Ugh, I'm so tired and it's only 7:30pm. I've always been a bit of an insomniac, but it's been better lately. So last night I slept from about 1am until 5am, and I don't think I managed to get back to sleep until it was time to get up. Since I had things to do I just got up and did them, but I feel like I'm dragging myself around. The stupid thing is that I'll probably watch television and by the time 11pm rolls around I won't be tired.

I also caught myself about to slip into an old habit tonight when making dinner. I had decided on some baked pasta (2.5oz) with meat sauce, with an ounce of cheese blend. Basically I cook whatever pasta is around (whole wheat spaghetti) and put it into a covered dish with a layer of cheese and then spread the meat sauce over it. Even with the cheese it's better than my old days with 5oz of pasta, more sauce, and parmesan. I did measure the spaghetti, but I had my hand in the bag of cheese and pretty darn close to an ounce on... and I was heading back for just another handful. Cheese is one of those foods I just have problems with. It's also the only dairy I can take. Milk never sits well, and yogurt for some reason makes my stomach heave. I did stop myself, but I know this is how I start to slip. Caught it this time but it reminds me that I still have to be very vigilant with some foods.

Heatherdw - good thing (heading for lower cal options). I'm sorry you have angst over this.

Rainbowsmiles - hello yourself

Carol - hooray, I guess it's officially weight-loss week. I'm like you, very impatient. I really try not to, but I feel with all the good eating, the dropping of the bad habits, and the exercise... well, it should just fall off. I know, not realistic. This is probably one of the reasons I got to this point in the first place.

Cyn - a weekend away is always a good thing. You should definitely do it.

Sharon - is it an older vehicle? I've got an old ('95) Pathfinder 4WD and it seemed like a couple of years ago it was constantly needing attention. That seems to have slowed down a bit, although that could be because I'm not driving it as much.

Debbie - I did get the cherries this morning. I ended up getting an 11lb bucket of sour cherries and a 5.5lb bucket of sweet cherries. I'll likely get into them tomorrow afternoon or just after that. I'm very much looking forward to it.

Debimitch - it could have been worse. I'm not the type that could stop at 2 candies, so don't beat yourself up too much.

Nancy - I just think it's so impressive that you're putting yourself out there in the first place. I know I couldn't do it, although at some point I will have to I suppose.

Dmpls - sounds like a good day with your food. The turkey chili sounds good too.

Well, I think I'll pretty much call it a day and settle down to watch some television. Hope everyone has a good night.

Hiya Peeps - listen very carefully - I so missed not exercising on Saturday and Sunday this week that if it happens again I may just do it on my own. No remind me when I need it.

Debbie - you are right - I was on cloud 9 today with the loss this week. What a great feeling after so long and trying to be patient.

Anne - you are so right about it getting me there in the first place.

Nancy - I think dating would be scary if put back in that situation. Is it possible to start doing some things in more of a group social situation where the possibility of meeting people is more natural than forced? BTW - I missed you - how's dance class?

Battle - what's almond breeze? Macy's - wow - I forgot about Macy's.

DMPLS - welcome back to work. I spread out my breakfast too - I seem to be hungrier so I'll eat a banana - then a couple hours later my oatmeal and sometimes a string cheese before lunch. Glad to hear you're back to work - must mean you're feeling better.

Hey Cyn - missed you too! You deserve a great big hug for being so welcoming to those who need a place to live. The getaway sounds well deserved too!

Hiya Heather - things settling down any for you?

Annie - you OK?

Catherine - swim today?

I am going to adjust my ticker starting weight to be my highest (that I know of) now that I have reached the first mini goal. It is only 5 lbs heavier but didn't want to do it until I honestly met the goal. I also have decided my next mini goal will be the next 10% lost - that will take me into unchartered territory - well at least for many years.

Hugs to everyone -
Carol

Carol: I am sooooo happy for you getting out of the 310's. I think your next goal is a great one. That is pretty much what I do, 10% of my current weight with a couple of exceptions. Good luck.

Julee: Sorry your b-day plans seem smashed. I love that your DH stepped up and told his mom that wasn't what you wanted though. Good for him and good for you to have a man that loves you. Hugs.

Debbie: I never made it to the mall on Sunday. DH and I went for a drive to Kellogg, ID, Silver Mountain. It was a lovely drive with snow everywhere. lol. Congrats to you getting into size 24's. I think it is about time I try on some too. The 26's are really baggy on me. Good job. What a great feeling.

Heather: 1st of all, Happy Birthday. So sorry I missed wishing you a happy birthday on your day. 2nd, I am so very impressed by your rock climbing. It really inspires me to give it a try when I reach my goal or closer to it. Hugs to you.

Sharon!!!!! -7 is amazing. You rock. Great job girl!

Peggy: I think a few more pounds and I will have to go to Macy's and check it out.

Rat: I have had a few men flirt with me lately and it really makes me self conscience. I makes me wonder why are they doing that. Just know you are a real beauty not only inside but outside as well and men are going to be attracted to that!

DMPLS: Wooohoo on another -4. You are doing so well.

Sandy: Welcome back. I missed you. Glad things are going okay and you are under 300! Great job. Happy Birthday to your miss Abby too. Sorry SD is being a pill.

Tina: Hugs to you on being up 2. Hopefully it is mostly water weight. Sorry you are working so much. I have to work pretty much more than 50 hours per week each week too so I know how stressful and tired it can be. Hugs.

Anne: Congrats on the weigh in and I love your new avatar. You look amazing!

Wenny: woo hoo for getting into 22 jeans! Great job.

HeatherDW: so sorry that your family isn't as sensative as you would hope right now. Hugs to you hun.

Cyn: That is so sweet that you let your brother live with you for a bit. I hope you and your DH get to go away someplace, just the two of you.

Nancy: Hugs. Glad you figured things out before you did any damage to yourself. Hugs again.

Well, I was MIA on Monday because the mandatory meeting really left me feeling depressed. We all had to meet there for lunch, where I work, I only ate 2 baby carrotts and 2 sweet pea pods and a tiny cube of honey due mellon. The president of our company spoke and the vice president spoke. It sounded like sour grapes to me but, I just listend until the VP stated we are not to talk to anyone that used to work with us that we may still be friends with about what was said in the meeting. She stated that,"those people act like our friends but they are not". She also said," if you don't want to stand and fight with us we understand and just let us know. We want you to stand and fight with us but it's okay if your not up for the fight". I really didn't understand what that meant but just listened. First thing when I got to work today 2 of my bosses and 1 co-worker were in the bosses' office and I heard my name mentioned. When I rounded the corner they stopped talking. They asked me to come in and speak with them. They wanted to know how I felt about the meeting and about work in general etc. I was completely honest with them and let them know that I am very dissappointed and the only reason I was hanging out for the RFP results were so I can apply for a different position within the company because my position isn't what I enjoy doing. They said they were really concerned about me and thought I may just walk. I let them know that is not my style to just up and walk out the door without notice. They encouraged me to look for another job but they would like me to fight the good fight with them to try to get the contract. In my opinion, the state has made up their mind, they are not going to change it and offer it to us now. Later in the day today, the executive director and my supervisor came into my office and told me that the new company is already calling staff and offering them positions with them and that if they call me to offer me a job I am not supposed to talk with them. I think that is rediculous. I would like to hear what they have to offer but my current company said I was to tell them I can't talk to them at this time. If I get a phone call from them I will give them my home number and have them call me at home. So, it is kind of stressful there working with a bunch of people that are not able to understand we didn't get the contract. The company I work for is planning on fighting the decision with an appeal. So, I am still slowly looking for another job elsewhere.

Other news, I had a blood test today to check all the nutrient levels in my body since surgery. I will get the results at my 6 months check up next week. I worked out with the personal trainer today in weights. She kicks my butt. lol.

Hope you are all well.

Blessings,
Annie

I am buried under a pile of grading but just wanted to pop my head up and say that I am proud of you Annie -- you as a person! It sounds like you need to get out of that job, but I love it when people can speak their minds.

Carol-Yes, I went to the pool. I got my whole 90 minutes in this time. I’m starting to get my timing back. My upper body is already showing some firmness that I had lost. My legs of course are still huge, and floppy in the water. Sometimes it feels like trying to drag buckets through the water. Himself is sore, but he hangs in there with me.

Annie-They don’t have the right to tell you not to talk to other employers unless you signed a confidentiality agreement or a non-compete agreement. You are getting some real on the job training on how not to run a company or be a manager. Remember them well as you climb the ladder. You will, you know, someday you will be the boss.

I’ve been MIA because I’ve been working on my mid term paper, already sent in even though it isn’t due until Friday, and I’ve been trying to put at least 4000 words a day on my book. I only got 2300 today. I think I was just too tired after the pool. I’d better get used to it, because starting next week, I’m going to get to go 3 times a week. It has warmed up some here, and it is a lot nicer out. I’m seeing some thaw, but that just leads to snow melt/re-frozen at night icy sidewalks. I can walk really fast on the dry parts, and then crawl when I come to the black ice parts. At least they are actually easy to see. I slipped on the first ice of the season, and refuse to slip on the last.

Anne- yes cheese does that to me too! Im Hispanic & Dh is Italian so the cheesier the better especially on baked pasta!!! LOL I have to serve it on our plates now instead of just dumping it into the pan!

Carol- CONGRATS!!!! On the 10% WL!!!!! WHOOOHOOOO!!! yes feeling much better than last week! Sinus junk is still there & the cough*tinkle LOL but it is much better! I’m glad to hear that Im not the only one to spread out breakfast! I would eat way too much calories if I didn’t do it that way!

Cyn-We just had my SIL staying with us for about 4mths and all I can say is Take your DH up on that time away!!! Hehehehe my SIL is not the most kind or compassionate person. She lost over 100+ lbs with WLS (gone wrong) and would comment on everything I cooked “ewwwe I don’t like that...etc...” it was very difficult for me while she was here. You need that alone time with him so snag it!

Annie-Sorry to hear about your job/bosses, I don’t think they can tell you who you can speak to or not.....unless when you were hired you signed something about switching companys if a contract didn’t get renewed. I know I signed something like that with Neilson Media when I worked for them....that I would not/could not work for another company that did that same work for so long after working with them....and also I could never discuss how they did their research etc.... Hopefully your days there will be less stressful and you will find something else before the job is completely closed. Personal trainer!!! Wow wish I could get one of those!!!

CatherineM-what kind of book are you writing?

Rainbowsmiles-hope you are doing ok! Miss your positive motivationial posts!!!

Well I am up and running late now that I posted comments LOL
I need to get dressed and pack lunch! Made Dh’s lunch & thermos of coffee for him around 5am had a cup of coffee & a Shake ......I just didn’t feel like having oatmeal (I’ll probably feel it later today LOL)

Take care everyone! Have a great day!

Good Morning All - winter doesn't want to end. Anyone experiencing sunshine and a few warm temperatures - could you share a bit please?

Annie - oh hun - what a drama you are having. I'm so sorry this is happening to you - especially newly back in the work force. Trust me - not all companies are like that to work for. You will find a "home" - but remember it is a means to an end - it does not define who you are. I'm with Heather - I'm so proud of you - as a person. Loving, compassionate, strong, and confident - not to mention beautiful.

Catherine - good job at the pool. Are you up for 3 times? That's impressive. I so can't wait to get in the water on Sunday - my trainer was afraid I would not want to do it since we had to move the starting week back a week. No way - he may never get me out. Apparently there is a man who does water exercises at the hospital pool also. He is in the water 5 hours a day and has lost a significant amount of weight. The support from the staff is amazing at the hospital. Glad you are able to get 3 times a week in.

Move your bodies, drink your water and SMILE.

Hugs,
Carol

Morning all! Whew! I am exhausted. I had to take a personal day yesterday as I woke up to a basement with water coming in. I vacuumed and pumped ALL day...with minimal breaks into the night last night. I collapsed into bed at 9:30 last night and this morning every muscle in my body aches. Who knew I had so many!?!?!

Anyway, I stayed OP in spite of wanting to just eat crap to keep me going...which makes ZERO sense...but thats ME! Stress eater and boy was I STRESSED!!

Anyway, things are drying out this AM and I am getting ready to leave for work. I will check in later. Have a great day peeps!

Good Morning everyone.
I started in last night with a head cold. I have always had alot of sinus problems. Had done great for a few months. I am out of my sinus spray and thats most likely the cause of this mess. Daughter also woke up all stopped up. Hubby never seems to get sick.
His dr appointment yesterday went good, my husband has bipolar disorder and stuggles daily. The dr suggest we see a specalist at U of L. I may try to call and see if we can get in during the summer months. It will just give our dr a second opion...meds dont seem to help him alot. University of Lousville is known for awesome drs. Its a 3 hour trip each way so guess we will be spending the night. At this point we are willing to try anything.
I ended up eating some nuts last night after my smoothie. I have a feeling I was extra hungry yesterday because i was in the process of getting sick. I cant even taste my coffee this morning. Looks like I am heading to Walmart today and get my meds refilled.
annie - I am sorry your job is so stressful right now. I would give them my home number also. Your job cant control what you do on your own time.

Anne- cheese is my weakness also. I really have to measure it when I put it on my salad to keep from overdoing it. I also have to make myself not eat a pinch while the bag is open. Its the main dairy I get also, but I did buy some yogurt and had a smoothie last night.

DMPLS- The weather people are acting like the mess may start early tommorow for us. I hate when the sleet starts during the school day. My youngest drives and hasnt got alot of experience driving on it. I also run an in home daycare and keep teachers kids, I worry about them driving home with the babies on ice.
Heather- good luck on grading the papers.

Have a great day everyone
debi

DMPLS-I’m writing a book on the events that led up to my being attacked and almost killed 17 years ago, and the aftermath, the disabilities, weight gain, etc. I had been working on a book exclusively about my weight loss, but I realized that the story needed a beginning.

Carol-I think I’m ready for 3 times a week, I’m not sure he is. I have the familiar aches that I used to go through the first couple of weeks of basketball or softball practice. He never played sports. The funny thing is that if I hadn’t been hurt, he might not be going as diligently as he is. He’s afraid I’ll get hurt, so he putters along, carries my gym bag, holds my hand getting on and off the bus. He’s my own personal towel boy. He had to go to bed early last night he was so tired. The only thing athletic he’s ever done is carry around a big stack of books. He reminds me that he did spend a summer with NASA at the South Pole. He was a lot younger then, but weren’t we all.

Peggy-It makes sense that you wanted to eat constantly. Your body relies on the fat closest to your main blood vessels for quick energy. If you are a pear, you don’t have as much of that to begin with. If you are dieting, the quick stuff is the first weight you lose. I think I have had diets sabotaged because of needing quick energy to deal with my increased activity. The key for me is 10 small meals while working. Lots of fruit or protein. I’m so sorry about the flood. The last time I dealt with one, it was raw sewage, so I feel your pain.

Debimitch-I lived 15 years with an ultra-rapid cycling bipolar. I lost count of the number of different med changes she went through. They finally found a combination of epilepsy meds that worked. Just keep trying.

I also woke up stuffed up at 5 this morning. With high blood pressure, I can’t just take a decongestant. I used my neti pot, put some vicks on, and am sucking on a menthol cough drop. That’s got everything loosing up. I deal with constant sinus stuff. The right side of my face was kind of smushed in, and it left a bunch of little areas for the green stuff to lie in wait. I never really get rid of it, I just try to live in balance with it. This morning it tipped its side of the teeter totter a bit too much, so I slammed back. I'm up now, so I figured I might as well go to work.

Catherine - Interesting to know! I am pear shaped, so that makes sense. I was eating my usual food every couple of hours, but man...I could have used a BIG meal! LOL!

Raw sewage? Eeew! Glad I was just dealing with water. Ick!

I got out of the shower and got dressed for work this AM...I said to hubby "Oh I feel so girly after wearing my sweats and crocs all day yesterday!" LOL!

Heather: Thanks for the nice comments. I do feel so much stronger these days mentally. Not like a witing flower.

Catherine: Hugs to you and please be careful on the ice.

DMPLS: Nope, I didn't sign anything except confidentiality for the clients I deal with. The personal trainer came with my program fee when I had weight loss surgery. Otherwise I wouldn't be able to afford her. For 2 sessions a week it is like $120 or something like that.

Carol: Okay, yesterday it was sooooo sunny and 41 degrees. Today it looks weird. Really foggy, windy and chilly so, I'm with you winter has got her claws in. lol. Have a super day.

Peggy: Have a better day today.

Debmitch: Hope you are feeling better soon.

Well, off to work. Had a bowl of Weight control instant oatmeal with a scoop of protein powder in it for a total of 27 gr. of protein. I feel awake and ready to take on the day. Hope you all have a super great day with lots of water and movement.

Blessings all,
Annie

Cheese lovers...WW is now selling (in grocery stores not at meetings) 3 types of cheese....string cheese, cheddar cheese snacks and pre-bagged pre-shredded cheddar cheese. The shreds come 6 bags to a package and they are pre-portioned out..and they MELT so nicely...largely becuase they are not fat free. WW also manages to get fiber into everything. I know they are 2 points and I am addicted. There is also a lovely kosher market near work and I found some delicious light edam cheese yesterday that is about 60 calories a slice...and also melts!!! YUMMY!!!

Happy Cheese Day!

DMPLS, you sure sound like you've got a good plan going and you're sticking to it. I'm sure the pounds are going to start dropping off of you anytime now.

Debi, I hope your cuddle night was wonderful!

Anne, I'm a cheeseaholic too! I love the stuff and I limit my intake of it totally ever since I started counting my fat intake for the day. I couldn't believe how much fat was in it, or maybe I didn't want to realize how fattening it was.
I'm glad you saw what you were doing and put a halt to it. Great control!!

Annie, I tried on another pair of 24's which are considered "skinny jeans". At least that's what they were called when I bought them. The legs are super skinny, at least for me, and last month I couldn't even get them pulled up because the legs were so tight, but I got them on yesterday, the legs still a bit tight but not bad, and the waist was big!! It IS such a great feeling. Now I'm ready to buy the next size down which will be the size I haven't been in since I don't even remember.
Wow Annie, are those people for real? I can't believe they would treat their employees like that or would even want the employees to know stuff like that. I sure hope you get a call from the other company or find something better for yourself.
Hope your test come out with flying colors!!

Catherine, isn't it great getting out and getting that swimming in? And toning the body is the greatest perk! I hope the work on your book goes smoothly. I want to read it when it comes out. Sounds really interesting. Hope you get to feeling better too.

Peggy, that's one way of getting some exercise in. Take care of those achy muscles!

Not much going on here. We had two beautiful sunny days but back to the clouds again we go. It's suppose to rain. At least we got a couple things done outside. I keep eyeballing all the blackberry bushes (we are surrounded) and want to get out there and cut them out. Not all, just most of them. They spread like wildfire!
Staying OP and getting exercise and water in. So I hope to have another weight loss on Friday.
Everyone have a wondeful day, and stop to smell the roses! (if you can find 'em)
Debbie

Hi peeps,

Hope you're all having a good day.

To all the cheese lovers: I hear ya. Cheese is a big issue for me. I used to eat mountains of it, paired with the carb du jour.

Carol: Almond Breeze is almond milk. It is delicious. I like it better than regular, soy or rice milk. The unsweetened almond milk by Almond Breeze is only 40 calories a cup, and tastes like much more.

Anne: I am always shocked by just how quickly I can slip back into old patterns. It's frightening. It is a reminder that we can never stop being mindful and vigilant.

Annie: What a terrible, outrageous group of managers you've got there. Their behavior is shameful. I hope you find something else soon. In the meantime, good for you for staying centered and seeing outrageous behavior for what it is.

Debbie: WTG on the size 24s being too big!

Debmitch: Feel better!

Hi and hugs to everyone I missed.