See, now I feel bad. Your suggested response is gentle and gracious, whereas mine was a long-winded rant. I will definitely remember your words for future use.
See, now I feel bad. Your suggested response is gentle and gracious, whereas mine was a long-winded rant. I will definitely remember your words for future use.
I try to choose gentle and gracious, not so much because I think "most" people deserve it, but that when I give people the "benefit of the doubt" that their motives were misguided, out of frustration, or even just explained by ignorance, rather than out of maliciousness, I feel better. Feeling compassion and maybe even a bit of pity for someone, feels a lot better than thinking the world is full of people with malicious intent (or even a single malicious person out to get ME). I can deal with a bunch of idiots sticking their feet in their mouth, I can't deal with the thought of being surrounded by petty, malicious, and vindictive buttholes.
I like to think of the world as a mostly "good" place. Or to quote Katie in Horton Hears a Who:
"In my world everyone is a pony and they eat rainbows and poop butterflies"
This is why I don't say much about my weightloss- if people ask if I'm still dieting I say "yes" and that's about it. Unless there are people who genuinely ask questions I don't elaborate.
Hey some things don't work for certain people. Obviously she's been on WW many times and it didn't work for her BECAUSE she didn't realize that WW isn't a diet- it's a lifestyle change.
I can deal with a bunch of idiots sticking their feet in their mouth, I can't deal with the thought of being surrounded by petty, malicious, and vindictive buttholes.
I like to think of the world as a mostly "good" place. Or to quote Katie in Horton Hears a Who:
"In my world everyone is a pony and they eat rainbows and poop butterflies"
Yes, that approach is easier on the soul. I'll have to remember that.
I keep thinking of adding the Horton quote (In my world everyone is a pony and they eat rainbows and poop butterfies) at as part of my sig line. It's both naively optimistic, and yet by implication almost dark and disturbing (I think that's me).
My husband is dark and brooding on the outside (looks like an aging, but still potentially vicious biker/viking) and is a soft, squishy (and even conservative) teddybear on the inside.
I'm the exact opposite, all sweetness and normalcy on the outside with a generous and gracious manner (but sometimes with a darkly sinister, evil core). I have a tendency towards dark humor.
Many people remark that my husband and I seem to be opposites, but instead we're actually very similar (because both our external and internal personalities are both "us"). My theory is that one of us was just put together inside out.
Back to the original post, I have had a similar experience when a lady in my neighborhood group laughed when I said I was going to WW. She said that she gained 30 lbs while on WW.
I didn't respond, because she was justifying her weight loss failure (she's about 5'2" and at least 260 lbs) by blaming a program that she didn't clearly follow instead of understanding what went wrong for her. She is now trying to lose the weight on her own and since January has lost 10 lbs but regained 12...
I've gone from 244 to 187 now and find that dropping points is indeed a bit tough but is absolutely manageable. I admit that it will be hard if I drop down to only 19 points a day and it does scare me. But I have to remain confident and dedicated because that will mean success.
And you don't answer to your husband's co-worker, or to your husband. You answer to YOU and if you want this and WW is working for you, then just close your ears to the rest and stay the course.
Kira
I'm sorry she had such negative words about WW.
I've always believed that if you want something you've never had, you have to do something you've never done...and this is working for you and you're working this program! She cannot deny your results!! LOL Just brush off her comments and keep working hard!!! Who knows, maybe she'll eventually see your results and know that she's got to put forth more effort herself and you just might inspire her!
Hey, kaplods...I get the devil's advocate thing. And, as you stated, you are speaking from your experiences and with your personality. However, I've never been one to give unsolicited advice. The bottom line is, I try not to make other people uncomfortable with comments that I make, and, therefore, I don't share them unless I'm asked to. I think isn't rather conceited to think anyone wants to hear about the world according to Jae unless they say they say so.
Last edited by gaarmywife2007; 04-15-2009 at 09:32 AM.
I've learned to never listen to negative people...they usually have a problem & 99.9% of the time it's with themselves. Just put her out of your mind & focus on your journey.
It's hard to ignore them sometimes (I'm not usually very passive) but I gotta tell ya it can be a bit pleasing when you've lost the majority of your weight on WW & have their jaw drop the next time they see you esp after they ask how you did it & you say WW...duh!
As for the points dropping you'll adjust. It's not like you go from 30 to 19 the next day....it's a gradual thing.
Last edited by TJFitnessDiva; 04-15-2009 at 10:00 AM.
This wasn't about advice, but a second hand conversation. Getting angry about a conversation you weren't even party to, is pointless. And if hubby was talking about how much OP enjoyed WW, I wouldn't call that an unsolicited opinion.
It's not even clear from the OP what the woman said, and you certainly can't tell from a second hand conversation what she said, or what she meant by it through the filter of the husband (he's not a video camera, he's a human being, so OP didn't get the unbiased version of the conversation, she got her husband's interpretation of it).
I don't walk up to people and give advice, and in conversations try never to say "you should," or "you will," because everyone is different than I am, and I have no reason to believe that what works for me, will work for them.
I once had a woman (a stranger) in the Walmart pharmacy walk up to me (I was browsing the diet products, which apparently was invitation enough for her), start telling me what I needed to do to lose weight, because she had.
Of course, I had the right to get angry - but what would that have accomplished? It may have ruined her day, but it would have ruined my day in the process. Instead I just started laughing and walked away. I can't say that it ruined her day, but she did turn bright beet red.
I'm pleasant for a practical reason, not because I "love" people, but because I deserve not to get upset by idiots.
I'm pleasant for a practical reason, not because I "love" people, but because I deserve not to get upset by idiots.
Umm....I think that's the best thing I've heard in awhile next to your Horton's quote! I think I'm going to start saying that - I'm pleasant for practical reasons! lol.
And I agree with Romancediva - it's not a huge drop that you go through, it's when you get really low that it's HARDER but not IMPOSSIBLE. I mean, yeah, eating less food is harder (for me at least). On WW or on any other plan!
lmao my boss is like that, huge and doesnt track or even go to meetings, i counted the points of her lunch today ( in my head ) over 14 points for lunch
