I believe this is exactly what happened to me, and that years of yo-yo'ing up and down finally got me all the way up the scale to the size I am today.

Hugs to you, Carol, from another empty-nester.
My daughter and her family never lived more than fifteen minutes away, until they moved to Florida this summer. Now that they aren't around any more, I feel very empty, at loose ends, and miss them terribly.

As for diets, something has just clicked off in me about them lately. I can't tell you how many hours I've spent (wasted?) reading diet message boards, trying to get motivated and inspired to take off the weight "once and for all", and it never worked.

The last couple of months, I just can't get into reading the boards like I used to. I have no desire to follow whatever plans are written about on them. This is my favorite area of the board here, and I don't check the other areas of the boards often any more.

I'm just DONE with diets, absolutely and completely. The less brain space that eating, food, the scale, and weight loss take up in my brain, the better I like it. It's such a waste of time, effort, and money.

I'm not trying to do by-the-book IE any more either, simply because I'm trying to let food and eating occupy a natural place in my life. I'm trying not to force anything, just let things fall into place as they will.

I think I'd like to gently nudge myself in the direction of a little more physical activity, and aim for more fruits and vegetables, for the sake of health only, but I'm not going to make a formal "program" out of those efforts.

Oh, here's one more thing I noticed--I've been wearing comfortable, long skirts this summer because in them I kept cooler than if I was wearing my jeans. One day last week it cooled off a lot here and I wore my jeans, but they cut into my waist all day, and I couldn't wait to change out of them that night. I realized that the tightness of the waist kept me focused on food, eating, and weight that day, and I didn't like it, so I think, for me anyway, wearing COMFORTABLE clothes, no matter what they are, is going to be a key thing to help me. As long as my waistbands aren't cutting into me, I'm not focused on all those other things.

Enjoy your weekend, everyone!

Quiet weekend in this thread.

Just wanted to check in. I've been doing well up until today. Ate some crackers when I got the munchies and that triggered a mini-binge that included a bunch of candy and carrots. What a combo! I was hungry when dinner time came and overate the spaghetti I made. It is one of my weaknesses. I'm feelin' it now. ugh! Needless to say I don't think I'll be putting anymore food in my mouth tonite, so tomorrow is another day! Back at it!

How's everyone doing?

Blue, isn't it interesting how that full feeling really bothers us now? Becky, I"ve read on other IE sites about the comfortable clothes. I get so excited when clothes I haven't worn for awhile are now comfortable, I still tend towards wearing too tight things but I'm learning. I was gone over the weekend and eating was good. I can't believe how picky I"m getting. If it doesn't taste good I just don't eat it and usually find something else that I like. We were at a a Bible conference where all the food is provided and sometimes it's good and sometimes not. One thing that bothers me is when food that should be hot is luke warm. But I go by just fine and had a great piece of chocolate pie. Even desserts from caterers can be less than desirable but this pie was awesome.

It was a pretty quiet week end around here. I found a website I had put back into favorites that I got somewhere here on 3FC I think it is called DIY(doityourself)diet. I found it quite interesting and easy to use with my IE not as a diet, but sort of a guideline to see how I can eat the things I like and not feel guilty while learning the transition from dieting to total IE. Her idea is that if we don't eat what we like and only eat what a diet says you must eat that you will not stick with a diet. Boy do I relate to that. I wouldn't want to follow it as a diet because I don't want to journal etc. I just don't want to go that route any more as it keeps you thinking about food all the time. However, as I checked out some things I felt would go along with IE I was surprised at what foods that I really like to eat especially when eating fast food isn't such bad choices if you do it wisely. I am really learning to enjoy IE. We ate out yesterday and and using the guidelines, I thoroughly enjoyed it. Even after I came home, I ate what I wanted to eat throughout the day and I was satisfied and probably ate much less than I usually do. Not having to eat a certain amount of points/calories each day and eating when I want, what I want and the amount I do want really takes the edge off. Still struggling to stop thinking "diet" though. I find that I to have actually stop and remind myself by saying out loud to myself, "I am not on a diet". I guess that will take a while after actually dieting for so many years. I know I didn't diet until I was in my 20's, but it sure seems like I've done it forever. Just have to keep doing it... One day at a time and one step at a time.

It has really taken me a long time to not think "healthy foods". Now I eat whatever and haven't felt this good in a long time. Gwen Shamblin's book The Weigh Down Diet really is good about explaining that point. I just went over it again recently. One point she makes (try just go forget about all the hot water she has been in recent years) is that it is the AMOUNT of food we eat not the type, that causes trouble and dieting causes us to eat greater amounts of certain foods. We then go back to eating whatever (when we're off the diet) and gain weight and feel sluggish because of the excess calories we are taking in.

I always knew chocolate had to be good for you but I still don't think most people really believe it.

A Dark Chocolate a Day Keeps the Doctor Away
Daily Dark Chocolate Good for the Heart, Loaded With Flavonoids
By Daniel J. DeNoon
WebMD Health NewsHere's news that's hard not to like. Eating a small, 1.6-ounce bar of dark chocolate every day is good for you. Very good for you, find Mary Engler, PhD, RN, of the University of California, San Francisco, and colleagues.

Now here is a medical experiment you would love to volunteer for. Engler's team divided 21 healthy adults into two groups. One group got a Dove Dark Chocolate bar every day for two weeks. Like other dark chocolate bars with high-cocoa content, this one is loaded with something called epicatechin. Epicatechin is a particularly active member of a group of compounds called plant flavoniods. Flavoniods keep cholesterol from gathering in blood vessels, reduce the risk of blood clots, and slow down the immune responses that lead to clogged arteries.
The second group that didn't get Dove bars wasn't totally left out. They, too, got dark chocolate bars. But their treats had the flavoniods taken out.

All subjects underwent high-tech evaluation of how well the blood vessels dilate and relax -- an indictor of healthy blood vessel function. Blood vessel stiffness indicates diseased vessels and possible atherosclerosis. Those who got the full-flavonoid chocolate did significantly better. Why? Blood tests showed that high levels of epicatechin were coursing through their arteries.

"This is the longest clinical trial to date to show improvement in blood vessel function from consuming flavonoid-rich dark chocolate daily over an extended period of time," Engler says in a news release. "It is likely that the elevated blood levels of epicatechin triggered the release of active substances that ... increase blood flow in the artery. Better blood flow is good for your heart."



Why Dark Chocolate Is Different
Not all chocolate is created equal. Dark chocolate contains a lot more cocoa than other forms of chocolate. And standard chocolate manufacturing destroys up to half of the flavoniods. But chocolate companies have now learned to make dark chocolate that keeps up to 95% of its flavoniods.

Sure, this seems like a scam. Can't you get more and better flavoniods from other foods? Surprisingly, the answer is "not really." Engler says that dark chocolate

"Many people don't realize that chocolate is plant-derived, as are the fruits and vegetables recommended for a healthy heart," Engler says.

While a little dark chocolate is good, a lot is not better. Chocolate still is loaded with calories. If you're going to eat more chocolate, you'll have to cut back somewhere else. And remember that a balanced diet -- and plenty of exercise -- is still the key to heart health.

Sounds like an excuse to add dark chocolate to my next shopping list! muhahaha!

I have developed a taste for dark chocolate and eat a 100 cal bar everyday. I always loved the Dove dark chocolate, but switched to the 100 calorie bar. I wonder if the Dove is the best. I love knowing it is clearing out my arteries. Wahoo!!! Finally a sweet that is really good for us.

Well, here it is october 1st...and all last night I was in a panic about which diet I was going to start this month! Im just at a loss with them. I was low carbing and it just blew up in my face getting me right back to where I started. Too boot, I have painful heel spurs which really limits excercise for me. Im on my feet at work 9-12 hours a day, so the last thing I want to do is walk more. I'll try to do some bike riding. Ive got to try IE and hope I can get this dieting mentality out of my head. I am so hung up on trying to eat many small meals throughout the day to "keep my metabolism running high" and of course im a slave to the scale jumping on twice a day.

This is a very scary cliff to be standing on the edge of..but I think I'll jump in

Glad you're jumping in, Tigerseye. It is really difficult after years of dieting to get out of that way of thinking. Even though I"ve been doing IE for about 2 yr., only in the last 4 mo. had I got it into my head that there are no good or bad foods. It's hunger and satisfaction for me. I don't know if there is a connection but lately I've felt better than I have in a long time. I really love chocolate and have been googling to find out its benefits. I know, however, if you eat too much of a food you will get really tired of it. I used to love honey roasted almonds but I haven't bought a can in several months.

I've got the book and I'm reading it. I'm using it to start transitioning towards maintenance, even though I'm still losing. I'm not jumping in head first, but I am starting to change. I haven't counted any calories for 3 weeks or so - not because of Intuitive Eating, just because I got tired. But it's kinda nice. I do find the writing to be a little to repetitive and self-helpy, but some good stuff in there.

More good news about chocolate from the BBC,

Chocolate may be better for your health than tea because it contains more of a chemical that could prevent cancer and heart disease, researchers have said.


The BBC's Karen Allen reports: "Having chocolate with a cup of tea does you good"
The findings follow earlier research revealing that moderate chocolate consumption offers health benefits.

The new research measures the amount of catechins - the chemical thought to be behind the benefits - in different types of chocolate.

The substance is also found in tea - leading the researchers to recommend a cup of tea with a chocolate biscuit as one way to help maintain good health.

Chemical diet

The researchers, from Holland's National Institute of Public Health and Environment, published their findings in The Lancet medical journal.

Dr Ilja Arts and colleagues examined the chemical compounds in a range of foods and discovered that catechins are found in chocolate.

Up until now tea was thought to contain the largest amount but the new research indicates that dark chocolate has four times as many.

Catechins are believed to protect against heart disease and cancer and so eating products that contain them could have health benefits.

In the UK, where more than £3.5bn is spent on chocolate each year - the research is likely to be welcomed by those with a sweet tooth although dentists may be less pleased.

Tea and biscuits

Dark chocolate had 53.5mg of catechins per 100g, milk chocolate contained 15.9mg per 100g, and the black tea infusion contained only 13.9mg per 100ml.

In a later survey, the researchers found that in a sample of 6250 men and women, tea was the most important source of catechins, accounting for 55% of total intake.

Chocolate contributed to 20% of the total intake of catechins.

The researchers said: "Drinking a cup of tea and eating a chocolate cookie might be not only enjoyable but healthy as well."

Hi Julie, I think IE is the way to go. I tried the calorie counting (again) and I just couldn't do it either. I've got to have freedom to be me! I think IE will be good for maintaining, too. Paying attention to your hunger/full signals is key! Best of luck to you! You're well on your way!

Welcome Tigerseye!

Good find Carol! And I like the kudos they give tea in this article. I love me some tea! Most days that's all I drink.

IE is going very well for me overall. I am pleased. This feels like last year when I lost weight eating this way. I have hope! Only this time, Lord willing, I'm not going to go back to bad eating habits and gain it all back before losing it all!

Hi, guys. Back from diet land, and, I just can't do it, but, I guess I had to find that out for myself. I guess if I diet, I get completely consumed with other things than disturbing emotional issues. Anyway, I need to stick with this because, for the first time, I feel normal around food. Very depressed, because I want the quick weight loss. I need to start trusting myself. Off to go sing, now.
Amie

Same thing here...Knowing that today was the start of a "fresh month", I ate like a fiend all the stuff I knew I needed to get rid of because I was going to start low carbing today. BIG SIGH---will we EVER break this cycle of going on and off "diets"? I *thought* I was thoroughly done with diets, with the desire to diet, etc., but the desperation caused by "feeling fat" does me in every time.

To make matters worse, I agreed with a couple of my sisters this morning to try to lose 13 pounds (starting today, because it's a new month, lol), one for each week left of the year. Of course, this requires lots of "tips" on how to "eat healthy" from the sister who means very well, but who loses MUCH easier and faster than I do.

So I dutifully did what I always seem to do lately: opened my food journal notebook to a new page, wrote in my weight and waist measurement, then started logging my food for the day. I also started the day with a low carb breakfast and lunch.

That's as far as I made it with that. I just made a batch of cookies to have some of later. I just can't---or should I say, I just WON'T---stick to a low carb diet.

I can still try to lose 13 pounds by the end of the year. It just won't be with a diet.