Hi Mami!

I fly by the seat of my pants most of the time, and that's how I like it! Loosey-Goosey!!! I could NEVER stick with one plan!

Cheryl

My only "plan" has been to try to eat no more than 1200-1500 calories and exercise. Sometimes it's a little less if I don't really feel that hungry. I'm the type to eat more than 3 times but I eat smaller portions. The only junk food I really crave is salty snacks so I have those but use portion control. For instance, some days for me look like this:

Breakfast: Crystal Light iced tea & 2 Lean Pocket Bacon, Egg & Cheese (300 cals)
Lunch: Turkey sandwich on lo-cal bread, lo cal mayo & lettuce (less than 200 cals) plus a 100 cal snack pack or the equivalent...or a Lean Pocket Pizza (280 cals)...diet soda or a flavored water
Dinner: Lean Cuisine or Healthy Choice (anywhere from about 250-400 cals) and the Crystal Light iced tea or flavored water
Snacks: this usually happens in the evenings, once or twice...This can be seedless grapes, 100-calorie pack of Cheese Nips with my flavored water...or even another turkey sandwich if I'm particularly hungry

There are a couple of things I haven't bought because I feel I might be too tempted to pig out on those (Pringles, ding, ding, ding!!!) but, thankfully, I can control myself around most other junk food. I don't even miss cheeseburgers and fries much. But I think the fact that I haven't really restricted anything but just modified it or reduced it has worked for me. When Salt Monster roars out, she gets her 100 calories of salty nips and she's okay. I think if I had gone totally cold turkey (pardon the pun), I'd have binged long before now. With Easter and a couple of other events coming up for me in April, certain meals will be bigger but I don't really foresee a problem. I think it's more important what I'm doing for myself most days as opposed to the occasional days where the meals are a little more out of my control. They won't turn into quicksand for me. It'll be "Yum, that was a huge dinner tonight. Tommorrow, back to normal."

I go off plan on the weekends (I can't escape skinny boyfriend's brats-and-beer grillfests!) and when Tom comes for a visit.

somedays, I want a couple of Reese's Pieces - so I eat em. I don't overanalyze it, I don't freak out thinking I'm going to gain everything back, I just adjust what I eat the next day or do a little bit more exercise for the benefit of my mental health. It's no use worrying about slipping up yesterday, it's what you do today that matters.

Heck, yes. In fact, my goal is to be able to go off plan - that's real life, after all, and that's what normal eating means to me. The key is to do it infrequently, and to then get back on plan right away, not next Monday morning. My "plan" is pretty loosely structured anyway, because I've given up on formal diets. I'm trying to make some sustainable changes and not go back to bingeing, and I've found that the best way to do that is to not put unrealistic expectations on myself to eat "perfectly" all of the time.

Honey, Honey, Honey. I think we all go off plan sometimes. I took a break the other week. I quit logging in Fitday and pretty much ate what I wanted. I think we would go nuts if we didn't. I did come back after a week and I am more motivated now. I needed a break! Like others have said, this is a life long way of eating and it has to be something we can live with. So don't beat yourself up. Your doing well and I'm sure you'll be fine.

I think the process is the goal-- by eating healthier most of the time I'm eating healthier most of the time and I'm losing weight. For me, the freakouts at going off-plan when I'm otherwise eating perfectly aren't worth the mental gymnastics. Good enough often enough works for me.

I wonder how having/having had more to lose versus less to lose plays into how we look at this.

As my new lifestyle changes are intended to stay this way for the rest of my life, I allow myself "cheat days" now and then. If I stall because of it, I don't take it too hard -- this is a lifelong change, and as long as I am, on average, heading downwards, then it's all good. Slow and steady works for me, so long as I can maintain it for the rest of my life. ...that said, my "cheat days" are relatively tame...and I try not to take them too often.

At any rate, you certainly aren't alone!

My plan is to avoid high-sodium foods and to eat nutrient rich foods.

I'm not sure its specifically a more/less to lose thing as much as a "why were you overweight" thing maybe?

I see a lot of people swearing off fastfood/junkfood/pop, etc and for me that was never my weakness. Unless I was self-sabotaging (which was a deliberate hate based action that has nothing to do with cravings or habits) I rarely ate junk, I have portion control/hunger recognition issues.

So basically I am eating the same foods I always ate, which in someways makes it harder (I am not trying to diminish how hard it is to change your life). It is for me easier to say "no more fast food", never have it around, never go there than it is to say "only 4 oz of lean chicken breast" when there is more left. Or only 5 almonds whatever. I can easily add 5-600 calories to my diet without eating a single unhealthy food.

I think given that Mami gained the weight mostly because of pregnancy and has maintained a low weight in the past, it is a difference between NOT needing to overhaul her life
and having to battle a strategy that has WORKED in the past for maintaining a healthy weight. Then it is really not a choice between unhealthy and healthy, its a choice between healthy and healthy faster. The stakes are much lower

One of the things that is helping me this time is I am not beating myself up most of the time, I am just trying to learn WHY. Some days the answer is "I was HUNGRY" in which case kudos to me for recognizing it and responding to it. I dont believe our bodies need the exact same amount of fuel every day and rigid adherance to a number is more dangerous then occasionally overeating.

Some days the answer is less positive, but it can be a learning experience just the same. Some times the lesson is that I can not handle certain social situations so to go to them with a plan to only eat a tiny amount of food is just setting myself up for failure...so I am trying different strategies, hoping to find one that works eventually

Sometimes it is learning trigger foods

Sometimes it is learning to recognize self hate

Sometimes I cant figure it out so I just let it go

Perfectionism is the most dangerous enemy.

I also believe in practicing maintenance...I am good at dieting and bad at maintenance.

Hi, since my "plan" is to eat health-IER for the rest of my life, I can't honestly say i've ever been "off plan". I was also above 300 and realized I have to do this the rest of my life.

Normally I don't eat processed foods, flour, sugar, caffine, that type of thing, but on special occasions I indulge in certain things. New Years Eve I had ice cream and champagne, then I was "on plan" until last Thursday when I made the decision to have a nice dinner for my date which included steak and mushrooms, baked potato with nothing on it, sauteed fresh veggies, wine and chocolate tort. It was WONDERFUL and I never felt guilty or deprived. That's not what life is about. I simply went on the next day as though it never happened. I only weigh myself every couple of weeks now and have averaged a steady half pound loss a week and right now that is fine with me. I could restrict myself more or exercise more, but I have no desire to do so right now.

As others have said we are all different. We just have to find what works for us.

Mami, I didnt mean to diminish your journey, just an example of how it could be psychologically different

Hey ladies..wanted to thank you so much for your support. I've finally just surfaced after a very busy day out. My appetite has finally come under control..I do tend to max out at about 3 days of overeating and then I get full and sick of carbs and junk. Plus being out and not around the house sure helps! Today I've had 1568 calories and burned 600 on the elliptical, so back OP! This morning before we left your messages of support did spur me on to make it a good day while out. I dont usually feel guilty when I've been overeating, but I really had intended to get back OP yesterday and I did really badly, so was hoping posting would head that off. Well it worked! Just knowing you all are out there keeping yourselves on target gave me the motivation I needed!

Robin, you are so right and I certainly don't underestimate the difference between the featherweights' circumstances versus say 100 pound club members'. I'm so glad you've found this motivation..now if you could just bottle it up and sell it you'd make billions.

Thanks Tammy and Doughnut for your much appreciated compliments.

You all are right, I'll get there and I shouldn't be wining about a minor set back when I'm relatively so close. Hope I wasn't be insensitive to anyone else's plight .

Also realized I was eating DH's high calorie snacks because I hadn't bought any low-cal snacks for myself. So I got some cool whip light and a couple of bananas and ate this for desert. I must admit, I honestly found it as satisfying as DH's entenmann's cake (which is 360 calories for a tiny sliver!). I also got some 40 calorie grape popsycles and had one. Substitution is key for me when I'm having the munchies as I just dont have the discipline to not eat if I feel like it. So I guess having some lower calorie snacks are a must for weekends.

I would agree with this ennay. This is exactly how I maintained my weight all those years..and a struggle it was I must admit, but doable and I was never deprived. I've always eaten a lot on the weekends and less during the week. I do eat my junk food now and then, but generally I eat healthy food..but too much of it sometimes when I'm feeling like eating (which tends to be every weekend). Wish I could be one of those really disciplined types that never look back (like say Robin or Glory) but I'm more of the instant gratification type. I just try to minimize the damage as best I can. And that's worked for me over the years. Its just a lot easier to maintain that way than to lose because a stumble delays things..but that's OK.

Thanks again everyone for putting this in perspective and giving me some support and motivation. Much appreciated!

First of all, dear G-d how I wish I COULD bottle up this determination that I have found. Big time. I would certainly love the billions, but more importantly I'd love to share it with everyone here and everyone in need of weightloss, I am truly passionate about it now and I wish there were some way to pass it along.

I don't know what kind of eating plan you are on, I don't know if you care to share it. But I know for me, and me only I must plan each and every meal and each and every snack. I have the entire week mapped out in front of me. It really and truly helps me to stay ON plan. And that's really the key. As far as you said about substitutions, well that is another big key for me. I have found foods that I love just as much as the old stuff, meals and snacks alike. I have the jello 60 calorie chocolate puddings (they have lots of yummy flavors) with a squirt of fat free whipped cream and some Fiber One cereal tossed in. Tastes like chocolate pudding pie. All for about 85-90 calories. And that does it for me. I know I have one of those to look forward to and I'm satisfied.

One other thing, don't kill me for saying this. I know you are very into figuring out what your exercise burns, calorie wise and the such. But for me, and again this is just me, everyone has to do what works for them and what they think is best - I keep my calories and my exericse totally and completely separate. In other words I dont determine how much "extra" I can eat because I've exercised a certain amount. Or even how many calories I've just burned. To me, my exercise is my exercise and must be done and will burn whatever calories they will burn and my calories are my calories and must be stuck to. Like nothing changes for me eating wise, if I've had a very physical day, like I was out walking all day long for whatever reason. I don't see that as a reason to eat more, I just see it as a bonus. I don't think I'm really explaining myself too well here, but hopefully you get what I'm trying to say. Where's Jayell, or somebody who knows how to write eloquently? Jay could probaly say it better for me.

Anyway, you were not even CLOSE to insensitive about anyone else's plight. Not at all. Nor were you whiny at all. That's why we're here, to help and support you in any way that you need. I know that you'll get where you want to be, really I have no doubt. But you sure are lucky that while getting there you look as beautiful as you do. Your avatar pic is really stunning. Hang in there.

I definitely go off plan at times and sometimes it takes me a couple days to get straightened back out. I don't know how to change my ticker or I'd be changing it most every day. My wt. bounces around. I have days that I'm super motivated and nothing could cause me to stray. Other days that I eat more than I should and feel guilty but keep eating. Sometimes, I get lazy and don't exercise when I know I should. Sometimes I over-exercise to try to compensate for eating too much. For me, this is just life. I'm not perfect and I never will be. But, over-all I still KNOW that I eat healthier and AM healthier than I was before I started trying to lose the weight. My goal is/was to maintain at 145. I range anywhere from 137-148 depending on the day. This is definitely still a struggle for me, but being too hard on myself only makes my eating worse. I've now been on plan for a total of 2 days this time. Weekends are generally the hardest for me and Thursday's (DH's pay day when we normally eat out).

rockinrobin, I know exactly what you are saying. Yesterday I worked 7 1/2 hrs. outside. (Hard physical labor) and I had the fleeting thought that I burned a lot of extra calories and could afford to eat a little more, but I resisted and felt better for it.

Thanks for the compliments, always appreciated!

I must say your posts really motivated me to get back on track. It really does help to post when you're falling off.

As far as what my plan is? I tend to calorie count my foods and activites and then deduct to get the deficit. I try to eat lower calorie foods, and change my recipes to be more healthy (all the while hoping and praying DH wont notice otherwise he wont eat it). Unfortunately, I have little will power so if I feel like having something, even if it will totally blow my planned calorie count, I'll have it anyway. A perfect example was last night after I posted I ended up having 2 of DH's cookies (150 calories) for no reason; had I not seen them on the table I wouldn't have eaten anything but I just grabbed one and even after DH gave me a disapproving look (because I've asked him to help me not eat his junk) I went for another one. This morning I noticed there are about 5 left and I cant wait for him to finish them. I've gotta stop buying junk for him! LOL I guess my plan is a modified version of Cheryl14's "flying by the seat of my pants" but trying to keep within planned weekly calorie levels when possible.

I tried to figure out what happened to get me off plan. The last 2 weeks I've been a bit stressed at work so I haven't been eating much, so by the end of the week I'm literally starving. And once I start trying to fill up, I guess I keep going.

Because of my large appetite and lack of discipline, the only way I can keep weight off and even lose is to incorporate as much exercise as possible. This has always been key to my maintaining my weight and I believe is what's helped me lose weight. When I had my RMR tested, the test even noted how many more calories I can eat per day if I exercise 30 minutes at moderate intensity 5 days per week. So I do think the two are linked and can be used, for those of us who eat a lot and are not as disciplined as the Robins of the world (God bless your strength woman!), to help lose.

So this week the plan is to not be too hungry during the week that I start munching on Friday and the weekend to make up for it. Let's see how this works!

And for those who dont like weighing everyday? Me being up 3 pounds when I should have been down 4 by now - though my deficits are still in the right direction so hoping this is water - is sure a motivator for me!

Lilybelle, maintaining is indeed a lifelong struggle but so worth it and so do-able. You're doing great just the way you're doing it!