My goodness lots of posts since yesterday, no way I can respond to them all but I want to say I read them and feel for you gals that are getting close to Menopause. You know girls don't expect it to be bad, it doesn't have to be. I remember my face getting so hot and my night school students used to say Mrs. B. have you been to Florida lately. I would just laugh and go outside for a min. and cool off. Other then that I sailed through it. In fact I felt much better, no more monthly blues etc. Dh also says I am much easier to live with now so it is something to look forward to.

Maybe this story will give you a laugh girls (sorry Sandra you have heard it)
I took my grandson shopping at Christmas. It was very busy, lots of people.
I told him to hold my hand (he was 10) I went into Gap and was looking at clothes for my granddaughter. I let go of his hand for just a min. and told him to stay with me. Well, I went to leave, grabbed his hand and started to walk. All of a sudden I thought to myself, my grandson's hand is not that big. I had grabbed a teen age boy by the hand and was dragging him along. lol The look on the teens face was priceless. I darn near flipped but I had to laugh. The poor boy must have thought I was some nut. lol There was my grandson laughing, he was almost doubled up.

Sandra, the picture that came through my computer was very small and I could not see any faces.

Angela, it is a shock to find out people that you thought were so nice are not. I remember thinking that everyone that went to Church had to be real nice, well I found out differently.

Talking about the Church, it has become very important in my life the last four years. For years, I did not go, and one day I woke up out of a sleep and I heard a voice saying go back to the Church. I did and have been so happy since. It has filled a void in my life. I found it real hard when my children left the nest. I am taking so many Studies in the Church. Right now I am studying "Revelation" and also "The Da Vinci Code", and how some people are believing it, rather then a story. I want to go see the Movie.

I will come back later and read take care all.
Blue skies,
Rose

Rose, I'm really not expecting it to be horrible but the blues and the mood swings that I can't control are pretty darned hard to take. I'm getting the hot flashes already and they are bearable. I'm just hoping it doesn't get any worse than this. Your story about you shopping expedition is hilarious! That would have won you money on Funniest Home Videos! Jim and I are planning to see the Da Vinci Code too, depending on the reviews it gets.

I'm off to the treadmill!

Hey, girlies. I'm back from my meeting. I was able to eat enough this morning to get my weight up -- weighed in at 147.2. Then they set my 10% for 14 pounds, which would be 133.2, so I've reset trackers, etc. I know I don't have to hit the 10% but over the next 12 weeks at least it'll give me something to work towards. Since the meetings are at 12:30 I'll have two meals and half my water in, which adds quite a bit to my "empty and nekkid" morning weights. This morning it was 142.8.

Okay enough of that. I'll be leaving here around 3:30 or so to go shopping. Judd has bowling tonight so he won't be home until 9:00. I'll be able to get back on here and update. Meanwhile though, thanks for all the well wishes on my return to work. I'm making it okay but have decided (again) that I can't take pain pills at night. I'm just too sleepy in the morning. I thought last week I had gotten to where I wasn't going to have to take them, but the last few nights I've needed them. Too bad though; I'll take Advil or something and hope they work well enough to get me to sleep.

Be back later!

Welcome back into the world of the official WW weigh ins!

I'm in the middle of scheduling Jim's shoulder surgery. It could be happening as early as May 24th. I'm freaked.

kathy, we won't be coming this summer, but will you show me this winter? taylor's my man, too. as soon as i figured out his # i started voting last night. (before he sang #1 song)

just had grilled ocean perch for lunch. yummy! we're getting excited about going to a shoot near townsend, mt this weekend. should be fun. at that tournament they will group me with all women. i don't get to shoot with women often.

frouf and vickie, i hope your mood's lifting. you know what? one of your purposes is to be our friend. (and that's just 1 of the numerous purposes you have for us alone)

vickie, that's great news about sarah. i am so happy to hear that she's doing well. you and jim definitely deserve your outing tomorrow. you two have a blast! i don't know if i should give you eating advice but here goes: eat what you want. this is a very special occasion. i would like to know how to post larger photos, too.

i'm using print house magic to reduce my photos. it lets me reduce them in inches. i found that w=3.85" and l=2.89" worked for me. now i'd like to know how to post them so folks could click on them to enlarge them. any ideas, anybody?

i am the one in the back with the black dress on. (first time i've had a dress on in months. can you believe it?) thanks for the comment about my hair. i have decided to let it keep growing for awhile. i have an appt fri to get it shaped and my bangs trimmed.

patti, what a great nsv (are those the initials?) on being back better into your clothes. i am very, very happy for you.

angela, i'm almost 60 and am naive about folks, too. it's a plus that we tend to look for the good. it's just a shame that sometimes it ain't there.

rose, i didn't remember that story. at my age i think you could tell me the same story a dozen times and it would always be new to me. lol

kathy, i was pleasantly surprised to see that you're going to meetings. girl, you are on the right track for sure.

vickie, a few years ago curtis had both shoulders replaced in a 3 month time period. if you need to talk, i'm here anytime.

Thanks, Sandra. I hate to be a baby and make this all about me but.....I just don't know how I'm going to do everything around here. I guess I'll just have to take a deep breath and lower my standards. Jim does SO much around here including taking most of the care of both animals. I'm the brains.....

Plus, I'll have to be driving him to all the PT appointments. Ok, I'm done whining for now. I MUST go plan since the 24th is a week from today.

Gosh, I do well a couple of days and then I go off program, I get so mad at myself. I marvel at people like Kathy, you sure have done well. I just made some corn bread for supper and guess what, I just had to try some. ugh

Vicki, you will get though it all, I know how you must feel though as my husband does most of the work around here. I do house work (well he vacuums ) but since he has retired he does a lot of the work that has to be done.
Oh I hear thunder must get off, will be on later.
blue Skies,
Rose

I'm finally home from work. Rose, could you send some of that thunder this way? We have temps in the 90s forecast for all week. Starting tomorrow afternoon, I'll be back in the yard trying to get more sun on this pasty skin.

All you who get help from your DHs, count your blessings. I'm fortunate that mine flushes the toilet after himself. LOL! I do it all in addition to working as many hours as he does. But whatever ... life goes on.

I went to Kohl's and got him two shirts and a pair of shorts, and got Shaun a shirt. I didn't want to get Shaun much without him making sure this one fits. If it does, I'll get a few more if he wants them.

I'm so ready for AI tonight. This is getting my BP up, that's for sure! I didn't get to vote because I fell asleep right after we watched it.

Judd's having LOs when he gets home from bowling. I'm not sure if the bowlers will be taking him out afterward or not, so I didn't want to make a big dinner and have it go to waste. Nobody else is here.

vickie, i have to admit i did some whining, too, when curtis had his surgery. he had it while we were down south as there weren't any shoulder specialists here then. we were living in a motorhome. there was a huge ice storm while he was in the hospital (20 miles from the rv park) so i just stayed at the hospital with him till he was able to ride home.

nobody came to sit with me in the waiting room. he went into surgery early am and i got to see him around 7 pm. i was in the waiting room all that time. nobody drove in cuz of the ice.

i was overwhelmed to the point that i passed out at the hospital and they rushed me to emergency. cost $1500 as our insurance wouldn't pay cuz i was all right. at least i'm thinking that was the reason. they thought i was having a heart attack but it was just an anxiety attack. i don't know why but i totally lost it when the pt was showing me how to help move his arm. i'm just telling you this so you'll know i wasn't as brave as i try to be. i lost it to the point that i "hit the floor".

then i was the driver. folks working at the rv park were helpful helping me refill propane, etc. it was an experience. three months later he had the other shoulder done--same place--same motorhome.

rose, i have cornbread sometimes. just count those points. i don't mean to sound like a "know it all" but i'd like to tell you what our ww leader said the other day. "if you spill a little milk, you don't pour out the rest of the gallon." interesting, eh?

kathy, i'm pumped, too. i feel confident taylor is all right, but with ai you never know, do you?

Sandra, thanks for the tip, it sure makes sense. I find if I go wrong I think oh well and take more. I can hardly wait until tonight but I hate to see Elliott go and I am sure he will. I know you and Kathy like Taylor, the dancing he does gets me.
I just came back from Costco, got some goodies for the kids tomorrow night when we have them. We only get our son's kids once or maybe twice if we are lucky, a month. Our daughters kids we see every week.
thanks again for the tip and pass any on to me please that you find helps.
Blue Skies,
Rose

rose, we'll be having our grands fri night. the jury is still out on whether we're camping sat night. depends on rain. enjoy your grands. enjoy ai. i like elliott, too. he's a really nice guy and man! can he sing!! but you're right. taylor's my fav. i know he's not an "elvis" but there are a lot of things about him that remind me of elvis.

1. can't be still when singing
2. different hair
3. says "appreciate it" as elvis said "thank you very much."
4. sings well with fast and slow songs

prob others. can ya'll think of any? (or am i totally crazy?) (don't answer that last question)

Vickie - have a blast tomorrow and I hope you and Jim win BIG BUCKS! And we all know as you must too (deep down in your heart) that you are a supremely smart, organized and efficient person and you have shown what a fabulous caregiver you are - so no doubt Jim will do well thru the surgery with you by his side! Hang in there.

Poor Sandra - I can only imagine the intensity of your anxiety attack - glad there was really nothing wrong with you (altho it sounds mighty expensive).

Kathy - hope the advil helps out with the pain! And I am surprised they let a skinny minny like you join up w/WW!

Angela - I too tend to wear rose colored glasses (as dh always tells me) and find it hard to believe that people are not out there just trying to be nice - that there are hidden agendas and those that talk behind your back. Frankly I have not time for all of that - yes I am probably somewhat naive and may get hurt - but I prefer that to being suspicious about everyone and thinking the worst of them! We learn our limitatons I guess!

Well the therapist appt w/dd was interesting - seems dd wanted to work on our relationship! (guess all the recent screeching has affected her?). Told the therapist I was tired of her constant whining and asking for things! And I actually brought in pics of dd's washroom and what it looks like (floor covered w/wet towels, discarded clothing, stuff that missed the wastebasket and no visible sign of the counter cuz it is covered w/hair products, makeup, hair dryer, hair straightener). Seems dd think it's absolutely normal to be a messy teenager - while my take on it is "she just doesn't care at all" - we are obviously not interpreting each other correctly - no kidding jack!

She explained to dd about compromising and that if she wants the nagging to stop perhaps she can at least keep the floor clean? Dd is not big on compromise it seems....we also need to bond more, in positive ways - she suggested we have a 10-15 chat when I get home frome work - when i asked dd if she could leave the computer for this she of course said no! Therapist was trying to talk some sense into her. Anyhow, as we were leaving I went to use the washroom - and come out to see dd crying and therapist talking to her. It seems dd was upset cuz it seemed to her that therapist was 'taking sides' and not being fair - of course she insisted she wasn't - and apologized to her several times. Dd was quite upset when we left - muttering she was never going back again (yes we have an appt next thurs). Hopefully I can get her to change her mind by next week!

As for the 'hormone' theory - I sure wish that was the answer but I am not entirely convinced. I just feel I have nothing to live for (except of course my purpose here as a coreboard chickie!)....I just want to sit , eat and do nothing. Almost like a relapse? if you saw me a few years ago - I was working full time, doing an mba part time - studying, attending group meetings, writing and editing papers, while raising a family which included a little one! People were amazed at my perserverance and stamina (and believe me so was I!).

So do I need several years to recuperate? and do nothing? I still don't watch much tv and prefer reading and web surfing.

One of my main beefs right now I guess is financially related. As you must know I do like to travel, I like the finer things in life and I enjoy good restaurants, going out to shows and the theatre. Now that dh has been unemployed for over 1.5 years (okay a couple of minor contracts in there somewhere), I find it hard to justify any major spending - and I am eating into the inheritance money left to me by my aunt to keep us afloat.

My question to dh is 'what have you sacrificed since being unemployed?". I believe his answer would be 'nothing really'. His life has not changed in major ways - in fact it's probably gotten better as he can relax every day - work on his amp design - have lunch out once in a while w/friends (they usually pay). He is not a clothes horse or anything like that (and I'm usually the one to 'dress' him), not an avid traveller - likes to eat out - but can pass on it - does not really enjoy the theatre.

I on the other hand feel like I have sacrificed a lot? I no longer go shopping or buy myself anything much (in fact two latest clothes purchases were on e-bay). I feel guilty when I get my hair and nails done - I have not resubscribed to the broadway musical program (around $550 for 3 shows) and can't travel as much as I would like to! We are coming up to a long weekend here in Canada and under normal circumstances (i.e. dh working) I would not think twice about booking a weekend at a nearby resort - lovely place - very rustic, walking trails, spa, indoor/outdoor pools, horseback riding and gourmet dining! Of course I don't feel I can do that now - as I can't see spending the approx $700 the weekend would probably cost! Am I just spoiled and bitter? I'm trying not to say anything but it's really hard!

The only thing we do treat ourselves to are movies - we love seeing first run movies in the theatre - esp since it is a great escape for us (both physically and mentally). And even that is probably extravagant!

Eventually the $$ will run out - dh will have to get a job - I find it very embarrassing - esp when we are with his family. His mother acts so concerned saying she is sure something will turn up for him - I don't have the heart to tell her that he is not actively looking for work....and has already said he wouldn't demean himself by doing something for which he is overqualified!!!

I guess I just want my old life back - I wish I could plan a summer vacation and not have to just dream about it (really really wanted to go to Niagara falls this year w/little ds!). Yes I do have the 'inheritance' money and I know dh will say just go if you want to and use that money - but we will eventually need all of that $$ so how can I justify spending it now?

Okay - enuf of my whining right? I am thankful that right now I have a job, a roof over my head, 3 healthy children and my good internet buddies! right

Frouf, maybe you are just plain old tired of keeping everyone afloat. I believe most of us would feel exactly the same way you are feeling if we were in the same position. Solving the problem though is the problem, of course. If it were me, I'd be giving some ultimatums to DH to go get a job and help support the family. It would be different if you all could afford for him to stay home and still have the lifestyle you want. The problem is, if he leaves, would you then be able to travel and have the theater or would you just be without your DH? I'm sure you've thought all this through a million times. I think you should not feel guilty. I'm so sorry that you're in that situation and that I don't have any great advice. You are such a great woman and I really value your friendship here. It's just not right for you to be treated this way and be so underappreciated. Try to get some sleep tonight. I know this is the kind of stuff that keeps you awake.

Kathy, I've always said that I don't know how you do it all alone. I definitely do not have the constitution for it. I know I'll manage but it'll be tough.

Sandra, I sure hope the PT doesn't ask me to move his arm or I'll be passing out too! He'll have a PT appointment the day after surgery. I guess they want to make sure it doesn't "freeze".

Thanks Rose! Try not to worry about the cornbread. I have a GREAT Core recipe that tastes pretty darn good. I think it's on our board. Let me know if you can't find it.

Well girls, I won't be on tomorrow until very, very late. We'll be leaving for the breakfast and then the boat at 7:00. I think I'm getting up at 5:45 to shower and get ready. Something I am no longer used to!

Have a great day!

Oh Froufie I wish I had something profound to say to you. I am actually at a loss for words. You sound so sad and down in the dumps. Have you sat down with your family and told them how sad you feel?
I hate to see you spend your inheritance money, you should be investing the money for your retirement.
Bless you I will pray for you.

Vicki, have fun tomorrow. Thanks I will look up the recipe

Rose

Vickie, have a super time tomorrow and win lots and lots of money!! We'll be waiting for your report.

I made some pimento and cheese tonight using FF cheese, pimento and FF Miracle Whip. I tasted it and it was yuck. I'm still going to try and make a sandwich with it tomorrow (2 pts for the bread) and if it's gross, I'll give up and spend the other 2 pts for real pimento cheese. I've been craving it lately. If I have to, I'll get different bread where I can have 2 slices for 1 pt. Sandwiches are just so much easier for work. Of course if I switch to Flex I could have my margherita pizza at lunch, which I dearly love and could eat 45 times a day.

I hope Melissa's conference is going well. I sure miss her when she's gone; isn't is crazy-insane how close we all are? Whodathunkit?

We're supposed to go to lunch with the big boss tomorrow for Judd's birthday, and they want to go to Pappadeaux. That could actually be deadly for me, but if I can stick to my resolve and have grilled fish and vegetables, or a big salad, it can be done. That's a pretty big IF though.

I have a therapy appointment at 7:00 in the morning to make sure things are progressing (which they aren't) and to see if I should maybe switch to getting my PT there (which I should). We'll see what they say but I know what I'd like to recommend. As much as I don't want to have it done there, I need it. I hate to think about spending the summer with a limp but if something doesn't improve, that's what will happen. I'm going to ask if I can start using a cane instead of the crutches though. The crutches are getting in my way.

I hated to see Elliott go tonight, but I know Clive will take care of him. I'll bet he gets a contract with no problem. And now we just have one more week. I can already picture Taylor winning -- now he'd better do it!

Frouf, I thought I was going to have to do some swift talking with the WW lady but she let me in. I will talk to her next week to set my goal but no way should I let it go under 135. At my height (5'7") I think that's low enough. I hope you and Emily can work it all out. I know how tense it must be around there and that's not good for any of you. As for DH and the job, I just hate that whole situation. IMO he is just being so immature and irresponsible. Sure, we'd all like to relax and "do our own thing" and work on this or that dream, but that's not real life. He needs to step it up and I don't think he's going to. Why should he? He's got it made! And that's my two cents' worth -- which is exactly WHAT it's worth! I sure do feel for you and hope you can have a good dinner out with your friend. It sounds like she's a gem.

Good night, all. I'll see you in the morning.