Hello all!

Well, the day didn't end on a good note yesterday. I am still dealing with my stomach having stretched to an enormous size from the huge portions I was eating. I was STARVING all afternoon. I munched quite a bit, but nothing bad, until...... An evil banana split got me!! I tried desperately to shield it off with a spoon, but it got control of the spoon and shoveled itself into me!! I feel so violated!! My bad. I was soooo hungry and my DH brought it home with him so I ate it. What can I say? Tae Bo makes me hungry.

I woke up feeling crummy again today. I didn't sleep worth beans last night. The anxiety of my DH leaving and all the things that are left to be done are really getting to me. Food is good so far today. Haven't done any exercise yet. I have to take my son to the doctor in a little while, so maybe I can do it when I get home. This is SUCH a struggle right now. Oh well, onward!!

Gotta get my rugrats ready to go. Talk at ya later,
Jen

Hi everyone! I have sooooo much paperwork to do it's not funny. But I have that P R O C R A S T I N A T I O N thing going on too and I'm much rather be here with you all than doing it, soooooo HERE I AM!!!!

Food has been pretty decent this week, but I'm falling behind in my promise to journal! What is it about that darn piece of paper that makes me so nutts??????? I just HATE it!!!!

Water is good. Exercise is non-existent, as usual. You all are having such a good time with Richie Poo, I guess I don't want to remind him who he really cares about!!

For Fun Friday I went out to lunch with friends for my birthday, a little belated but it was the first chance we had to get together.

LuckyLadyBug: Don't you look colorful!!! Your post really brightens the place up!!! * As you can see P*R*O*C*R*A*S*T*I*N*A*T*I*O*N is my specialty too! * Dh and I took ballroom dancing classes some years ago. It was really fun and also counted as a night out. We would always make sure that that was our night to go out to dinner and then to the lesson. Lots of fun!!!

Katrina: Sorry you had such a rough night. Was it a full moon? I didn't pay any attention. * I have that book, but haven't read it. That's my problem, I buy all these darn books and then never sit down to read them. I guess I prefer to be here, then sitting in a chair reading. I just picked up Energy Breakthrough, the new one by Sarah Ferguson, the Duchess of York. I have all her other ones too, unread of course!!! Must find the time!!!

2cute: WOW, some storm out your way!!! Glad it didn't get to you directly. Sounds like a whole bunch of folks will be trying to live pretty primitively for a couple of weeks! * I'm so glad to hear the burns are healing for you! That lip will be 'kissable' in no time!

Jen: Don't worry about that banana split, it's over and done now! Let's look at the bright side: You need 3 servings of dairy each day, so there's the ice cream; the banana is a fruit; if there was some strawberry topping, that's a fruit; if there were marachino cherries, that's a fruit; nuts are protein; and the chocolate syrup is a veggie, after all it comes from the cocoa BEAN, doesn't it???? Now, don't feel so bad. You got all your dairy, your 5 fruits/veggies and even some protein in in just one snack!!! Move on, it will be ok!!!

Well girls, I guess I better go start on that paperwork!!! *trudging towards the paper and pen* YUCK!!! You all have a great day!!!

"Doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment." - Oprah Winfrey

Hello all

Today has been stressfull. I had to read the riot act to my son. He was suppose to work today(Usually works 4 10 hr. days) He just didn't go in . He told me he didn't have to work today but when DH got to work they ask where's Robert he was suppose to work. OH well. I told him next time he would be looking for a new place to live
Enough of my problems I am floating from all the water I have had. I've already had 57 oz and am on another 33 oz bottle now.

No Fun Friday for me.

Thank Kat that was very nice of you to post that.

2Cute Happy you are almost normal..well, lets say back to being you!!!

I just got home from seeing my Dad. I have tons of organizing ideas for tomorrow so I sure hope I wake up in the mood.

We are suppose to get an inch of snow tonight and then it will be 30 degrees tomorrow. Yippee....melt that stuff... Of course, then I end up with mud....but better than snow!!!

Are any of you gardeners?

Thin I used to go out dancing 5 or 6 nights a week a few years ago and really had fun. Now, since I moved, there is no where to dance and I have no one to dance with....anyone playing the violin?????

Grannie Hang in there...sounds like you are doing great with your water. As far as your son goes, I don't really have any good advise just keep taking deep breathes...I find that helps in any situation.

Hope to see you all this weekend. I will need some breaks while organizing.

How is everyone doing tonight.??
Hubby and I went out for a nice dinner then an unproductive night at the slots. I had doubled my money... but ended up losing by the time we came home.

It is soooo nice when the food is not a problem. I was not tempted once to cheat. Substituted an extra veggie for my potato and left the homemade roll sitting untouched. While driving home hubby wanted to stop for an ice cream... and told him to go ahead but I did not want one. What is so great... I really did not want one.

Kat... you have got to share some of those organizing ideas. I need help!!!
As far as gardening... been there, done that. LOL
I have grown some HUGE tomato plants.. but my carrots were the size of my pinky. LOL. I am no good at maintance. Plant well... pick product well .... but the in between I suck at.
And far as dancing goes.... I plan on dancing regularly when I get this weight off. I barely can walk now.

Mary... my heart goes out to you with your son. I have great kids... but they can drive me insane sometimes.
good job with the water intake. Thumbs up!!!!

Thin... again we are two peas in a pod. I have every book imagineable and I haven't read a single one. When I was in OA I not only read the AA book I almost had it memorized my heart. It has taught me soooo much. Many people have a problem substituting Food for alcohol... but I didn't. I could TOTALLY relate. If any of you are having relationship problems I recommend the Alanon books. It is not just for family members of alcoholics.
Thin... I will experiment with that lip licking again... but I could only get it to post at the bottom.

Lucky lady... Hope you get your organizing done this weekend.
If you have any good ideas please share them with us.
You have such a variety of exercise routines. That makes it much more fun.. and we need all the fun we can get.

I am out of time... I hope I didn't miss anyone since the last time I responded to everyone.
Fun Friday... losing at the casino wasn't much fun. LOL
I did get a lot of bills paid today and that was fun to get it out of the way and NOT PROCRASTINATE.
This little lady looks like she is having fun.

Hi everyone,

Did okay today up until my afternoon break. I had an ice cream sandwich and it went downhill from there. I don't know how I'm going to meet my goal of 4 lbs by 2/8/02 at the rate I'm going. I'm bummed at this moment. Families are too weird sometimes. My brother has a major problem. He doesn't work and just rants all the time. Funny with my dad around he felt totally secure. With my mom, he's on shaky ground. He actually told my mom, her money was dad's estate. I told him, are you claiming you have a right to mom's money? Death affects people in different ways. Tonight he told me, whenever he talks he's talking specifically to my mom because I don't matter in his life. I guess it's back to not talking to him again. We made up at my dad's deathbed after 7 years of not talking. I'm sorry to dump like this, but I feel pretty unhappy right now. Like I'm a nothing coming from a loser that's rich. I told him straight--I deal with customer's everyday. I'm not stuck behind a counter this time and I'm leaving the room. I refuse to let him ruin my weekend a second time. Time to get a job buddy.

Change of subject.

Katrina, I have Oprah's book also. I never read beyond the second chapter, but I'll give it a try once again.

Lucky, I garden. I'm keeping a garden journal. Describing the weather, my plantings, fertilizing, spraying schedules. I stopped at Ross' tonight and got a planter from the clearance shelf. I'm going to plant a maidenhair fern for the office. The office is cool and bright. It'll love it there. Other than ferns I'm growing gerbera daisies and roses. Everything is growing and blooming with the major rain we had this past week. We really have no seasons here in Hawaii. Just some rain and cool weather.

I stopped at Wally World tonight. Bought the mango peach water. No black cherry in stock. I also bought craft pens to dress up my weight journal. I hope to get lots done this weekend.

Here's to dreams,
Malia

Malia... you could use a hug... {{{HUG}}}
Death does weird things to people and money does weird things to people. Combine the two together and it can be a HUGE problem. It sounds like you did not let him push you around and that is good. Be sure to take good care of yourself and that will help you deal with others. Please know we are here for you.

I guess you guys will probably not remember me.....it has been several months since I've posted. I have changed shifts at work and it has been difficult for me to get on the computer very much. I have also been looking into having the gastric bypass surgery, but have just about decided against it looking at all the horror stories. I have been fat all my life. For as long as I can remember and I am just about at my wits end. I'm 32 and weigh aprox. 330 pounds. I have tried all the diets out there. Weight Watchers. Formu3, Phen Phen, Thermoslim, Chitosol, weighed the food, counted the fat grams and drunk water till I feel like I'm floating away. And I am miserable. I get winded walking to the mailbox. None of my clothes fit. I can't fit comfortably in a movie theater seat or booth in a restaurant. There are tons of places I can't even go because of my weight. My children are embarassed of me. (They would never admit to this and have never said anything.) Maybe I'm just embarassed for them. I don't see how my husband has climbed this mountain for the last 14 years. I recently went to a t-shirt shop & bought my two sons a t-shirt and my husband one, and the salesman said, "Maam...I have one just for you too. This one will really make a statement. It had a picture of a dinosaur on it with the caption reading, "If you think I'm big, wait until you see God." I wanted to just die right there in the store. Of course, that doesn't even compare to the time I was sitting in my son's doctor's office waiting room (full of people of course) and a little girl walked up to me (probably 6 or 7) and said, "Your big." What was I supossed to say? Thank you! I said, "Yes, and smiled my big ol dopey grin and wanted to smack her mother for not keeping a tighter leash on this adorable whippersnapper and then she asked the question that still makes my heart stop beating. "Do you fit inside your house?" I can still feel the hot tears coming to my eyes remembering this. Anyways, I guess I have bummed you guys out long enough. I am looking for any new ideas, other than crawling in a hole for the next 50 years. I promise, I will be a faithful poster this time and might even learn how to get one of those pretty pictures under my name or how to insert one of those neat pictures at the end of my ramblings. Hope I havent brought you down. I'm just trying to lift myself up. Thanks

Welcome back Tina. Just keep plugging away thae weight will come off.

Malia I know how you feel I also have a brother that I hardly ever talk to. His wife died in Feb of last year I was there for him but he is so depressed and he resents everyone. He hasn't seen mother since 1995. He won't even talk to her. {{{HUGS}}}}

DH and I are going in to see a movie today and out to dinner. I'll be back later.

Hello All,

I have been scolded by another member for not posting...So I gave her my word I would post today!

One of the reasons I don't post is because it takes me so long to write what I want to say in response to individual posts. I am afraid I will miss someone. Please know I care about each and everyone of you & am cheering you on in your weight loss journey.

Another reason for "lurking" is I have been having quite the time of it the past year or so. I didn't want to have my negative attitude show.

For truly there was a time I just couldn't see much of anything in a positive light. I am thankful to say that things are much better now. I am not a negative person by nature, and it was tough to ask my MD for help. I am taking Zoloft now and it has helped my outlook considerably. That and the fact that I was feeling quite desperate about situations that were no fault of mine..but I felt I had to try and "fix". We probably have all been there at one time or another...seems it is the womans lot to nuture and to "fix" and to fuss at things if she can't make them right..or at least to come up with options...well, I was feeling out of options for awhile.

It is funny how quickly things can change....I now have options and things don't feel hopeless anymore. May I say if any of you are suffering from depression please don't suffer by yourself, talk to a friend, seek medical advice...do something...life is so much more enjoyable when you do.

TT and 2Cute have been there for me...We are so darned lucky they are part of this forum...But NEVER FORGET we are ALL REMARKABLE women with VALUE...Value to ourselves and others.
Everyone of us has something to offer and we wouldn't be sharing our thoughts and our struggles if we didn't want to help each other and ourselves!

I was thinking long and hard about what I wanted to say to you all today....I guess that I have said it! Love to All....

Syn... My eyes are all whelled up with tears. They are not happy tears nor sad tears... they are... compassionate tears. I am SOOOO very proud of you for posting. I know how hard that can be... especially when you are suffering. But we were not meant to travel this road of life alone. I am sooo happy you are seeking help from others. Just yesterday I had to call my friend and cry my eyes out because of some family problems I was having. In the past I would try and carry the load alone. NOT ANY MORE. I need help and support and I am no longer too proud to ask for a shoulder to cry on. She knows that I don't expect her to have all the answers... just a shoulder to cry on, some support to lean on, and often a few words of wisdom that I needed to be remined of.
It is soo good to have you back.

QueenB... of course I remember you!!! Welcome HOME.
I am sooo glad you decided against the surgery. I have a site that has photos and diary of a woman who had that surgery and then the skin removal from both front and back. It would definitely change your mind.
We all know the pain you are feeling... we all have been there. But there IS a better life for you... and posting here hopefully will help you find it. It has sure helped me.
Kids sure can be cruel... it sucks.. but unfortunately it is here to stay. When kids tell me I am fat I do just as you did... say "yes, I am" and then refrain myself from tripping them as they walk away. But I must say... it does not cause me the pain like it used to. Maybe because my own self worth has gone up while my weight is slowlyyyyy going down.
No... that is only half true. My self worth went UP when I started taking better care of me and eating healthier. Even when my weight stayed the same.
Anyway.... we are glad you are back... and we are going to make you keep that promise of being a faithful poster.
You have made a GREAT first step in lifting yourself UP. Now fill up a water bottle and start drinking. Water REALLY does do a body good. LOL

Grannie.... I am surprised your hubby is leaving the house since you got those new panties.
Which movie are you going to go see.??

I have got to get going. I would live on this stupid computer if I could. I have to FORCE myself to clean. Heck.. I have to FORCE myself to even have FUN. LOL
Don't forget... today is Sit up Saturday. That means get off your butt and do something physical... anything.
Love and kisses

Hi everyone! I cannot believe it is 3:30 in the afternoon! I haven't done a darn thing all day except make breakfast. Yeeesh!!!

The journalling this week has been out the window and that does not make me a happy camper. Journalling and success go hand in hand and I just can't seem to get past it. I need help!!!

Mary: Sorry your son is giving you a hard time. Sometimes I think we make it too easy on our adult children that they take us for granted. My oldest doesn't even talk about moving out. He likes his laundry done and his meals provided. The youngest says he'll be out within a year of graduating from college. We'll see. We don't require him to do anything around the house, how good could he possibly have it???

LuckyLadyBug: Sure, I'll play the violin for you. We just need to get out and DO it. Just like with anything else.

2cute: Glad you and hubby had a nice night out. It is nice when the urge to indulge doesn't exist. My DH got out the chips and dip after breakfast/lunch this morning and all I could think of was 'didn't you have enough? How could you eat chips on top of breakfast?' Guess I was being judgemental, but I didn't have those 'needs'.

Malia: Gosh it's too bad about your brother. But like 2cute said, death and money are not good partners for a happy life. Seems like those two items really bring out the nasties when it comes to families. [[[[[hugs]]]]] Good for you walking away!

Tina: Of course I remember you. I'm glad you've decided not to have the surgery. I've only heard horror stories about it. A little discipline and we can all be thinner without the added risks of surgery. * Isn't it awful when kids say hurtful things. I'm always very interested in how the parents react to what their kids say. I have to tell you, I have never been impressed with their response. Most just try to act like they didn't hear their obnoxious little monsters! * My best advice: 5 servings of fruits/veggies a day and at least 6 glasses of water every day. Start with that. You'll be surprised at what a difference just those 2 things will make in your life.

Syn: I'm glad you ventured in to post. It's good for the soul. Everyone here has gone through or is going through some difficult times and we are all here for each other. Don't worry if you don't have the time to answer everyone. We've all been in that spot before too. It's just very therapeutic to write here and have friends that will send HUGS. I'm glad you're back!!! [[[hugs]]]

Well girls, I'm off to the store. Out of salad and toilet paper, ya know. You all have a fun day. Don't forget to get out your recipes for tomorrow. (now, don't everyone hide!!! )

When you know when to laugh and when to look upon things as too absurd to take seriously, the other person is ashamed to carry through even if he was serious about it." - Eleanor Roosevelt

2Cute Don’t you love that feeling of power when you say “no” to food – And Mean It.!!
I find I can do it more and more often.

Just because you “harped” at us I did do the physical thing today. I also am in the process of cleaning and organizing a shelf area. I needed a break so I came to say howdy…..

Malia I feel sad that your brother talks to you like that. I have a brother and 2 sisters. We all respect and love each other and are very close. I think we are this way because our Mother died when we were young so we clung to each other. I am thankful everyday for each of them. My brother and his family live across the road from me.

I am impressed with your garden journal. I think I will have to take that idea and to it also. At my age I can’t remember anything if I don’t write it down.

Tina I post on another thread called “What are we really hungry for”. You may want to check it out. The exercises we follow from a book by Geneen Roth that helps us look inside of ourselves and at the reasons we eat.

Keep coming here we will lift your spirits or whine with you!!!

Syn Are you out from under the snow? I heard you got some on Thursday. Luckily we were spared the latest storm.

Glad you feel better and are back to posting regularily!!! I missed you. Us northern girls have to stick together.

ThinBesides NOT exercising, journaling is also this nagging thing in my head I don’t do. I have to figure out a way to do it that I like or else I know I won’t.

RUSH to the store – you never want to be with out toilet paper.

Thanks for the hugs and words of support. You all truly mean alot to me. I thank God that these family squabbles are lessening after the initial grieving. I had a good talk with my mom. She pegged him, but it still brings up the negative. I'm tired of being large but invisible too. It hurts just the same from a schizoid.

Tina, I hurt for you. Kids get away with the most cruel remarks. The making of an adult. Don't worry. Most of us aren't on any plan. Done that. We're starting with baby steps. One at a time. Water, fruit, veggies, and exercise to start. Most importantly, we're here for each other for the spirit & mind food. You're in no way alone. We're here for and with you.

Syn, I don't know what happened these last few months. But I'm here for you too. We can do this together. Life's tough, but it won't get the best of us. Take care of yourself.

Lucky, good comment on journal writing. It made me laugh. I bought fancy gadgetry (pens, stamps) for my journal yesterday. One thing on my to do list.

With that, like 2cute, I have to organize my bedroom. I need to get off the computer and start right now.

Aloha,
Malia

Good evening to all of you

DH and I went to see I am Sam It was a real tear jerker. Even DH was crying.
We went to Red Hot and Blue for dinner. Its a Memphis BBQ place here in Mississippi. I am wearing my new oriental pajamas that Dh got me for christmas. I really look snazzy.

Glad we have so many ladies posting we all need each others support.

Talk to all of you tomorrow.

Oh yea 2 Cute hubby likes the panties