Nancy: It is good that you made some realizations about your actions when you are with your parents. I hope that the realizations are things that you can work on before you go back. Glad you got to spend time with them.

Sandy: Tomorrow will be a better op day for you. I'm sure of it!

Catherine: Glad you were able to get some work done for schoo.. So sorry about the bump on the nogin. Hope it gets better very soon.

Carol: I hope you have a blast on your cruise. Would it help to tell your DH why you don't want to go horseback riding? I bet he really is clueless. One time my dh was getting so angry at me for not wearing the seat belt in his truck. I finally broke down and told him it was because it didn't fit. He felt bad for getting angry at me and said we will work on it together. That was a nice feeling to have support. I hope you have the same. Hugs.

Angie: Before you know it you will be well out of the 350's and into the 340's! Good job working out even when You don't feel like it.

Rat: Sorry your day wasn't the best. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better one.

I heard from the county and I didn't get the job. Kind of hard for me not to immediately go to, "what is wrong with me that they didn't pick me". I pulled myself together after a minute of grieving for my "dream job" and told God that I know he has big plans for me and I will trust Him. I really struggle in that area of not trying to take everything on. I grew up taking everything on and trying to fix everything so it is hard not to try. Even though I couldn't do anything about it. lol. Well, I got another phone call from another company that I had sent my resume to. My interview with them is tomorrow at 3 p.m. I have about 30 resumes out there floating around. Hopefully soon someone will give me a call and a job. lol.

I have tons of little candy bars in a glass pumpkin that I have had for a couple of weeks. I almost felt like having one today. I didn't but the urge was there. Not sure if it was because TOM is coming any day or the stress I am feeling. I hope just TOM because I haven't stressed eaten since Joel's mom was here in May for Mother's Day. Then it was just salad but I was supposed to be on a liquid diet. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.

On a good note, I scored a huge garbage bag full of clothes from the clothing exchange. Lots of size 22/24's and lots of 26/28's that I can wear now. I'll have to save the others for later.

Blessings all,
Annie

Annie - we did have a little chat after the initial one on the horseback riding. It came down to my comfort level - I just couldn't bring myself to tell him how much I weigh. So instead he wants to salsa dance - he is very excited about it - he is a wonderful dancer and I have two left feet. I need to quit using my weight as an excuse not to do things. As he explained, after I said I wasn't comfortable doing that either, we're going to have fun - even if I only learn one step and do it with both left feet we will have a great time - and he reminded me we will never see these people again. Off we go to salsa!!!

Have a great day all

Carol

Hi again,
Meta hope the tooth infection gets better VERY soon.xxxxxxx
Annie, sorry about the job, I'm sure the right one will come along soon! How do you go on with references? I haven't worked since getting pregnant with Gareth, over 7 years ago & haven't done any voluntary work for 5 years, I wanted to go for a job with the local council but I don't have anyone recent to be a referee. Once Aiden starts school full time, after Christmas I'll start being a voluntary literacy tutor (I'm fully qualified to do this as a 'real', lol, teacher) but there's been a lot of cut backs in adult education so I don't expect to get a job there. I'm happy to work in a shop or something, just to contribute to the household finances! What is your 'dream' job? How is your food going, are you eating 'regular' foods yet? I'm SO NOSEY, lol! WTG with all that exercise!!! Were you allowed to do it when you were on liquids? I've been advised to just walk, nothing too strenuous, as the calories in my liquids are only 500 or so a day & it can make you feel ill if you're doing harder workouts.xxxxxx
GG/Carol, see my weight ticker? I rode, but I checked beforehand at the stables, telling them I was very fat, had a bad left knee (the one you mount with) & that I'm nervous after having a VERY frisky Arab/thoroughbred horse of my own (many years ago, lol). The teacher was very good, put me on a SLOW, big-boned horse & made sure she & her hubby were there to help me on/off onto the mounting blocks. I think most horses can carry a decent amount of weight, it's the getting off & on that's a problem! Going for the dance option is a good idea, great exercise, fun & no risk of falling from a great height!!lol Plus there's no embarassing 'Are you too heavy' questions. Enjoy your trip!xxxxxxxx
Nancy, glad you had a great trip, changes of scene can play havoc with our food choices, it's like 'hey I'm on holiday/away from home, I get to eat!!!' at least in my case, WTG on thinking it through. Next time you'll be prepared, so often we eat without thinking, either about what we're doing, why or considering the consequences, you're halfway there (Weight-loss sucess) thinking it through like you have done.xxxxxxx
Battle, WTG on getting SMALLER!! It is so weird jeans/trouser legs getting LONGER, lol, at least it means the old tummy, hips & bottom are getting smaller!!!! I had it happen too, it's a little disconcerting isn't it? About my internet, we are tied to them until NEXT JULY, even though we've threatened them there's not a lot we can do; we checked with the telecom body's legal advice centre. Yes, send them letters, BAD SPELLLS, lol, anything!!!lol.xxxxxx
Torrister, lovely avatar, you look younger, prettier & fresh & healthy in your pic, putting your cute pup in the shade!!lolxxxxxx
bye for now,
xxxxsharon

Morning my chickies!!



DH hubby called in sick to work this AM and he usually wakes me up....oopsie!! I overslept! I did take 15 mins to ride my bike. I know I need more than that, but thats all the time I could spare this AM. Will jump back on tonight for another 15 I think!

Thanks re: my new avatar. I feel so much better these days. I don't know how to describe it. Being on the right level (at least in MY mind the right level since I feel like myself again) makes such a difference in my day to day life.

Battle - I too have suffered the shortening legs syndrome. It is so funny! What I find funny is that I am wearing the *short* length on pants where I used to wear the *average*.

Carol - DANCE!!! Have FUN!! Don't sit on the sidelines. You have someone who wants you out on the dance floor with him....so as Nike says "Just do it!" I wish I had not sat out on the sidelines so much...don't regret not having the most fun ever on your trip!!

I am NOT looking forward to candy at my house tonight. I am stopping on my way home to buy some and I am dumping it all in the last kids of the night as it is NOT staying with me. Chocolate and I are VERY close friends and it tends to set off binging behavior...so I am NOT going there!

Gotta get to work....have a great day everyone!!

My mantra for today is "STEP AWAY FROM THE CANDY!!"
I am in a crappy mood...and it is making me even madder because I love Halloween!! TOM is here, I have a banging , beginning of a cold, and feel like .

I got an email from my nephew's mother(my brother and her share a house and aren't married~another whole long story) and she basically chewed me out because we are busy today and I didn't tell her...she is too cheap to buy candy and doesn't want to be home...I never got the email asking me about this, and her voicemail on my cell didn't show up til 11pm last night. So when I opened my email from her this am, she was ranting about how me and my family don't have any love left for Zach, and just sounded insane!! So I wrote back and told her off...I have been there for her from the day I met her(when my brother called me to tell me I was going to be an Aunt), and have done so much for all of them...It's not my fault she picked a drug addict to have sex with!! They can barely stand each other anymore, she lives upstairs and he lives downstairs, and I am so tired of hearing it all. But when she has the nerve to say I have blown them off...I just told her that yes, we were busy, but Andrew would have loved to take Zach around, but since we have no love left for him, I told her to take him to the mall.
Sorry this rant is so long, but I am so sick of being taken advantage of!!!!! When will I learn???

I hope everyone has a Fun Halloween!!!

Carol: Fun salsa! I think it is great that you are going to do that. Hopefully I can do the same when I go on my cruise next year. My DH would not want to do that but we'll see. lol.

Sharon: Yup. I am eating regular foods, kind of. lol. I can't have fresh fruits or veggies yet they all have to be canned or cooked. My dream job ummmmm I guess if I could go back and go to college right now it would be either physical therapist or social worker. Something where I can really help people. I adore the elderly too. Not sure on that one. I wasn't limited to how much I work out when I was on liquids. I was doing upwards of 2 hours + a day before surgery. At first I was too tired to do that much but after a while I was full of energy.

Peggy: I hope your DH feels better very soon. Good plan for the candy. I'm lucky because I haven't had any sugar pretty much since last November. I feel very in control of my food except yesterday I did want one. Not super bad just thought it would taste good. Anything too sweet right now makes me nauseous.

Donna: sorry that Zach's mom is being such a pain. Hugs. I do know how you feel when you help people out so much and then they expect even more. Never satisfied taking. I think you and I need to learn that sometimes helping certain people isn't really helping them at all. I know I need to learn that. Hugs to you.

My job interview isn't until 3 p.m. so I have all day to prepare and maybe do some cleaning in my livingroom, kitchen and dining room. My DH spent his whole birthday at the hospital with one of the men that he supervises. The hospital called my DH right after I left to go to my group and said they need my DH to go to Spokane WA and get this man and bring him in for a psch eval because they thought he may hurt himself. So, DH went and picked him up and took him to the hospital. He was out until after 9 pm last night. They are keeping the man for evaluation. Hopefully he will get the help he needs.

I scored "BIG" last night with 2 big hefty size garbage bags of size 26/28 clothes and 22/24 clothes. MOst of the 22/24 sizes are casual stuff but I'm so happy to have them. I was able to wash 2 loads of them last night when I got home from group before DH came home. Some of them really smell like cigeretts and being a non-smoker that is rough.

I hope everyone has a wonderful, op, CANDY-LESS day. Happy Halloween.
Blessings,
Annie

Hi everybody! I was at the dentist this am, and it turns out I have a whole little laundry list of isses from a stupid routine !*(#&(# tooth extraction. I got a) an infection of the tissues surrounding the site b) something called dry socket which is not an infection but very painful and c) stress cankers! Yay me and dental complications! I'm frozen solid right now, and I've got some new big gun painkillers so I'm as happy as one can be in such circumstances.

I've had a couple of these little 'not feeling well' things back to back and it's struck me how much not feeling well physically can make me want to eat. Outside of last weeks binge already confessed I haven't overeaten, but I sure have thought about it more times than I usually do. I have tried to pinpoint what it is I'm trying to 'feed' when I'm feeling like that and I think maybe it's just general glumness and frustration, but I'm not sure.

So many of us get fat partly because we fail to prioritize taking care of ourselves and our physical, emotional and spiritual needs. Sometimes we lose touch with how to take care of ourselves well. I haven't exercised nearly as much this last week or two because I just haven't felt physically well. I've struggled with this because mouth issues do not technically prevent you from taking as many walks as you did before. So what is taking care of yourself? Forcing yourself to exercise because of the benefits, or letting yourself be still and quiet when that feels like what you want to do? I just don't know. I had gotten so out of touch with my body that I think I'll be relearning this stuff for a long time.

It's the last day of October, and I've lost less than 5 pounds this month which annoys me to no end. Feel very behind on personals, but reading everything and thinking of everybody and hope to catch up soon. Off to try and eat greens, carrots, onions, celery, a scattering of various nuts and seeds and some mushed up tuna and Miracle whip with half a face.

Meta YOU'VE LOST, ok 5 lbs isn't what you wanted but it's a LOSS!!!! Go easy on yourself, illness, pain & infections can make you feel so ICK. You've done WELL!!!! SO THERE!!!lolxxxxxxx
xxxxxsharon

Annie, sorry you didn't get the job...but keep the faith because you're so right about God having something bigger for you to do.
I had to laugh about your "stress eating" back on Mother's Day. Even though you were suppose to be on a liquid diet, I WISH all I did was stress eat a salad. You are doing wonderful, my friend. Just keep your head on straight and you can get thru those times of wanting to eat something bad for you. That's great you got all those clothes. Sure does save on the budget when you go thru sizes so fast.What a sweetie your hubby is to go and take the man to the hospital. I hope everything is ok with him. Where are you and DH going to go on your cruise? I would love to do the Alaska one. Ew cig smoke...can you get that out of the clothes?

Carol, I think it would be so much fun to go on the cruise and learn to salsa!! What a great opportunity to learn something and have a great time. Just go and enjoy, relax, have that second honeymoon and pretend no one else is around except for you and hubby!!

Peggy, I'm so glad they found the right magic meds to make your life better. You look so much happier and youthful. And Emmit ain't so bad lookin' either...

Donna, definitely a good mantra!!! I hope your day gets better and by the time the trick or treaters come around, you can enjoy them. This too shall pass!

Meta, o that sounds sooooo painful!! YAY on getting the big time meds though. Take care. You asked some pretty good questions of yourself about forcing exercise or being still when you don't feel up to it. I still don't exercise hardly at all and I'm not consistent and if I don't feel good, I won't. My reasons sound like excuses, and they probably are. If you are in alot of pain, I don't see how exercise would help except make it get worse. I dunno, just my humble opinion. Five pounds is better than no pounds, don't be so hard on yourself. You're still moving in the right direction. to you, just take care.

Today we have to build a cover for our trash bin. We have to go to the dump once a month or so, but lately the little field mice have been having a field day in the trash. They've torn through all the bags and there is stuff everywhere and not very pleasant to have to clean up. We also have the little varmits under our house, (modular home) so we have to do something about that too.
Yesterday I had some chinese food. I'm just owning up to it. I've been OP except the last couple of days, but recommiting again today. Water has been tough for me too because of it getting so cold. I wish I liked hot drinks, but I just don't.
I did get to go to the mall and get my lotion and shower gel for getting to my 50lbs as a reward. I just love Bath and Body stuff!!!
I don't have to worry about the candy being here because we are so far out of town, and at the far end of a road that no one comes out here. Good in some ways, bad in others. I miss not seeing the little kids in costumes.
Well, everyone have a good day and stay OP!!
Happy Halloween!!
Debbie

Hi chickies,

I can't believe this, but TOM is here and I have had NO cravings, no crazy, out-of-control desires to binge on fat, sugar, chocolate, anything not nailed down. None! I am incredibly thankful for this gift and every other day/occasion that is easier than expected. I don't believe I've ever had a month like this.

I'm fortunate in that I don't have to deal with resisting the candy today. I'm in my office by myself, so there is no one bringing in goodies to tempt me. I live in a security apartment building, and there is only one child the right age for trick-or-treating, and I'm sure his parents will take him elsewhere.

In years past, the day after Halloween was the real witching day for me. All the Halloween candy on sale for 50% off was a very big draw for me, and I'd load up on all the bargain candy. Not this year! I'm staying out of the grocery store for a couple of days so they can get rid of the candy and I can avoid the temptation. Bargain prices + access are a bad combination for me.

I hope you all have a creepy, crawly day!

-----------
Annie: sorry you didn't get the job. Keep trying. I know you'll find something.

I wonder if Oxy Clean or something like that will remove the smoke smell from the clothes? It would be difficult for me, too, to have the smoke smell.

Gggirls: salsa dancing sounds like fun. I also have 2 left feet, but have had lots of fun trying to dance. That is a good compromise for your hubby, and I think you will end up enjoying yourself a lot.

Sharon/Nancy: I'm the same when it comes to vacations/holidays/visits. Once I'm out of my environment, it's time for me to *treat* myself. These occasions are a great time to plan and decide on moderation. I continually work on how to enjoy and indulge moderately.

Nancy, I hope you're back OP now and doing well.

Torister: Let me chime in as another who loves your new avatar. You're glowing. There is a whole new aura about you.

Donna: good for you for standing up to her. She deserved to be put in her place. Some people cannot appreciate a nice and giving person. They only see a way in to abuse and manipulate.

Hiya guys, just stopping by quickly to wish everyone a Happy Halloween! I have a job interview today...actually 1 of 2 this week and I am nervous as nervous can get. Also, why is it when I start to watch what I eat all I can think about is food..ugh! Have a great remainder of the day. ~Leesa

Carol-I also found out recently that I couldn’t get on a helicopter over 250lbs. so I know what you mean. Most people when looking at me are clueless as to how much I weigh. I have always looked like I weigh about 50lbs. less than I actually do. That’s why everyone thought the picture of me in my gown made me look like I had lost weight. I wish.

Rat-I went to a conference like that once where there were hard candies out, and I ate so many that I burned a canker sore in my mouth. I think they do it to keep people hyper to pay attention.

Annie-I’m so sorry about the job. That just blows. They always judge us by our looks, and the funny thing is that every job I’ve ever had, I’ve done the work of two people most of the time. Someone is going to take a chance on you, and get a dream employee. Tell your hubby that I have had to make those kind of mercy runs, and have spent many an evening sitting and waiting for someone to come do a psych evaluation. I even had one try to jump out while we were on the highway. That’s not easy on the nerves. I hope he is doing okay.

Sharon-If I was to get on a horse, an Arabian wouldn’t do. I’d have to have a draft horse like a Clydesdale or maybe a water buffalo.

Peggy-How I handle my pants magically getting longer is that I sew elastic in the bottom of all my pants. That also helps keep snow and cold drafts out of my pant legs.

Donna-Family drama makes it so hard to be civil, and stay OP. I sometimes wonder if skinny people have the same kind of drama in their families, or if just us fat chicks. Do you suppose there could be a connection? We all seem to be such people pleasers, and then get angry by overeating.

Meta-You can always tell when something is serious if the doctor gives you the good stuff. I hear you about being out of touch with your body. I know I have been for a long time. I have trouble sometimes deciding what is a middle age ache/pain, and an actual injury.

Debbie-You’ve got to love having varmints under the house. My avatar right now is how I dealt with them. That was in the back. Under the house looked like the surface of the moon. At least I didn’t have to mow around the holes under the house. I’m not sure which was worse, the hole the gophers made, or the ones the basset hound made trying to root them out.

Battle-I’m not going to the store for a few days either. I went to Walmart today, and people were nuts with buying the candy. I saw a woman with an entire cart full. I wondered how much was for trick-or-treaters and how much was for her, and I wondered if in years past people in stores looked at my cart and wondered the same thing.

Leesa-Good luck with the interview.
I am off to do home work like a good girl, at least while he is gone and the house is quiet. I have to email my professor and ask him to provide midterm grades to the people who are paying my way. I guess they want to make sure they aren’t wasting their money before they agree to next semester. It has been awhile since I’ve gotten grades. I’m a bit nervous.

Just wanted to poke my head in quick. I ended up walking for an hour yesterday. I did a 30 minute walk today would have been more but it's windy here. Eating is improving but will be having pizza tonight but staying away from the candy.

Happy Halloween all. No candy for me today - hasn't been an easy day though. Sounds like we will all be glad when this is over. Good idea ladies to not go to the store for a few days until its all gone. Lots of food today at the office - oh how I some days wish smells weren't such a trigger for me.

Thank you all for your support on the salsa dancing. We will have a great time - may have him wear his steel toes boots so I don't hurt his feet when I step on them.

Seems I've bunged up the knee again so no exercise for the last two days - need to find something that doesn't hurt it - seems the yoga and walking irritate it. I actually do miss the exercise - remind me of that at the appropriate time.

Hope tomorrow is a much better feeling day for all of us - with the treat being the trick of staying OP.

Hugs,
Carol

Meta: Get well sweetie. I'm so sorry that you are in pain with your teeth. You are doing fine. Hugs.

Debbie: We are going to go to the Mexican Riviera. I would choose Alaska too but we are going with all three of my sisters and their families too and I got outvoted. lol. I'm so glad that you got your lotions etc for your reward. What scents did you get?

Battle: Great job staying away from the sweets. Have a happy and safe Halloween.

Leesa: I hope you had a great interview. I had one today too. They seemed to like me but they are not making a decision until 2 weeks from now. UGH! I need a job now. lol Good luck hun.

Catherine: Hugs. I'm happy to hear that you are getting some school work done. Do they trick or treat in Canada? I am really that dumb that I don't know.

Jessie: Great job on all that walking.

Carol. Yipee for you being Candy free today. YOu are doing so amazing.

Well, my interview this afternoon was great. We actually seemed to click. I will have to wait and see. Like normal there is about 40 people for this one job. lol. They won't be doing any deciding for about 2 weeks. I did send another resume yesterday and I got an email from the company saying they couldn't open it and to please fax my resume to them. I faxed it but I know it is after hours there because that is when I opened it. Anyway, it should be there first thing in the morning for them. They are hiring for 2 office managers positions. The pay is really, really good on those but again, we'll see.

We have had quite a few trick or treaters this evening so far and it is barely dark, 6:30 almost. My Dh loves to see the costumes. I think it is because when he was a boy he never got to do any of that stuf because of their religion. Anyway, he is manning the door and I am manning the dogs. lol.

Hope you are all doing well and enjoying the evening.
Blessings,
Annie