitting here. Instead I just grabbed my coffee and turned out the light in the kitchen. I won’t see them, I can ignore them, and I can take them up to church later and get them out of my periphery and reach. Coffee is good AND I WILL MAKE MY FAST GO TO NORMAL TIME BEFORE I EAT. Ok know that I shouted that I best do it.

I told DH we’re in the basement today. I need some order somewhere and I need to get down there and clean and put away and stick things of like items in like areas of storage. Put things back in totes, and well, make it look a heck of a
Lot better than it currently is. It’s a dump! And we need to clean out the freezer too. So a few jobs to tackle. I just can’t poison my eye this time. Wash the hands often and don’t touch the face especially the eyes. Good gravy I know how to hurt myself.

Ok - look up buttercups - we can all do this!

I do hope you each have a good weekend. Enjoy the readying for Christmas, the time spent with family and of course your scale. May it be good at good numbers for each of you! Hang in there WE CAN DO THIS! I may post later - maybe I’ll find something super great in my day that I need to exclaim about - even if that’s that I was able to fast until 11am. Hey - to get there on a Saturday with DH home and attempting to feed me up until then - we’ll that will be a big accomplishment.

Ok I’m off to deal with the mess from hades.

I got to 1030 fasting so that was good. The cookies were dropped off so that is good - less temptation in the house. And we are working on the basement so all the stars have aligned thus far this morning. Slowly slowly getting the day going. Did I ever say kids have an awful lot of stuff and they don’t know how to pick up things well if at all? Yep - that’s my kids. They are still young enough and that’s expected at this age. They’ll learn right?

Happy day all - the day is motoring and perhaps just perhaps I’ll get something done.

No w/i today

I woke at 2 got out of bed by 430, drinking coffee and nursing a darn sore throat and stuffy nose. I loathe colds and everything associated.

Have the news on and they are saying each person will spend $960 on Christmas gifts. I think I heard that right. That’s not me or my spending (but it’d be fun to have that type of budget any day) Hah! I have to run to town today and find some fabric for the concert top - we’re compromising - she doesn’t want a dress and wants to wear her leggings so I’m making a swingy tunic for her. It’s cute and should work well for her age. As I said yesterday I have such a time trying to make her clothes fit her age and not her presumed age due to her height. Her classmates/families all know she’s who she is - but still I like her to fit in amongst them. I’ll have to whip that into production and get it done lickitysplit. I am also going to grab some extra fabrics to make some things for the trip as well. I’m hopeful I can do all of his in a timely manner.

So besides feeling crappy and avoiding the sweets, today will be busy. I need to hop on board here at some point. I finally found my camelbak water bottle. I’ll need to get back on that today too. I’m behind in it all.

I do hope you all are doing well. I know weekends it’s quiet here so I babble away - trying to keep honest with my crazy diet plans and life. One day it will slow some. Today is not it.

Oh and it snowed. It’s been doing small and slight amounts and it “just is” it’s not elliciting a response from me other than - cold, I need to bundle up and how long will it last. I know - I’m sure there will be one of these future snowfalls that makes me smile with a moving white sky, thick with fat white fluffy flakes that land just so on the trees and branches and makes it picture perfect, however right now it’s just been the annoyance kind of snow - nothing pretty or great here.

Ok, I sound grumbly. I’ll sign off now. My mini goals to get me into Monday: water. That’s it today, my goal is to get my water intake back up there. I’ve been on hiatus and not doing well on that front.

Happy day all. I’m off to see what the day brings.

I’M NOT CHANGING MY TICKERS.

I’m being obstinate.

I ate.

Lots of cookies and had a soda and not very good bread products this weekend.

And I gained weight

228.0

HOWEVER, this abacus knows that it can come on off again. I’m still in the 220s and I’m currently fasting this morning. I beleive those pesky 3 lbs of cookies and other carbs will Take a quick trip. That’s my goal. But da** I make a good cookie!

So I hope you all did well with your weekends. I did not. And if you didn’t please feel free to join me on the battle this week. My mini goal for the end of the week would be 223-224. I know it sounds like a lot but if I can battle back I’m that much closer to a new decade for a new year. That’s my end of December goal.

Weekend went well. The cookies made money, the kids meeting was fun and I’m sorting legos. Lots of legos. My kids are of the age and I have picked up buys at goodwill - I have found that a few of my purchases actually contain about 8 full loose sets in them. I’m missing some pieces like windows, but this may be separate purchases. I have a few repurposed gifts under the tree - they’ll be cleaned and packaged back up and it will give my kids oodles of things to build and things for me to step on or vacuum up (as that’s what ALWAYS HAPPENS, if you never stepped on legos you all should try it - if your into harming yourself with sharp angled hard plastic on what then becomes touchy parts of your feet).

Alright people. I do hope all is going well. I’ll take my abacus body and work on it again today. I have a physical late this month and I’m hopeful to be less because last year when I saw her I was back up to 250 or so. And she’s a stickler for noticing changes in gain/loss. So I’m hopeful to not see the dreaded 112kg that I always see when I step on their scale. I even made DH hop on the scale this weekend because I had a thought that maybe the scale was hinky because I measured my hips and they are static from October’s measurements. Alas - the scale is just fine and I have yet to find where the weight that I lost came from. Not my bum thats for sure!

Happy day all. I’m off to slay fat cells!

Bookmark: I understand where you are, I think we all get there or have been there in the past. I'm sorry it is such a struggle. I do wish that it was easy! Just sending my good thoughts your way, and hope that you get to feeling happier!

Lemonthyme: Glad the cookies are gone for you, and that you're getting things done. It does get to be an overwhelmingly stressful time of year. I got a lot done over the weekend, but not everything yet. I hope that next weekend is my weekend to get completely done, except for wrapping. I normally do that on Christmas Eve. Your Lego story made me think of this place in my city that sells used Legos. They recently went to an auction or something and bought over 8 million pieces. They brought them back in two 26 ft Penske trucks. Ha! I guess sorting them is quite the process. Yep, I can imagine. They said that they are the largest replacement piece store in the country.

For me, I'm starting to feel a little bit of the "I don't care, it is the holidays" attitude. I'm planning to fight it and keep it at bay, but I have a feeling I'm not making my goal for the end of the year.... and that's ok. Just need to keep working out and feeling good, and then keep food under control.

Quick drive-through. Long day. Feeling tired and strung out. Ate too much yesterday. Ate almost nothing today, at least so far. Gonna try to eat reasonably this evening and get some decent sleep and get it all sorted out for tomorrow.

Hope everyone has a great day!

Thanks again everyone. Sorry my responses aren't terribly detailed. My computer is painfully slow these days and scrolling takes ages so I get to the post part and am just like RAH, GO!

Weekend was not good. lol...Went for the burger and fries with Mum, and then binged that evening and munched on everything left in the house all day yesterday. Today has been successfully low calorie, though I'm still feeling bleh and didn't walk to work because I couldn't get my *** out of bed this morning. Still, it's a step in the right direction. Hopefully tomorrow will be another one.

228

Evidently I did not do well yesterday. Oh well. I attempted to try and did not succeed.

DH and I are arguing over something that really is stupid and had he let me finish my side of the conversation then we wouldn’t be at this grumbling spot. But that didn’t happen and there is no sense bringing it upAgain today as he’ll just pout all day. So I’ll just try to not eat my way to an answer and get on with the day.

My day will be filled with general nonsense and I’ll go through the motions and hope to find some light in my day. Maybe I can get the scale to move again. Who knows. The whole fasting thing this morning I don’t feel like doing at all. I’d love to put my face in a box of my cookies.

Why today am I letting anyone dictate my mood when theirs is lousy?

Anywhichway - have a good day all. I have to work on this poundage. Ugh. May you all have lots of luck with your scale movement. I’ll be here to cheer you on.

Good morning!

I have a day filled with meetings and personal errands (I have two 14yos in my house, and the second one needs to get her permit today), so this is going to be super quick again. Need less busy-ness in my life, so going to try to make better decisions about that. I am still going to try to get 20K steps today, though.

Laurie: 14?! Holy cow! Why do I think your in TX? My niece got her permit over the summer. However she’s forever attached to her phone and her driving skills freak me out due to her attention span. I wish you the strength of mountains to train two future drivers. Good gracious!

AM: I’m sewing, it should come together quickly but I’m doing so as not to make too many mistakes to make it look too homemade. Sometimes it’s a worry. Today is one worry as my dd can get a bit vocal when something is not to what she anticipated or her liking. Then it’s on to Christmas gift sewing. You know - I knew what I wanted to do early in summer and COULD have gotten it done then however I’m now cramming all this in at the last minute. Alas, one day I’ll lead but that will probably finally come at age 100.

Eating going poorly. Maybe I’ll pull out of this funk soon. It stinks! Alas I’d sure like the scale to move but until I get better about it today it probably won’t happen.

Ok happy day all. I’m off to go get this top done. Wish me well.