I was reading Step One of "The Twelve Steps" and I came to an even greater realization this morning... my disease has been causing great problems in my marriage. First and foremost I blamed my husband for everything. I blamed him for my unhappiness! And even moreso I had covered my emotions so much with food that there was no possible way to communicate my feelings with him. So I suppose he was really right when he told me "You never tell me anything anymore!"

I am just in awe at this still. I had no idea that I was drugging myself with food. I had no idea that I was doing this! Or that it was even possible for that matter.

I have been posting here a LOT lately!

Wow! Aren't you glad you got that book!
Sound like you're going through a heavy period of growth. Intellectually, that is. I'm so glad you're finding stuff out about yourself. Keep posting... we're so glad to have you here!

Thank You Ellis!

My life was turned upside down a few months ago (when my husband announced he was becoming a truck driver and would be gone 4 weeks at a time!) and so I've spent the past few months trying to better myself...which is what has led me to this point!

And not working, I have the time to reflect, read and think

You are so right. It's a disease that finds its way into so many parts of our lives. It's a great awakening. I remember when I first realized that I was free of the guilt and shame of overeating--I had a disease. I wasn't lame, incapable, stupid, or lacking will power. No! I had a disease that I couldn't possibly treat by myself.

Marny, you said it perfectly! I always thought I had little will power... but when I was complaining about my will power my family always told me off all the times I've demonstrated great will power, so I started to wonder what was wrong with me. Now I know!

I can't wait for my copy to get here. I love reading what you all share and I appreciate you being so willing to offer your thoughts and support. Jac, I have been reading through several of your posts and you are asking many of the same questions that I have! I am just so happy to be here! I just really feel like I was sent here for a reason and this may just be the answer I have been looking for for so long.

Water, This site has been an AMAZING resource to me! And when I'm struggling, I just come here and read... sometimes it really helps!

I find so much help and strength here. OA is amazing in that it's a system of people helping other people. Once you figure out something, you share it with others. There is so much honesty and love between people here. I feel truly alive when I'm talking, reading, or listening about OA.

I'm so glad that you guys are here.

Marny,
I can not thank you enough for your help (or kick in the rear) on my journey! I don't think I would have attended that first meeting if it hadn't been for reading your posts!

:-) Aw, shucks.