Hi, everyone!

My name is Estelle; I'm 51, married, no kids, and needing to lose about half of my body weight.

I've had lots of health challenges over the past few years - high blood pressure, the beginnings of degenerative joint disease, and two bouts with cancer (non-Hodgkins lymphoma and breast cancer). I've had 4 surgeries since last August, as well as chemo. I've had bilateral mastectomies with reconstruction (I'm still a little swollen from that) and a hysterectomy also. I'm at 5 weeks out from the hysterectomy and the final reconstruction surgery.

At my last visit with my oncologist, we found that I have elevated liver enzymes. I went in last Friday for a CT-scan of my abdomen to see what's up with the liver. It's possible that it's a fatty liver and that I may be pre-diabetic (other issues are going on with my blood sugar being a little wonky too).

Last Monday, I started Phase 1 of South Beach. I was doing fine until that trip to the doctor and then things went sliding downhill since. I guess right now, I'm not really following any kind of diet.

I'm really frustrated with it all. I really need to be able to talk out my emotions but my husband doesn't want to hear it. I wind up staying up half the night and grazing (and getting grief from him over it). Sigh . . .

Anyway, I found this site last night by accident and started reading a little about the Sonoma Diet and it got my curiosity. I bought the book today (despite protests from hubby over yet ANOTHER "stupid diet book" . . . he will buy whatever he wants without talking to me about it, but I can't get things I discuss with him . . . by the way, I'm the major bread winner in our house ) and I'm going to start reading it probably before I go to sleep tonight.

It's really hard for me to follow any kind of eating plan when I feel that he sabotages me at every turn. He is at least as much overweight as I am and probably has a lot of health issues going on, but he won't see a doctor. He needs to lose weight, but he just wants to take pills or do SlimFast. If I do South Beach, he does something else. If I try WW, he wants to do South Beach. He's harped all along about wanting to follow a Mediterranean way of eating. Well, I'm trying to show him the Sonoma book, and it's like talking to a wall.

Sigh . . .

Anyway, I am going to do this, with him or without him. Probably in spite of him! I have to do this for my health. I don't have much choice. I just hope that I don't lose a shoe when I cram my foot up his rear end.


P.S. And as you can see from my information over < --- there, I lost one measely tenth of a pound in my first week! I logged into the South Beach site and did my weigh in, and it gave me a "canned" response. "With that .1 pound, you are well on your way!" Yeah, right. And pigs can fly too.

If you haven't already, check out the 100lb club! There's lots of us there!!! And at least one cancer survivor who can probably help you with some of the specific stuff your going through.

This is your weight loss journey. Yours. It would be nice if your hubby was supportive, but you need to be prepared for him to be a naysayer. Mine was. I joined the gym, and he was like "how long is that going to last.....are you sure you really want to commit for a year???"

Well honey, 18 months on, 64lbs down so far, and I've been to the gym at the bare minimum 3 times a week, and usually 5 to 6 take that dh

There's a million diets out there. What worked for me was eating sensibly and exercising. My weight is coming off slowly, but that's fine with me. I get to wear my nice clothes a bit longer before I shrink out of them again

Before you start to pick your plan, I think you need to address some of the issues that have brought you where you are with your weight, and start to get some confidence back. It's a long hard road to get to a normal weight, and you need to have as much in your favour as you can muster.

Love and good wishes

Kylie

Welcome to the boards CD!!!!! I'm glad you're here. This place is FULL of supportive, awesome people. I hope you find a support group just right for you!

You've been through so much I wish you all the success you deserve

Take care and I hope to see you around,
Tirzah

I am a two time cancer suvivor as well!!! (ewings Sarcoma at 16 and Leukemia at 24, 1 year and a bit ago) What an accomplishment in and of itself!!!! you should be very very proud!!!

That said, I gained weight during my treatments. The first bout it took me about 9 months to get it off, and this time it took me a year to get back to my starting weight...my body still look completely different though...

I think you would just forget about your hubby, he doesn't seem to be a very good support for you, in regards to weight loss, for what ever reason (maybe he is afraid of you getting sexier and then leaving him or something or maybe he just cannot be you supporter rightnow cuz he is exhusted from support you though you illness... I dunno), but I say forget him, do it for you!!! We BOTH know how presious our health is!!

I have had my share of people trying to sabatage my "getting healthy" efforts(by the way, think of this as GETTING HEALTHY not losing weight, the weight loss will just be a bonus)~ if I say to them I am watching what I eat they always say "one wont hurt" blah blah blah... well I have gotten to the point where i just plain REFUSE their offers (if its rude too bad they are being rude by insisiting!)

so yeah, I am writting a novel here, but I just wanted to let you know you are not alone. there are emotional, spritiual, physical, issues that come with being a cancer survivor so if you need some on to listen or WHATEVER PM any time!

Hi Estelle,

This is my first visit to this website. I read your post and then went to register. I admire what you have already accomplished, what you've been thru and now, your desire to lost weight to become more healthy. I too have the elevated liver enzymes and sometimes I imagine my liver and how it reacts to what I put in my body. The thing is, I've lost weight before and my liver enzymes would be normal. But what did I do?? Yep, I gained it right back! I've told my hubby it's like I'm fighting nature...this battle I have with my weight. Most of the time, when I go on a diet, it's because "I want to look good". This time I'm going to try a different approach. It's like I can almost feel my body screaming out to me to do something different. I think I'll check into the Med. diet, (since that is one I haven't tried in a long list of ones I have) but for now, I'm going to use some of my vast wisdom from reading countless articles on healthy eating and take my first steps toward that today. I don't mean to presume, but I bet I know how you felt when you went to that doctor and he told you about yet ANOTHER problem. How could you deal with that AND this new South Beach Diet at the same time?? For me sometimes, instead of doing what I know is the best for me, I'll do right the opposite (maybe because of nerves, worry) Anyway, today I'm starting to do something for my (fatty) liver.....and I hope you'll join me. *wink* (I"m so new here, I don't even know where the little smiley faces are...lol Linda

I agree with Fitgal....weightloss within itself is a novel!!!! It is a long, hard journey, but the beauty of it is that it can be done.
Your husband probably feels like you aren't going to stick with it. Despite his intentional or unintentional verbal sabotage you can and will do it. He probably wants what is best, but doesn't know how to say it. And because he is overweight too, he is probably having his own inner struggles. You may have to be the example for him. You know you can just change the way you prepare foods in the house and he can either get on board or abandon ship!!! Call it a lifestyle change. Somethings you may have to do yourself. Exercise (whatever kind you can get in), drink water, high protein-low carbs (due to that fatty liver), prayer-much prayer-much more prayer and patience will do it. It takes time. You probably wont see any changes on the surface within the first few months, but if you stay with it it will come off.

Hi Estell, You have been through a very hard time lately!!! He're a big hug, to start with! I have been up and down with the weigh issue for awhile too. I finaly just gave up on diets and decided to eat "healthy". It's worked for me. With your health issures maybe it could work for you. My liver enzymes are off too and I had BP that was rising. and diabetes is always a scare. I want to lose weight to look good but I also want to be healthy!

Let me know if you want to be e-mail buddies.

sorry..this is just a test