Oh good, Godess, I'm glad the soup was tasty. I will put it on my list -- I just do so little cooking it will have to be a weekend project! (It's amazing my daughter survived childhood, I have so few domestic skills, especially not cooking!) I will dust off my Crockpot and make it in that, too. Maybe it will make it into the Thanksgiving lineup...we're still searching for new and different recipes. My BIL wants to make a lentil loaf. That's all we have for sure on the menu, except for turkey!

Oh girls, I forgot to tell you the terrible thing they did to the big yard next door to my building...they essentially clear cut it b/c they're subdividing the lot to put up condos (none of which I knew about it till today). They cut down at least a dozen trees, leaving a bunch of sad stumps and a mountain of sawdust. It is so sad. A bird crashed into DD's window yesterday, probably disoriented from losing its home...I wasn't home but fortunately she had the presence of mind, and compassion, to call the local animal shelter. They told her to wait and see if the bird recovered from the shock, and in fact it did and flew away. At any rate, now instead of having a little miniature forest next door, I can see from my BR window straight through to the next street, and anyone in the house on the property or in that yard can see into my BR window. Very sad, and it looks completely different. <sigh>

Ruthie-so sorry about the loss of your minature forrest. I know that is why you liked your place!

Guess what girls? I lost 2 pounds!!! I am to 184! My Nov 1st goal is 182. I think I can do it! {my "." is sometime in the next week}

~flower

Ruthie, that really is sad--it's amazing the devastation that can happen in such a short time. You'll most likely see more disoriented wildlife for a while.

Flower--that's great about losing the 2 pounds. Must be all those veggies! You are an inspiration!

I didn't succumb to stress eating before, during, or after the staff meeting and I'm so happy. A small thing but it feels like a big breakthru for me--if I did it today I can do it anytime!

Go Flower! Go Goddess! What an impressive group! So far so good for me today ... I'm cooking dinner now. TTYL.

Boy, is my body letting me know I worked out yesterday! Not as bad as it usually is after my first time back, but I feel it here and there. Like my triceps....try throwing a bowling ball for 30 frames with sore triceps! It's a good kind of sore, though, you know? Today is my day off from the weights, and I'm counting my bowling as my cardio. I'm going to do my crunches, though. Did 60 yesterday, sounds like a good number for tonight.

Flower, you go, girl!!! You're melting away in front of us!

Ruthie, sorry to hear what they've done with your green space. All in the name of money. 'Tis a shame.

Hey, did you notice we're having a blue moon next month? And that Samhain falls on the even of the full moon? This is just the recharging I've been needing.

Gotta run...need to do a bit of laundry and those crunches.

Have a great day tomorrow!

Man~ that weekend wasn't long enough! Monday came toooooo soooon!

Flower ~ you are doing soooo good. Sounds like you have found your niche! Yeah for you!!!


Goddess ~ Glad you kept your self control!

Guys! I am back on track but there are days that I really wish I could find some magic pill to make it all go away. I was watching a show on "E" the other day about Plastic surgery and Liposuction. OH my gosh I wish I had the money to suck the last 15 or 20 pounds off! It would be so much easier!!!!!! I know anything worth having is worth working for but it is like I get 5 steps ahead to fall back 6!

I am so tired, I don't feel like exercising- we had a class today on sleep disorders and I was a prime candidate for sleep studies, which I don't think my insurance pays for, but I can sleep 7 -8 hours and not feel like I have slept 15 minutes.... I can sleep 10 hours and feel like I didn't sleep at all. It just isn't normal ... I sit down to study and fall asleep and that doesn't work really well when I have 2 or 3 tests to study for and I can't get past page 1... I am not really sure what to do, I just tried a new Gyn, and I don't want to sound "drug seaking" to him and my GP is just so, Hmmmm well I don't know... what do you think? (duh he is the Doctor- he is suppose to do the thinking right?) DH is like you are such a bumm all you want to do is sleep but he just doesn't get it... I don't want to sleep this much I am just that friggin tired. This isn't like a depression tired- when I was depressed I couldn't sleep.. I would just lay there completely exhausted and unable to sleep. This is what is was like when I was pregnant.. (which I am not) it is just like my body could completely shut off at any moment.... Any suggestion? I am open for opinions!

Well I have griped enough for one day... off to hit the books!

Amy
176/146/130

Hey, Amy. How long have you been feeling this way, anyway? My advice is go to your GP and say what you think is you feel like crap and you want him to work you up. If he's still acting stupid about it, find another GP. I don't think it's something to bring to a gyn unless there are indications you need a specialist. (And don't worry about seeming drug-seeking -- they're supposed to know when someone is just after an rx, and if they can't tell the difference, get a new doctor.) I am a big supporter of patients being their own advocates; you really have to be that way these days.

OK, now I'm going to complain. I have new neighbors downstairs -- the lovely elderly woman moved, and now this couple lives down there and I swear they throw shoes at each other all night . That made me laugh just reading it. Anyways, that's what it sounds like. They are also door SLAMMERS, I mean S L A M M E R S, but I already talked with the husband about that. What are they throwing around down there? It's just not normal! They also play their TV kind of loud sometimes.

Anyways, I'm trying really hard to ignore it, but it's a shock to the system after so much quietness from downstairs. That poor old lady ... only once in a while I heard her TV really loud, but since she was older, I could forgive her that, since I thought her hearing might be bad. But these people are THROWING stuff!

But here's the real problem that's been gnawing at me all day...the secretaries in my office have been going on day after day, all day long, from the moment I get in, about anthrax and terrorism and now poisoned candy and so on and so forth and they're really driving me out of my mind. I tried telling them not to worry about things they can't do anything about, like anthrax, but now they act as though I'm the enemy. I just can't tolerate hearing about this sh*t all day long. One of these chicks is really taking an attitude with me, too, which wouldn't bother me except sometimes I'm wonder if they think I'm one of "them." It's a really difficult situation. From the beginning, I tried explaining Arab culture and Islam to them, to help them understand, and now I kind of wonder if it's backfiring on me.

Thanks for listening. I'm kind of generally irritated tonight! This too shall pass .

Oh, and Wildfire, what's a blue moon?

Amyjo, just a thought, but have you had your thyroid checked? I complained to my doctor this summer about the very same thing as you're experiencing, and she wants me to have my thyroid checked. I just have to find the energy to haul my behind to the lab for the bloodwork. I literally drag myself through each and every day, watching the clock so I can go home and rest. I'm really pushing myself to do this exercise plan, hoping it will result in more energy. I really do need to go get my bloodwork done.

Wildfire, we were posting simultaneously ... I am hypothyroid (profoundly hypothyroid) and believe me, there's no exercise in the world that will give you energy when you're not taking medication. It's just not physically possible. Anyways, that's a good thought, and Amy should definitely see her doc.

Oh, Ruthie....boy can I relate to noisy neighbors below! That's why I moved the last time. Two young guys with a stereo that filled (and I mean filled!) their living room, played so loud the dishes in my cupboards once bounced right out and smashed all over the floor. Landlord said, it's not so bad....so I said, here's my notice. It is completely frustrating and stressful to have to put up with someone else's noise. We listen to music with headphones in my household, and I won't even vacuum on the weekend until after noon.

As for the goings on in your office, I don't know what to tell you, other than I'd like to slap that chick upside her head for taking an attitude with you. I've had to distance myself from the discussions in our lunch room several times because people are obsessed about the anthrax thing. Yes, it's horrible and serious and something we should all be concerned about, but spending every waking moment worried about it doesn't do any good. Really, what we can as individuals do to control it? We just have to have our wits about us and use caution if something seems out of the ordinary. I don't know a lot about the Arab culture, as I really don't have anyone close in real life that I could talk about it with, but I would like to know more. I think every culture has something to give to the world, and if more people could see that we'd all get along better.

Hubby's hanging out over my shoulder, so I'll continue this tomorrow.

I am just sitting on the computer tonight... I have had two thyroid screens in the past like 5 years the last one in the summer of 99 but I won't rule that out by any means. I need to get a physical, it has been a few years anyway.

Ruthie ~ The sleepiness/Tiredness... I think it has been going on forever... It was really worse when I was pregnant and I attributed it to being pregnant but I have always been able to sleep 10 hours at a stretch and not bat and eye.. and only get up because I had to.. I feel like I could sleep at just about any place at any time, if I get into calm mode I can crash... doesn't matter where I am or what I am doing.

I really wouldn't of thought about a sleep disorder until it was brought up in class today. I swear I am not one of those people who just thinks because someone says it I have it.... I got online tonight and took two online tests for sleep disorders and I passed both of them with flying colors (and I don't mean the good way) It is weird I hadn't really thought about it as a problem until today, even though my husband has been giving me a hardtime about it since forever. I will be reading a really good book and be really interested in it and not sleepy at all and fall asleep... or be playing a game (like Everquest) and realize I walked halfway across a country(zone) while I was asleep with my head on my desk, falling asleep while driving ... reading outloud to my daughter and fall asleep while in mid sentence. All of this just seemed normal to me, until today- Being 30 years old and still able to sleep for 12 hours straight isn't too normal (and wanting to sleep 12 hours straight because I feel like crap when I am awake... I don't know I think I will make an appointment with someone... just to feel them out.

Ruthie ~ I am sorry about your trees.. it annoys me when that happens, it seems so unnecessary....
There is sooo much paranoia? going on right now it isn't funny and in all honesty the lay people aren't the ones being targeted so why don't people just get a clue? Do they not realize that these people are still just trying to make a point that they can reach, the important aspects of daily life... the press, the news, and the government? They may eventually try to target the civilians again but it is going to be with something different than anthrax (IMO)... I don't know what to tell you to do about the anthrax situation but I do know that there are some civil liberties they could be infringing on... if they make you feel too uncomfortable then I would talk to your direct supervisor and if he/she doesn't do something about it... then you may have a way to pay the rest of your way through grad school ... You should be able to go to work do your job and go home... you shouldn't have to worry about you co-workers thinking your a terrorist... People are still so closed minded!!!!!

Wildfire ~ isn't a Blue Moon when you have two full moons in a month? or something like that?

Thanks for your imput guys I think I am going to make a Dr's Appointment. (Especially since our family deductible has been met for the year and I just have to pay the minimum on everything ) hehe!!!!

Hugs,
Amy
176/146/130

Ruthie, I can relate to your co-worker problems. I feel the same way about the gossipers that I work with. I think that they go a little paranoid because I don't just join in and I actually do some work! Humans are such pack animals and have such a 'for us or against us' attitude. Don't they realize that talking all the time about fearful things can't be good for morale, etc.?

Yes, Witchy Ones--it's so cool that the full moon is happening Samhain night! At the staff meeting yesterday, I told everybody that if it was okay I wanted to take next Wednesday off. And they said 'oh Halloween?' And I said, 'yeah, religious holiday and all that!' Didn't miss a beat!!!

Thanks for your supportive responses, guys. I asked my boss today if it was all right for me to work with my door shut and he said, it's your door, do what you want! So that's what I've been doing, and oh what a difference. So much negative energy from all those discussions -- they feed off each other. I look out the window at the turning leaves in all their glory and thank God for another beautiful day in my life. I did get some satisfaction, though ... one of the stories going around yesterday was that a "middle Eastern looking" guy bought thousands of dollars worth of candy at a local wholesale outlet. This prompted people all over northern NJ to freak out and cancel trick or treating right and left. I tried to tell the girls in my office that I KNOW from EXPERIENCE in my own life (when XDH and I owned a grocery store) that it's not unusual to buy that much candy at once right before Halloween, and it's not unusual for "middle Eastern looking" people to do so b/c they own so many grocery stores!! They weren't having it, though -- they just wanted to live in their little conspiracy-theory world. Today the NY Times printed an article saying the FBI investigated, cleared it, and said it was perfectly normal. I e-mailed the article to the secretaries' supervisor and she passed it around for distribution. Ha! In your face! Amy, believe me, it has occurred to me that they're making my workplace kind of a hostile environment, but right now I'd rather just shut them out than take action against them. No one's said anything right out, so I probably wouldn't have a case anyway. They know I'm pissed, which is just making them all the more gossipy.

About the neighbors...I was able to see thru their LR windows that they have a floor to ceiling bookcase, so I wonder if that shoe-throwing noise was them putting books away. So hopefully it will stop soon.

I am baking a whole mess of veggies for dinner -- sweet potato, potato, and eggplant. I don't know what else to have with it, but I've already had 14 points today so I'd better chill. I can't find my WW book, but I'm guessing sweet potatoes are 3 points? I'll figure it out later.

Aren't we all chatty today? I love it!

Ruthie-so sorry you have to deal with all the negativity at work. It really isn't fair. Good for you shutting the door.

Amy-I agree, go see the doc. How is your iron level? If this started when you were pregnant, could it be as simple as being anemic???

Wildfire-I am starting the weights tonight! We are suppose to have house guests. I cleaned and cleaned and the closer it got, the less I wanted them here. The father and son are coming in to work 2 conventions. On Sunday night I asked the Goddess to delay their arrival. My home wasn't ready. I got a phone call a few hours later saying they had broken down 8 hours prior and wouldn't be in til today. Well, Chris has to work til 9-10ish tonight. They are his friends. (I don't like them) I am hoping the hotel room reservations are set. He is suppose to start tomorrow and the people put him up in a hotel. So I am hoping my desires come true. Why did I agree to it? Well, sometimes for the sake of a relationship, you must deside what battles are worth fighting. I thought this is something I could live with. I guess it wouldn't kill me but I won't be happy. We will have to be quiet while they sleep ect... Convention work is wierd hours. Yuck! So, I hope I have the house to myself, if not I do them in my bedroom! ~flower

Well, my company got here. I guess my wish is now, please be gone by tomorrow! They haven't been too bad. The boys love having them here. They love helping building bikes and ramps and video games.... Not what I like at all! I hope I will survive. I had to wait till 9pm for my walk cause I do not allow anyone in my home unattended any more. Too many things gone, when I wasn't looking. It is so sad that I trust noone anymore.