I've been that man... No ! I am that man. I lost 150 lbs and kept it off for 10+ years. When my eldest sister died suddenly is when I gave up. I REALLY gave up. I just didn't care, it felt as though my life had ended. In 6 years I managed to gain 100 lbs Thats what triggered me. I am slowly trying to get back into my pea brain that I am worth it and I shouldn't give up, but its VERY difficult.

My own words hit me like a brick last week. Read my first post about the car.

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=46892

I could cry, why do we do these sort of things to ourselves?

I watched a sermon on TV about 2 weeks ago, Joel Osteen. Our value is unmeasurable. He held up a $100.00 bill and said to the audience, does anyone want this ? Everyone said yes of course. So he crumbled it up into a ball and said, now, do any of you want this? Everyone said yes. He put it on the floor, stepped on it and said, its covered with grease, dirt and is hardly recognizable.... Do you still want it? The audience said Yes. He said you see.... no matter what kind of shape or what it has been thru, a $100.00 bill still holds its value. He then said we are so much more worth the $100.00 and no matter what happens to us, our Value is Unmeasurable and will NEVER change, NO MATTER WHAT!

Pretty good huh.

Leenie -- you are one of the kindest, most empathetic people on these boards. You go out of your way to encourage everyone and always have something positive and supportive to say. Yes, you deserve the car and the weight loss and everything else good in your life! Yes, you are worth it! I can't imagine how hard it must have been for you to lose your sister but I'm sure that she'd want you to take care of yourself now as much as you take care of everyone else.

I can't tell you how much I admire you for perservering through such tough times.

And it's not just about keeping the cravings at bay in the short term ... a plan that you can live with day-to-day week-to-week that allows for a little indulgence is going to be more successful in the long term than a strict, inflexible plan. Life gets in the way somtimes and your plan must account for that.

That's very good advice, needing to analyse why you got overweight. For me it was a combination of things:

I had been skinny up until age 18. I didn't use food as a comfort, I ate junk food just because I liked the taste and pigged out a bit. Not a lot, but a bit. My Mum cooked lovely nutritious meals. I did minimal exercise. I moved out of home, got on the pill, my metabolism died and lots of bad stuff happened and I found myself turning to food for comfort.

The weight piled on over four years. I realised a couple of times that things were dire, but just lacked the willpower to do anything about it.

Recently, as my BMI put me in the obese category, and as I was starting to get alarmingly overweight I woke up and realised what was going on. I realised why I was gaining weight and what needed to change. Diet. No more emotional eating. Incorporate exercise, especially weights.

Sme people just do not realise they are regaining the weight! I first lost weight when i was 15, i was never overweight, i was always in my healthy weight range for my height, and i lost about 10kg and i was in the lower weight range for my height and i felt wonderful, then i just started eating the crap at the school canteen and i gained 20kg in a years and i didnt really notice until it was being pointed out to me. And when i noticed i get depressed coz i now weighed like 10kg more then my original normal weight i had always weighed, so then i lost 11kg a year ago and then i put it back on, again, also did not notice. When you dont have fat roles or love handles and yuo kind of gain weight evenelly all over and you atill fit into small peoples clothing sotres it's hard to notice that you've changed much, you think that the stores sizing is incorrect, and it's only when you start shopping around that you think, ok i really am bigger then i think. When i look in the mirror i think i look slim because i dont have any rolls anywhere, but it is only when i try on clothes that i notice what size i am, so i have not brought any new pants coz i refuse to buy a size 16 (which is size 12Us). And i am now back on the path of losing weight for the 3rd time and iv dropped a few kilos so far, but i still have ages to go. I cantr believe how hard it is to maintain your new weight once u get down to it, i find it really hard. So i think that is why that guy was stuffing his face with sweets, coz he still see's himself as slim, and has not really noticed that he has put on so much weight. You would be doing him a favour by mentioning it to him so he can have a think about it, because it sounds like he will just put it all back on like how i and other's have. If someone had of said to me i was getting fat i would have been upset, but then i would have done something about it.

Yeah, you're right ... I gained 30kg in 4 years and was in TOTAL DENIAL. I thought I was overweight, but I did not think I was obese. And yet I was! The problem became VERY serious and that's when I woke up and said to myself, "WTF am I doing to my body!?!"