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Old 02-19-2015, 10:35 AM   #1  
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Default Newcomer needing lots of support


I've never participated in an online forum such as this, so hopefully I am introducing myself properly. I'm a recovering bulimic and practicing food addict. I recently hit a really low time in my life which brought me back to group therapy. This mostly came from a bad break up and some health problems that were discovered after this. I was recently diagnosed as pre diabetic. I'm 22 and that scares the **** out of me. So I am hoping to go on the road to everlasting recovery. In addition, I found out that I have a small tumor in my left breast. All in all, it's a lot to take in for a young woman of my age and I am being honest with myself that I need some outside support.

But I didn't start this thread to give my whole life story, rather to ask some specific questions so I can get on the road to recovery. I am at 205 currently, hoping to get down to 135. Started at 215. I am doing pretty well, I like the exercise I do during the week.

A few problems I am running into...
1) My job keeps me on my feet most of the day, I walk 10,000-12,000 steps a day (around 5-6 miles) and I have a really active work out schedule. I want my weekends to be my recovery days that still might include 15-30 minutes of stretching and yoga but no more than that. However I always find that I slip back into really terrible eating habits then.
2) This is pretty rudimentary but I was hoping someone could give me some insight or help combat stress eating which I do a lot. As if eating such and such will combat the hurt and pain and the overwhelming day I've just had.
3) I started practicing at 15, I haven't touched laxatives since I was 19. I'd like to open up to my parents about this struggle but I don't know how. They care about me dearly, and I know it is going to break their hearts to hear that I am very ill. So Mommas and Poppas that love their kiddos as much as my folks love me, let me know what you'd like to hear from your daughter.

Other than that, God Bless all and thanks for welcoming me into your community.
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Old 02-21-2015, 04:03 PM   #2  
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So happy you are here.
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Old 02-22-2015, 09:05 AM   #3  
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Coming from a mom and a food addict, you just need to be honest with your parents. They wouldn't want you going through this alone. If you are close with your parents, it will be easy to talk to them. If you are not, you just have to do it.
The weekends are for relaxing, not slipping into bad eating habits. I am struggling with this too but I have decided that if I have to pack a lunch on the weekends to stay eating healthy, then I will have to!
I also stress eat and I have been thinking before I put that stress food in my mouth, to what exactly set me off. Like someone told me the other day when I was bi*ching the other day... "Let the demons go!" It was so true! You have to let the stress go... easily said, not easily done but keep working on it!
Glad you are here, don't give up!
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Old 04-17-2015, 11:43 PM   #4  
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Firstly given a history of an ED i would strongly recommend you engage with a treatment team, get a medical etc. you mentioned you're recovering so i congratulate you in this!
It sounds like you are going through a lot!
in response to your post
a) separate exercise from nutrition. I find exercise needs to be enjoyable in its own right regardless of calories in/out. set small goals like doing a 10 minute youtube pilates/yoga sequence. or go for a walk whilst listening to a podcast do you're kept entertained. In terms of food i also think of weekends as time to relax. however relax to me means rejuvinating/recovering; the best time to get back on track with healthy eating.
b) have you done any mindfullness training? i know there are mindful eating apps for phones if you have one. then there are the three Ds, delay distract and another one i forget. i play tetris or solitaire for 20 minutes before committing to a food or snack that i'm craving to give me breathing time! For an eating disorder though maybe something more assertive like calling a friend, journalling, writing down your thoughts and feelings and what specific issue is bothering you before you engage in a behavior.
have you thought of non food based rewards for abstaining from a behaviour or engaging in a healthy one? keeping track of how many healthy days you have had?
c) without knowing the relationship you have with your parents, i think they would want to do anything they can to help.

hope this helps
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Old 06-16-2015, 05:09 PM   #5  
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Welcome! It sounds like you may be overwhelming yourself with creating a fitness and nutrition schedule for yourself. One of my largest points of failure was doing that, anyway. It may be better to simplify, especially on top of everything else that you have going on. We all want to be superwoman, and while our minds can handle it, our bodies usually can't.

It sounds like your time at work is quite a lot of exercise, it may be best to do that, plus two or three days of light work during the week, and then one weekend day of light work as well. Your body may not be pleased with all that you are doing to it, and it may stack up to failure as it could fight for what it wants when you're trying to give it what you want.

Definitely let them know when you are ready, I myself have had the same struggle and instead of being able to tell them I was "discovered", which was awful. I felt like I was standing naked in a crowded room, I just felt so...I don't know, exposed I suppose. It might be how or when you bring it up that could make it easiest for you. Definitely don't force it before you are ready because it is brand new to them, while it is very familiar to you, which could make them ask a lot of questions, etc. and make it feel like you are starting over again with all of it, if that makes sense.

As far as stress relief goes, my personal favorites are to unplug, shut off my phone and TV and computer and iPad and just sit alone with a book. I go to the zoo and to museums alone, so I can decide how long I do what and when, it is less stressful to decide how my own day goes. I just go out alone and disconnect from the world and reconnect with myself, enjoying my own company. It is my favorite form of stress relief and always works for me.

I am, of course, not trying to tell you how you feel and what you should do, just offering an idea that may work for you if you decide you would like to take it.

Good luck!! We are all here for you! You can definitely do this, you are much stronger than you think.
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Old 07-18-2015, 12:28 PM   #6  
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May God bless your journey,tell your parents,you have nothing to be ashamed of.We are all human.Love yourself even on the bad days.You are not alone.
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