I am a horror to my children most of the time I am sure. lol. My way or the highway. We do not live at the Holiday Inn. We do not have: room service, maids, nor a free taxi service. We do not live in our own little world. Each person in the family is responsible for the house, yard and cars. They may not thank me now but someday when they know how to clean their house, prepair good meals and enjoy clean clothes. They will be glad mom taught them how to do it instead of doing it for them all their lives.

When my daughter turned about 10 I said ok my first job is done, doing almost everything. I now have a new job, making you help me do things and do it right. When she turned about 15, my son would have been about 19 I said ok my second job is done now I move on to my third job. Making you do things. I am not the one that leaves things lay around. I am not the one that doesn't brush the cat so on and so on. I have gotten a promotion I am the supervisor, from time to time I will be a working supervisor but for day to day chores I will make sure you do what needs done and it is done as it should be. We are not talking hard stuff just sweeping and dusting and such.

The other day we were chatting and joking and she said ok Mom. I will be 17 does your job change again lol. I said YUP you and your brother think you are grown up, you don't need old mom to tell you what to do. Thats fine. There will be a list of things for each of you to do each day. Sorry if there isn't time for fun after you are done with what is on the list. That is the world of being a grown up. She looked at me smiled and said, ummm Mom I am not quite grown up yet. Have to love her.

haha Shy Moment, I helped my mom clean on the weekends and I had the chore of cleaning the bathroom (in addition to making sure my room was clean, but that's a given). I did my laundry occasionally as I got older. The rest? My mom did it for us. Your kids WILL thank you later, because they will actually KNOW how to do the dishes when they're out on their own ; I didn't! I squawked and gawked at dirty dishes and it took me FOREVER to get through them because I was grossed out; I'm a hygeine freak... and instead of sucking it up and doing them, I had to make a big fuss. Your kids won't. And you can feel free to tell them about what I just told you!

daaaaang, mom2mollie - 80 hours? No wonder some of the romance might be disappearing; if he has to work that much, he's probably EXHAUSTED! Work might also be all he thinks about because it takes up so much of his time. Just a thought.

Yep shane. That's totally true. He's at the end of the fiscal year this month, so this week is especially hard. Next week/month should be better. And we've decided I'm quitting my at-home job, too. My stress is not worth the little money I'm making.
So really, I have no reason to whine. But sometimes it just feels good...

I want to thank you all for making me feel better.
I feel guilty when I tell people no, I feel guilty when my sons girl friend breaks up with him, I feel guilty when my daughters hair doesn't bounce like the girls on tv lol. I am good at feeling guilty. Doesn't keep me from being Attila The Hun around here but I still feel guilty lol. My daughter read one of my Erma Bombeck books one time, she said oh my gosh Mom you could have written this book, you sound just like her. How could I tell her the woman is my hero. lol

momtomollie
I was lucky the kids father changed just about as many diapers as I did and he was great with the kids when they were little.

This is the first year I have left the kids with their father while I went to the camp grounds for the weekend. Keep in mind my 20 year old is only about 13-16 most of the time. This year is the first time I have thought about myself before them once in awhile. Guess you can't have this or that I am getting lean cuisines for myself.

Night
you know when I tell my daughter what you said she will tell me to tell you. You are more than welcome to come do her chores lol. AND what do you mean keeping your room clean is a gimme, HA I am always worried the health department is going to come and put a quarantined sign on my front door because of their rooms. I swear I have seen crawl out of their rooms at night as I am going to my side of the upstairs. I don't dare go to their side when the sun goes down.

I have changed things around here. I am no longer a door matt. I no longer am going to scream until A. I have no voice or B the sound police are at my door complaing about the noise. I now make sure each night their rooms are clean or they are grounded the next day, no exceptions I don't care what they have planned.

Ewww, Shy Moment, I don't blame you for threatening to ground them if their rooms are not clean! I am very much a clean freak by nature - I can be messy, but hygeine is CRUCIAL for me and always has been. I've never had a disgusting room - maybe that's why my mom didn't feel the need to intervene and I never got yelled at for it. My SISTER, on the other hand... ... but she was the obedient one, so as soon as my mom told my sister to clean her room, she just went and did it. I was the rebel !

It sounds like you have an awesome current husband, then. And feel to complain here any time - that's what this thread is FOR

mom2mollie - what IS your at home job?

My children are like night and day in some ways. My son, Mr. Slobola. Will complain and moan and groan about doing something. Do it half way and be made to do it over and over again until it is done right BUT he will do it. My loving daughter will say she did it and then I find out it wasn't done. I would rather they say they didn't do it or not do it right and be made to do it again. Than to say they did it when they didn't. She never understands why she is in more trouble than he is lol. " But Mom he didn't do it right and you made him do it 1,346 times before he got it right." " Yes, but he didn't LIE and say he did, it did he."

Mom2mollie
How do you get to quit your " at home job " lol in my state they call that desertion lol. I have been trying to figure out how to quit my " at home job " for years lol.

Haha! Not quitting the "at home job" of mommyhood! lol

I do medical transcription at home (type dictations of doctors for patient reports). It was GREAT when I was pregnant and on bedrest. But now that there is a fun little munchkin to play with, I can't get it all done!! I want to focus on her... and she is what I call a "high energy" baby... one day soon I'm going to turn around and she'll be gone, crawling all over! She's drooling on me as I type...

Oh there are some " at home jobs " I love and always have. Cleaning the toilet is not one of them lol.

Our doc doesn't even have anyone that does that anymore. They all have a lap top that they take to each patient. You pay for them to sit there and enter everything in while you are there. Now from the min you see them until they min your file is updated you pay for. One less person they have to pay and they now charge more.

Some of this technological age B.S. is really sad. What you mentioned, Shy Moment, is an example. Laughably bad.

Since this is the self pity thread, I have some b-itching to do today!

Sometimes, I just want to give up on losing weight. I want to pig out on fast food, then go to Sonic and get a cookie dough blast, then go to Dairy Queen and get a blizzard, then go to Cold Stone and get lots of ice cream! I know, I'm craving ice cream hardcore. I'm also craving Munchies. Some chicken nuggets and french fries would be pretty nice, too. Or a Whataburger! Damn it. I want BAD FOOD

Anyway, I've been busting my *** exercising just like I always have done since beginning my weight loss journey. I'm eating an average of 1,251 calories a day. According to fitday, I should have lost three pounds last week. Did I? NO! I LOST NOTHING!!! I sometimes just want to say SCREW THIS, especially being I'm trying sooo hard and the stall just won't end! I have 10-20 pounds to lose, still! If it was just 5, maybe I wouldn't be so MAD!

I'm going to hit the gym hard this weekend and do some strenuous power lifting even if it starts to hurt and I get sore. I'm going to make sure I spend an hour on the elliptical without stopping. AND I'm going to ride my bike to the gym.

I HATE LOSING WEIGHT. I see skinny people eating fattening foods and a part of me gets mad. THEY get to eat CRAP while I'm trying to make HEALTHY FOOD CHOICES but their bodies are LEAN and MINE IS NOT when I'm probably in much better physical shape? No friggin' fair!

Shane, don't get frustrated. Weight loss slows down towards the end, and we all have plateaus. Hang in there! You're doing great, so keep with it.

A few suggestions (forgive me if this is uninvited, or you already know this stuff - and I know the purpose of this thread is to rant, and we all love to rant sometimes): Your body gets used to the exercises you do, and gets "more efficient" at doing those exercises (read: burns fewer calories), so you need to make sure you're changing it up. Instead of increasing your time on the elliptical, try to change your pace, or hop over to the treadmill or the stairmaster. Pedal as fast as you can for 5 minutes, then slow down for 5, repeat - get your heart rate up. You may want to try to change your type of workouts and intensity to jumpstart your body burning those calories. You say you're averaging 1251 cal/day. How long has this been your average? If you're working out that much, that hard, is it possible that you aren't eating enough? Even when trying to lost you need to fuel your workouts. Also, are you eating a good balance of healthy fats, protein, and carbs? Have you tried calorie cycling? Eat 1 or 2 days of higher calories days, averaged with lower calorie days the rest of the week. This might help keep your body guessing and burning calories.

I think when I got to my lowest weight 2+ years ago, it took me about 6 months to lose the last 7 pounds. It was frustrating. I was always hungry, not eating enough fat, and eating ~1200 cal a day + intensive workout. My hair and nails stopped growing, and I was exhausted constantly. I remedied the fat, but the rest was just not healthy for my body. I swore I'd never eat so little again (at least when working out that intensively). I believe I had depressed my metabolism and sent my body into starvation mode. Just a cautionary tale.

And it stinks, but life is just not fair. Nope, not fair that those skinny people can eat junk stay so thin. Some of them probably work out or eat healthier than we realize...but still, not fair. Not fair my roommate can eat nothing but junk, not work out, and be a size 4. Not fair my office mate is 5'11" so she definitely gets to eat more calories than me, just to maintain her size. But... I've spent a lot of energy in my life thinking about how "not fair" it all is. I'd rather spend that energy doing something more positive.

You are doing a GREAT job!!! Focus on how much healthier you feel, how hot you look in those skinny clothes (and the leather pants ). Keep it up!!!

rant:

I feel fat. That is all.

Also, don't forget, health is not always visible on the outside... maybe a skinny person has a high matebolism, which keeps their weight down. But they could also be clogging their arteries with saturated and trans fats. They could be developing diabetes, or even suffering from malnutrition. In the end, it's just as bad for them as obesity is for us (health-wise).

Megan1982, I greatly appreciate your reply! I do need to switch up my workouts. On the weekdays, I work 10 hours a day, so I jog on at least one of my 15-minute breaks, then I usually jog when I get home. I ride my bike to work every day, nearly ten miles each way. I do so much running and biking that I have no doubt in my mind that my body is used to it So you are right - I need to kick up the intensity. I love that I can run for a long time without getting winded though I also know that means I'm not burning nearly as many calories as I did initially.

My average has been between 1,200 and 1,400 ever since I weighed around 160 and hit my first weight loss stall. So, this has been going on since the end of July. I know I really can't get much lower than 1,200 - and perhaps I DO just need to eat more, or... several tiny meals a day. My fat/carbs/protein balance could be better; I probably need more protein. I eat a lot of carbs... more than I should... they aren't always "bad" carbs but they're still carbs and I stay under 30% fat almost always. Usually I'm around 20% fat, 60% carbs and 20% protein. Not the healthiest thing, I know, I know.

My girlfriend is just like your roommate: size 4, eats all the time, and never exercises. She thinks exercise is boring torture. My sister is a size 4-6 and looks on the thin side of "average" to me, but she also never, ever exercises and eats tons of junk. She doesn't see the point of exercise: "I have a great figure already, why should I bother?"

I have another friend who just "can't gain weight." She DOES exercise... 30 minutes once or twice a week and considers it working out often! She eats anything and everything, though people assume she never eats because she's so slim. Her entire family is skinny... not weight obsessed or thin obsessed, either, just skinny! She takes full advantage of this and eats everything, dismissing whether it's healthy or not with, "yeah, well, I'm not FAT so who CARES, right? !"

That "we all have the same metabolism" theory is a LOAD OF CRAP!

misschris531: yeah, true... I read an article in a magazine once about how some people just store fat between their internal organs (how some skinny people get away with eating so much) whereas obviously fat people store it more externally.

I also read that internal fat is actually more dangerous. HAHAHA, skinny b-itches!!

Oh Night
I do have those days. A big mac and fries and a milk shake sounds soooooooooooo good. This is very strange since I have never thought a big mac and fires and a milk shake sounded good lol.

Yeah, I hardly even LIKED fast food when I was fat... just every now and then.

Now that I've sworn off everything greasy like that, I ALWAYS want BAD FOOD! I don't even like Big Macs but if you put one in front of my face right now, I would GOBBLE it down with DELIGHT!

We always want what we can't have...