I've learned to think of any hate I have to be directed at my body's current CONDITION (too much fat and poor lung capacity) and what I do like about my body I tend to think of as permanent TRAITS (hourglass figure and relatively fit). No matter what size you are at your body will always have those permanent traits, and the things you hate are only a temporary condition that you have the power to change.
I used to HATE my body. I'd try to starve myself, I'd binge and purge. I'd do all these terrible things to it to try to make it different. But as I got older, I realized that I needed to love and respect my body. So I began trying to find things about it I liked. ANd there's quite a bit I like. I like that it pushes me through the water when I swim. I like that my legs carry me where I need to go. And even though I don't love everything about it, I respect my body and love it as is and I'll love it when I'm at goal weight just as much.
I don't know - tough question. I don't hate my body and I didn't hate it at its heaviest. It's hard to define 'love' though in relationship to your own body. I have never stopped meeting people, doing things or going anywhere because of my weight and that includes things like swimming.
I suppose that's the reason it took me so long to start to lose weight - there was just no reason to. It wasn't because I didn't love my body. I know that sounds strange.
It only started to annoy me when things would physically happen that would alert me that I might have gone too far - like I can't put the armrest down on the plane or barely snap my seat belt, or the ride safety bar won't close. The bloodwork I had last year wasn't exactly the picture of health either. So that's when I decided I should probably lose weight.
So I guess I equate "loving your body" to self esteem. That's me though, and not all people.
I may be the odd person out in this conversation, but I "LOVE" my body.
It's not a pretty thing to look at, I'm 52, I had twin boys at the age of 20, that weighed over 6 pounds each. That was a train wreck for the visual appearance of my body! I've gained and lost and well, you know the story.
Plus I'm way to short to ever look like Cindy Crawford. I do admire Gabriella Reese as well, another one I'm way to short to look like, Oh well.
I have maintained my current loss since Sept. 2011. I got bored and started a strength training program. While I have stretch marks up the wazoo and saggy girls and will never look like a super model, my body is an amazing thing.
I can easily deadlift my body weight, I can do one armed dumb bell rows with 45 pound weights, I'm doing split squats with 60 pounds.
My body is amazing, and I love every inch of it, saggy girls, stretch marks, wrinkles, hard core arms, the definition in my legs, my slimmer waist. I actually like to look at it in the mirror in the morning.
Given what I've put my body through, I think I look dang good!
Instead of dwelling on what you perceive as bad things about your body, embrace the positive!
I think when people are just beginning this new phase, there is this belief that when you become thinner, everything about your appearance will be better. Sometimes, new appearance problems arise as a result of the weightloss.
Also, when you look at other people, do you hate how they look? There is usually *something* physically attractive about the person.
I've never hated my body. Not even when I was 207 lbs. I mean, I was definitely disatisfied with how I looked, but it was never a loathing thing.
I usually feel like this: I really do love my body - overall it's healthy, it works well, and I'm reasonably comfortable in it. But as far as how it looks, I would like a different aesthetic (smaller, better proportioned), which is one of the reasons I'm losing weight.
What actually kicked off my most recent and longest effort to lose weight was that I was getting very uncomfortable in my body, and I'd never felt uncomfortable in my skin. It got to the point where it felt like I was trapped and claustrophobic. So I buckled down and got to work.
I don't know if that helped, but that was my main process. I felt okay, but I would have preferred to look different. And that's not to say I didn't have times of absolute shame about how I looked - they just didn't last that long.
And I do think one of the reasons I've always ultimately liked my body is that it's always been healthy and given me not many problems. And I'm naturally pretty strong and pretty fast (for someone who barely works out). It's nice.
I don't hate my body, I can't. It didn't involuntarily put food in my mouth and not exercise all these years. I did these thing...when it comes down to it, I'm ecstatic with my body for keeping up with my bad habits as well as it did. For 30 years, my body has done the absolute best it can with the tools I've given it, and now that I've decided to do a sudden 180 and complete change my habits, it has responded amazingly to everything I've thrown at it. Is it ever going to be perfect in the eyes of society and the media, probably not, but there are very few people that will ever have a perfect body.
I see people like my grandmother who has debilitating rheumatoid arthritis, and love my body even more. Unlike her, my body is not failing me, it's not working against me like hers is. It's repairing years of damage with very little protest.
Our bodies were not designed to handle the bad habits that often leading to being overweight. We are hating our bodies for something it had no control over. I have major stretch marks, but I could have changed my habits before I stretched my skin beyond it's limits, but I didn't. The same thing with the cellulite, the thunder thighs, the hang-over stomach.
At the end of the day, love your body. It's stuck by you through some very trying times and hasn't failed you yet.
I love my body. I love what it is capable of. I love what it allows me to do. I love that it is allowing me to undo what I've done to it. I love that it lets me push it. I love that it gets stronger. I love the muscle my body is building. I love the fat my body is losing. I love that it has allowed me to bear two children.
I do not love the way it looks, but it is allowing me to change that. But I love so many other things about it, so overall, I do love my body.
Our bodies are so much more than the way it looks. I think the trick to begin loving it is to start to love things about it that are beyond the aesthetics.
^ This!
I am not crazy about the state my body is in right now, but I've only got one body, and I have to treat it right if we are going to live well together. I didn't get to pick my genes - it's too bad that my toenails are a little weird, and I have crackly knee joints like an old person, and food goes straight to my midsection - but everyone has imperfections that make them crazier than they should. Knowing that I'm not the only one who judges my body too harshly at times is helpful - everybody struggles with it one way or another.
But the best I can do now, today, is use well the body I have, and treat it with care, because it's the only one I've got. Treat your body the way you want your body to be treated…
Last edited by cornellchick; 06-10-2012 at 08:47 PM.
When I decided to start losing weight, I DID hate the way my body looked. Along the same time I started losing weight I started looking at "chubby fashion" blogs / tumblrs. I saw lots of beautiful ladies that are not only physically beautiful but have the type of confidence that has always eluded me. And doing that really helped me to accept what my body is now - I realized I actually love my curves, even if I just want them to be smaller and be healthier. I'm far off from my goal weight but Ive gained some serious confidence in the past few months and feel so much better emotionally. I bought new clothes, stuff I never would of wore before. Not just jeans and a baggy shirt anymore. Capris, form fitting shirts, I even bought a dress! I actually feel pretty now.
Realizing that you don't have to be skinny or at your goal weight to be beautiful makes life much better. To hate yourself now and all the way until you reach where you want to be, well, you'll probably still be disappointed when you get there.
I think I would revise the 'love your body now' thing to something along the lines of: always treat yourself and your body with respect, honor your body for what it does for you, and love the potential it possesses.
Great point! I don't have to love the way I look right now (and I definitely do have my ups and downs) but I do need to treat my body well, which means improving my habits to be better to myself.
I would say encouraging people not to HATE their bodies is a good (and somewhat realistic) goal. There is so much "I'll never be on the cover of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition so why bother" that goes on, and I wish more people would state health and "looking better" as their primary goals rather than looking "perfect"
Loving yourself is a little different from loving your body. You are much more than what your body looks like. Love WHO YOU ARE because you are totally and utterly worth it.
Loving myself made it all the much easier to lose weight. I always say that hating yourself thin is a horrible way to get there. Things do not magically get better when you're thin.
The first step in loving yourself can be small For me it was something silly—I learned how to properly care for my hair—but it was the first step on a long journey that helped me love who I am.
I can't hate my body. My body is in the state that it is in because of decisions I made, its not like it forced me to be chunky, I made conscious decisions to overeat. I am disappointed in the way I am proportioned, but if I "hate" anything, I hate what I did to my body, but no one is perfect and I treat it a lot better now.
