[medic4life]

Hi all, I'm in a rut. I'm so negative and I don't want to be that way. I don't fit in my uniform shirts any more and my pants are tight. I'm so miserable. I just want to sit and cry. I'm having emotions I don't remember ever feeling before. Help!!! I want chocolate and sugar all the time as if it'll make me happy. I eat that stuff and still I don't feel better. Has anyone ever felt so down like this? What will make the difference for me? What do I need to do so I'm not so depressed? I feel fat and ugly in everything I wear. I refuse to be naked in front of my bf. I just want to die, well no I don't but I feel really horrible. I weighed 174 lbs when we met a year ago and now I weigh 210 lbs. He says he loves me regardless and will always love me bigger or thin. But how can he love me if I don't love myself? I need a pick me up, has anyone got anything for me??? I am sorry for being so negative. I have no one to help but you guys.

Thanks for listening,
Robin

[ValRock]

*hug* You can do anything you set your mind to!!! I remember feeling the very same way not too long ago. Don't give in to your self defeating talk, it won't help you!!! Make a plan and stick to it!!! Good luck and hang in there ok!

[medic4life]

hey thanks, I'm hoping this doesn't last long. I hate self pity.

[lilybelle]

Yes, I have been this down before. Especially before I started losing weight. My happiness and self-esteem was very much wrapped up in my weight. I know this isn't how it's supposed to be, but in truth it is exactly what a lot of women deal with. I didn't know how my DH could love me because I didn't love myself. I didn't have to lose a lot of weight to start feeling happier, I just had to get on a plan and stick to it. I felt better after a week because I could see I was doing something about my situation. With each lb. lost I became more and more confident. It doesn't happen over-night but getting started is a huge step in the right direction. Patience and Perseverance will be the winner in the long run. When you fall, you brush yourself off and jump right back on the wagon. No one is perfect and mistakes will be made, but never give up. There are tons of eating plans and groups on here, choose whatever you think will best suit you for life. Good luck. Post here and read forums as much as possible, it helps me tremendously.

[silversun]

i have felt this down before......then i found out my thyroid medication was too low. it happens every time i need to adjust it because of needing more. getting your thyroid function checked might be a good idea....low thyroid can cause weight gain and alot of other problems. good luck

[Jtjoray]

I have felt the same way many times. I ask my husband all the time how he could even want to be with me? Especially when I look at my before pictures. I gross myself out how could he want to look at me. But just know that you are in the right direction to help yourself. We all get in these ruts once and awhile. The hard part is just getting yourself out of it.

[medic4life]

Thank you for all your positive words. You're right, it doesn't matter how many times you fall, just how many times you get back up and dust yourself off. I've always been able to do that and I'm going to do it now too. I'm off for a walk right now, I hope it doesn't rain. I had some plaine oatmeal for bf and a coffee and I'm ready to start my day. Thank you for all the support. I want to make it this time. I hope you all have a wonderful day.
Robin