Take heart and comfort from that fact that though you didn't start any earlier, you didn't start any later.

Every day you stay on plan you are one step closer to shedding the pounds and becoming the optimal you.

T

I've been thinking about this post, as evidenced by the fact that I keep poking my nose in. I don't know why this post has so captivated me...maybe it's the word "panic". I know panic as it relates to weight and losing it and panic as it relates to social anxiety and believe me, it's all wrapped in there together.

I think there are two things at play in this thread:
1. Miriam, you want to lose the weight fast
2. You want to lose it without overhauling your lifestyles.

Which is more important to you? Neither of the above is wrong, in my opinion. But if your biggest desire is #1, to lose it fast, then I think Robin has it right. There is little room for error (or treats) in a plan for faster weight loss. Even then, I'm not sure there's a guarantee that it will come off faster, but there's a better chance if you follow her tried and true plan.

Robin's plan is too rigid for me. What I lack in the eating I make up for in exercise. I workout upwards of three hours a day right now because it's summer. I'm very rigid, just in a different way than Robin is. I like my chocolate too much. But I've also reached a point where I can indulge without blowing my whole day and certainly without blowing the diet.

I think there's something to be said for absoluteness at the beginning of a new healthy lifestyle. Eventually the guard can come down a bit.

I wasn't interested in losing it *fast* per se' or any other speed.

My main interest was in losing it in the easiest manner. And for me and many others like me, what you all describe as rigid, strict or what have you turns out to indeed be easiest.

Because like I said earlier, if you would have told me that my way WAS easiest, I would have told you you were nuts.

My way didn't come about by all of a sudden being this virtuous, holier than thou no sugar/no flour person. Nope, I knew that those were the foods that I overate - so I had to get rid of them. It was a MIRACLE to me that the cravings subsided when I did employ that method.

And then there's the rules - ha. Same thing. I knew they sounded kinda restrictive - no going off plan - but in doing that - it took away the decision making process of should I?/shouldn't I? and just this once, yada, yada, yada. And in a VERY short time it became automatic and EASY.

I'm relating to different parts of lots of posts in this thread:
1. I identify with the sense of panic that one's body is eventually going to give up if something isn't done about the weight.
2. I think 2 pounds per week of weight loss (without exercise) for the OP is heading in the right direction. Faster, no. Going in the right way, yes.
3. I'm with Robin in that, for me, rules and what others might think of as restrictions are guides for me to help me make new and long-term habits. I believe these habits will become second nature and simple over the course of the rest of my life, probably faster than I realize now, because I'm sticking so closely to them. I really can't allow myself one of those or a bite of that, because I know in the past that has caused me to go completely off plan. Others are probably a lot more flexible, which is the nice thing about this forum; there's a lot of information and a wealth of experience here. I simply prefer the freedom of not having to debate myself over every meal; plus, I, too, refuse to be hungry or eat nasty food. :-) Restriction/deprivation? Not to my way of thinking--freedom and much less stress!!
4. I also LOVE the concept that Eliana mentions about changing one's goals from wanting to lose a specified amount of weight to being on plan over a time line. Me, too!! I want to be "on plan" a year from now. The weight part will happen, and pretty fast, if I stay on plan (calorie counting and exercise).

I'm sending positive, supportive vibes to the OP. I've been there, too, really recently, up at night worried about dying early or having a horrible quality of life. But right now, we're here, going in the right direction. Focus on the positives you're doing for yourself and try to do one more positive thing for yourself each day. For you and for me, the weight loss will happen if the goal is overall health. Best wishes to you!!

Sweetheart, just keep on doing what your'e doing, and believing this time it will work. Self belief is half the battle. You have to find a place in your psyche that believes you are worth all the attention and effort it takes to lose weight. It's not an easy task, and requires physical and mental effort.
If you are impatient and want to see faster results, lose the things that you class as empty calories, and when you get in from work put on MTV and dance for 30 minutes. It's fun, makes you happy, and best of all does not feel like exercise
Go for it. You CAN and WILL do this, you just have to find the mental strength to beat the demons that have knocked so many of us off plan, time and time again, for years.
Hugs to you - find your positivity girlfriend !!

I just wanted to thank you all for your your support and wonderful advice! It's so funny a day after I wrote this me and my hubby went away for the weekend-we went to the ocean. normally a time I would allow my self to eat whatever I wanted because "I was on vacation"- And I didn't I told myself that I could have one treat or one slightly off plan meal fro each day I was there but every other meal Had to be perfectly on plan and even a little lighter then normal to make up for the extra calories I'd consume- I did it I stuck to that and it wasn't hard at all.. I found I actually LIKE eating on plan - for breakfast my last day there I had full fat pancakes, scrambled eggs and bacon ( what used to be my favorite breakfast) after I ate it I thought it was good. but I think I'd have rather had my oatmeal with fresh fruit- isntead..lol

And while I was there I noticed in some of the pictures my hubby took " I looked better some how" I was more photogenic...and I realized There is a difference it's very minor and very slight but I DO see a change! I thin k getting away was just good for me in general I work really long hours and a 5 day work week my weekends usually consist of doing errands, house work and what ever I cant' do during the week.. i think that's why I've felt so panicky lately

ANyways your guys support was very helpful - I think I have learned that even though it's slower then I'd like it's steady. and IT"S LIVABLE! I've picked a plan that I enjoy- I don't feel miserable on and best of all it's working! It's all about making healthy choices each and every healthy choice I make for myself is one step closer to my goal..

Wow, a lot of people relate to this post for one reason or another. That's great that we all have each other here. Mariamherrera, you are doing great, keep up all the hard work, and don't give up while your are trying to figure it all out. Just keep going. You will do this!

Thanks Robin for your motivating words, especially " require more of yourself..." in your original reply. I sure did need to read these words today!