Congrats Megan! You have had a hard year, maintaining weight loss during it had to be harder still. I'm so happy that you have found what works for you!
I miss the guilt-free freedom and the instant satisfaction of devouring yummy things. Like with most things, it's easy to remember the "good times" fondly while the heart and mind glosses over the "bad times." That's how I remember my old eating habits. Food was like a bad friend but a loyal friend. And my oldest friend. It was never kind to me, but it was always around when I needed it. If I was bored, happy, sad, it was there, and it temporarily and superficially fulfilled whatever need I was feeling at the moment. But there were always consequences, and we all know those too well. As one might miss a friend who had been around forever, even if they weren't a good friend, that's how I miss food.
Great explanation! I understand so much better now I didn't understand from your first post because personally, I look at that old bad friend and say "Good Riddance." and don't miss her one bit. She kept me down for far too long. I'm glad I never have to see her again. But I'm pretty hard-headed like that and of course, everyone is different!
You obviously know yourself very well. Hopefully in time, that friend will be a faded memory, like the "good ol days" of high school and you can remember the time fondly without wishing you could go back.
k8yk - I gained a lot of insight from the book "The End of Overeating" by Dr. David Kessler. He argues that there is a chemical/biological component to overeating for many people, specifically when it comes to combinations of sugar, fat, and salt. His ideas made a lot of sense to me personally, and while they may not apply to everyone, I know that that's an area that I may always struggle with.
I laughed when you said "maintenance is boring" because well, it's true, at least for me.
I shifted my focus to athletic performance. Increasing my strength is NEVER boring and a bad day at the gym seems to have less of an impact than a bad food day, psychologically.
I'm not sad or unhappy, but I am honest with myself.
Being honest about own my feelings is the only way I can properly respond to them.
yes, life is infinitely better and happier and more fulfilling as a maintainer at goal weight
than it ever was when I was eating whatever I wanted and overweight.
But, for the sake of being honest with myself,
it would be useless to deny the fact
that I miss eating whatever I wanted without abandon.
I miss the guilt-free freedom and the instant satisfaction of devouring yummy things.
That's how I remember my old eating habits.
Food was like a bad friend but a loyal friend. And my oldest friend.
It was never kind to me, but it was always around when I needed it.
If I was bored, happy, sad, it was there,
and it temporarily and superficially fulfilled whatever need I was feeling at the moment.
But there were always consequences, and we all know those too well.
As one might miss a friend who had been around forever, even if they weren't a good friend,
that's how I miss food.
Over the nearly two years I've been seriously active about weight control
I have learned how to fulfill my own needs in appropriate healthy ways without food.
And I'm a happier and better person for it.
But I can't deny that part of my brain is still, and probably always will be,
conditioned to remember that instant delicious satisfaction
that eating a pile of junk food used to give me.
And that being said, I DO enjoy my favorite "old" foods from time to time.
I think it's wonderful that some people can comfortably incorporate little treats
into their daily plans. I cannot. Tried it, didn't work.
Even weekly "off plan, but on plan" meals...as in, a within reason restaurant meal, is hard for me.
My brain is too all or nothing to enjoy that strategy.
BUT, and this is definitely a controversial strategy as my method would absolutely not work for most people,
I do allow myself regular free for all days. Once a month, usually.
By the end of the day, I'll be full, wishing I didn't eat so much,
but I'll be satisfied and good to go for another month.
I did this all through weight loss and now all through maintenance,
it hasn't slowed me down yet. It rarely even affects the scale too much.
I'm able to get right back on plan the next day.
So I have found a balance (the struggle is keeping the balance sometimes).
I'm happy with myself and my body and my lifestyle,
but refuse to deny the fact that I have some resentful thoughts.
I don't think those thoughts are abnormal or wrong,
they just need to be addressed and understood.
I do enjoy delicious on plan meals and I have my own unique strategy for allowing myself treats.
Thanks for sharing your Thoughts.
I totally agree with you.
While my own personal Strategy for handling this issue is adaptable,
I can see that your've developed a plan that works for you..
so...CONGRATULATIONS, you are doing it exactly right.
Megan, so glad to hear from you. Sounds like things are going pretty well after returning from your "vacation" that wasn't really a "vacation" was it ?Many of us were so concened for you during that time. Congratulaions on maintaining , both diet and marriage.
I once heard from a women who quit smoking 40 yrs. ago, that if somehow cigarettes were no longer bad for you, she would light up that day. What I am trying to say is that you are SO not alone. Most people who have kicked an addiction or bad habit sometimes feel remorse. What I do, is try to remember the gross feeling I get after eating certain unhealthy foods. For example, since dieting I have lost my taste for candy bars. However I remember the positive emotions I used to feel after downing like four or five. So recently I felt really depressed and I ate candy bars like there was no tomorrow. After, I felt disgusting because it didn't make me happier, it didn't taste as good as I remembered (it tasted waxy and too sugary) and I felt like a fat blob. So I made an effort to remember that feeling and now every time I feel like eating any kind of candy bar I just remember how I felt and the urge passes
I didn't understand from your first post because personally, I look at that old bad friend and say "Good Riddance." and don't miss her one bit. She kept me down for far too long. I'm glad I never have to see her again. But I'm pretty hard-headed like that and of course, everyone is different!
