Hi Everyone,

I'm from the 300+ Chat Thread and The Worldly's Chat thread and I thought I would join this one too. On medications I was able to get down to 281 so I know it is possible but is it more difficult losing weight on meds then losing weight without being on anything. Anyway here's a back story about myself...

At my highest I was 310, Since I started my weight loss journey for the

2nd time my lowest was 281, Last time I weighed myself I

was 290. At my last doctor's appointment my doctor said Im very close

to getting diabetes and I dont want to get diabetes so Im trying to do

everything I can to keep that from happening. I stayed at 120 although

high school cause of physical education class, I wish you could have

physical education class all through life. I started gaining weight after

high school cause I didnt have physical education class anymore and I

didnt grow up doing sports so I couldnt fall back on sports to stay fit

after high school so I started gaining weight, I graduated high school in

May of 03 and ever since then my weight has gone up but Im

determined to not only get into the 270's but to get my weight under

control once and for all. Thanks for taking the time to read about my

Weight Loss Journey. By the way by the end of my weight loss journey I

want to be at 150 pounds.

Terra1984: to the group! So happy you posted! Thank you for sharing about your weight loss journey. I also lost 35+ pounds about 4 years back on meds, so I agree it is possible. It is just so much harder. Now, recently, I found out that I am Insulin Resistant and hypothyroid..... and older..... which makes weight loss even MORE difficult. The important thing, though, is that we NEVER GIVE UP on ourselves!!! I, like you, want to avoid Type II Diabetes, which is a very serious threat for those of us who are obese (hate the word, but it is true). I need to really remember that when I am tempted with unhealthy foods or resisting exercise. Best of luck to you in your weight loss journey!!! YOU CAN DO THIS!!! We will be cheering you on all the way!!!

Fi: What a scare for you with Oscar bolting out the front door!!! I am so happy that it had a good ending and that he is okay. Glad you are okay from your tackle, too! And, as for Nenu biting her stitches out, I absolutely HATE those Elizabethan collars!!! They are so inconvenient, but sometimes necessary. I hope her incision heals quickly so she can get that collar off ASAP! Those little kitties are sure keeping you hoppin'!!! Great to hear that you and Grace had another wonderful Friday together! You are both blessed to have each other!!!

Hello, I have not been online much lately. My internet has been iffy lately. I missed you all.

Jennifer comes home on Tuesday for Christmas vacation. I have to go get her, it'll take 4 hours both ways. I am always tired when I get home.

I see new faces in the thread, how wonderful!!!!!!!

Thats about it for now. I will try to come back tomorrow and speak to all of you individually.

I'm deeply involved in a big project right now: making my first collage on one of the fiberboard (aka masonite) backings that Bob made for me. It's 11" x 17"—instead of my usual 6" x 9" or 8 1/2" x 11"—so there's a whole lot more to do in terms of cutting out the pieces, planning the composition, creating layers, and so on. I've given myself three days to make it, and today is Day Two. Work, work, work! But of course it's fun work. =smile= I'll give y'all a hint about it: the title is "fur-people day at the water gallery." (I know that makes no sense without the picture.) Fur is challenging to cut out!

I'm having a string of mostly 0/0/0 days—yay!! When I drift down into -1 or get all jittery in +1, I now have Qigong techniques for goin' right back to 0. So life is good.

Lisa: It is so good to hear from you!!! Thanks for checking in! Wow, Jennifer comes home Tuesday for Christmas break? That is great! Did you enjoy your Thanksgiving time with her? I hope school is going well and that your headaches/migraines have stayed away! Keep in touch whenever possible!

Fi: Sounds like you have your "work" cut out for you with your big collage project (no pun intended)! Enjoy the process! Great to hear that you have had a string of 0/0/0 days and that your Qigong techniques are really helping to keep your mood in check. Thanks for checking in!

How is everyone else?!?!?!?!?

Kathleen, I did enjoy my time with Jennifer, over Thanksgiving. We had a great time. We actually cooked, if you can believe it. I made a Turkey breast.
School starts up again in January, I am taking 2 classes. Math and a computer class.
My migraines have pretty much gone away. yay!!!!


Holly, I am so sorry I missed your birthday.


You all will pretty much have to ask me questions. I can't think of anything to write about. I am pretty down and have been for a while now. I feel like I own every Tom, Dick and Harry money. It's awful. I may not be able to go to school after spring semester, I owe school money because I dropped classes. It is a lot of money too. I am so sad.

The nurse practitioner has upped my Abilify and my Lamictal. I hope it helps so that I can come up with a solution to my money problems.

I need a hug so badly.

Lisa: Sorry to hear that you are still feeling really down. I'd give you a big hug in person if I could, but cyberspace hugs will have to do! So sorry you are in such financial difficulty, too. That stinks! Makes everything more stressful. YAY on the migraines ceasing!!! Hang in there! Hope the adjustments in your meds help. Still keeping you in my prayers!

Hi everyone. Hope all is well. Sorry I have been absent lately! I have been busy like I have never been busy before. Well, almost... The last four to five days have been absolutely INSANE. But they're over now!

Working a double at work today. I ran out of gas on the way to work, but I have been immensely blessed by good friends with gas cans who are awake at 6:45am to come rescue me. I was 30 minutes late to work but everyone was so nice about it and it didn't end up really mattering. Nothing is happening at the crisis unit that early in the morning anyway!

In less than two weeks I get to go home for Christmas and I am excited about that too. I am going to a wedding the night before I leave for home, and that should be fun. AND,........ MY BEST FRIEND IS COMING INTO TOWN ON SATURDAY!!!! She moved to Colorado in May and I have only seen her once since then, and going from seeing her daily for four years to seeing her once in six months has been so hard! But we talk nearly every day and that helps. I am so very excited for her to come.

I am seeing an ob/gyn today to discuss my PCOS and potentially going on birth control. I am excited. I never get a period now so the idea of having one every month might be nice.

Ok, that's all for now!

AmyLynne: So happy to see a post from you!!! Glad to hear that your days of insane busyness are over..... at least for now. Boo on running out of gas, but HOORAY for friends to your rescue! A wedding, home for Christmas, and your best friend coming for a visit all sound wonderful! Enjoy every minute! Good luck at the OB/GYN and with your PCOS. You crack me up about being excited about maybe having a period! Everyone else HATES them!!! I guess it all depends on your perspective!

Hello! first, belated b-day wishes to our beloved Kathleen I'm so sorry I missed your birthday on the 4th. I hope it was nice! and I am also so hopeful and exited about your great meeting with the endocrineologist ( I know I did not spell that right) and hopeful about better results for you now!

Fi, best wishes on your latest project! hope it is FUN to do and oh my gosh at having to LEAP to get the errant kitty, and how great that you did not injure yourself doing that!

Lisa - a whole bucketful of hugs for you poor thing I am so sorry that right now money is such a rotten issue for you, that sux You are usually very positive so it is not kewl to have you sad.

Hey do not be sad about missing my b-day, they are not that big a deal anymore they are awesome when you're a kid and there is the anticipation about a birthday party with a frosted cake and presents...now I am just glad if it's a day that I don't have to vacuum

Amy, it is so good to hear you sounding so positive! YOu make a 'not fun event' of running out of gas sound so wonderful because it showed what great friends you have to rescue you! and glad it wasn't an issue being late for work. I also think it's wonderful that you are looking forward to periods I hope they are great for you my friend!

we are getting pounded by snow this evening, and it is supposed to keep going on through tomorrow. I wouldn't ordinarily care, as I have the next two days off, but I do have the final dental visit tomorrow to cement on my 2 permanent crowns and I just wanna get that done!

Have been making CHristmas cookies, and unfortunately eating them too..it just happens!

Been keeping up with working out, I am feeling my biceps and abs again and that is a good thing. I also need to work out for balance...I was on the back porch last night, and just not paying attention, and fell backwards into a bunch of clutter thank goodness that pedestal stand fan broke my fall and I broke the fan (again with the )

Jeez, my muse is so bossy! I've worked on this big collage until my eyes were so tired, they were craving darkness and letting me know about it in no uncertain terms. But today, right on schedule, I finished it. =whew= I can't show it to y'all until Bob finishes a big file transfer from his old, dying computer to his new one, because I need his fancy scanner for this one—not my ancient, barely functional Canon. So it will be a few hours before I can upload it. But it's 100% done. I can actually not do art tonight. =laugh=

I think this newly bossy muse business has something to do with my Qigong. Not only is it warding off depression and changing my body, it's giving me a HUGE amount of energy. Now I just gotta figure out how to use that energy for something other than art (and tackling runaway kittens), like getting my weight loss project back in gear. My weight chart on the fridge looks weird with a long horizontal line going across it. I want that line to turn downward again!

I'm unsure about what happens next, now that I've proven to myself that I can sustain focus and concentration long enough to venture making bigger pieces. I'm also unsure about how I will nudge myself into exercising more and eating less. But I feel good, really good, tonight. I'm so grateful for the positive changes in my life over the past 14 months or so: finding 3 Fat Chicks, giving up sugar, giving up aspartame, getting into the 200s, accomplishing the BERP, hanging out with you wonderful people, being a happy mentor to my great niece Grace, getting two dynamite kittens with lots of personality, getting new tools for fighting depression & mania, being more present in my body, having more energy & better balance...the list goes on & on. =big smile=

I hope some of my tidings of comfort and joy are spilling out some blessings to you—the fabulous person who is reading these words. If I could bottle it, I'd share it with you immediately. Thank you for being out there! May the Goddess support you, sustain you, and bring you many shining moments this month!

What a beautiful uplifting post from Fi!

We got at least 8" of HEAVY wet snow, then at some point there was rain, then cold made that freeze, then a little more snow; DH and I are so lucky to have a strong son live here to do most of the shoveling, I could and would but he gets out there and does most of it first, yay

The drive home last night was okay; I was in a long line of cars and no one wanted to go over 35 mph so that was fine with me. Kinda squirrelly on the final big hill, very glad I have AWD and very good (very expensive) snow tires.

this morning I have that dental appt. to get these 2 crowns cemented into my head

hope everyone has a good day!! I just got my 3 month supply of Wellbutrin in the mail from cananda drug, that's a good feeling for me.

Thank you all for responding to my posts. I really do appreciate it.

I am still down and quiet but I am not thinking of hurting myself, I am just quiet. I have so much going on here. If I had the money, I would think about just filing for bankruptcy to help out a bit. I wouldn't even begin to know how to come up with the money. Anyway...

Jennifer is home for Christmas holiday, it is so nice to have her here with me. I love me this kid, although, she is not a kid anymore.

amylynne, what a wonderful post from you. I am so happy for all the good things that are happening in your life right now.

Fi, give those kittens lots of hugs from me.

Holly, I know birthdays aren't any big deal when we age but it's still nice to acknowledged on your day.

Kathleen, did I miss your birthday too?


Much love to you all.

Today, I listened to an emotional eating audio by Marna Thall, owner of thinwithin.com and much of what she said hit home with me. I have done other trainings by her, which have all been free, and they have been helpful. Well, at the end of this audio, she said that she was offering free coaching for the next couple weeks. Sooooooo.............. I emailed her to sign up! I was so afraid to do it, but I so want to break through my barriers to weight loss (emotional and physical). She will be calling me on Friday at noon for a 1/2 hour coaching session. YIKES!!! I am so nervous but also excited to MOVE FORWARD in this process. I have also been reading an old book (from 2003) that I've had stored away, called The Pathway: Follow the Road to Health and Happiness, by Laurel Mellin. In my reading (prior to the audio training session today), I realized once again that I have done a ton of THINKING about my personal issues and even a lot of FEELING about them, but I really try to AVOID the FEELING part much of the time. And I NEED to FEEL it (even more) to HEAL it!!! It is an ONGOING PROCESS which will probably be lifelong for me to some extent (due to the depth of my emotional wounding). I need to remember that..... and somehow I'd forgotten it recently. Anyway, I feel ready to FACE THE FEELINGS again, even though it scares me half to death to do it. I am happy about these recent realizations and my readiness to take my healing a step further. I feel as though I am on the verge of a breakthrough, which is exciting!!! I have worked with professional counselors for over 15 years now, but I haven't done a lot of specific counseling for overeating and body/weight issues. I am hoping and praying that this coaching call and the book I am reading (mentioned above) will help lead me in the right direction.

Holly: Thank you for the belated birthday wishes!!! You are so sweet! I hope you made it out through the snow to get your permanent crowns seated today!!! I hate the temporary ones and all of the trips back and forth to the dentist when they break or fall out. What a hassle! I know you will be relieved to finally have the real crowns in! YAY for the arrival of 3 months worth of Wellbutrin!!! Stay warm and safe with all of that snow!!! I guess we have to finally admit that WINTER is here!

Fi: HOORAY for finishing your big collage right on schedule! Can't wait to see it! It is wonderful to hear you sounding so upbeat! I am so happy that you have Qigong in your life. What a blessing it seems to be on many fronts. You SHOULD feel very satisfied and proud of all that you have accomplished in the past 14 months! The things you listed are no small feats, either! Thanks for sharing your POSITIVE ENERGY with all of us!

Lisa: So relieved to hear that, although you still feel very down, you aren't thinking of hurting yourself. I am thankful for THAT! Glad that Jennifer is there with you for awhile. Enjoy every moment of your time together!!! Don't worry for a second about missing my b-day! It was the 4th and I had a wonderful day, except that my daughter has been home sick the past week and a half. She has a bad sinus infection (on antibiotic), a UTI (and another antibiotic), and a skin infection (a topical antibiotic). Poor thing. She is absolutely MISERABLE. She has been to the pediatrician twice and they want to see her again, but I am done with them. I might take her to Urgent Care if she is home again (sick) tomorrow. I just want some relief for her symptoms (terrible congestion and bad cough). She said that her symptoms aren't any better than when she first started feeling sick (the Saturday after Thanksgiving). She is supposed to have semester finals next week, so I need her healthy and back at school! Most of all, I just want her to feel better!