I have been posting here nearly every day since early February and as anyone who has been with this group that long knows about me is that my food plan has evolved and is continuing to evolve. I also belong to Biggest Loser Club online. I follow their diet experts recommended calories and nutrient breakdown which is what I have been posting here lately since I am in a Food Accountability Challenge over there. I also have 16 years with OA. I began incorporating the Beck behavioral principles since April 1st of this year. All of these elements are working together to assist me in losing weight in a "healthy manner", which my definition is on all levels: physically, emotionally, behaviorally and spiritually.

I don't feel that I actively sabotage my weight lose efforts at the level that Dr. Beck addresses in her two books. My understanding is that as you gain more mastery over your behavior with all kinds of foods, you then make the decision how you will incorporate that both in weight lose but also eventually in maintenance. I feel I am at more intermediate level than some of the basic skills offered in her initial book. I do have the second one but I haven't read it yet.

Since I am beyond some of the "basic" behavioral skills like sitting down while eating, mindfully eating, eating slowly, awareness of physical vs emotional hunger, not eating to solve non-food issues; to name, the major ones; I am expanding on these on my own. I clearly empathize with those of you here who are at a different level than I am. I will assure you that there will come a day when you will have your own epiphany about what blocks you from having a "normal" relationship with food. Right now, all of that seems very mechanical to me. Thank God, because it means that I can move on and take all of this "to the sky". I am very excited about this whole process and what lies ahead.

Back in the spring, I was involved in a Food Challenge where we had to consciously eat different kinds of vegetables and fruit. At that time, I decided to go "no sugar". I was no sugar for 6 weeks. No deviation. I bought a lot of no sugar food products as "substitutes". As a person who has been gifted with the love of cooking and the love of good tasting food, it was heresy to accept food that was chemically engineered to "pass". I have a family history of diabetes and my blood glucose (at my heaviest) was pre-diabetic. I didn't play around with that health concern. So, I have made a compromise that seems to work for me---for now. I allow myself on occasion some foods with sugar in them. If tomorrow, I discovered that in spite of the weight lose I have had and the healthy food plan I follow I have developed diabetes, then I would have no problem whatsoever returning to no sugar. Period. I truly can say I Eat to Live not Live to Eat.

I am not upset with either of your comments, thoughts or questions, Val and Robin. I realize that you are in a place that I plan to be in about 14 months--maintenance. Eating a whole pie at one sitting probably is not in your "game plan". I honestly believe that it will from time to time be in mine, yes, even in my maintenance.This time next year who knows how I may view that choice I made that day. Today I am okay with it. Time will tell.

For 11/28

Calories: 2297
Carbs: 304
Fat: 60
Protein: 112
Fiber: 21
Sodium: 2992

The #1 Beck Skill that I am working on right now is "Enriching My Life". That, and I am behind (by 4 pair) on buying my shoes for every #5 lost. I need to get moving on both.

Pam

Coaches/Buddies, I had to make several substitutions to my food plan today. But, I am pleased with the adjustments I chose, even though I went over my planned calories for the day.

Yesterday/Today’s Essentials:
Weigh-in: -1.5 lbs.
Read Advantage Cards two times: no
Read Response Cards at least two times: no
Ate slowly, sitting down, noticing every bite: somewhat - we need to stop eating in front of the TV
Gave myself credit when I engaged in helpful eating behaviors: yes
Did spontaneous exercise: yes
Did planned exercise: none planned
Wrote out food plan for tomorrow: not yet
Tracked today’s food: yes
Left food on my plate: NO!
Ate only to normal fullness: a little too full from dinner, but not stuffed
Identified and responded to a self-deluding thought: yes

BillBlueEyes, great job on the ham restraint!! It must feel great looking back at the old days of how you used to behave.

GardenerJoy, congratulations on reaching your writing goal. I had hoped (about a year ago) I’d spend November writing my dissertation, but that is looking more like May now. I’ll have to channel your inspiration then! Great job handling the unexpected meal out.

HollyP, great doctors do make a big difference when your in pain. Great job planning your food too!

MapLover, great job getting your workout in! That makes such a big difference in my appetite.

Maryann, your grace in compliment accepting made me smile tonight! Great for you!!

Onebyone, sound like you are on the right track!

PamatGA, I really like your insights!

Tazzy, sounds like you are doing great with exercise! Congratulations!

Va1erie, great job getting in the exercise today!

Coaches and new friends,

well, sort of frustrated that the lbs arent just dropping off like I thought they would but i do have to give myself more time than a week, but have been dieting hard core and tracking I do feel like some one mentioned (maplover) about weight loss and dieting. Been at this for years. I am so tired of hearing its just muscle!

Wondering what you all think about eating off plan. So i plan my menu, and today at work there was catered lunch (and is 2x/wk) and i had my lunch and then at 2 pm i was hungry and wanted a small plate of something healthy. So I had it. Now was I starving? No, hungry? Maybe. And I toyed with NOT eating anything but didnt want my protein shake either. So that was off plan, as was the hot cheesy breadstick that came out of the oven with the pizza for the kids. Does that mean I didnt follow my plan? Suppose so.... Darn

Read cards today. Twice
Did resist alot of temptations during the day, credit myself for that
Had to not exercise today after yesterdays beating!
No unplanned exc
Sat for all meals And ate mindfully
Left some food behind. (a few bites of apple)

Thats about it! So interesting reading everyones journey
Im open to any/all suggestions!

Holly

I had an extra slice of bread today, but resisted another. I was home alone which is a trigger for me, but it also meant I could talk aloud to myself which was effective. If a little strange.

Lots of exercise today because I'm not sure how much time I'll have tomorrow--surely I can find at least 15 minutes!

WI: +0.15kgs, Exercise:+75 1285/1300 minutes for November, Food: 80%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

Hollyp: My reading of Beck is that if you didn't write it down when you were making your plan, then eating that food is off plan. And, really, that's one of the more useful skills I developed.
One of the reasons that I rate a percentage of on plan is that it eventually became a little too black and white for me. I manage 100% on plan sometimes -- and, I push myself to do it more often when I'm frustrated at the scale or I'm having problems engaging in some of the behaviors that I know work. Often, I manage 90% which is how I score it when I substitute something on my plan for something equivalent nutritionally and calorically.

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Felt a strong urge to eat in the morning, but recognized that I wasn't hungry, wasn't interested in a particular food, and it wasn't near a regular meal or snack time. So I countered it, CREDIT moi, with a reminder that I'd like to remain wearing my current pair of jeans without that ugly path of buying a larger size and having limited choices when getting dressed each morning. Remainder of the day was on plan without incident, CREDIT moi.

In the evening I walked with DW (CREDIT moi) to see the movie Hugo. I was taken; just loved it, despite knowing that all the critics raved over it, LOL. It has lovely views of Paris and two fine young actors (14 year olds playing younger kids).


onebyone – Neat that you're staying on your WW plan. Hope you enjoy all that walking to see the Xmas Craft Show. Hope it inspires you to participate next year.

Joy (gardenerjoy) – Neat that you know that home alone is a trigger so that you're prepared to counter the Sabotaging Thoughts and temptations. I don't think talking to oneself is weird - just getting caught, LOL.

FutureFitChick – Kudos for "Identified and responded to a self-deluding thought" - I worry about how many of those I entertain without being aware.

Pam (pamaga) – Yay for "Enriching My Life." It is beyond my comprehension the thought of buying four pair of shoes - perhaps a male limitation, LOL. But wish you well at having at it.

Val (va1erie) – Yep, Ouch for a snackfest but with Kudos for just moving forward.

Hollyp – Would seem to me that eating in response to hunger in order to get sleep seems like a good idea. Perhaps when you design your eating plan you can take into account that you are prone to night hunger and plan for it.

It's a challenge to design a plan that includes twice a week lunch provided by others. A challenge, but doable. Seems to me that planning a snack of healthy foods just to get the head back on the path might be a good plan. That "hot cheesy breadstick" would seem like a good item to consciously plan to completely avoid - just to keep the head clear. I hate, hate, hate that items like that are designed to smell so tempting.


Readers -

Thanks for the insight, gang. There's a lot of good wisdom to absorb here. I am trying to just take it one day at a time (sound familiar to some?) and not rush ahead thinking I know everything, or that there are things I don't have to do. For example, one of the things I did not do the last time with Beck was to really get a coach and be honest about how I was following the program consistently.

Reading chapter 4 of the pink book (I think--the first book), I like the way she talks about needing the skills to make the diet work before starting the diet. That makes a lot of sense.

Working from home today, good to know from gardnerjoy that this can be a trigger.

Hi Everyone,

Have had a couple of good days, read cards, ate slowly, mindfully, weighed and measured everything, avoided treats my co-worker gave me for a holiday gift (the kids enjoyed the baking!), have boot camp tonight. I found these last couple of days that I didn't need my snack in the morning. Kept on working right past the time I would generally have it. Not going to question why. Scale is down again. I had a goal to get to 165 by our cruise on Feb 12 and I'm pretty sure I can meet that with 3.8 pounds to lose in 72 days (and yes I am counting down every day!).

Back to a mountain of paperwork on my desk. Happy Wednesday!

Bill, when I told Paul that I was "behind" in getting my pair of shoes(plural), Paul just smiled and said "Yes, I know!!" That is when I love him the absolute most!! Have you never seen "Sex and the City"? When Paul was gone on his retreat, the first night (even though I was sooooo sick) I sat down and watched "Sex and the City 2" on t.v. Besides loving men, there are just some of us "of the female persuasion" that love our shoes. I just wish I were an octopus!!

Side note: For those of you who are new here, in the first Beck book, she mentions about finding a non-food way to "reward" yourself as you accomplish and meet your Beck goals, especially losing weight. Since Dr. Beck stresses every 5# lose,and I just love shoes, I jumped at the "excuse" (as if I really needed one!) to reward myself. I watch the scales and as I see myself moving towards that next 5#, I start checking all of the online shoe sites for my next "spoils".

P.S. Also, I have decided that my goal weight photo is not going to be of me in some of my former tent-size clothes (they are now long gone) but a photo shoot of me surrounded by all of the new pair of shoes that I bought during my journey down the scales. I will probably even have it professionally matted and framed too.

HollyP as you can see what and how each of us "defines" On Plan is a combination of finding out what works for each of us specifically and what is the "conventional wisdom". As Dr. Beck says in her first book, when you start out using her principles, choose two diet plans so when one ceases to seem to be effective you can go to Plan B. My On Plan is a hybrid of basic "common sense" of Nutrition 101 with calorie counting so I am actually controlling my portions (yes, you can stay fat eating healthy if you are eating like a lumberjack!). Currently, if I am losing weight, I feel I am eating On Plan.

In the first book, there is a short chapter on Plateaus that is also a good yardstick that I use: weight gain under two weeks is probably due to hormones, too many calories or sodium or being a coach potato; weight gain over two weeks is something you need to step back and take a long look at what you have been doing. As I have learned this past year. There is really only one hard and fast rule about losing weight: if you want to lose weight, you have to eat less or burn more calories.

Since I want to end up being in good general health when I arrive at my destination, it does mean that I have certain "rules" that I follow. On another site I belong to (Biggest Loser Club online), we have Buddy Challenges day and night. There are also challenges on this site if you like to do that (just look under the general directory to find one). In October, I did a Challenge called "Keys to Successful Weight Lose".

Well, we got points for ticking off certain essential keys in losing weight. Prior to this challenge, one area I was not so attentive to was making sure I got my healthy fats in every day. Why is this a "big deal"? Well, our internal organs need a percentage to perform well. Our hair, skin and nails need it to maintain that "glow or grow" we ladies like. I will admit that I had to relinquish some of my former saved up calories for other favorite foods so I could restart cooking with olive oil or making peace with the "nut" [only having an ounce!] but I realized that I don't want to be a balding dried up old prunewhen I get down to my goal weight.

So, as time goes on and I learn new things that I need to consider incorporating in my food plan, I tweak my On Plan to accommodate that. I think over time you will find yourself doing that as well.

Well, for everyone else, have a good day, I am busy in the kitchen today and I have to check on "what's cooking"! Yum! Yum!


Pam

Hi all, patamga (think i spelled that wrong so sorry). Thanks for your thoughts. I am so frustrated today, up a lb again, why did I get on that scale? I am going to see a nutritionist and a hormone doc in Jan for any insight I can get. I exercise tons, eat very clean, 2 tsp evoo daily and enough protein. Im walking at work all day, and all the basic labs are NL including thyroid. Im not on any meds that can prevent loss and am just so sad today. Nibbling is pretty much 99 percent under control and the diet plan Im following right now is like yours, eating healthy,clean,small portions, 4x/day, minimal sweets. I read about everyone losing weight and I cant believe I cant make that scale move. I hate to whine. The only time I weighed less was when I was a competitor doing double cardios and weight training for an hour! I cant keep that lifeatyle! I cant work out more than I do now, and I waffle between cutting more cals and going into starvation mode and eating above 1300 cals

Thanks for listening, I still love the beck principals and will use them no mtter what my weight because they are so positive!

Holly

Dear all,

I posted here two weeks ago saying I was looking for a diet buddy to begin Stage 1 of the Beck Diet for Life and got no response. It occurs to me that perhaps that is not how this forum works. However, I do not see anywhere on this site that explains how the Beck Diet forum support works. Please let me know if we are acting as group buddies or how I can have the kind of diet buddy support that Beck recommends by using this forum.

Thanks much,

BB

I met my exercise goal and finished the 50,000 words for NaNoWriMo. Yay!

WI: +0.1kgs, Exercise:+15 1300/1300 minutes for November, Food: 85%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

Hollyp: Did you tell us how you chose your goal weight? I just checked your stats in the government's BMI calculator (http://www.nhlbisupport.com/bmi/) and, according to that, you are well into a healthy range of weight. Your goal weight is in the healthy range, too, so no worries about aiming too low, but maybe your body and your lifestyle are best suited to your current weight. What about declaring yourself at goal weight and using Beck to maintain it there? Maybe your scale frustration is trying to tell you that the weight you are is the weight you are meant to be.

Bellabruna: We're group buddies! That's worked great for me -- there's a lot of collective wisdom here. I try to report every day and the forum means I can do it at whatever time is convenient to me. You might also want to take a look at another thread in this same section about working the solution from scratch. Nelia and some others are working through the pink book together which might appeal to you as you get started.

my report: My weight was down .6 on Monday, up .2 yesterday, no change this morning. Have eaten consistently OP each day, sitting down, enjoying every bite. Had a personal training session yesterday and one today. Did not read my cards. Missed contacting my diet buddies for two days in a row due to my insane schedule. Got a shipment of Nutrisystem food on Monday, including those desserts that were my go-to food for my last binge, but have been fine with eating just one each night, knowing that tomorrow I'll get the chance to savor another one!

FutureFitChick, I love the idea of renting a home in neutral territory for family gatherings. It wouldn't be practical for everyone, certainly, but I think it would go a long way toward breaking habitual patterns and easing the tension of any dysfunctional family dynamics.

Lexxiss, I totally understand your discomfort in sharing photos of yourself. My family never took any photos at all, so I don't even have any pictures of my high school, college, or Ph.D. graduations! My strongest memory of a photo is a traumatic one: when I brought home my 8th grade school picture, my mother threw it across the room, screaming, "Do you think I really want a reminder of what you look like?" So pictures and I have had a rocky relationship, at best! I try now to look at photos of myself objectively to see evidence of how far I have come and to celebrate that, but it's hard.

maplover, good for you for recognizing that you sometimes overeat as a way of procrastinating on returning to work. That chapter in Beck really resonated with me, too, and, since reading that, I have recognized repeatedly just how often I want to continue to eat simply because I don't want to do whatever is next on my agenda.

Hollyp, your exercise plan for Wednesday is downright awe-inspiring! With the amount of muscle you must be building, and considering how little weight you have to lose, it is not surprising that your weight is not dropping as quickly as you had hoped. Try to focus on the skills you are building, the habits you are changing, and the mindset you are cultivating--and the weight will take care of itself.

Pam, I have a close friend who thinks that I have become "anorexic" and "obsessive" about my weight, and she gently nudges me about it every time we speak. I absolutely believe that her concern is genuine and that she has my best interests at heart. And yet I also know that she is dead wrong, and so her "concern" merely alienates me. I feel completely misunderstood and unfairly pathologized. And I feel angry that, by turning my weight loss (of which I am very proud) into a "problem", she is trying to rob me of my accomplishment and failing utterly to recognize how hard I have worked to get to a place of such self-acceptance, joy, and health. How dare she? The result is that I just don't even try to explain myself to her anymore, and I avoid any reference to my eating, exercising, or weight when I speak to her. What I am trying to say is that I realized the other day that, by my well-intentioned (I promise!) critique of your food choices, I was putting you in exactly the same no-win position that my well-intentioned friend has put me in. And for that I am sincerely sorry. BTW, I think it is great that you have started a photo journal to record your journey, and I LOVE the idea of taking your goal photo surrounded by all the pairs of shoes you bought as rewards along the way! That's a much more powerful visual reminder than my little charm bracelet!

Val, I am impressed beyond measure that you so successfully navigated your way through TWO buffets at the wedding!!! And what was my head swirling about? Oh, the usual stuff, like work and my endless to-do list. And MEN!!

Maryann, what a wonderful compliment your friend gave you when she credited yoga for "keeping you in such great shape"!! That is definitely a moment you should record for your memory box!

onebyone, I hope you really enjoyed that craft show. What a terrific way to get some spontaneous exercise!!

Tazzy, I would say you've got that goal of losing 3.8 more pounds before your cruise IN THE BAG!

bellaruna, we don't have individual diet buddies; we all serve that function for each other. So just jump right in!

Time for me to get to bed. Hope everyone has a great OP day tomorrow!

Had to work late tonight, so just a quick check in. Didn't get food planned for today, so I was pretty far off track, but didn't go crazy. Putting it behind me and will do the best I can in the next few very busy days.

I know that later today there will probably be a December thread, but i had to do my morning check in so that I won't forget.

Got my advantage card done. This time i am being simple:

1) improve health for old age
2) feel better about myself
3) Not feel so self conscious,

I have also set up a system on my iPhone to remind me to read them

Robin Not fun when your friend is constantly harping on your weight. Why do we just feel free to make comments about another's body. Love the idea of rewarding yourself (via pamatga

Please join us as this discussion continues on

Beck Diet For Life/Solution – December 2011 – Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach

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List of Monthly Beck Threads for Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach

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