Hi Becksters - coaches/buddies...

Yesterday was a healthy day....I am always grateful for that! I've been working some more on my taxes. I am self employed...so, it's kind of a pain. But, managable, of course. Last night I was feeling frustrated, anxious and a bit of pain. I have a hard time taking pain meds...nsaids have given me an ulcer in the past - so, I try to manage just taking them when absolutely necessary. Usually I take arthritis tylenol and use ice. Anyway...I was having difficulty last night. I was scrounging around the kitchen and had a hand full of DH's sesame sticks. I fought with myself about putting them in my mouth....how good I know they taste. Then I was willing to think about oh well, no choice and the anti craving techniques. I threw them in the trash. CREDIT!!!! Every single day I write down all the anti-craving techniques in my journal - I have them memorized by now. For me, it's always been about willingness - I am grateful that I was willing to use them.

credits
feel fullness - working on it (I am trying to follow those bites down to my tummy to feel any fullness
ate seated, no seconds, fork down between bites
read arc/rc - one time
looked at beck book
redid a response card
left a bite of food with meals and snackx
gave credit a few times
used anti craving techniques
planned food
reading about preparing for travel.

oops -
no exercise
no spontaneous exercise
changed my night time snack
working on eating slower

I don't have time now to do the personals. I hope to come back later. Have a Beck Day!

Thank you for all your support and friendship.

Coaches/Buddies:
I'm going to try plowing forward. Later today I will work on making a schedule. I feel a lot of resistance to this because following a set schedule will be one more thing I "should" be doing. I don't do well with "should"s, I rebel So, I may need to structure things more loosely, I'll see. Today is going well so far. I woke up at 5 am to exercise and I feel fantastic both that I woke up to do it and because I feel good from the workout.
I've also given myself credit for the good things I've done so far
Today is day 1 of quitting smoking (again!- I've stupidly let myself think I can have an occasional cigarette-- I'm done for good now!)

I'm on a lunch break at work right now, so it's difficult to really figure out how I want to handle this. I would like to get to some personals right now.

Since it's been so long, I'm just going to look at yesterday's posts until now.

Beverlyjoy:

Kudos to you for preparing for your trip. Is it a vacation?

BillBlueEyes:

Yeah for walking in the rain! I remember when you got your rain gear and I also remember the time you didn't walk because of the rain and I reminded you that you had purchased rain gear I really love doing any activity in the rain!

ChinaMaine:

Glad you had such a nice Saturday... I'm very impressed with your consistency of the "good" things.

Shepherdess:

Yeah for your long-run in perfect weather! I'm planning on re-joining one of the running groups I've belonged to in the past. I find that I just don't have enough motivation to do it entirely on my own.
It sounds like you have a good plan for getting yourself back on track-- don't forget to give yourself credit for all the great things you are doing!

Gardnerjoy:

Good point about taking breaks! Let us know how that Response Card works for you. Again, thanks for all the help, I really appreciate it!

FutureFitChick:

Thank you so much for your really sweet response. Of course, it always helps to know I'm not alone How did you get a concussion and I hope you're okay!

hikergirl:

Sounds like you're headed in the right direction! Hopefully we can continue to motivate one another. Thanks for all your reminders and support! Oh and I appreciated the information on restrained eater vs. natural eater, thank you.

onebyone:

Although things have been difficult lately, you're still here posting, examining your thoughts and moving along-- kudos to you for that and all the good things you are doing. I can't wait to read your post about buying a pair of size 16 jeans

That's all I can do for now. Hope to be back later.

THANK YOU for all your support and good vibes. I got them right away! Today at therapy I got the news that I'm not responsible for anyone else's feelings, good or bad, and that its too much of a burden to carry all that and it doesn't work anyway, so its a wasted effort. Kind of like eating, hoping that it will take away the hurt, or fill the emptiness. etc etc. That doesn't work either. So what's left for self-medicating? Or is that a hinderance to real relating? I guess that is what I am trying to deal with: self-medicating and the sterile world of that, either over eating or any kind of over indulging vs real relationships. hmmmmm.
Saw the Last Station this evening with friends. It was very therapeutic: about marriage aka War and Peace. It makes sense going through a midlife crisis. I guess Tolstoy and his Countess (Plummer and Mirren) were in midlife crises for many a year, together. The machinations! I cried. We all cried. Cathartic. I hope to respond to your sharing soon... much love to you all in the meantime.

The Good
- Throughout the day, I identified satisfaction vs fullness while eating, and I stopped eating when satisfied – credit!
- Throughout the day, I identified hunger vs non-hunger before I ate – credit!
- Eat mindfully, enjoying every bite – credit!
- Tolerated non-hunger without eating – credit!
- Used resistance techniques – yes!
- Give credit throughout the day for every positive eating behavior – credit!
- Spontaneous exercise – credit!
- I posted here – yes!

The Bad, and the Ugly
- Read the pink book – nope

Future Fit Chick Kudos for eating slowly and mindfully!

Susan (hikergirl) Yay that sanity has returned to your eating! Yep it’s been over a year that I’ve been doing Beck.

shepherdess Bravo for ‘hunger is not an emergency’ – that really impresses me! By default I still think hunger is an emergency – and it takes real effort to convince myself otherwise. About the checklist – it’s why I started adding the list to my daily posts – because otherwise I let things slip but think I’m doing the plan…

CeeJay It’s an interesting idea to eat a small amount of sweets occasionally to keep binges at bay. It seems a reasonable idea to me, but who knows?

Beverlyjoy WOW what an accomplishment throwing away those sesame sticks! Working the Beck strategies is certainly working for you…

Kim (bennyhannamama) Perhaps it’s not a ‘should’ but a ‘want’. You want to be healthy and be able to control your own diet. So you want to learn to do the things that support that, right?

midlifecrisis I'm not responsible for anyone else's feelings, good or bad – powerful news indeed.

Not a bad day all round - not far to drive to work or the hospital which is always a novelty. I am beginning to get burns so that is a bummer but not much longer - the nurse was terrific and gave me good advice and treatments to take home and use.

Credits:

• Reading my advantage / response / anti-craving cards - once
• Checked in to my diet coaches - here I am
• Sat down to eat - yes - always
• Ate mindfully / slowly and enjoyed every bite - pretty much - still not putting down my cutlery - will have to add that
• Spontaneous exercise - Not really - no opportunities
• Weighed myself (if at home) - not at home
• Did a daily schedule? - no
• Recognised hunger / fullness / desire / craving - yep - knew I was hungry for lunch and didn't finish what I have
• Used distraction and resistance techniques? Didn't need to - I was so distracted didn't think about food much
• Gave myself credit when on track - sometimes

Not so good:

• No exercise and a bit out of focus

Working on:

• Keeping it simple and not getting discouraged - still

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Worked hard. Felt good about it. Drove home in the rain. Realized that I didn't want to walk to the gym in the rain. Walked to the gym anyway. Good workout; CREDIT moi.

Eating was on-plan; CREDIT moi. Good news is that lunch included the fourth of five Lean Cuisine frozen meals that I bought on sale a loooog time ago. Good news only because it's now gone. I really don't like them. Don't even remember which species it was - I've already made up my mind that they all taste alike so I don't try to like them. Supplemented it with leftover butternut squash mashed with apples; now that was good. I have a rendezvous in the basement before I can go to work; Ugh.


ChinaMaine - Yay for buying a new charcoal grill to show you believe that spring will come. And Yay for posting before me this morning despite the time change, LOL. Yep, I only know one man who likes shopping for clothes. It shows; his presentation is impeccable every day - even at work.

Kim (bennyhannamama) - Yay for waking up at 5am to exercise. Good stuff, that.

Joy (gardenerjoy) - Congrats on a new low; just love that feeling myself.

Susan (hikergirl) - Yep, welcome "Sanity has returned to my eating." May it stay a while.

CeeJay - Costco cookies making you feel sick is such good feedback. Yay for small servings of good dark chocolate.

FutureFitChick - Yay for continuing with your planned exercise.

Shepherdess - Neat that you're doing the checklists to discover what you've overlooked. I generally choose to "overlook" the things that I don't want to do - because they're the things that will change my behavior, LOL.

Beverlyjoy - Ouch for taxes; Ouch for "sesame sticks." Did you ever wish to cover taxes with dish-washing detergent and stuff them in the waste bin when you're feeling the urge to prepare them? Taxes are not an emergency, LOL.

midlifecrisis57 - Thanks for the review of the Last Station; I just added that to my list.

Cheryl (seadwaters) - Ouch for "Didn't reverse into anyone today" being the positive statement of the day. Whatever, LOL. Kudos for continuing to eat mindfully with every bite.

Readers -

Hi coaches and beck buddies...

Yesterday was a healthy day...I am grateful. Still working on the taxes...making progress. Yes, Bill - I would LOVE to dump liquid dish soap on them and throw them in the trash!!

I went to my back doctor (DO) and got a manipulation...always helps the back. It always feels great right away, sore the next day and good the day after that for days.

A couple folks have asked why I am postponing my foot surgery. Many reasons, really. We have crappy insurance - with a $6000 out of pocket co-pay before the insurance company pays one dime. I would like to keep working to get money saved for the surgery. I need to be available to take care of my mom because she needs to have surgery. I have a hard time taking medications - I have a hard time thinking about facing the side effects of them. The recovery time is 4 - 9 monthes. Three monthes with non-weight bearing. My orthopedic doctor confirmed my fears that wearing a cast and a ortho boot WILL aggravate my back (that I will need to get a lift or special shoe to even out the level) and.....I am not brave about these things in general. That's why I am waiting as long as I can manage. My dear DH says to do whenever I want - not to worry about any of it. However, I am kind of a worry wort. No one need worry in my presence...I'll worry for them

I am still trying to prepare mentally for my 10 day trip. Am hoping and planning.

credits
gave credit
fork down, seated, no seconds
planned and logged food
lots of water
left a bite for snacks and meals
read arc/rc
feeling fullness - some of the time
tasting food - most of the time
mindful slow eating - most of the time
preparing for travel
used resistance techniques

oops
no exercerise
no spontaneous exercise
changed evening snack (fit it in and wrote it down)

Bill - good for you walking to the gym - in the rain. Glad you got your frozen meals just about gone...great add on. What's in the basement?

seadwaters - sorry to hear about the burns starting...I am glad the nurse was helpful. Big credit on being able to use the beck principles even while you are feeling the best. Feel better.

chinamarie - down .4 of a pound - hey, that's almost two sticks of butter. I am so happy that your program is going well. Yes...enjoy these springy days!

midlifecrisis - I am so glad to hear that therapy was so helpful. YES - eating will not taking away stress and all that. I wish we could tatoo this on our brains. It helps me to write it down daily in my journal.

bennihannahmama - good for you....first day of not spoking, getting up and doing exercises right and and planning when you don't really like doing it. You asked about my time away from home. First part of the trip - I am doing a birthday party for my wonderful stepmom - her 85th. I'll have lots of help from dh, cousins, and son. Then off to East Lansing (near you) to spend a week with my son, dil, and gs...also doing some programs at two elementary school. The best part of that trip is spending time with my gs!

Shout out to everyone!!!! Have a good beck day.

Hi there....posting. I stood on the scale. Went to the gym...otherwise--food totally off plan yesterday. I will regroup. I have kept the minimum commitment to myself 1) post to this thread every day 2) stand on the scale every day.
Bye for now
Susan

My second new low in two days!

And, I passed the mid-point of this month's exercise goal yesterday on the Ides of March.

WI: -0.25kg (new low), Exercise: +45, 805/1550 minutes for March, Food: op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

Shepherdess: congratulations on successfully finding a place for hunger is not an emergency. My favorite way to keep daily checklists is either laminated or put in one of those vinyl sheet protectors like you put in scrapbooks -- a dry erase marker can be used to check off the item each day. In the morning, I use a rag to erase the previous day's checks (or stars) and I'm ready to go again.

CeeJay: One of my daily snacks is 1/4 cup filled with half nuts and half dark chocolate chips. This seems to give me the feeling of a treat without actually triggering cravings for less healthy things. Nuts have all kinds of micronutrients and dark chocolate has antioxidants. Measuring is important, though, since they are calorie dense -- not measuring was a primary cause of my plateau.
I'm currently reading The Instinct Diet by Susan B. Roberts and she says that dark chocolate rarely triggers cravings, even in people for whom milk chocolate is a trigger. I've found that to be true for me.

Beverlyjoy: yay for all your credits, especially using anticraving techniques!

bennyhannahmama: what a long post! Good to see the dancing broccoli.
My inner rebel can get activated by shoulds and should nots, too. Lately, I've been keeping her busy with one of my Advantage cards: "Living an extraordinary life is a subversive act." That comes from reading Michael Pollan and David Kessler's books that talk about a food industry gone mad and how hard it is to simply eat real food in the modern world. My inner rebel likes the idea of being subversive and will, usually, help me with that goal rather than sabotage it.

midlifecrisis57: glad you are getting some rewarding experiences from therapy and from movies!

ChinaMaine: good job taking advantage of Daylight Savings Time the way it was intended!

seadwaters: "not a bad day all around" is doing pretty good under the circumstances. Glad you found a helpful nurse--a good nurse makes a wonderful difference.

BillBlueEyes: way to go with walking to the gym in the rain -- your weather made the national news last night. It sounds just awful.

hikergirl: good job keeping up with the basics -- that will ground the rest of your efforts!

Coaches/Buddies:
Ok, I've officially found something more frustrating than losing a post- losing a post I've typed on my Blackberry Anyway, last night I obviously never made it back to post. Should have gone to bed after I got my kids to bed at 8, but instead I stayed awake and really missed my cigarettes. I ended up doing some unplanned eating, but I made sure to read my 3 Advantages before I ate, I was sitting down and I ate mindfully and slowly I also made it through my 1st 24 hours w/out smoking
So, I refuse to continue to let myself stay stuck on Day 8: Create Time & Energy, but yet I continue to be resistant to making a set schedule. So, I am compromising by saying that the few mornings a week I have kid-free time, working on Beck will be top priority. That might involve exercise, planning, posting, etc. It's not ideal, but at least I now feel like I can move forward. Would love to hear how some you successfully implemented Day 8.

Hi Coaches

Yesterday I took my mom out. My mom is being treated for Alzheimer's but she's just really forgetful at this stage but I think she is a tiny bit worse that the last time I was out with her. I can't put my finger on it but the sadess it's triggered in me tells me it is so. Of course, with the time change, I lost that hour and so I was catching the morning bus at 7:30am to go across town to her place (3 buses to do that) and I made it for 9am. I was worn out before we started out. We went gambling, my mom's fav thing to do, and since money is not an issue for her as my sister who controls her finances, has built it into her budget, we go 2x a month, or more if we win. Anyway she was a bit worse, a bit more confused, than before. When we came home on the bus she wanted to comment on a woman's piece of jewelery and she asked me, in Hungarian, if I still remembered how to speak/understand Hungarian. I do and I did and she commented on her ring and we chatted about it and laughed and then spoke Hungarian here and there the rest of the trip back to her house. This was both sweet and bittersweet for me. The reason I speak Hungarian is because my grandmother/her mother raised me as she raised her. I grew up with my grandmother, not my mother. I am the only one of my mother's children who can speak Hungarian. So speaking this language, and especially in the way we were usng it, to talk about others, really reminded me of days long gone where my grandmother and I would share this secret bond between the two of us. I wanted to pursue it with my mother and I didn't. We never speak Hungarian to each other and yet, she remembered it flawlessly and I wonder if it wouldn't be a good thing and I could further use my Hungarian so I don't forget it. But I just felt so sad Like I just got this special version of my mother and I can feel her starting to change and slip a little bit more away. Plus, she is so hard on herself. Merciless. She told her dinner-table companion that we were going to the casino when I arrived to take her out and then she called herself "just so stupid" and "so dumb" for telling her eating companion where she was going. She calls herself stupid a lot now. It really bothers me and she won't stop. She repeated about being so stupid for telling P at the table where she was going more than a few times as she forgets and she speaks in loops. It takes a few loops before she gets caught up in the next one. There were no loops speaking Hungarian though come to think of it. Maybe I'll test that out the next time I am there with her.

Anyway why talk about all of this. Well I ate over it. She likes candy and I suggested we get candy. I wanted to feel better. I did not want to feel really sad with her beside me on the bus and I could feel myself slipping into it. So we got cookies and a choc bar and gummies. One package of each for each of us. We enjoyed eating them together and my blood sugar rose and I made it to the end of our visit without crying. I almost cried on the way home on the bus but managed to keep it in until I sat down to eat with DH. He said no matter what, every day I visit my mom is a good day, even if I don't always think it is, it is. And that going to visit is the best thing, the only thing, I can do as I can't change the course of her illness but I can visit.

Coaches it's tough. I need to be better prepared for my visits now. they really make me want to eat so I have to get a handle on it. I also ate sugar today at the movie theatre. They, ironically, had the exact thing that I had decided I would have at the store that turned out to not be the thing. The movie theatre didn't have the regular discounted ticket+ popcorn/pop combo they've had for forever. We purchased an expensive combo on top of our ticket and I, of course, was starving so the smallest combo was big popcorn, two drinks plus one candy. It felt fated I should eat them and so I did-credit though for sharing with DH and handing him the bag with some left in it. I was, however, done in, again, by my lack of planning. I am practicing life avoidance bigtime. I'm not sure I wanted to resist eating that stuff...
Right now I don't want to move forward.
As if there is a choice eh? Not really.
I don't want to fall backward though and regain weight that's for sure. I certainly do not want to wear and own those new floodpants long enough to wear out the inner thighs on them. ugh.

O well. No choice. Dr. Beck is right. Put it behind me, learn from it, and move on. Practice makes progress; progress not perfection.

Thanks for reading coaches.

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Went walking after work in shorts!!! CREDIT moi. Could feel the sun. Felt like Noah walking about after the waters receded. Made the walk an errand to stop at a nearby library, which was closed because it was Tuesday. In a zillion years I'll never remember the hours of this particular library - til 8pm some nights, til 5pm some, closed now and then. Oh Well.

Eating on-plan without interest, CREDIT moi. Except for the orange for evening snack. I'm into my oranges these days - they are just unbelievably good. Thanks to all you California growers out there.


onebyone - Just wonderful that you can have such a lovely day with your mom. It's been such a journey for you over the past few years to be able to do that. And it's neat that you cherish each of these visits - especially since they'll be less frequent when you're a resident of some neat neighborhood in London.

ChinaMaine - Yep, the time change does grant a slice of daylight for an evening walk. I saw a Turkey Vulture from my backyard yesterday - my first time ever from my own yard; they're just not that common around here. My DW reminds me that that's a sure sign of Spring since they've been gone for the winter.

Kim (bennyhannamama) - Ouch for lost posts - especially on a Blackberry since I don't know if they have a feature of opening another window with a file where you can save your posts before hitting [Submit]. Big Kudos for the first 24 hours without a cigarette.

Creating time and energy was a big one for me. I found that I wanted all the benefits of losing the weight, keeping it off, and getting into shape without any effort on my part. For me, I just had to make the commitment to allocate the time spent on this board, the time spent going to the gym and walking, and time spent shopping for the stuff I need for my lunches. I still want that all to fit into zero hours per week, but I'm better about the walking time now that I've learned to make it an excursion, an errand, or an exploration into the changing season.


Joy (gardenerjoy) - Yay for keeping up with your exercise plan for March. Yep, our weather was worth making national news. You'll have to tolerate my repeated references to Noah - that's just the way I've felt for a few days. Been pondering what they talked about on the Ark, "Looks like rain," LOL.

Susan (hikergirl) - Yep, keep to your minimum commitments - you'll pull yourself forward one day at a time. And then slowly you'll feel yourself getting up and starting to run.

Beverlyjoy - Yay for continuing your planning for the ten day trip. (If I've got the story right, Noah had to pack for 40 days and 40 nights - without a refrigerator, LOL.) It's new to me to hear the word "manipulation" for a DO session; descriptive term. In my basement was an attempt to accumulate my fair share of the 10 inches of rain that fell around here for some three days - attempting to make itself at home but thwarted by a constant removal by my DW and I using a wet-vac. But, that's all over; the sky is blue again. That's why I have Noah on my brain.

Cheryl (seadwaters) - Kudos for continuing with your Beck strategies despite having good reasons to be distracted. Ouch for the burns - emailing homemade chicken soup which was declared to cure everything when I was a kid.

Readers -

Diet coaches
Today was a good day - one day closer to finish, well cared for by nurses, good day at work. I came back home today and tomorrow I don't have to go to radiotherapy - it is machine maintenance day! And I get to work at home and not drive to Sydney for work either so it will be so nice to be in my home and able to catch up on work.

Food was fairly chaotic today because my schedule was all over the place so I scavenged as I could. I even found myself walking around eating an apple. I find it hard to see eating an apple while walking about as a bad thing. Once when on (yet another) diet, I used to walk the dogs in the afternoon and take along an apple - I loved it and if I didn't get an apple a day life felt strange. But I suppose it is mindless eating - although I always savoured that apple

It is interesting to read/see you all talking about the weather - the rain, the dark mornings, the difference. And how it affects your lives. I am hanging out for Autumn - and it is nearly here.

I got home very late so I am off to get organised before I fade. A big wave to all
Cheryl

The Good
- Throughout the day, I identified satisfaction vs fullness while eating, and I stopped eating when satisfied – credit!
- Throughout the day, I identified hunger vs non-hunger before I ate – credit!
- Eat mindfully, enjoying every bite – credit!
- Tolerated non-hunger without eating – credit!
- Used resistance techniques – yes!
- Give credit throughout the day for every positive eating behavior – credit!
- Spontaneous exercise – lots!
- I posted here – yes!

The Bad, and the Ugly
- Read the pink book – nope

Cheryl (seadwaters) Kudos for recognizing hunger, etc., including not finishing your lunch! Yes, I still have to remind myself to put down my cutlery during a meal too… I love your positive, pragmatic attitude. I hope the next couple of weeks go by quickly. And, I think it’s okay to eat the apple while walking about, if you are eating it mindfully (my 2 cents…)

Bill You went from wading in the basement to walking in shorts within 12 hours – lol.

Beverlyjoy Yay for putting your fork down and for leaving a bite at snacks and meals! And another yay for another healthy day…

Susan (hikergirl) Kudos for posting (especially on a day when it may have been tempting not to)! It’ll help you get back on track more quickly.

gardenerjoy Two lows in two days – kudos!

Kim (bennyhannamama) Yay for 24 hours without smoking!

one by one Sending supportive thoughts your way. You are being a wonderful, supportive daughter.

Hi Beck Buddies & Coaches -

Goodness - yesterdays food took several twists and turns. A few things changed along the way - however - I was able to stay in my calorie range. I am grateful. Part of it was being extremely busy, running around, doing a project, going to the dentist and thinking about weighing today. I didn't do alot of Beck tasks. I 'made' myself read my arc/rc before I went to sleep - so at least that was done.

I did weigh this morning. The scale shows that I have lost 3 pounds since last Tuesday. I am thrilled and happy! I know we're not suppose to hop on and off the scale. But, I had to check to see if it wasn't a fluke.

Today - I have much to do for the first leg of my trip. I have most of the things done for the 85th birthday party. I am getting excited to see some cousins I haven't seen since the last family wedding.

I am anxious, however, to be out of my food comfort zone. I have my rc, journal, beck book and I will try to carry on. I'll be using the food exchange plan., plus allowing up to 3 hundred extra calories daily. That seemed to work well when I was travelling in February. I am hoping for the willingness to use the Beck techniques. I will try to carry on. I am feeling hopeful because I was able and willing to try last time. I'll take it a day at a time.

credits
planned food (although it changed during the day - I didn't go crazy)
logged food
fork down, no seconds, ate seated
lots of water
left a bite of food after each meal and snack
read arc/rc one time
stretches and strengthening

oops -
changed plan
ate way too fast
didn't use many resistance techniques
no spontaneous exercise
did not look at beck book
didn't think about fullness

chinamarie - I am SO glad you found a new primary physician. It will make a huge difference when you feel more of a connection with your doctor. She seems to be making really sensible suggestions. I am always so happy for you because you continually eat mindfully and enjoying each bite. big credit, indeed.

seadwaters - I am glad you get a respite from your treatments. Sounds like you need it. It seems if you are very very mindful about eating your apple while walking the dogs...perhaps, it could be your only exception to the rule. I don't know if this is bad advice - maybe. Other's feel free to chime in. I have a friend in Melborne - she is tired of the hot weather and ready for fall. It's fun and funny to hear everyone always talks about the weather no matter what hemisphere in which you live!

bill - shorts! 0 wowzer! Good for you walking to the library even though it ended up being closed. Hope the basement is doing well. I have been loving Clementines this year - they are extra good.

onebyone - I am sorry it's so hard to visit your mom with her slipping away. It's a heart break. I think it's nice that you two are speaking Hungarian - yes, a special thing. As far as the food - it is over - dust yourself off, move forward the best you can, forgive yourself and plan, pla, plan. Glad you posted all this.

bennyhanamama - GREAT being smoke free for a day. As for day eight - making time. What I have done is to get up early and do my journal, write down all the things I hopefully will check off at the end of the day. I count calories, so I jot them down in my journal as the goes along. I try to go over 'the lisit' before I go to bed.

gardenjoy - WOW a new low in weight and surpassing your exercise goal....that major credit. Awesome

hikergirl - big credit for checking in and getting on the scale. You can do this!!!!

Shout out to everyone that stops by. Tomorrow I start the first leg of my journey. I will check in as often as I can - every day, I hope. Thanks for being my coach and buddy.