Well, I guess my DS didn't forget Mother's Day! He called, he's coming home for the weekend and he said, "so Sunday is Mother's Day, right? Well, I got you something."!!!

My fifth day in the main office, thankfully underpopulated on Friday, on a quiet, foggy morning. I have to lead an interview, so I'm pinstriped and groomed. There's the little folder on my desk containing the candidate's resume and the call-in numbers, as this will be a conference call and a panel interview, with four people questioning the candidate. The weird thing is, because of the reorg, this person now won't be reporting me, but I still have to continue the process, because the handoff isn't yet official, not till May 15th.

Just a weird, weird week.

Weigh in: 138.3. I should be happy, but I'm not. This is not an earned, worked-for weight, this is the byproduct of extreme, prolonged stress and having just an hour or two at night after eating dinner before I put myself to bed.


Today's Meals:

Breakfast: Cranberry applesauce muffin; turkey bacon, broccoli & mushroom egg bake; cherries with yogurt
Snack: Two fresh apricots, one bruised and mushy
Lunch: Arugula salad with bell peppers, black-eyed peas, chunks of smoked turkey, some sunflower seeds
Snack: The smaller bag of Bare Fruit Granny Smith apple chips
Dinner: Saffron chicken on steamed asparagus
Dessert: Quest Cookies n' Cream bar

Exercise for today:

Physical therapy: 12 minutes Cybex elliptical, slight hills; leg press & calf presses alternating, 4x12 each; quad raises and hamstring curls, 4x12 each; abductor/adductor, 4x12 each; walk on treadmill for 8 minutes.

Saef, I'm ready for things to calm down for you at work. Blech, all that corporate maneuvering is def not the stuff dreams are made of.

Michelle, yes, I'm a nurse in a high school. Luckiest job ever! It's sometimes crazy and stressful but most of the time I can sit back and go "wow, how did I land this?"

And now, I'm going to change my location on my siggie..., since there aren't many of us in our community and I don't want to get outed...

Today is "official" weigh day, and I'm below redline. Whew. I'm glad I can change my siggie back. I'm up 1.5 from yesterday. That always happens on movie nights with DS because I eat my weight in sweet and salty popcorn.

I'm hoping to be super volumetric over the weekend and see if I can prevent or minimize that Monday weight spike. I haven't really gained or lost since I started back here a month ago. Which is great, since this is the maintainers forum...but I'd like to nip a bit off if I can do it without undue discomfort.

No! You deserve better than that. Throw it away and I'll run out and get you a better one.

That's the thing about living in the northern parts of the Americas - not great fruit most of the time. I still remember the orange I ate while in Peru - like no other I've had in my life. And the fresh dates and pomegranate in Morocco. SIGH.

Dagmar

Woke up just past midnight on Saturday morning, sweaty and not sure if I was sick or anxious. But I was ravenously hungry, that much was clear. So I went into the kitchen and ate some cherries, took a Melatonin and put myself to bed.

Then up at 5:30 AM as usual on a weekend. I find myself edgy, as if I have to go into work, and at a loss, because I don't have to go into work. This weekend will all be about calming the f$#@* down. And trying to do that without eating something.

Weigh in: 137.6.

Today's Meals:

Breakfast: Cranberry applesauce muffin; turkey bacon, broccoli & mushroom egg bake; cantaloupe slices with yogurt
Lunch: Spring mix salad with roasted vegetables, half an avocado, toasted pecans, goat cheese and craisins
Snack: MacIntosh apple, bruised but delicious
Dinner: Baked cod with salsa, frozen mixed veggies
Dessert: Mixed Berry Bliss Quest Bar


Exercise:

20 minutes Cybex arc trainer, resistance at eight, hill intervals; Workout A of Phase 2 of Strong Curves; then Pilates mat class.

That's great your son is coming home to celebrate, Allison.

Hope you're okay, Saef. Hope the edginess abates as well.

I weighed in at 124.8; my redline is 125, so just a hair under. Hoping to not spike too much over the weekend.

Back to the vet this morning with Ellie who still has diarrhea. She feels great otherwise. I'm mad at the old vet. Brought in a sample yesterday and they just said it was negative. Not really helpful when a puppy has had diarrhea for a week. It's 7:00 and she's already gone 4 times! Hoping the new vet puts her on something that works quickly! She's due for shots and I want to get her microchipped but not sure they'll be able to do it today.

((((Saef)))) Best wishes for a grounding, relaxing weekend.

I have had weird nights like that. Once I was terrified it was cardiac. I decided my risk was very low and that the pattern was more related to anxiety, as it came on in a pattern with each time I nearly drifted off. For me it seems to happen hormonally, around the full moon.

I'm in for a fun and active day. Need to plan food or it will get away from me.

B-Muffins (inspired by Saef, going to try my hand at carrot/applesauce muffins)
S-cheese and fruit
L-salad with fish
S-fruit and egg white
D-Stir fry-that illusive stir fry that I never seem to make!
Ds-ice cream sandwich.

I'm planning to go out dancing at the local salsa place tonight with friends. Should be fun, but I don't want to be up too late. Hope I can get through without knee pain, the last time I went I was doing too many turns on my L foot and kind of twisted it. I'm 37, too young for knee issues, dang it! Knee health is one of my main motivators for wanting to drop more wt. Along with vanity and ease of finding clothes that fit well.

Good luck with the new vet, Michelle. Hope they can get Ellie regulated.

Hey Georgette, did you dance like Shakira? Were your hips truthful? Did you right-and-left it? Also, best of luck with your muffin recipe. Mine is one cup of flour and a cup and a half of rolled oats, plus whatever else I throw in there: Ground flax seeds, chia seeds, ground-up walnuts or pecans. The wet stuff is mashed bananas, or applesauce, or canned pumpkin.

No weigh-in, again because I am trying not to obsess. Also because three different women spoke to me at the gym and told me how good I looked. (I disagree. I want my muscle back.) One who didn't know about my accident, poor thing, because she spends the winter in Italy, said: "You look like you've lost weight. Was it hard?"

Today's Meals:

Breakfast: Cranberry applesauce muffin; turkey bacon, broccoli & mushroom egg bake; blueberries with cinnamon and higher-fat yogurt than I'm used to, the 2%, since Cabot Lowfat Greek was on sale. Their yogurt tastes like cheese.
Lunch: Spring mix salad with roasted vegetables, half an avocado, toasted pecans, goat cheese and Craisins
Dinner: Chicken leg quarter, cabbage and carrots over four red-jacket potatoes. I feel really full.
Dessert: White chocolate raspberry Quest bar

Exercise:

20 minutes recumbent bike, not one that I like the best, resistance at ten, random hills; Workout B of Phase 2 of Strong Curves.
__________________

Saef, a question: do you think you're actually eating less the last few weeks, to cause the speeded-up weight loss, or do you attribute it solely to anxiety/stress increasing your metabolism somehow? And, if you are eating less (which seems more logical), can you judge the difference in portion size compared to previous? I am asking because your food logs look virtually identical from week to week, so it can't be that the composition of your meals has changed, but you don't log quantity.

After a terrible overeating evening last Tuesday, I have been much more in control through the rest of the week and this weekend. Not that it matters- I am hovering just a smidgen below 130, feeling that the yo-yo string of my life has me in its grip.

Dagmar- wow, Peru and Morocco? Very cool. What other exotic locales lie in your past?

Andrea Peru and Morocco were vacations, back when I had money to travel a bit. Now I have pets.

Dagmar

Andrea, I think that I eat marginally less and that I move around more, trying to burn off excess adrenalin, when I am under extreme stress. I seem to have several settings: When I'm anxious, I eat more than usual, but when I get into a state of extreme distress, the opposite happens and I eat much less. I am not enough of a scientist to weigh & measure; or rather, I am wary of the re-emergence of my eating disorder. Because frankly, I know that's what's going on here. I am restricting because that's what I can control, when my life seems out of my control otherwise -- I am just a head count or a resource to be moved around in the org chart by upper management, without much regard for my feelings.

Weigh in: 139.1, up over a pound over the weekend from Friday morning's weight. The yogurt and potatoes? Slight relaxation?

Today's Meals:

Breakfast: Cranberry applesauce muffin; turkey bacon, broccoli & spinach egg bake; blueberries with cinnamon with 2% yogurt
Snack: Forelle pear, a little bit too firm
Lunch: Spring mix and arugula salad, roasted vegetables, half an avocado, walnuts & pistachios, goat cheese
Snack: Two fresh apricots, the less said, the better
Dinner: Chicken leg quarter with cabbage, carrots and leftover broccoli
Dessert: Chocolate chip cookie dough Quest bar, sinfully good

Exercise:

At the gym: 45 minute spin class, speeding it up a bit more, and changing the resistance a few times, now that I don't think I'll break and that I found, after the last class, just some muscle soreness in my quads, which is a good thing, as my left quad is visibly smaller than the right.

Physical therapy: 12 minutes Cybex elliptical; 1x12 bodyweight squats, then 4x20, first goblet squats with 15 lbs, then squats holding two dumbbells at right angles; 4x12 single leg alternating curls, 4x12 single leg alternating raises; 4x12 abductors/adductors each

My hips didn't lie, but the salsa venue did. They closed early, so we ended up at a night club type place instead, dancing to hip hop. Lots of Snoop Dogg. Not what I was hoping for, but I did become the target of one lonely 40 y.o.'s attention. It was a much younger crowd, so his options were slim...(I'm 37 and don't pass for under 30 anymore, even in low lighting... ) I showed him my wedding ring when he started to massage my thighs...

My muffins came out AWESOME. I did more oats than flour, and put in banana, some olive oil (love that flavor in quick breads) and chopped apples and some brown sugar. Not nearly as much oil and sugar as a recipe would call for, but not completely without either. DH thought they were the best muffins I had ever made.

Back into the CT office, feeling wary and vulnerable, just hoping for nothing painful or jarring to happen today. I woke up just after midnight last night & did not sleep well till by 4 AM wake-up, despite two melatonin tablets.

Weigh in: 138.8, so little difference from yesterday that I may as well have skipped the weigh-in entirely

Today's Meals:

Breakfast: Cranberry applesauce muffin; turkey bacon, broccoli & spinach egg bake; strawberries with 2% yogurt
Snack: MacIntosh apple, wholly satisfactory
Lunch: Spring mix salad with tuna, roasted veggies, olives, some tiny mozzarella balls
Snack: Three guavas, delicious, the little yellow ones
Dinner: Chicken leg quarter, cabbage & carrots
Dessert: Bare Fruit cinnamon apple chips, the larger bag

Exercise:

At the gym: 20 minutes Cybex arc trainer, hill intervals, upped the resistance to nine; then Workout C of Strong Curves Beginners Program, Phase 2. Pouring sweat due to high humidity and the gym running overhead fans but not switching on the air-conditioning yet.