Good morning everyone. Hershey and I got up at 5 for some dumb reason to get the day started. Still dark of course but looks like it might be a little less rainy - spotted a scrap of moon out there.
Did some baking yesterday for the 8:30 Wardens' meeting today. You have to have food at every darn event in the country. I guess it goes back to the pre-car era when it took half a day to get anywhere. Anyhow, date squares and lemon muffins are the offering this morning along with coffee, of course. I have no problem resisting this stuff - as long as I don't take even one bite. One bite leads to 50 - I really am a carboholic!
This afternoon we go to the Third World Bazaar - a big sale held in a huge barn near here. These folks import all kinds of stuff from underdeveloped countries and have weekend sales for 5 weeks. Lots of neat things like alligator Christmas ornaments, carved flying fish, exotic looking jewellery and scratchy hand knit sweaters and hats. (Come to think of it, that's where I bought my Chicken purse.) I don't know if I'll be doing Christmas shopping there but will most likely find something for me!
Good morning, ruth and all to follow. A quiet rainy morning--just heard hubby get up. We're off to wal-mart and alittle lunch and then it's on to the woodshed project. It got blown over in a recent storm so we're anchoring it better. If this sucker goes now, so will our house!!!! Need to get our wood supply out of the weather so it can be dry when we need it It's a trial to get a fire going w/o dry wood.
Cooked a pork roast in the crockpot overnight w/all the green peppers from the garden. Woke me up acouple times w. a wonderful smell. I usually make italian sandwiches out of it--i use only half a hoggie bun for myself for my "happy meal".
Got sucked up in 48 Hours last night and piling on more saddess over the WTT. I know what it does to me but i still watch. It's kind of a push/pull thingie.
Looking for salad dressing recipes. any out there you's care to share. Carol k
for Leens; buy the cheapest pork roast and wash and toss in the crockpot. Cut 2 huge grn pepper, 1 onion ,and 3 cloves of garlic, minced. Toss on top. Add 2 tbls of knorrs concentrate veggie broth and cook on high for about 8 hours or until it falls apart. makes lots of juice and i use some of it on my half of hoggie bun and save the rest and freeze for soups. It's great tossed on a lettuce salad w/ranch dressing. If you can't find the knorrs conc, try a can of swanson veggie soup broth and pour over it all--or chicken flavor, if all else fails. This will really make a lot more juice than just the 2 tbs of conc but it will be moist and still soooo good, carol k
Am watching hubby climb the ladder up the silo to check the automatic outside light. It appears not to work as it is VERY dark out here at night.
We're going into the village instead of making a trip to the city as we have to go to the city Tuesday. We both have medical appointments that day.
I did a funny the other night when hubby was gone overnight. I carefully locked the back doors and set the alarm and LEFT THE MAIN DOOR UNLOCKED! Chances of anyone breaking in are slim, but I still had my 9 millimeter handy.
We enjoyed the peanutbutter pie and we're taking the rest of it down the road to DD's house.
Take care and God bless!
Portland is almost sunny today. Although, I had to break out my heavy coat and my boots for the cold weather!
My grandma turns 70 today, so I am getting together with the rest of my family for a birthday celebration. I think she'll love it. We won't be here next year, so I want to make the most of it today!
Not too much is new and exciting around here. I've been having the WORST cravings for carbs, but so far I have resisted. (Ok, I broke down the other day and had a blended mocha, but it was nasty). That scale still will not budge. I can't figure out why I can't just go to bed at 240 pounds and wake up at 150!!! Is that REALLY too much to ask!!
I hope you all have a great weekend! Enjoy it and take time to tell someone how much they mean to you!
Jenni: If you go to bed at 240 and wake up at 150 I wanna take a nap in your bed ROFLMFAO !!!!!!!!!!
Carol: You gottta give me your recipie for the roast yummmmmmmm. I never cook pork roasts, don't know how but boy that sounds sooooo good.
Tip: I bet you enjoyed watching hubby's butt up the ladder LOL....peanutbutter pie.....oh just shoot me why don't you LOLOLOL.....nummmmmmy
I was supposed to go to Mom's today but we changed it to tomorrow, Jim's working late (actually he's painting his Van) so we won't have time to do what we needed to do.
Gracie's napping now (11:24 am) but when she awakes I think I'll take her to the park for a walk since its going to be around 80 degrees today and beautiful........mama needs fresh air LOL.
Well, I am just a busy goose today, laundry, laundry. laundry, more Christmas crafts, trip to Fabricland for more supplies, did the dishes and even woke up early to let my poor dh sleep in from his 9 hour drive back from Ohio. his compnay used to fly them down, but these days, no more. Did anyone see Oprah yesterday? Gosh, just gave me the willies! And here I thought the government was making it safe to fly again!
Had a major break through last night about my eating issues, one that has opened a lot of doors to why I am a carb addict. First, better back up. I have been on a week long binge, candy and chocolate especially. I was even forfeiting dinner to eat whole bags of chocolate and candy and I felt horrible and tired. My dh came home last night from a week long business trip and I confessed to him what I had been doing in hopes he could help me straighten around. We discussed my "lack of commitment" to my WOE and why I am making exceptions and excuses for myself. He felt that I was not focused enough and if I really wanted to lose the weight I would be stronger in my resolve to do something about it. I felt that life just isnt as black and white as he wishes it could be, the fact that I do have setbacks and binges shows how hard the struggle is for me, that I have to pick myself up, dust myself off and move on. This lead us on to discussions about some things in the past where I used to feel the same way as he did about things and how in the end I ended up losing out on it all. Well, did you know that I considered myself a total failure? I felt that if I didn't change to suit the situation then people exited my life or they abandoned me. I realized that all this time I have been feeling depressed because I felt that it was all my fault for these things happening to me. I blamed and shamed myself into thinking I was solely responsible for some of the terrible things that had happened and to avoid feeling those things I ate and ate and ate because the food is my friend. Food doesn't judge, it's always there, it always makes you feel good and you can have it every time. I stuffed my face as much as I stuffed my feelings. Last night dh gently took my face as I was crying away and told me that I was NOT a failure, that I had raised a lovely daughter and our marriage is rock solid and he wasn't going anywhere, ever. I realized at that moment that he had more faith in me than I had in myself. So here I am, the day after and ready to pick myself up and start again, this time knowing WHY I do this. I am also not unrealistic to the fact that after years of abusing food that my body's chemical balance is completely messed up and that I have to treat myself as a patient, one who has a carb addiction and one who must work hard to overcome.
So if you've read this far, thanks for letting me spill my guts!
I feel for you, girl! That husband of your sounds like a winner in my book! When you find some more like him, send some my way, okay? You are entitled to your feelings, but it must be so great to have someone say, "Okay, wake up, this is not what is really going on." I'm glad you came to some resolution in this situation, and I'm praying for you, as well as all the rest of us who need more willpower, more strength, more motivation, more self-esteem, etc, etc. It's a long road, but one that fortunately does have a light at the end of it.
Isn't it interesting what we tell ourselves! YOur post reminded me of an issue I had for many years. I'll start at the beginning.
At the age of barely four, I contracted polio. That was in 1946, at a time when little was known about it. We lived in a farmhouse with no plumbing and the only caregivers I had were my parents and my mothers aunt. At a time when I must have been in terrible pain and running a high fever(no pain medication), my parents put a board at the foot of my bed and told me to press my foot against it to keep it from becoming a club foot. Now...here is a child, burning up,and having the disease attacking her body,, and her bowels were stopping and these people wanted her to be able to press her foot against a board!!
Anyway, my foot twisted along with other physical disabilities, BUT I survived.
Somewhere in my mind though, I always blamed myself for ANY medical problem I had. Whether it was a cold or Post Polio Syndrome, a voice told me it was my fault!
It told me years to get it through my thick skull that I have no control over medical problems.
I don't blame my parents as they must have been terribly frightened and must have also felt so helpless. They worked day and night putting hot packs on me as that was the only treatment for polio.
I'm sharing this so others might realize what that inner voice might be telling them and maybe, they shouldn't listen! God bless!
Wow Tippy, what an experience! Yeah, strange that we seem to find ourselves in a situation and suddenly it becomes all our fault. I hope that you've been able to move past the medical issues with the polio, pardon me but I don't know much about the disease except that is can make your muscles atrophy. Glad to know that I'm not the only one out there that blames themselves for things that are beyond our control
Thanks a bunch for your kind words Sherrie As for my dh, well he's just one in a million and I doubt I'll ever meet anyone like him anywhere--but if I do, I'll be sure to pass on your name!
As for me today, I'm trying very hard to get beyond the guilt of the past and I have noticed that the attraction of food has lessened somewhat. I know that I am now at a chemical disadvantage--carb addiction is hard and I have to be positive and stay focussed, something very hard to do when I'm already battling an anxiety disorder. I am working had and I WILL WIN!!!
Wow! Some deep stuff here today, Chicks. I feel truly honored that Pooky and Tippy both felt comfortable enough with us to share their innermost thoughts and feelings. It makes me feel guilty that my overeating is just the result of pure gluttony. Still, what you have said about not blaming yourself struck a chord in me. I've blamed myself for years, mainly for having so little will power. In a sometimes lonely and unforgiving world, food is such a comfort. I spend a lot of time alone because my DH is a workaholic. It's obvious to me that he doesn't have the same need for companionship from me that I wish for from him. Over the years I've learned to fill my spare time with friends and projects, reading and gardening, but there's still an emptiness that I tend to fill with forbidden foods. What to do? Well, first I had to concede that there was no way I was ever going to change my hubby. Therefore, that meant that I was going to have to change myself if I was ever going to find contentment. I had to learn to please myself and before I could please myself I had to be pleased WITH myself. That meant finding a weight loss program that works, is satisfying and flexible.
Then I had to commit to increasing my exercise and I had to find activities that I really enjoy. Also, I can't put my life on hold waiting for DH to have time for me. That's why I went to Scotland with my daughter and had a wonderful time. If the opportunity arises again and I have the money, I will do it again. No more sitting at home eating myself into oblivion while he's off doing his own thing. Not all marriages are made in heaven and not all mates are soulmates but this marriage has lasted 37 years so it can't be all bad. In fact, I'm very lucky compared to many women, especially those poor, downtrodden women in Afghanistan. Therefore, I have to separate my marriage and my food issues and just get on with life.
Sheeesh, does any of that make any sense? I do blabber on sometimes.
A mixed bag of weather today. The sun trying to come through the clouds. Hopefully it's successful because I just bought tons of bulbs and I'd like to get the garden ready to plant them.
Enjoy your weekend, Chicks.
Thanks to all for sharing this weekend. I think the recent events in the world have made us all stop and think. Life is short and we had better all get as much out of it as we can!
Wish I could go into more, but sorry, it's late. We just came back from my daughters house (Kudos at 3fc). It was wonderful to finally be able to see her and the kids. I've not seen them since December. She finally put her SSSSSSSH DH out. Ten years of absolute ****. I'm very worried about her as with four kids and no education or work experience it's going to be tough. But she's finally out of a horrible abusive marriage. Please keep her in prayer. Her strength with God will see her through.
LOL@Ruth! Good comment, friend!
MamaJ, I understand what you are feeling about your DD. As a mother, it is so painful to stand by and watch our children have to deal with unhappiness and pain. We want to take it away for them. But, we can't. No more than our parents could for us. Thank God that "he" is out of her life and she will be able to rebuild it. And, she will. It might not be easy, but nothing worth fighting for is easy. God bless.
The Weekend - Oct 13 and 14
It appears not to work as it is VERY dark out here at night.
Chances of anyone breaking in are slim, but I still had my 9 millimeter handy.
Oh, Pooky!!
Still, what you have said about not blaming yourself struck a chord in me. I've blamed myself for years, mainly for having so little will power. In a sometimes lonely and unforgiving world, food is such a comfort. I spend a lot of time alone because my DH is a workaholic. It's obvious to me that he doesn't have the same need for companionship from me that I wish for from him. Over the years I've learned to fill my spare time with friends and projects, reading and gardening, but there's still an emptiness that I tend to fill with forbidden foods. What to do? Well, first I had to concede that there was no way I was ever going to change my hubby. Therefore, that meant that I was going to have to change myself if I was ever going to find contentment. I had to learn to please myself and before I could please myself I had to be pleased WITH myself. That meant finding a weight loss program that works, is satisfying and flexible. 
