DUMB LAWS

Today we will do Florida!!!!!!! (let me know what state you'd like to see next) Yes, a gentlemen verified these laws through Tallahasse. Some have been repealed (will be noted). None the less, most of them are, er.....crazy

Florida

_* Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
* A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
* If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
* It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
* Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
* Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
* It is illegal to skateboard without a license.
* When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.
* You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.M. on Thursdays.
* It is considered an offence to shower naked.
* It is illegal to have oral sex ( MANY states have this )
* You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.
* Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.
* It is illegal to block any travelled wagon road.

Big Pine Key
* It is illegal to molest a Key deer. If caught one will be fined or will have to go to jail.

Cape Coral
* It is against the city ordinance to hang your clothes outside on a clothesline.
* It it illegal to park a pick-up truck in your driveway or in front of your house on the street. _This law is limited to only those who do not own the house. (Repealed 2000)

Daytona Beach
* The molestation of trash cans is banned.
* Swimming under the influence is illegal.
* Maintaining a car on your property which is no longer in use is prohibited.
* Owning a flower pot with water in it that isn't capable of draining is considered a public nuisance.

Hialeah
* Ambling and strolling is a misdemeanor.

Jupiter Inlet Colony Inlet
* Using slingshots to injure any kind of bird within the city limits is against the law.

Key West
* Chickens are considered a 'protected species'.

Miami
* It is illegal for men to be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
* All bicycles must have a bell or other warning device that may be heard from 100 feet away. However, sirens and whistles may not be used.

Naples
* Neon signs are prohibited.

Palm Bay
* Persons may not tow a sled behind their bicycles.

Pensacola
* Citizens may not be caught downtown without at least 10 dollars on their person.
* It is illegal to roll a barrel on any street, fines go up according to the contents of the barrel.
* A women can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils.

Pinecrest
* In order to operate a burglar alarm, a permit must be obtained.

Sanford
* Stage nudity is banned, with the exception of "bona fide" theatrical performances. Violating this ordinance results in a $100 fine.

Sarasota
* If you hit a pedestrian you are fined $78.00.
* You may not catch crabs.

Tampa Bay
* It is illegal to eat cottage cheese on Sunday after 6:00 P.M.

HI everyone! I hope everyone is doing well!

This weeks Zen Uncovers...Little Known Facts and other Such Stuff......

Some of these are racy guys, but you know you always wondered.....

Did you know.....

Vincent vanGogh only sold 1, yes one, painting during his lifetime. It seems his technique was a bit to 'unusual' at the time. Well he DID lob off his ear..... Anyway, Impressionism was the "In" technique at the time..and speaking of Impressionism...

Do you know where the word Impressionism came from? The word "Impressionism" came from the title of one of Claude Monet's paintings, Impression, Sunrise. An art critic, at the time, thought the work appeared sketchy and unfinished, showing everyone has their own "impression" of life and their surroundings.

Did you know...Goats and octopus' eyes have rectangular pupils?

The Ramses brand condom was named after the great Pharaoh Ramses II, who fathered over 160 children.

If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one foot in the air, he dies of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four on the ground, the person dies of natural causes.

To "testify" was based on men in the Roman court swearing to a statement. They would swear on their testicles. If they were found to have lied to the court, guess what happened? You got it...he lost his ability to ever 'testify' again.

A cockroach can live nine days without it's head before it starves to death.

Ok everyone it's a baaaaad word but have you ever wondered where it came from? The dreaded "F" word actually came from England. During many of the wars that were waged in the earlier centuries, the population became lacking to support the Kings need of good men to fight (seems the King planned on fighting for a looong time). He then declared a rule to replenish the population, he wanted citizens to "Fornicate Under Command of the King".

And last but not least....at least until I find more : )...

It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes shut. Try it! Your eyes bulge when you sneeze, but they won't fall out like previously rumored.

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EXPOSE'EM ALL
When there is a crime, or when you've been bad, you always leave a Smoking Gun.
Find out the sordid details at
http://www.thesmokinggun.com

ONLINE RORSCHACH TEST

Examine the sketches and discover if you're gay,
psychotic, depressed, predatory or otherwise
dangerously demented. (thats me)
http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/rorschach.htm

Re: The F word...

Another version of the word's origin:
Police would charge prostitutes with, "For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge."

Naughty naughty!

A Mexican general once had a funeral for his amputated leg, which was then stolen during riots.

The tallest living woman, Sandy Allen of Indiana, stands 7 ft 7 in. tall.

The tallest living man, Radhoune Charbib, stand 7ft 8.9 in.

The longest hair belongs to Hoo Sateow of Thailand, his hair measures 16 ft. 11in long!
(I'd hate to see his drain after a shower)

Ladies you'll love this (or hate her). Cathie Jung of the USA has the record of having the smallest waist. It measures only 15 in.! That's about the same size as a regular size jar of mayonnaise!

A podiatric nightmare. Lousie Hollis of California has the longest (eww) toenails that measure 7 in. long.

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Ever wonder? Ok some of these are gross, but interesting all the same....

Earwax: Earwax or cerumen, protect your ear from debris getting to far into the ear canal. Special glands in your canal generate ad ooze the wax for this purpose. And earwax also helps fight germs!

Hiccups: Your diaphragm is a muscle in your chest just below your lungs. When it contract of r tightens up your lungs expand and you inhale. When it loosens your lungs contract and exhale. With hiccups, your diaphragm suddenly jerks and you suck in air. That air flow causes the flap at the top of your throat to abrupty snap shut. That inhaling and snapping sound is a hiccup!

Boogers: Snot forms to protect your nasal passages and helps trap airborne particles from getting into your lungs. Your nose hair helps filter these things. Snot is made of salt and other body chemicals to make it thick so those tiny particles will stick to it. When snot becomes inundated with these particles it dries and hardens and you have generated a booger.

Sneezes: are the result of airborne particles that irritate your nasal passages or escape the snot and get into your lungs. a sneeze blasts these particles out. Your brain knows these particles are not good for your body!!

Eye Gunk: When you are awake your eye lashes work like windshield wipers to clean and remove tears from your eyes that drip down all the time to help lubricate your eye. When you are asleep your eyelashes aren't working to assist the removal of these tears. During the night tears, oils, sweat and other fun things accumulate in the corners of your eyes. As the night progresses, it can dry and become the crusties.

Zits: A pimple forms when a pore fills with sebum, an oil created by the follicles of your skin in the pores that hold your hairs. Sometimes the glands that form sebum go into overdrive and fill these pores to fast. This over abundance of sebum cause the hair to fall out and dead skin cells, dirt and bacteria get trapped underneath the sebum "plug", causing pus and pimple is formed. A blackhead is not dirt trapped, but a pore turned inside out that has been exposed to air!


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EMBARRASSING PROBLEMS

My life is FULL of embarrassing problems, including
belly button lint, which I'm only admitting here
because it's part of the healing process. : )
http://www.embarrassingproblems.com/


GET SOME LITTLE-HOUSE-ON-THE-PRAIRIE SKILLS

Make your own Glue, shampoo, lip balm, cough remedies,
mouthwash, household cleaners, car wax, skin cream...
on and on it goes. You'll never go the grocery store
again (except to buy the ingredients to make this stuff)
http://www.make-stuff.com/formulas/index.html