Hello all,

Only a short note as I've been awake since 3.....luckily, reruns of the Nanny were on and it was mindless and even funny to make my early morning bearable.

Found out last Friday that surgery is not an option. Tomorrow we meet with "our team" to finalize schedule for radiation and chemo.

Emotional weekend for all. My family has suprised me in many ways; my mother especially has been wonderful.

I am sorting thru things to turn this office I sit in now to a bedroom again; DD has promised to appear soon....

I also anticpate a bed on the first level of the house, am hoping to have it in view of the windows, I will add arrange bird feeders for fun.

I had two very clear dreams last night----one, I was riding a bicycle on the busy interstate and last a tire.....
second, I was driving again on a busy interstate and heard a "PING" sound......and realized I couldn't steer anymore.... I thought quickly enough to put on the hazard lights and was able to strong arm the car to the shoulder but it was by enormous force of will.....

Doesnt take a Royal rocket scientest to figure that one out does it?


I reread the lastest posts and know you are still relieved you spoke your mind Kat. We have similiar issues in our family--- some of them bleed over into how certain family members are treated. Like you, shortly, my 'flag" will be very clear for all to see. And believe it or not, its DH who has said to me, "I believe that family is important and family will get us through this".....
And he means MY family.
My point is, I am almost looking forward to not being the diplomat, it already feels very freeing. How much time was wasted!! But at least, Kat, we know we weren't too late!!

WSW-- You continue to amaze me with your tally! Yahoo on so many sizes down! YOU are the QUEEN!!!

Anagram-- you look marvelous!!

Wood Nymph--PLEASE recommend your best and favorite Imagery CD people.

Eydie- Yes, hugs are welcome!! I do remember your scare. Hard to believe 7 yrs has gone by!!

Silver- How are you? How is life treating you??


I'm really off my friends. Thanks for listening.


Oh and by the way..... DH cannot tolerate bleach or lysol smells..... Can anyone recommend a scent free germ killer other than rubbing alcohol???
(or something better?) I expect to be knee deep in germ killing soon....

Thanks again.

Honestly, just this little post made a difference.

Hi WoodNymph.....

I think one of our systems will let us download and burn our own CD's.

We do have access to the library at the hospital, there was one we borrowed by Bernie Siegel but I'm not sure if its guided imagery.

DH likes Bernie Siegel because we have a Yale connection and when DMIL was sick, Dr. Bernie Siegel, signed a book for her.


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We're only at the beginning of this journey and Dh is already so weary of it mentally. I know he will recharge but.......
I need to do an Academy Award winning performance tomorrow, going back in and sitting again with the doctor who was sneering at me......

I'm thinking when he walks in, I will open my purse and pull out a roll of duct tape.... If he asks me who it's for, I'll say "We'll see how the meeting goes"....
Or perhaps, just do the Royal thing and just smile.

I feel like the mother from Terminator..... just wish I looked like her and could carry her gun in there with me tomorrow.

Hello all.....

Well,
sometimes it's good to be crammed in a doctor's examining room with 3 doctors and 2 nurses......

Evidently, something was said Friday's appt was like meeting a whole new man. AND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CHEMO STARTS ON WED!!!!!

Is this ironic that I cheering that DH is starting chemo.... but yes, this is a good thing. All the cancer medical professionals we knew from home kept saying "Should be starting treatment, sooner the better"
And now we are only a few days away, radiation will probably begin week after.... otherwise, well, they know what happens when I see things fall apart and are delayed.

In addition, this doctor's Nurse Practioner, sat with us for a good 20 minutes, explaining many things and she is fabulous. Too bad she wasnt running last weeks meeting.

Now that we had a schedule, I had something to tell DM( mom), who is coming to stay with us as along as we need her.
She wanted to drive so she'd have her car but I was not comfortable considering she lives in Fl.
BUT, as I was discussing my concerns online, a Dsister volunteered to fly down and ride back north. What a wonderful show of support and what a weight off my mind!!

Then, my brother contacted me today to tell me specifically that a woman he is dating works for Novartis (sp?), a drug manufacuter and there is a drug in its 12 trial specifically developed for non small cell lung cancer.... If I understood my brother, this drug is administered the same time the chemo is and it prohibits the cancer from reproducing while its being killed.

so, things are better!!
Much better!
And it's wonderful how so many people are showing so much support.
And it's so lovely how folks seem so glad to do it.

And I am so grateful.

To you also!

Hello all,

Wood Nymph, could it be time to change out that scale???

Remember what the Empress always says in these situations!
"It's only Temporary!!".....

Try not to let those numbers take over, I know that's so much easier said than done.....
I know the list of things that add a couple pounds or four or five ......especially whatever is in the sugar free hot chocolate --- zoom!
must be extra salt under the flavor that pushes that BLOAT button.......

Thanks for refreshing my memory about your sister, its so, so true, the doctors only give their best guess....the rest is up to us.........

We are begining to see signs of fall definitely replacing summer. More geese in the sky than on the ground, more comfortable, cooler days.....
I read that the Northeast foliage will be record breaking this year due to our wet, wet spring. DH loves the foliage, especially in New England....
I am hoping we have an opportunity to go but it we'll see..... Perhaps the leaves will be more brillant here this year ...............

Today's thought of the day said :

"Action is worry's worst enemy"........

I can tell from that knot in my stomach I need to go get busy..... Right this minute, it's supper......
Still deep cleaning in preparation for DMom and etc.............

I swear, my packrat days are gone!!!

(Except for what I can use for gifts and to trade or to sell!)

I saw your link on the imagery cd's, I will try and explore that soon, my husband found on at the Cancer Center's library by Bellruth ...... forgot the last name.....


Hugs to all!

Hello all!

Makes sense Wood Nymph, a set schedule works better for so many people, I know weekends DH often forgets to take meds because the routine is interrupted....

Another friend of mine has realized that time weighs heavy on her hands now that she's been working from home the past few months.... She finds that workng in her pajamas is not anywhere near as much fun as advertised.

Personally, I don't know how I would be.... certainly, having my own privacy, with music, etc would be a wonderful but I wonder if I would miss the interaction too.....

But your new office sounds exciting Wood Nymph... sounds like it's a solution in the making.... and yes, maybe just those steps in your commute will reap huge benefits....

Day 2 after chemo, DH awoke ok but is now wondering if he is seeing some side affects.... of course, we are also wondering if his spicy tofu lunch yesterday is really the culprit. I told hm he is very brave to have spicy tofu the day after his first chemo treatment!!

********************


Thought of the day:

"The only disability is a bad attiude."
Scott Hamilton, Olympic figure skater

Question of the day:

"How many people do you know personally who have had cancer?"


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Yes, Wood Nymph, lets make this a good one!