[Elladorine]

Thank you Texas.

I hope you don't mind me mentioning something that I feel is very important. Be kind to both yourself and your SO. Using the term "fatass," calling yourself pathetic, or saying you're eating like fat *******s is overly-negative. You need to be able to look at yourselves with compassion and acceptance no matter what your weight may be, as in the long run the negativity can hamper not only your potential success, but with your overall happiness.

Hang in there.

[shannonmb]

I agree with Sirenity about being kind to yourself and your SO. You must love yourself deeply to want to do this for yourself, and calling yourself names to try to shame yourself into doing this does not work. Pretend that you are a little girl who you are trying to help lose weight. Would you say, "cmon, fat a**, what is your problem". Of course you wouldn't! So treat yourself with that same respect!

In a perfect world, your man would be on the exact same page with weight loss that you are at all times. But think, say 6 months ago, before you had your mind wrapped around this, would it be so easy for you to decide to change if he all of a sudden came home and said, "Look, this is what we're doing now!". I say try to ease him into it gradually. Start making small substitutions and looking for really tasty but healthy recipes. It's just not fair to tell him, "Okay, I'm ready, so no more McD's or candy for you, even when you're not with me!".

On the other hand, there is no law these days that you have to cook what your man says to cook. In my house, I cook what I cook, and my hubbs and daughter will deal with it. Luckily for them, I've been cooking delicious meals that are extremely healthy, and giving them the little extras like butter on their corn on the cob or pasta or rice as a side dish which I just skip. So it is very possible to serve yourself healthy weight loss foods while still keeping him happy. Might take a little experimenting and research, but for sure possible. And as a bonus, he'll be eating a lot better, too!

Good luck! Sorry so long!

[ablentlinger]

Thanks Pacifica - very inspiring! Good luck on the rest of your journey.

Texas - In the end, you have to do what is right for you. I think walking is PHENOMENAL and you are moving. Who cares how you are moving. My dh is similar to yours. Junk, meat and potatoes, etc. I slowly started changing little things in our dinners...things he wouldn't/still hasn't noticed. (I've even been known to put light sour cream in a regular sour cream container. LOL) I'm sure your relationship is great and no one can make a judgement on that. I wish you the best of luck on your journey! Keep it up girl. The fact that you are here says you are wanting to change your life!

[Torister]

Originally Posted by Texas1206

Didn't know my S/O's lack of willpower with food would trigger someone to question my relationship with him. But that's alright, I know he'll love me even if we're too poor to eat. So I know that isn't the issue and we obviously have more things in common than eating like fat *******s.

Yikes. Guess I missed that post.

I feel badly that you refer to yourself and your SO with such negativity. Even at my heaviest when I felt the worst I have ever felt physically (and I am in my 40's), I never referred to myself that way. Even joking about it...its still negative...and it does affect you. You and your SO are worth more than that.

JMO for whatever that is worth........

[gggirls]

I remember some wise chick telling me at the beginning of this journey -

We take care of the things we love.

(It may have been Torister as she is one of my heroes). That simple statement has stuck with me for the nearly 3 years I've been on this journey. This truly is about you - sure it helps to have support at home but I was never force fed. I also have a fit, active DH - sometimes he needs to add things to his meals - sometimes he needs a snack I don't keep in the house - he is really good about doing this mostly during times when we're not together. He doesn't care what size I am but he does care about my happiness - as the lifestyle changes continue we are both amazed.

As for the how - I started with baby steps - my first "rule" was no more drive thru - if I wanted fast food that was fine - but I had to get out of the car and go in - I knew myself well enough to know I wouldn't do that. Nearly 3 years later I have not had fast food.

I would also encourage you to lose the "diet" mindset. Embrace healthy choices and a healthier you.

I can't wait to hear more - take care of yourself!

[renstwin]

In regards to your knees. I too have bad knees from years of being obese. My right knee is especially crunchy. I have been doing Leslie Sansone's WATP since January. It does not hurt my knees. There is no jumping in them or getting up and down off the ground.

I have lost over 50 pounds with these DVD's. The more I lose the less my knees hurt.

Best wishes to you and welcome to the site.

[Torister]

Originally Posted by gggirls

(It may have been Torister as she is one of my heroes).

You are just too sweet!